A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day ...30,000 to a man's 15,000. The wife replied, The reason has to be because a woman has to say everything twice. The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time." The wife responded, "Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
A young man was sitting in class when the professor asked him if he knew what the Roe vs. Wade decision was. He sat quietly, pondering this very profound question. Finally, after giving it a lot of thought, he sighed and said, "I think this was the decision George Washington made prior to crossing the Delaware."
The worst airline disaster in Poland's history occurred today when a two-seater Cessna crashed into a cemetery early this afternoon. Rescue workers have so far uncovered 826 bodies and expect to find more as the digging continues.
Two Arabs are chatting. One of them has his wallet out and is flipping through pictures. Proudly, he pulls two out to show his friend. "This is my oldest son. He's a martyr. And here is my second son. He's a martyr, too." There's a pause, and the second Arab says wistfully, "Ah, they blow up so fast, don't they?"
"You're so beautiful." Women love to hear that, especially when they're all distressed from crying. When they're at their worse state, with mascara streaming down their face, when they do not look at all attractive, and a guy says they're beautiful, they will remember that. When a guy is being a jerk or just a plain schmuck, they will remember how touching that moment was. They will remember the gentleness and thoughtfulness that was shown; even though it might have been twenty years ago, but they will remember, and they will forgive. Isn't it nice? How a simple little phrase will mean so much to a woman?
Black and White. That's what everyone always says. As simple as black and white. Yet how simple can those two things truly be? Black... pure black... blinding black... evil in nature; I disagree. White... awesome white... blinding white... pureness; again, I disagree. What is black but the absence of light, whereas white is the presence of light. Neither element is truly a color and therefore cannot exist in nature alone. For black, in it's natural state, would leave room for nothing but itself. White, also, sightless in itself, leaves no room. Thus is why we live in a world of color. For black and white, good and evil, neither can hold reign over everything, or everything would be gone. Yet in the sky, do we not find the black of night? In that same sky, can we not find the white wings of a dove? What of the little white kitten chasing after the small black mouse? Yet none of these things are pure or evil in and out of themselves. They are both, because life is both. The good and the bad. The light and the dark. Black and White. -ChibiJ from ariasink.com
God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time ~ Robin Williams
"If the only way for me to be with you is in my dreams then let me dream on forever..."
Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe him, but if he tells you that a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?
When I die, I want to die like my grandmother, who died peacefully in her sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in her car.
If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof overhead and a place to sleep...you are richer than 75% of this world.------ If you can attend a church meeting without fear of harassment, arrest, torture, or death...you are more blessed than three billion people in the world.-----
Should I smile because I'm your friend, or cry- because that's all we'll ever be?
I don't know if I love you or like you, want you or need you but all I know is I love the feeling I get when I'm around you.
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