Drench us all with old Bravari
	Author: Vir Here's another one, roughly in the tradition of Walt Kelly's "Deck Us All with Boston Charlie": Drench us all with old Bravari Naraneck a Kosh, and Ulkesh, too Triluminate the Minbari Take a piece of flarn and age some spoo Don we now our Ranger leather Epsilon, Procycon, Ragesh II Zip then fasten all together Last best hope for peace, and sing woo hoo! --------------------------------------------------------
	We three Rangers of Proxima are
	Author: Belgarath To the tune of We Three Kings: We three Rangers of Proxima are; Bearing gifts for the Entilza; Jump gates and hyperspace we're crossing; Following the White Star. I know its not complete but it might give one of you a good start. Enjoy.
	Jingles Gates
	I Thought I'd pass this along. I don't know who the author is. Jingle Gates... 'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house Not a creature was stirring, except Papa's mouse. The computer was humming, the icons were hopping, As Papa did last-minute Internet shopping. The stockings were hung by the modem with care, In hope that St. Nicholas would bring new software. The children were nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of computer games danced in their heads. Dark Forces for Billy, and Doom II for Dan, And Carmen Sandiego for Pamela Ann. The letters to Santa had been sent out by Mom, To: santaclaus@toyshop.northpole.com Which has now been re-routed to Washington State, Because Santa's workshop has been bought by Bill Gates. All the elves and reindeer have had to skedaddle, To flashy new quarters in suburban Seattle. After centuries of a life that was simple and spare, St. Nicholas is suddenly a new billionaire. With a shiny red Porsche in the place of his sleigh, And a house on Lake Washington that's just down by the bay. The elves have stock options and desks with a view, Where they computer code for Johnny and Sue. So be sure you have plenty of space on your hard drive Because from now on Christmas runs only on Windows 95. More rapid than eagles the competitors came, And Bill whistled, and shouted, and called them by name. "Now, ADOBE! now, CLARIS! now, INTUIT! too, Now, APPLE! and NETSCAPE! all of you are through. It is Microsoft's SANTA that the kids can't resist, It's the ultimate software with a traditional twist - Recommended by no less than the jolly old elf, And on the package, a picture of Santa himself. Get 'em young, keep 'em long, is Microsoft's scheme, And a merger with Santa is a marketer's dream. To the top of the NASDAQ! to the top of the Dow! Now dash away! dash away! dash away - wow!" And Mama in her 'kerchief and I in my cap, Had just settled down for a long winter's nap. When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, The whirr and the hum of our satellite platter, As it turned toward that new Christmas star in the sky, The SANTALITE owned by the Microsoft guy. As I sprang from my bed and was turning around, My computer turned on with a Jingle-Bells sound. And there on the screen was a smiling Bill Gates, Next to jolly old Santa, two arm-in-arm mates. And I heard them exclaim in voice so bright, Have a MICROSOFT CHRISTMAS, and TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT.
	What I learned from B5
	Title: What I learned from B5 Author: ellie tyler 1. Faith Manages. (coming from an agnostic and practiced skeptic, that may or may not say a lot) 2. Ya gotta stand for something or you'll fall for anything... (the song now running rampant thru this cluttered brain) ...you've gotta be you're own man, not a puppet on a string... [*slap* why thank you Mr. Keeper. I needed that.] 3. The price of peace [and freedom] is eternal vigilance [not to mention the astronomical costs of build an maintaining all those White Stars]. 4. Chicken soup and a tape of old B5 eps makes staying home sick seem like a vacation. 5. Try to see the world from someone elses view sometime - they may surprise you.
	The Vorlon Who Stole Christmas
	Title:"The Vorlon Who Stole Christmas"...It's a holiday tradition! Author: Blind Man Or, y'know, maybe it's not. (Does posting something two years in a row constitute a tradition?) Anyway, since it's the holiday season, and since my new Christmas UI won't be ready to go for awhile, I figured I'd repost last year's... How The Vorlon Stole Christmas On a mountaintop cold there lived a Vorlon, who was older and colder and mean. He went everywhere in an encounter suit that was black and brown and green. He lived above a village called Whoville, whose residents he'd grown to hate. He'd tried to forget them, put them out of his mind, but a Vorlon's memory is great. Indeed, today he could see them down there, all scampering about as they played. For tomorrow was Christmas, which was indeed their very favorite day. The Vorlon could see Who number four, with his longcoat and his scarf, and next to him Who number six, whose outfit made the Vorlon barf. Yes, all eight Whos were out there, along with K-9, Leela and Ace, and all the other Companions, too, were prancing 'round the place. And they were not alone, no sir! For there was Sheridan, Delenn and Lennier! The Drazi and the Markab, even little Vir! "Oooh, how I hate them," the Vorlon snarled, "as they eat their spoo and their flarn, prancing about like a bunch of fools-- even the Centauri and Narn! "The Shadows must have touched them all, this situation must be corrected. For chaos is evil and order is good, and must at all costs be protected." And the Vorlon, he planned, and the Vorlon, he schemed, and eventually came up with a plot; and since he had nothing better to do, he decided to give it a shot. And when nightfall came, he stole into town, and stole from each house its Christmas joy. He took all of the trees, he took all of the food, he even took all of the toys! And when he'd robbed the last house blind, and was taking a final gander, he heard a sound and spun around-- and there was little Lyta Alexander! He watched her for a time, quite carefully, to see what she might try. She watched him right back, and then she said, "Why, Santa, why?" The Vorlon thought a moment, and then it came to pass, he scooped her up and boosted her powers, so now she could kick some *serious* ass! Then Lyta watched him in stark fear, uncertain what might await her. And he knocked her out, threw her in his bag (since she might be of use to him, later). And then the Vorlon flew back home, cackling all the while. He'd pulled it off! And better yet, he'd done it with such *style*! Then the Vorlon turned around and looked upon the town below, its streets and roofs all covered with the white, new-fallen snow. "Who are you?" he asked, and then he laughed with vicious Vorlon glee. "Who gives a damn? I've got your stuff! It all belongs to me!" He threw the booty in his ship, and headed into space. And pushed a button to send a message off to the Vorlon race. And as dawn came, the folk of Whoville woke, and not a one was tardy. For though their stuff was missing, gone-- it was still Christmas, and time to party! And party they did, until a shadow fell across the little town. They all looked up and gasped with fear-- a Vorlon planet-killer was bearing down! The people screamed, the people ran, but no one escaped the big zap. Even their houses didn't withstand it for long, because if it's not Scotti******'s CRAP! So Sheridan, the Whos and all of their friends died in the fiery flash, their lives cut short, their bodies destroyed, their homes all burned into ash. Now, the moral of the story is don't have too much fun. And never piss off a Vorlon, even *if* you are "The One"... :) Blind Man

This page sponsored by		Get your FREE HOME PAGE