I am in Heaven now, sitting on God's lap. He loves me and cries with
me for my heart has been broken. I so wanted to be your little girl. I
don't quite understand what has happened. I was so excited when I began
realizing my existence. I was in a dark, yet comfortable place. I saw I
had fingers and toes. I was pretty far long in my developing, yet not
near ready to leave my surroundings. I spent most of my time thinking or
sleeping.
Even from my earliest days, I felt a special bonding between you and
me. Sometimes I heard you crying and I cried with you. Sometimes you
would yell or scream, then cry. I heard Daddy yelling back. I was sad, and
hoped you would be better soon. I wondered why you cried so much. One
day you cried almost all of the day. I hurt for you. I couldn't imagine
why you were so unhappy. That same day, the most terrible thing
happened. A very mean monster came into that warm, comfortable place I was in.
I was so scared, I began screaming, but you never once tried to help
me. May be you never heard me. The monster got closer and closer as I was
screaming and screaming, "Mommy, Mommy, help me please Mommy help me."
Complete terror is all I felt. I screamed and screamed until I thought
I couldn't anymore. Then the monster started ripping my arm off. I hurt
so badly; the pain i can never explain. It didn't stop. Oh, how I
begged it to stop. I screamed in horror as it ripped my leg off. Though I
was in such complete pain, I was dying. I knew I would never see your
face or hear you say how you love me. I wanted to make all your tears
go away. I had so many plans to make you happy. I couldn't; all my
dreams were shattered. Though I was in utter pain and horror, I felt the
pain of my heartbreaking, above all. I wanted more than anything to be
your daughter. No use now, for I was dying a painful death. I could only
imagine the terrible things that they had done to you. I wanted to tell
you that I love you before I was gone, but I didn't know the words you
could understand. And soon, I no longer had the breath to say them; I
was dead. I felt myself rising, to a beautiful place.
I was still crying, but the physical pain was gone. The angel took me
to God and set me on His lap. He said he loved me, and He was my
Father. Then I was happy. I asked Him what the thing was that killed me. He
answered, Abortion. I am sorry, my child; for I know how it feels. "I
don't know what abortion is; I guess that's the name of the monster." I'm
writing to say that I love you and to tell you how much I wanted to be
your little girl. I tried very hard to live. I wanted to live. I had
the will, but I
couldn't, the monster was too powerful. It sucked my arm and legs off
and finally got all of me. It was impossible to live. Also, Mommy,
please watch out for that abortion monster. Mommy, I love you and I would
hate for you to go through the kind of pain I did. Please be careful.
Love,
Your Baby
