The Bigmac Files
Profiles of people in the Files

McFlurry - Zany, not wise, mad in the head - call him what you like, McFlurry is entertainment (of the slightly bizarre, gormless, kind) personified.

Hot Fudge Sundae - A lot more intelligent than his behaviour would lead you to believe.

Hotdog - If maybe not the most reliable of characters, certainly one of the ones who can make any dreary day sunny.  Hotdog, although I haven't known him well for more than a year-and-a-bit, is definitely someone interesting to know.

Large Chip (on his shoulder) - It's true, it's true.  If we're not arguing about soccer, there's always something else. Sometimes its light-hearted - often not. Chalk and Cheese, Chalk and Cheese.

Chicken McNugget (Editor) - Better be nice about this one.  McNugget is the sensible one in conversations - dare I say it,  the mother figure? - who always makes sure me and large chip don't kill each other (but doesn't mind light roastings over an open fire).  She can generally be relied upon to keep the peace, and organise people to the extreme.

Bigmac (Chief Monitor of Editors and Author) -
I'd like to think of myself as quite an unreliable, selfish bag of nerves who, if there was a really bad lightning storm, would stand on top of a hill in a bath of water, wearing a copper suit of armour and calling Zeus a dozy old git who couldn't throw a lightning bolt in a straight line if his life depended on it.  I might even throw in that I've been chatting up several of his wives for a while. It's brutal, but it's the truth. The sad and lonely truth.
(by the Author)

Others
McCurry - A friend of mine, who often appears in conversations, but does not have the internet.

McWoof - Hotdawg's older cousin

McWWFfan - Guy from school
Introduction
In 2001, I took the step of being an idiot - I changed my internet chat name to Bigmac. Originally, I claimed it was a bet, when in fact, it was purely a product of my own wild imagination.  A few months later, there was a sequel.  Then, in a blaze of glory on the 13th of June, I began the official recording. Many of the names featured are either chat names or have been used by kind permission of their owners. I only hope that these conversations (ranging from mad to zany to just plain weird from the 13th of June to the 31st of July) will be as enlightening insight for you as it was to this 14 year old.
The Author, 13th June 2001
At Home. (funnily enough)

Editors Note
While working with the author over the past time I have learnt that behind those less than witty comments, sarcastic remarks and rude words on the verge of swearing which I have endured, there really is the kind of guy you would expect.   I was the one who supposedly brought to a close the bigmac files era by threatening legal action if it was published without my editorial advice.  Wisely, the author eventually decided that my help was essential to the work.  So it is with no pride whatsoever, and little sense of accomplishment, that I sadly acknowledge the part I have played in this collection.  If anyone has any issue with anything contained in the "Bigmac Files" please feel free to blame the Mac himself and sort it out with him.

Note on symbols, emoticons, originality, etc….
More often than not, gaps will appear in conversations. In the original, this is where symbols appeared, such as, if I entered ':P', the computer would convert it to a smiley face, and so on. As all these conversations are COMPLETELY unchanged (I even left in the spelling errors for that 'authentic' feel), these gaps will appear, but don't worry - you aren't being ripped off by the publisher, just me.

The E-fed
Again and again and again, there will be references to "the e-fed". The e-fed is actually the Extreme World Championship Wrestling e-Federation, a wrestling game on the Internet which I run.  (Publicity stunt - the site is http://www.oocities.org/wwfbetrayal is you're interested.
And so onwards....