JUNGLE PARTY OF PATRIA

Welcome to the Jungle!  The Jungle Party of Patria is a new party for the 2006 elections, created by popular demand of the Clones - Patria's faithful devotees of the Jim Rome Show - to have Jim Rome elected to the 48th Congressus Patriaë, along with the leader of the XR4TI Crew, "Mr. Automatic"  J-Stew.  We will also vote in Iafrate, Terrence from Sierra Madre, Jeff on a car phone in Phoenix, Greg in Vegas, Rachel in Houston, and of course the Cablinasian, provided they can obtain Patrienish citizenship and are otherwise qualified to sit in Congress (i.e. no felony convictions).  Rack 'em!  Bang your monkey!  Run the smack from your pie-hole!  In your grill!  WAR - Jungle Party smack for the 48th Congress!


About Jim Rome:

Perhaps the most respected voice in the world of sports broadcasting, Jim Rome is the leading opinion-maker of his generation. As host of the nation’s premiere sports radio talk show, Rome is known for his aggressive, informed, rapid-fire dialogue.

Jim has established himself as the top choice of athletes and fans when it is time to know what is going on beyond the scoreboard.

Rome’s nationally syndicated radio program, The Jim Rome Show, a.k.a. The Jungle, airs on more than 185 radio stations each weekday and boasts more than two million listeners.

But these are no ordinary listeners; they are a legion of fans known as the clones who live and breath for Jim Rome’s “take” on the day’s larger issues of sport. It is his departure from conventional sports commentary that has resulted in Rome’s unique dialogue with his listeners.

In addition to his daily radio grind, Rome hosts Jim Rome Is Burning, a weekly live, one-hour, provocative sports talk show 4:30 p.m. EST on ESPN. The program originates from Los Angeles and features opinion, Rome’s “rants,” debate and guest appearances by some of the biggest name in sports.

Jim and his wife Janet are the parents of two young sons and future U.S. World Cup soccer stars, Jake and Logan


The Jungle Party platform:

Who needs a platform?  J-Stew is screening your calls.  "HEH HEH HEH HEHHH!!! You always say that!"  Step it up.  Come strong.  Have a take.  Don't suck.  But to ensure that Patria will be racked and not run in the micronational Jungle, the Clones do have a vision for Patria in the 48th Congress:

• More Jim Rome radio affiliates in Patria, along with the flagship PMBC (1152 AM) in Castoropolis.
  
• A Castoropolis Tour Stop - one that will last at least four years, with Van Smack as a Congressman!
• Tax cuts for males 30 years of age or over who are minimally employed and living with their parents, usually in the basement.
• Straight-talking government, with no bureaucratese obfuscation or clichés:  "The golf course looks good.  My golf swing feels good.  I like my chances" - Eldrick.
• No more pear-shaped losers in Patria.
  
• Correct pronunciation of proper names, e.g. Syracuse University basketball coach Jim BO-heem and Duke's Mike Kri-ZEW-ski.
• Establishment of a Merkur Club of Patria, for anyone unfortunate enough to own an Edsel...ERRRRRR!!! XR4TI.
• For Patria to run its smack: a tri-lingual (English, Sanskrit, Patrienish) version of the Smack-Off.
• Zero tolerance for any sports figures caught doing tree/broccoli/hippie lettuce or burning heaters.
  
• Fighting impaired driving with the Jim Rome Drunk Bus, to be made available to anyone in Patria who has had too much to drink by calling 1-800-BLEAHHH!!
  
• A good dose of Jungle Karma for the Patrienish Hockey League (WAR! Castoropolis Centurions returning to the playoffs in 2007!), Castorian League and Lazurian League baseball, and even the All-Patria Football Federation - gotta love soccer! :)

Jungle Party caucus in the 48th Congress:

The Jungle Party won 12 seats in the 48th Congressus Patriaë.  Jim "Van Smack" Rome and Jason "Mr. Automatic" Stewart  will hold two of the seats, representing the Federal District of Castoropolis.  As a result of the Smack-Off  held on May 5, 2006, the Jungle Party's ten other seats will be awarded to the top ten Smack-talkers as follows:

• Jeff in Richmond (representing the Precinct of Fredonia)
• Jeff on a car phone in Phoenix (Haldimania)
• Stevie Carbone from Loyola Marymount (Canardiere)
• Bill in Knoxville (Antioch)
• Terrence in Sierra Madre (Aeolia)
• Rachel in Houston (Caesarea)
• Iafrate (Centralia)
• Joe in the O.C. (Caesarea)
• Greg in Vegas (Nova Columbia)
• Shonny "Boom goes the dynamite!" the Cablinasian (Lazuria)

Some of the other Clones who didn't make the party list, such as Silk Bra in Huntington Beach, Oren in Denver, John in C-Town, Justin in Boise, Oliver in St. Louis, Gino in San Antonio, and Casey in Vegas will sit in Precinct legislatures (the Jungle Party also won seats in the Caesarea, Lazuria and Antioch precinct assemblies) where they will hone their smack skills in the hope of an invite to the Big Dance in 2010.

THANK YOU, CLONES! ROME SAYS NO TO XM & SIRIUS!
On July 11, 2006 Jim Rome was pleased to announce he had agreed to a multi-year deal with Premiere Radio Networks that will keep the show on free terrestrial radio for a long time to come. An overwhelming groundswell of support from the Clones in the U.S, Canada and Patria helped Romey Van Smack decide to remain on free AM and FM radio, rather than move to pay-to-listen satellite radio, or leave radio entirely.