| Chapter Three Accepting Changes |
| "I won't stay there," Wendy said in a quiet voice, as she looked down at the floor of the car and played with the hem of her shirt. "Oh yes you will, my dear. Because if you don't, you will find yourself back in front of the Judge, then in juvenile hall until you are eighteen. Is that what you want? “No!” “Listen Wendy. I know all of this has been hard on you, but give Barrington Hall a chance. In a few weeks you won't want to leave, I promise you that. You just have to stay in one place long enough before you decide if it’s working," she said. You’re a very lucky little girl to have gotten into Barrington Hall." Wendy sat silent as they drove through the city. She stared out of the car window as they drove along the freeway. As they drove further and further away from the life that she had always known, she couldn't help but feel sorry for herself and the hand that life had dealt her. What had she done to deserve all of this. She had never given her grandmother any worry, yet she died and left her. Left her to deal with all of this, and all of these people who thought they knew what was best for her. They knew nothing. Wendy just knew these people were stuck and they had no choice but to deal with her. Wendy closed her eyes, thinking that if she wished hard enough, this would all go away. "Wendy, Wake up!, Mrs. Wilkins said. Wendy sat up, focused her eyes, and looked around. "Where are we? she asked. "Well, we are in a little town just off the freeway. We have been driving for three hours now and I need something to eat. You took quite a nap. How do you feel?” "I'm starving," Wendy replied. "Let’s go into that cafe over there, and as long as you promise to behave, we will stay and eat.” "I promise,” she replied. When Wendy’s feet touched the ground, It felt so good to get out of the car. It also felt good to eat something. While they were eating, Mrs. Wilkins tried to tell Wendy a little about Barrington Hall. “I still don’t want to go there,” Wendy cried. “It really is a great place, though It will be an adjustment for you, and you will have to learn to accept thing the way they are. In no time you will be glad to be there. Besides, you really don’t have much of a choice. It’s either Juvenile hall or Barrington Hall.” Wendy finished the rest of her lunch without speaking to Mrs. Wilkins. She knew she might not have a choice in where she was being taken, but she did have a choice in whether she spoke. Mrs. Wilkins paid for their lunches, then they continued headed on their journey. "How much further is it?” Wendy asked. "We will be there in a couple hours," she replied. I will come see you in a few weeks, but for now I have to entrust you to them completely. I should have asked the courts to send you to Barrington Hall in the beginning. You are a good girl and have a very kind heart. We just need to let you find it again. It will be tough and they have rules there. Please try to behave and follow them." Wendy listened carefully. Maybe Mrs. Wilkins did care about her after all. Still, Wendy thought it was mean of her to make her go so far from all that she had known. As they pulled off of the freeway and headed into the country, Wendy started taking in the country side. It looked so peaceful and Wendy found it hard to believe people actually lived this far from the city. They drove for about thirty minutes before they entered a little town. The sign said Jacksonville. Population 1,860. “Does that number mean how many people live here?“ “It sure does,“ Mrs. Wilkins answered. “It sure isn't much to look at,” Wendy said. “How far is it until we get there?” “Just a little further,” she replied. Wendy wiggled in the front seat and continued to stare out the window of the car. Mrs. Wilkins drove through the town, and back out into the country. Wendy caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. Her face carried a frown and her heart felt heavy. This place seemed so far away from anything real. They hadn't gone to far from town, when Mrs. Wilkins pulled off the main road and started driving down a small narrow country road. Soon Wendy could see a very large old building through the trees. It looked interesting, but at the same time it Wendy’s stomach tightened with fear. The city felt lifetimes away, but somehow she would have to figure out how to accept this place. She wondered if she would be locked in her room like at the other place. Sure no one would care about her here, and being so far away from home, She felt like crying. but she didn't want Mrs. Wilkins to think she was a sissy. She just had to be tough and not let anyone know. As they drove down the long road toward the building, Wendy could see several smaller buildings surrounding the main one. As they drove into the parking lot, Wendy could see an old church covered in rock. The windows looked like painted glass with people covering them just like some of the churches in the city. Wendy noticed that there were only a few cars and she didn't see any other kids. It was just how she thought, all locked away like criminals. No one would ever know about her at this place. "I don't want to stay here," she said as she got out of the car. "I don't even have any of my stuff here." "I will get your things and have them sent to you, but we need to get going. We are late," she replied as they started walking toward the main building. The buildings looked very old and were made of brick. Gray ugly brick. Wendy wasn't in any hurry to get inside, so she lagged behind. walking as slow as she could while kicking the leaves that lay in the parking lot. "I wish I could just disappear," she whispered to herself. "Wendy! come on child.” As they entered the building, Wendy had to blink her eyes a few times to adjust to the light. The halls were wide and long. The floors were made of dark oak plank flooring and as Wendy walked down the hall, the boards made a creaking sound under her. The walls were painted a soft white and all the doors that lined the hall were of dark oak, just like the flooring. Wendy had never seen anything so nice and she felt like she had stepped into a mansion. Wendy reached up and took hold of Mrs. Wilkins hand. “I’m Mrs. Wilkins from social services. We have an appointment with a Mr. Parker.” she said as she glanced at the paper in her hand. “Oh yes. He is expecting you. Won’t you have a seat and I will tell him you’re here.” Wendy and Mrs. Wilkins took a seat on a long wooden bench across the hall from the lady’s desk. Wendy looked all around and down the hall. She could hear footsteps on the floor above her and the sounds of giggles echoed through the hall. Wendy leaned forward and stared down the hall just in time to see some children run past. They were to far away to tell, but they seemed as if they might have been happy. One thing for sure, they weren’t locked in any rooms. Wendy started to feel a little better. “Mr. Parker will be with you in just a moment.” the lady said as she hung up her phone and returned to her work. Wendy watched as a very tall man came through the door and stopped briefly to speak to the secretary. He had on black shoes that you could see yourself in and the suit he wore, matched in color. To Wendy he looked like one of the lawyers she had seen while in court. His stern and solemn expression frightened Wendy. “Please forgive me for making you wait Mrs. Wilkins.” He reached out and shook her hand. "Hello Wendy, he said as he looked down at her. “We have been waiting for you. My name is Mr. Parker.” "Well I could wait forever, and I don't want to be here," she said in a quivering voice. Mr. Parker straightened his posture but gave Wendy a disapproving look “Shall we step into my office and chat for a minute?“ Mrs. Wilkins took hold of Wendy’s hand and followed Mr. Parker. They walked across the hall and entered through a rather large door. Inside, Mr. Parker took a seat behind the largest and tallest desk Wendy had ever seen. She took a seat in the chair next to Mrs. Wilkins. Wendy noticed a small step stool resting against the desk just in front of her on the floor. She thought that seemed to be a strange place for a step stool. “It’s been a very long day and I would like to head back soon. I have some papers from the courts. I just need your signature and Wendy is yours.” Mrs. Wilkins handed Mr. Parker the file. He picked up a pen and thumbed through the papers. Wendy watched as he scribbled his name, then placed the papers back into the file. “I will have my secretary make copies for Wendy’s file. Wendy studied the room while they two adults chatted. There were all kinds of certificates in frames and they were hanging all over the walls. Wendy figured he must be a very smart man to have all of those awards. When Wendy heard Mrs. Wilkins say she needed to head back, Wendy’s heart jumped a beat. Mrs. Wilkins actually intended on leaving her here in the forgotten place. She wanted to jump up and grab Mrs. Wilkins arm. She wanted to beg her to take her away from here, but something about this place calmed her. She couldn’t explain it. For some reason she felt safe here. Mr. Parker shook Mrs. Wilkins hand then walked her to the office door. Wendy sat in the chair trying her hardest not to cry. “Shall we walk Mrs. Wilkins out Wendy?” he asked. Mr. Parker held out his hand. Wendy managed to get to her feet, but instead of taking Mr. Parkers hand, she reached for Mrs. Wilkins. Together they walked to the front steps. Mrs. Wilkins reassured Wendy that everything would be ok and to behave herself. "Goodbye Wendy, I will come see you in a few weeks," she said as she turned to leave. Wendy stood on the steps of Barrington Hall and watched the only connection to the outside world walk away and leave her forever. As the roar of Mrs. Wilkins car faded from Wendy’s ears, tears ran down her cheeks. She could feel Mr. Parker standing on the steps behind her. The only other men she had ever dealt with, were ones that were cruel. She wondered just what kind of a man Mr. Parker would be. Suddenly Wendy felt a gentle hand touch her shoulder. “We’re glad you're here Wendy and one day you will be happy again. Look around you sweetheart, it's very nice out here," he said as he took hold of Wendy's shoulders and turned her to look at the beautiful view of the countryside. "If you go to the hill on the other side of the church on a clear day, you can even see the mountain range from here. It is very beautiful. Mr. Parker reached out his hand, Wendy hesitated. She wanted to take his hand and trust him. She started to, but something inside her kept her from doing so. No one but her grandmother ever loved her. No one had ever cared about her. Wendy felt she was being punished and hidden from the rest of the world. "Come with me young lady, Let’s get you acquainted with your new surroundings.” Wendy wiped the tears from her eyes, took a deep breath and walked back into the building with Mr. Parker. "I know how you are feeling about coming here. Probably a little scared, but all will be ok.” he said. Wendy walked with Mr. Parker as they walked down the long hall toward some stairs. As they climbed the stairs, Wendy looked up as she heard some light footsteps on the stairs above her. She heard some girls giggle, but as they approached the top and the girls came around the corner, their giggles subsided. They stood on the landing just at the top before the second set of stairs started upwards. “Good afternoon Mr. Parker,” the girls said “Good afternoon girls. I trust you’re behaving and not running on the stairs or in the halls.” Wendy watched as all three of the girls looked down at the floor. She looked up at Mr. Parker. The girls seemed a little intimidated by his stern demeanor. She also noticed the girls were all dressed in uniforms. Navy blue jumpers, with white blouses. They had on white tights and navy blue shoes that buckled on the sides. They even had on little blue ties that crossed close to the neck. Wendy decided she wasn’t going to wear one of those uniforms no matter what they said. “If you need to be reminded again, we will be visiting my office.” Mr. Parker warned. Wendy watched the girls eyes widen at the warning. Wendy wondered what Mr. Parker meant. “Girls. You may walk down the stairs now.” Mr. Parker continued with Wendy, up the stairs. “Here at Barrington Hall, Children are expected to show obedience. Disrespect of any kind is not tolerated from any child. I am a strict but fair man and so is Mr. Johnson. He is the one in charge of you while you’re here. I know you are familiar with foster parents and Mr. Johnson is in a sense, your foster parent. Girls live in this wing on these three floors. The boys live in another wing on the other side of the building. You are not allowed in the boys wing and they aren’t allowed over here. That rule must never be broken. Do you understand Wendy?” “Wendy shook her head yes. They had walked past several doors. Mr. Parker stopped in front of a door that was near the end of the hall on the left side of the building. Mr. Parker opened the door and led Wendy into the room. "Wendy," he said as he turned her toward him. "I know this is a lot to accept in one day, so I thought that maybe this would be better for you. This is your room, and that is your bed. You do have a room mate, so please don't touch her things. It is her turn to help with dinner, so you have the room to yourself. Get acquainted with your surroundings. I have a lot of paper work that I need to do before dinner, but if you need me you can find me in my office. I will come check on you later and then introduce you to your new foster father Mr. Johnson.” Mr. Parker leaned down and gave Wendy a kiss on the top of her head. “Welcome to Barrington Hall Wendy.” As soon as he left, Wendy threw herself on her bed and buried her face in her pillow. She cried quietly on the outside, but on the inside she was screaming and cussing. She hated everyone for ruining her life. While she lay there on her bed, she contemplated just how she was going to get out of this terrible prison for thrown away children. Wendy finally succumbed to tears and exhaustion. As she drifted, she thought of tomorrow. She would figure a way to get out of this terrible place |
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