Flowers in the Desert from freedrama.com

FLOWERS IN THE DESERT

D. M. Bocaz-Larson

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Cast of Characters

JAMIE - A teen-age girl who has run from a confflict at home to stay with her Aunt Betty (MA) in order to have some time to think things out.

SAM - A fun loving teen-age girl who likes to be on top of things. She has a mischievous spirit and loves to joke around. She is madly in love with the neighbor boy (JIMMY).

SARGE - A veteran of the Vietnam War who is in charge of a group home for troubled girls. He is kind hearted but quite firm when things get out of hand.

MA - A strong willed woman who is always in command of every situation. She is loving and keeps things running smoothly, most of the time.

PAULA - A simple teen-age girl who is very enthhusiastic about religion and wants to help both people and animals. She tries to be a guiding light and a good example to others but her reasoning ability is sometimes impaired.

SHELLY - A self-declared teen-age beauty queen wwho appears very in love with herself on the outside, yet feels quite different on the inside.

TINA - An angry teen-age girl who finds reasonns to hate everyone. She is good friends with Shelly but doesn't let anyone else get close to her.

CONNIE - Jamie's mother

TOM - Connie's boyfriend

Time and Place

Present day New Mexico. A remote group home for girls.

Prologue

(A light comes up on a small area of the stage R

where SHELLY sits alone doing her hair and looking

in a hand mirror)

SHELLY

Beauty and perfection. That's what you are Miss Shelly. Bet those boys back home would be doing a quite a bit of howling if they saw you now. Look at all the wonderful things time has done to you.

(Lowers mirror)

And when I get to Hollywood and become a star, they'll wonder where this goddess came from. But my past will be a mystery, because life before this moment ain't worth telling about. After those early years things have only gotten better. Actually I'll bet being born was one of the biggest let-downs of all. I spent all that time wrapped up in that little space in my mama, and for what? I pop out and look around, screaming, wondering if this was such a good idea. Wondering why someone didn't tell me sooner what it was gonna be like those first few years, 'cause if someone had told me, I don't think I woulda come out.

(The light R fades as a light L comes up on PAULA

who sits with a baby animal)

PAULA

I've always loved taking care of animals. Horses, cats, dogs, and especially pigs. That's what one of my foster mothers used to call me, her little piggy. And I did look like a little piggy that's for sure. I was plumper than a Buddha doll.

(Smiles, then looks thoughtful)

She was the best foster mother I ever had until she got sick. Too sick for me to take care of anymore. But I sure know how to take care of animals. I'm like St. Francis of A-sissy.

(Sighs)

I would sure love to be a saint like Francis, then all this suffering would be worth while.

(The light fades and comes up R on TINA)

TINA

I watch TV and see those happy families with the little baby who's takin' its first steps or saying its first word. Them folks make such a big deal out of those things. They laugh, they cry... all 'cause they love their little hairless baboon.

(Pause. Grows sad)

And I sit there all that time and wonder... who was there when I took my first step? Who was there when I said my first word?

(Pause)

I doubt if my first word was mama or papa. I'm sure it was four letters though.

(She chuckles a little, then sighs)

But who really cares anyway.

(The light fades on come up L on SAMANTHA kissing

JIMMY. They stop as light comes on and JIMMY

takes off. SAM is smiling from ear to ear)

SAMANTHA

I've always liked boys, ever since I could remember. And they've always liked me. I played post office and doctor: I loved being the patient. I was always a big hit at every birthday party, at least until I got sent home. I never meant any harm. It was always playing. And nobody has ever minded a little fun.

(The light fades on comes up on SARGE R)

SARGE

I took this job at the group home so I could help these girls like nobody helped me. Oh, I had a few people that helped me along the way, but mostly I was left to take care of myself. I wasted a lot of years being bitter and hurting other people who never did nothing to me. I figure this is my chance to make up for it all.

(Ironic smile)

But helping these girls is like trying to grow flowers in the desert and that ain't easy.

(Lights fade. Music)

ACT I

Scene 1

(Lights come up on the front of an old farm house.

The upstage area is filled with the front of the

home which includes a covered front porch and an

upstairs window. The door to the home is UC. DR

is an area of dirt intended for a garden. The

rest of the farm is off stage. PAULA is feeding

her baby pig with a bottle)

PAULA

Ain't it just the most beautiful mornin'? Ain't it just a dream? Oh, what a glorious God we have to give us such a wonderful day.

TINA

(Comes out during PAULA's opening speech)

If you start singing, I'm gonna hit you upside the head.

PAULA

Well, good morning to you too, Tina. You look nice today, doesn't she piggy?

TINA

You're so weird.

PAULA

Off to feed the rest of the animals?

TINA

(Puts on rubber boots)

Unfortunately.

PAULA

Oh, that's my favorite job.

(Baby talk to pig)

I just love feeding the little animals.

TINA

(Pokes pig)

So how's old Oscar Meyer today?

PAULA

That's not his name!

TINA

Well, it should be.

(PAULA feeds the pig more milk)

That's the way to do it, Paula. Fatten him up. He'll be ready before you know it.

PAULA

Ready for what?

TINA

(Hungry look)

Dinner.

PAULA

Hush now. You're gonna scare piggy.

TINA

(Sings as she exits R)

"Oh, I wish I had an Oscar Meyer wiener."

PAULA

(More baby talk)

Don't you pay her no mind, piggy. She's just an awful little heathen. Yes, she is.

(SARGE enters R with garden tools)

SARGE

Morning, Paula.

PAULA

Morning, Sarge. What'cha doing?

SARGE

I'm going to plant me some flowers right over there.

(Points DR)

PAULA

Well, may God bless your flowers.

(SARGE goes DR, puts on some headphones, turns on

his portable stereo, and begins work)

TINA

(Reenters R)

Hey, Sarge. Where's...

(Sees SARGE)

What's he doing?

PAULA

Planting flowers.

TINA

In a desert?

(Yells)

It'll never work, Sarge!

PAULA

He can't hear you.

(Points to ears)

Headphones.

TINA

I know that.

PAULA

Then why'd you yell?

TINA

Cause I felt like it, okay? You got a problem with that?

PAULA

No, we don't have a problem, do we piggy?

TINA

That's debatable.

(Looks around)

Where's Ma?

PAULA

(SHELLY comes out of the house)

She went to town to pick up her niece or nephew or someone like that.

SHELLY

(Smiles)

I hope it's a nephew.

PAULA

How come?

(SHELLY puts on her sunglasses and leans on the

porch railing. She lets the morning sun caress

her, trying to look like a movie star)

TINA

Why do you ask so many dumb questions?

(PAULA doesn't answer)

When's breakfast going to be? I'm hungry.

PAULA

You slept right through it. We ate before Ma left.

TINA

What?

PAULA

Ma told us to get up early today.

TINA

How come nobody woke me up?

SHELLY

We tried, honey, but you wouldn't budge.

PAULA

Besides, a little fasting always does a person some good.

TINA

Fasting? Are you saying I'm fat or something?

PAULA

No!

TINA

You better not be saying that or I'll bash your face in.

(Gives PAULA another dirty look and exits R)

PAULA

(To pig)

I guess she got up on the wrong side of the trough. She just ain't morning people like us. Isn't that right, piggy?

SHELLY

(Looking at her clothes)

Paula? Does this color look good on me? I thought it was pink in the store but now it looks sort of purple. Oh, but I do like the style of it. It shows off my finer qualities. I guess the color really doesn't matter quite so much then does it?

(Very happy)

I can make even a simple little blouse look good, can't I?

(Exits back inside)

PAULA

It looked pink to me. Maybe she'll let me borrow it sometime.

(Baby talk)

Cause pink is our favorite color, ain't it piggy?

(Sad)

Boy, I wish I was as pretty as Shelly.

(Baby talk as she gets up and heads R)

But I guess piggies shouldn't try to be petunias.

(Exits R)

SAM

(Off)

Come and get me, Jimmy boy!

(Runs on and is followed by JIMMY)

JIMMY

Why won't you hold still?

SAM

What's the matter? You too slow?

JIMMY

(Points)

Hey, what's Sarge doing?

SAM

(Looks)

I don't know.

JIMMY

(Grabs her)

Got ya'.

SAM

Not fair!

(Audience can tell SARGE is aware of SAM and JIMMY

but SARGE doesn't let them know)

JIMMY

Now for my kiss.

SAM

Not in front of Sarge.

JIMMY

I don't care about Sarge.

SAM

You will when you're dead.

(Pushes him away)

JIMMY

Just one little kiss?

SAM

(Pretending to be prissy)

Sorry, I'm not that kind of girl.

JIMMY

Yeah, right.

(Off L)

Here it is, Jamie. Do you need any help with your bags?

JAMIE

(Off L)

No, I got them.

SAM

It's Ma. You'd better get going.

JIMMY

(Looks L)

Who's the new girl with Ma? She's kind of cute.

SAM

(Punches him)

Hey, you watch yourself.

JIMMY

What are you going to do about it?

SAM

Will you get out of here?

JIMMY

You gonna make me?

(SAM grabs JIMMY's ear and drags him off R. SARGE

snickers quietly to himself)

Ow. Ow.

(Enters L with JAMIE)

We're still in the process of fixing it up.

JAMIE

(Being polite)

It's nice.

Not really. But once we put some time into it, we'll get it looking pretty good.

JAMIE

I see.

Here. Let me take your bags inside for you.

(Takes her bag)

JAMIE

Thank you.

I'll put your bag in my room for now. Did you bring anything valuable?

JAMIE

Huh?

I like to believe the best about our girls here at the group home, but sometimes nice things tempt them and those nice things disappear.

JAMIE

(Nervous)

No, I don't think I have anything like that.

Sorry, Jamie. I don't mean to scare you. They're really nice girls once you get to know them. Some of them have pretty rough edges but after time you'll see how neat they can be.

SHELLY

Ma!

(Holds up a scarf)

Look what Paula did to my new scarf! It looks like she dropped it in cow manure!

Now, Shelly. Calm down.

(Takes scarf with two cautious finger)

It should wash out.

SHELLY

I could kill her. I could just kill her.

(Exits inside)

I better take care of this before it turns into another Pearl Harbor.

(Points DR)

Go say hi to your Uncle Joe and ask him to introduce you to some of the girls.

JAMIE

(Very nervous)

How many girls are there in your group home?

(Smiles)

Only four.

(As she exits into house)

Relax, Jamie. Everything will be fine.

JAMIE

(Goes to SARGE and taps him on the shoulder)

Uncle Joe?

SARGE

(Takes off headphone)

Well, hey there, Jammer? I heard you were coming. How's my favorite niece?

JAMIE

Okay, I guess.

SARGE

Just okay, huh? Something eating you?

JAMIE

Not really.

(Looking around nervously)

SARGE

(Looks around too. Whispers)

What you looking for?

JAMIE

Huh? Oh, nothing.

SARGE

Nervous about meeting the girls?

JAMIE

(Gives a "how did you read my mind" look)

Uh... no.

SARGE

(Responding to her actions rather than words)

Don't worry. They're nice girls if you give them half a chance.

(Looks around)

Have you met any of them yet?

JAMIE

No, but it's okay. I can meet them later. There's no hurry.

SARGE

I should get at least one of them to show you around.

JAMIE

I'm kind of a loner. I can find my way around.

SARGE

(Takes a good look at her)

Is something wrong? You seem a lot different from the last time I saw you.

JAMIE

It's been awhile.

SARGE

Not that long. Is something wrong?

JAMIE

I don't really want to talk about it, okay Uncle Joe?

SARGE

(Knowing when to back off)

Okay.

(Looks off R)

Oh, good. Here comes Sam.

JAMIE

I better go inside and unpack.

SARGE

(Gently grabs JAMIE)

Sam, come over here. I want to introduce you.

SAM

(Enters R)

I kinda got something else to do, Sarge.

SARGE

Like what?

SAM

Never mind.

SARGE

Jamie. Meet Samantha.

SAM

Don't call me that name. You know I hate that.

SARGE

Sorry Sandpaper.

SAM

I don't think I like my nickname much better.

(Goes to JAMIE. Looks at SARGE)

My friends call me Sam.

(Looks over JAMIE)

What are you in for?

SARGE

Sam! You know better than to talk like that.

SAM

Sorry.

SARGE

She's our niece. She's here for a visit.

SAM

Why?

SARGE

Some people actually like to come see us.

SAM

(Sly look at SARGE)

I don't see why.

(SARGE rolls his eyes but smiles)

Does she talk?

JAMIE

Yes.

SAM

Well, she knows one word.

JAMIE

(Getting upset)

Can I go inside now, Sarge?

SARGE

(Gives SAM an annoyed look)

Sure, Jamie.

(JAMIE goes quickly inside)

What was that all about?

SAM

What do you mean?

SARGE

Why did you go and pick on her like that?

SAM

(Looks away)

I wasn't...

SARGE

Yes, you were. And you're going to make up for it.

SAM

How?

SARGE

You're going to become Jamie's best pal while she's here.

SAM

But Sarge...

SARGE

She can even stay in your room.

SAM

What? Roommates with Shelly AND the geekazoid?

SARGE

No. I will give in on that point. Shelly will move in with Tina. And if you're nice to Jamie the whole time she's here then Shelly stays with Tina when Jamie leaves.

SAM

What if Jamie never goes?

SARGE

She won't be staying that long.

SAM

Oh, that's right. She has a family to go home to.

SARGE

Just a mother.

SAM

That's more than I have.

SARGE

Will you do it?

SAM

(Pause. Thinks about it)

Sure. Why not? Anything to get rid of Shelly.

SARGE

(Tries to give SAM a hug)

You're a good kid, Sandpaper.

SAM

(Squirms)

I know.

SARGE

After morning devotions, show her around.

SAM

Does that mean no chores?

SARGE

Don't push it, Sam.

SAM

Don't worry, I will.

(Comes out with SHELLY. MA carries a

small devotion book)

Devotion time.

SAM

Ah, do we have to do devotions every morning? Even God took a rest once in a while.

Do you have to complain about it every morning? You know we always do them.

(To SHELLY)

Would you go get Paula and Tina?

SHELLY

Out in the barn? But I'm not dressed for it.

SARGE

And why aren't you? You have barn duty today.

SHELLY

I do? Are you sure?

SARGE

I'm sure.

SAM

She knows she has barn duty. She just wanted to show off her new clothes.

SHELLY

I did not.

SAM

Did so.

Girls. Stop. Shelly, you go change so you can do your chores right after devotions. Sam. Would you go get the others?

SAM

(Snotty look at SHELLY)

I would love to.

(SAM exits R)

And Shelly? Could you ask Jamie to come out too?

(SHELLY nods and exits through UC door)

Sometimes, those girls...

SARGE

Probably having someone new around is setting them off.

And Jamie was acting really upset when she came in. What happened out here?

SARGE

Sam was giving her a hard time. I took care of it.

I hope so because something is really bothering Jamie and I want her to feel like this is a safe enough place to talk about it.

SARGE

Her visit sure came out of the blue. Did your sister have something come up?

I haven't talked to my sister yet about it. I only talked to Jamie on the phone last night. I didn't get to talk to her mother.

SARGE

Strange.

You think so?

SARGE

Just a little.

I thought it was too, but I figure it was just me.

SARGE

Has she told you anything out of the ordinary yet?

No, she simply said she wanted to visit and I've left it at that.

SARGE

I guess that could be all there is to it.

(Joking)

This is such a wonderful vacation spot.

It is if you like rattlesnakes.

SAM

They're coming.

TINA

(Off. Sings)

"I wish I had an Oscar Meyer wiener."

PAULA

(Carrying on Pig)

I don't hear you.

TINA

(Comes on)

Here, piggy, piggy. Time for dinner.

PAULA

It is not.

Paula, will you please leave that pig in the barn? It's not a baby.

PAULA

Yes, it is. It's my baby.

TINA

You know, she’s right. They even look alike.

PAULA

Can't piggy at least stay for devotions?

SAM

What for? Animals don't have souls.

PAULA

They do too.

SAM

Do not.

PAULA

How would you know?

SAM

I live with enough of them.

TINA

Are you calling me an animal?

SAM

If the feed bag fits...

(Looks through book)

Maybe we need an extra long devotion today.

SAM

(SAM straightens up)

No, that's okay. Sorry, Tina.

TINA

You better be.

PAULA

(Pouting)

I'll go put piggy back.

(Exits R)

Sam. Would you get Shelly now?

SAM

(Yells)

HEY, SHELLY! GET OUT HERE NOW!

That's not quite what I had in mind.

(SHELLY and JAMIE come out)

SAM

See it worked.

SHELLY

We were almost out here anyway. Sorry I took so long.

(Smiles at JAMIE)

Jamie and I were just getting to know each other.

Everyone come sit down. Sarge? Would you read this morning?

SARGE

(Takes book)

Sure.

SHELLY

(Whispers to JAMIE)

This should take forever.

(Hears her)

Do you want to read?

(SHELLY looks away)

Go ahead, Sarge.

SARGE

"In death, we find life."

SAM

Cheery title.

Sh.

SARGE

(Reads with difficulty)

"In everyday living, we... encounter... difficult... situations. We... struggle with the ups and downs of day to day living and sometimes we get so... overwhelmed we want it all to end. Nothing seems to go right for us and we feel like it never will. Some people see death as the answer. And in one kind of death you can find a way out."

SHELLY

What's that again?

Oh, good. You girls do listen.

SARGE

"Suicide is of course the wrong way out. The kind of death we should seek is the end to our old ways of living. We should let our old ways die and seek..."

SHELLY

(Mocking)

"Eternal life in Jesus Christ." These things always end the same way.

MA
There's a reason for that, Shelly.

SHELLY

But it seems so... fake.

SAM

You're one to talk.

SHELLY

What's that supposed to mean?

SAM

Nothing.

PAULA

Be quiet you two. You're ruining a good devotion.

SHELLY

There's no such thing as a good devotion.

SARGE

Now, Shelly...

SHELLY

Oh, shut up, Sarge. Just shut up.

(Runs off R)

SARGE

(Angry)

You come back here!

(Starts after her. MA stops him)

Let me go. You calm down.

(SARGE nods. MA exits R. SARGE throws down book

and exits L)

PAULA

Sarge.

(Picks up book and dusts it off)

You didn't finish.

SAM

I don't think he wants to.

PAULA

Of course he does. I better go talk to him.

TINA

I wouldn't if I were you. He's so mad, he'll probably smack you.

PAULA

He would not.

TINA

Don't say I didn't warn you.

(Exits inside)

PAULA

Maybe I'll wait.

(Goes inside too)

JAMIE

Are things always like this around here?

SAM

(Deciding to be nice)

Yes, most of the time.

JAMIE

It must be hard.

SAM

It's better than nothing. At least we have a place to live.

JAMIE

What do you mean? People always have some place to live.

SAM

Are you sure we're living on the same planet? Haven't you heard of the homeless?

JAMIE

Yes, but they're just junkies and stuff. You never see kids homeless.

SAM

You don't get out much do you?

JAMIE

What do you mean?

SAM

Nothing.

JAMIE

No, come on. Tell me.

SAM

Okay, I'll tell you. Homeless people aren't homeless because they want to be. Homeless people are usually people that aren't wanted. Either their parents died or they left them. Oh, sure there's foster homes but they don't really want you either. If they did, why would they keep getting rid of me.

JAMIE

But you have a home.

SAM

I didn't always have a home. I lived on the streets a little while. And surprise, there were lots of kids there with me. People never thought we were homeless even though we weren't dressed nice. Kids never dress nice anyway. And sometimes we'd even get a five finger discount on something nice from a store. That's how I got caught. I hadn't been out there very long when they got me. Some kids are out there forever. They learn how to survive. I didn't.

JAMIE

Did you go to jail?

SAM

They gave me a choice. Come here or go to jail. Sarge even came down to visit with me.

(Softens)

He told me about the Happy Rancher and despite the stupid name it sounded kinda cool. And he did something most people never did for me.

JAMIE

What's that?

SAM

He asked me what I wanted. He really wanted to know what he could help me do for myself. I just broke down and cried. It seemed like I cried forever.

JAMIE

Why did you cry?

SAM

Because I'd finally found someone who cared.

(Realizes she's just spilled her guts to a

stranger and makes a total turn around)

Oh, man, what am I saying. You must think I'm a total dork.

JAMIE

No, really...

SAM

(Laughs)

Real sob story, huh? It wasn't that big of deal.

JAMIE

Sam, you don't have to put on an act for me. I'm glad you shared that with me.

SAM

Don't get all mussy on me okay.

(Looks around)

So. Do you want the grand tour?

JAMIE

(Confused about SAM's changes in attitude)

Okay.

SAM

(Points DL)

Over there is the road in. It's so long you can't hardly see the main road.

(Point L)

Over there is the garage.

(Smiles slyly)

And Jimmy's house.

JAMIE

Who's Jimmy?

SAM

He's just a real good friend of mine.

JAMIE

Oh.

SAM

(Points DR)

That's Sarge's garden.

(Points R)

Over there is the barn where Shelly's balling her eyes out.

(Points UC)

And this here is our lovely home.

JAMIE

Thanks for the tour.

SAM

No problem.

JAMIE

I wonder if Shelly's okay.

SAM

She's never okay.

JAMIE

What do you mean? She seemed pretty nice on the whole.

SAM

(Surprised)

Oh, don't tell me you fell for you little act.

(Imitates SHELLY)

"Don't you just love my hair? Ain't I just the most beautiful thing you've laid eyes on?"

(Back to self)

Don't you think she's just a little too stuck on herself?

JAMIE

Maybe just a little.

SAM

Don't worry. Old Tami Fay's true colors will show more and more as time goes on. She can only put that act on for so long. And you should try seeing Shelly without all that makeup. Now that's scary.

JAMIE

I sure didn't like the way she acted a few minutes ago though.

SAM

I know. One minute she's Miss Perfect and the next minute she's Psycho. I'm always calling her Jeckle and Heidi.

JAMIE

Here they come.

(Enters R with SHELLY)

Wait here. I'll get Sarge.

SAM

Sarge went towards the garage.

Thanks.

SAM

So Shelly, you ready to get it?

SHELLY

(Cool and calm)

I don't know what you mean.

SAM

Sarge is sure mad at you. You shouldn’t push Vietnam vets around like that you know.

(Creeps up to SHELLY)

Cause one day, you're going to push him too far.

(Tries to scare SHELLY)

And he's gonna snap!

SHELLY

(The ice queen)

Don't be silly.

(Enters with SARGE)

Okay, Shelly.

SHELLY

(Unemotional)

I'm sorry that I told you to shut up.

SARGE

(Doesn't look at SHELLY. Speaks to MA)

You'll take care of her punishment.

I will.

(To SHELLY)

See me after your chores.

(SHELLY gives a slight nod)

SARGE

(To MA)

Send the other girls out here. It's time for chores.

(MA exits into house)

Shelly, you have barn duty.

SHELLY

I knew I should have waited to do my hair. And it looks so nice today.

SARGE

You'll also want to move all your things out of Sam's room. Jamie's going to stay with her.

SHELLY

And where am I moving to?

SAM

(Mock sincerity)

I'm afraid you're going to have to stay in the barn, Shelly.

SHELLY

(Loses her cool)

What?!

SARGE

Samantha.

SAM

Sorry.

SARGE

You're moving in with Tina.

SHELLY

(Excited)

Yes.

SARGE

But after what you pulled today, I'm not sure the barn is such a bad idea.

SHELLY

I said I was sorry.

SARGE

Sometimes sorry isn't enough.

SHELLY

It never is with you.

(Exits R. SARGE retrains himself)

TINA

(From inside)

Oink! Oink!

PAULA

(Runs out)

Stop!

TINA

(Comes out)

Oink, oink, oink.

PAULA

Make her stop, Sarge.

SARGE

Tina, go finish feeding the animals and help Shelly with barn when you're done.

TINA

Oink.

(Exits R)

Oink, oink, oink.

SAM

I see Tina's getting back to her roots.

PAULA

What can I do for you today, Sarge?

SARGE

You're on garden duty.

PAULA

(In heaven)

Cultivating God's garden. I shall keep it as clean as Eden.

SAM

Before or after they ate the apple?

PAULA

I didn't hear that.

(Exits R)

SARGE

(To SAM)

You're inside today.

SAM

Okay. I'll catch you later, Jamie.

JAMIE

Bye. Thanks for the tour.

SAM

No problem.

(Exits inside)

SARGE

Are you and Sam getting along?

JAMIE

I guess so.

SARGE

It'll take time to get through all the rough stuff but she's a pretty neat kid underneath it all.

JAMIE

She seems to really like you too.

(MA comes out)

SARGE

Yeah, we do seem to get along. I wish I could say the same about Shelly.

Jamie? Could you run inside and help Sam a minute?

JAMIE

Uh, okay.

Thanks.

(JAMIE goes inside)

So how are you doing?

SARGE

Not so good. Why can't I get through to Shelly?

For the same reason I can't always get through to Sam. Some people simply get along better than others. You and Sam have a special connection I'll never have with her.

SARGE

That's fine if you get along better with Shelly than I do, but Shelly seems to out right hate me.

Sam may not hate me, but she sure tries to find ways to get under my skin. Just now she ran in the house and told me you were so fed up with Shelly that you were out here trying to drown her in the trough. She got me so worked up I ran to the window to look.

(SARGE is trying not to laugh)

Yes, she thought it was pretty funny too. Well I didn't.

SARGE

Okay, you've made your point.

Do you feel better then?

SARGE

A little. I still wish I could find out what she doesn't like about me. I mean she doesn't have to like me or anything. I just want to know what I did.

You may not have done anything. Give it time.

(SARGE nods)

I better get back inside and watch Sam. I wonder what she has up her sleeve next.

(SARGE laughs and MA exits. He puts his

headphones on and goes to his flowers. SAM comes

out to shake off a rug)

JIMMY

(Appears cautiously from UL corner of house)

Pst. Hey, Sam.

SAM

Jimmy. What are you doing here?

JIMMY

I missed you.

SAM

(Shakes off rug)

I saw you less than an hour ago.

JIMMY

I came back for my kiss.

SAM

Tough. I'm busy.

JIMMY

But I need you, Sam.

SAM

I think you'll survive.

JIMMY

Come on, Sam. You can't make a guy wait like this. It's all biological you know.

SAM

I never heard our biology teacher say anything about it.

JIMMY

Old frog eyed Ferguson doesn't know nothing about these things. I'm surprised he even knew enough to have kids.

SAM

Maybe he did it asexually.

JIMMY

A-what?

SAM

Don't you ever listen in school?

JIMMY

I musta been gone that day.

SAM

You're gone every day.

JIMMY

(Goes to her)

Just one teenie-tiny kiss?

SAM

(Shakes rug at him)

No.

(Comes out. Followed by JAMIE)

What is taking you so long?

(Sees JIMMY)

Oh, hello, Jimmy. What are doing around here today?

JIMMY

I... uh... was wondering if you had any work for me today?

SAM

Nice save.

(JIMMY gives SAM a dirty look as she exits)

You'll have to ask Sarge.

(Points at SARGE at flowerbed)

JIMMY

Thanks.

(MA exits. He looks over JAMIE)

Well, hello there. Who might you be? No wait. Let me guess your name. I'm pretty good at it. Let's see... Cindy? Candy? Mandy?

JAMIE

(Unimpressed)

It's Jamie.

JIMMY

Pretty name.

(He smiles at her)

And you're pretty too.

JAMIE

So how long have you and Sam been together?

JIMMY

Oh, come on. Let me have my fun.

JAMIE

You're not my type.

JIMMY

You're a frisky one, ain't you?

JAMIE

Frisky? Excuse me. I think I need to be some place else.

JIMMY

I'll catch you later.

(JIMMY winks. JAMIE rolls her eyes and exits into

house. JIMMY goes over to SARGE)

Howdy, Sarge!

(JIMMY's yelling makes SARGE jump)

SARGE

I don't have them on that loud, Jimmy.

JIMMY

Sorry.

SARGE

What you need?

JIMMY

Got any work for me today?

SARGE

Not that I can think of. Drop by later though. I might have you go into town with me to pick up some feed.

JIMMY

Sounds good.

(SARGE starts back to work. Pause. JIMMY thinks

then speaks)

Maybe Sam could come along. We could use the help.

SARGE

(Stops. Looks at JIMMY)

I don't know. She might be busy helping Ma.

JIMMY

That's okay. No biggie.

(Embarrasses, disappointed)

SARGE

We'll see. Sam always likes to go to town. Maybe she can run some errands for Ma.

JIMMY

(Happy)

Okay. Just let me know.

SARGE

See you, Jimmy.

(JIMMY runs off L. SARGE smiles and puts back on

headphones. SAM and JAMIE come out with a big rug

to shake out)

SAM

Shoot. I missed him.

JAMIE

Jimmy's sure is different.

SAM

He's the only male within a million miles of here, so I make do.

JAMIE

I suppose I'd get desperate too.

SAM

He's not that bad. He seems like a real jerk sometimes, but deep down there's something good. I think that's true of most people.

(Pause. Thinks)

Except maybe Shelly... and Tina... and Fred from church ain't so good... oh, well I guess maybe it's about 50-50.

JAMIE

I seems that way.

SAM

Actually Jimmy and I are getting pretty serious.

(SARGE perks up, but tries to not to listen)

JAMIE

You are?

SAM

Get a load of this?

(Holds out hand)

It's a promise ring. We're darn near engaged.

JAMIE

What do Ma and Sarge think about that?

SAM

It's none of their business.

(Looks at ring)

Do you think these are diamonds?

(Shows JAMIE)

JAMIE

(Looks close)

Where?

SAM

Next to the emerald.

JAMIE

(Trying to be nice)

Uh, I can't tell.

SAM

He says they are.

(Looks at her ring proudly)

I bet he spent a fortune on this.

(SARGE quietly chuckles)

JAMIE

I'll bet he did.

SAM

Now that I've shared all my deep dark secrets, how about telling me some of yours.

JAMIE

I don't really have any to tell.

SAM

Everyone has a story.

JAMIE

I'm afraid there's nothing to tell.

SAM

What about why you're here?

JAMIE

What do you mean?

SAM

You're not really here for just a visit, are you?

JAMIE

How did you...

(SARGE is really listening now)

SAM

I've been around Jamie. I'm not stupid.

JAMIE

I guess not.

SAM

So come on. Spill it.

JAMIE

I don't really want to talk about it.

SAM

Oh, it must be good. Let me guess. You're pregnant?

JAMIE

No!

SAM

You were caught shoplifting?

JAMIE

(Annoyed)

No, Sam. Nothing like that.

SAM

You had a bad hair day and your friends made fun of you.

JAMIE

Now you're making fun of me.

SAM

I'm sorry. I won't say another word about it. I won't even ask a question again. About anything. Anything at all.

JAMIE

Fine. Do you want to hear my big secret?

SAM

(Desperate)

Please.

JAMIE

Yesterday, I packed up my bags, hopped on a bus, and left home for good.

SAM

You ran away, huh?

JAMIE

You sound disappointed.

SAM

I was hoping for something a little more exciting.

JAMIE

I couldn't stand living there anymore. Not as long as mom stays with that jerk.

SAM

Wicked stepfather, huh?

JAMIE

Sort of. They're not married... yet.

(Comes out)

How long does it take to shake out a rug anyway? This is going to take us all day.

JAMIE

Sorry, we got to talking.

SAM

We've been sharing our darkest secrets.

Oh, dear. That doesn't sound good.

SAM

(Gets a weird look on her face)

No. It wasn't.

(JAMIE and SAM go inside)

(Shakes out a small rug)

At least they're getting along.

SARGE

(Takes off headphones)

You think those kids would learn by now.

(Goes to him)

What are you talking about?

SARGE

I heard their secrets.

(Interested)

You did?

(Realizes she's an adult)

You shouldn't listen to them like that, Joe.

SARGE

I guess you don't want to know what they said then.

I didn't say that.

SARGE

I didn't overhear anything new with Sam but Jamie did say why she's here.

She ran away because she doesn't like the man her mother is seeing.

SARGE

How do you know that?

I just called Jamie's mother. Jamie left a note for her mom telling her why she left but her mom didn't know where Jamie went.

SARGE

So much for my career as a spy.

Connie was sure glad to hear that Jamie's with us.

SARGE

I'll bet. So is Connie coming to get her?

She wanted to but I told her to give it some time. I think Jamie might come around on her own.

TINA

(Enters R)

Hey, Sarge. Can I take a break and go get the mail?

SARGE

As long as your more than half-way done. I do have other things for you to do.

TINA

I'll be done. Can I drive the truck down?

SARGE

I guess...

(Tosses her the keys)

Keep it under 30.

TINA

You're no fun.

(Exits L)

SARGE

One of these days, one of the girls is going to run off on me.

They have. Don't you remember our first year here?

SARGE

I've been trying to forget.

I swear we spent half our time chasing those girls down.

SARGE

But when your only choice is jail or here, I know where I'd be. I wish they would of had some place like this for me when I was a kid. It may've kept me out of trouble.

(Smiles and laughs)

Probably not.

SARGE

(Looks at watch)

It is about time for break, isn't it?

Maybe not for Sam though. Every time I turn around she's taking a break.

SARGE

Besides the girls will want to get their mail. Some of them really look forward to it.

Some of them look forward to it too much.

SARGE

I'll go get Paula and Shelly. Maybe I'll even surprise Shelly and finish up for her out there.

(Exits R)

And I suppose I'll get Sam.

(Exits inside)

PAULA

(Off)

Thank you, Sarge. I'm expecting some important information.

(Enters R)

I sure hope it comes today.

SAM

(Comes from house with JAMIE)

A break already? Seems like we've hardly worked at all.

JAMIE

I think we've spent most of the time talking.

SAM

(Trying to look serious and tough)

I've been working and nobody is going to know different are they? It's our little secret.

JAMIE

(Laugh)

Uh-huh, okay.

SAM

(Like a gangster)

You're a good kid. I like you. I think I'll keep you around.

SHELLY

(Enter R dirty and annoyed)

Look at me. What a mess.

(Almost in tears)

And I broke a nail too.

PAULA

(Goes to her)

Let me see. Poor, Shelly.

SHELLY

(Moves away)

I don't need your sympathy, Paula.

SAM

What Shelly needs is a demolition crew.

SHELLY

Do I look that bad?

SAM

Let's just say that Frankenstein had better hair days.

SHELLY

Oh, and I had my hair perfect today.

PAULA

Don't listen to Sam. You never look bad.

SHELLY

And what do you know, Paula. You can't even wear clothes that are color coordinated.

SAM

Man, Shelly. What did Paula ever do to you?

PAULA

It's okay, Sam. She's upset. She doesn't mean it.

TINA

(Enters L)

Speedy delivery.

PAULA

Here, let me see.

SHELLY

Did I get a letter?

TINA

Back off, girls. I'll call off the names. And if you want the letter, that will be a dollar.

PAULA

But I don't have...

SAM

She's joking, Paula.

TINA

Sure I am. If you don't have a dollar, you can wrestle me for it.

SHELLY

Hurry up, Tina.

TINA

Okay.

(Goes through mail)

A big envelope for Paula.

(PAULA reaches for it and TINA pulls away)

It's from Oral Roberts University.

SAM

Isn't he the one that asked for all that money and said God would kill him if he didn't get it?

TINA

(Still keeping it from PAULA)

The very same.

JAMIE

You're kidding. Did he get the money?

SAM

I don't know, did he?

PAULA

Yes, he did. Now give it here.

SAM

I can't believe people for stuff like that. What kind of idiot would give him money?

PAULA

I did. I didn't want him to die.

TINA

That is truly pathetic.

PAULA

Give me my mail.

TINA

I wanna look at it. What kind of classes do they offer there anyway? Con-artist 101? Money making ideas 201? Maybe I should go there to.

PAULA

They probably wouldn't let you in. They don't take mean people.

TINA

(Pretend shock)

I've been insulted. Paula actually insulted me.

SAM

Will you give Paula her stupid mail please?

SHELLY

Yeah, I want to see what I got.

(TINA gives envelope to PAULA who sits on porch

and excitedly reads it)

TINA

Let's see.

(Looks through mail)

Sarge, Ma, Sarge, Jamie.

(Holds out letter)

SAM

Jamie?

TINA

(JAMIE comes to take it)

One dollar, please.

(Smiles)

Just joking.

(Hands it over)

SAM

Who's it from?

JAMIE

My mother. How'd she know I was here?

SAM

Lucky guess?

JAMIE

Or Aunt Betty told her?

TINA

A letter for Shelly. Which boy is it this time?

SHELLY

(Grabs it)

The only boy there is.

SAM

Ew. Not Fred.

SHELLY

Freddie happens to be a very loving person.

SAM

I know that he sure loves to pick his nose. He's always up in the front row mining for gold. I wonder if he grosses out the pastor.

(TINA tries not to let SHELLY see her laugh)

SHELLY

At least my boyfriend is clean.

SAM

What is that supposed to mean?

SHELLY

I can smell Jimmy coming before I ever see him.

SAM

Oh, shut up Miss Primps-a-lot.

TINA

All right. Here's my Sci-Fi Magazine. Check this out.

(SAM and JAMIE come to look)

JAMIE

How'd they get him to look like that?

TINA

Read and find out.

SAM

I think I'll pass.

(Takes rest of mail)

How come I never get anything?

(Stops at a letter)

Hey, what's this?

JAMIE

Somebody returned a letter to Uncle Joe.

SAM

It's to Vietnam. And it's to a woman.

TINA

Let me see.

(Takes envelope)

How can you tell it's a woman? All those Asian names are alike.

PAULA

You leave that letter alone.

SAM

(Takes it back)

I wonder who it is.

PAULA

I'm gonna tell.

TINA

You tell and I'll bash in your face.

SAM

Don't worry. We won't look at it.

TINA

We won't?

SAM

See, Paula. There it goes back in the pile. All safe and sound.

PAULA

Good.

(PAULA exits inside. SAM winks at TINA and take

letter out again. She puts it inside her shirt)

SHELLY

That rat!

TINA

What is it, Shelly?

SHELLY

That dirty, stinking sorry excuse for a...

TINA

What did he say?

SHELLY

(In tears)

Look at the letter he wrote me.

TINA

"Dear Shelly, I got your letter and picture. My friends and I got a great laugh out of the letter. Thanks."

SHELLY

I want to kill him.

TINA

"Did you really think I liked you? You're cute and all but I don't think you could be my girlfriend. I'm sure you know why."

JAMIE

What does he mean by that?

SAM

He means that he doesn't want a girlfriend who lives in a group home.

JAMIE

Why not?

SAM

Cause we're not good enough, Jamie.

SHELLY

I want him dead.

JAMIE

But that's not true. There's nothing wrong with you.

SAM

Tell that to them. They seem to think so.

SHELLY

I want to cut him up into little pieces.

TINA

It gets worse.

JAMIE

It does.

SHELLY

(Sobbing)

He says I'm a fat little pig who isn't good enough to lick his feet.

TINA

And "P.S. But if you still want to meet out in the church tool shed, I wouldn't mind."

SAM

Oh, come on. What a jerk?

JAMIE

He really wrote that after what he said.

SHELLY

I thought he loved me.

(Runs inside house)

JAMIE

Shouldn't someone go talk to her?

SAM

No, leave her alone.

TINA

Ma will probably talk to her. Meanwhile I'll be thinking of a way to get back at Fred.

(Comes out)

What's wrong with, Shelly? She ran upstairs and locked herself in the bathroom.

TINA

Some guy from church wrote her a nasty letter.

Poor thing. Was it really bad?

SAM

Let's just say if Shelly killed him, I would understand.

That bad? I'll go talk to her.

TINA
Let me, Ma. Sometimes I can cheer her up.

Okay, Tina. Thank you.

(TINA exits inside)

I hope Shelly doesn't get worked up over this?

SAM

It doesn't take much.

I know, that's what worries me.

JAMIE

What are you talking about?

Nothing, Jamie. I'll be fine.

JIMMY

(Enters L)

Hey, Sam, Jamie.

(Big smile)

Howdy, Ma.

What do you need, Jimmy?

JIMMY

I was just being neighborly.

Well, don't be neighborly too long. I need Sam inside pretty soon.

SAM

What for?

Peeling potatoes.

SAM

(Whining)

Aw, Ma.

I don't want to hear it, Sam.

(Looks at watch)

Five minutes.

SAM

Yes, warden.

(MA exits)

JAMIE

I guess I better leave you two alone.

SAM

Thanks.

(JAMIE goes inside)

Howdy, sailor.

JIMMY

Now about my kiss.

(JIMMY tries to kiss SAM but SARGE enters R. SAM

pushes JIMMY away. SARGE sits in a chair on the

porch. Silence)

SARGE

Don't let me bother you. I'm just gonna do a little reading.

(Looks at a magazine)

JIMMY

Well, I guess I'll be going.

SAM

But our five minutes aren't up yet.

(SARGE looks over the edge of the magazine)

JIMMY

Yeah, but I can't do what I really want to do.

SAM

Can't we just talk?

JIMMY

That's no fun.

(Turns to go)

I'll see you later, Sam.

(Exits L)

SAM

Bye.

(Heads for house)

SARGE

That boy is a lot like I was when I was his age.

SAM

Really?

SARGE

I'm not sure that's good, Sam. There was only one thing I was interested in when it came to girls and it wasn't talking. I was a real waste of food.

SAM

But you turned out good.

SARGE

Yeah, but not before doing a lot of things I wish I hadn't.

SAM

Like what?

SARGE

Gambling, drinking, womanizing. And I'm not real proud of it either.

SAM

Oh, boys will be boys.

SARGE

And somebody shouldn't let them be. Boys get away with too much nowadays and kids like Jimmy love every minute of it. He don't see it now but it ain't worth it. You hurt too many people along the way.

SAM

Jimmy's not that bad, is he?

SARGE

I don't know, Sam, is he?

SAM

I think he's okay.

SARGE

You be careful, Sam.

SAM

I can take care of myself, Sarge. Nothing bad's gonna happen to me.

SARGE

Promise?

SAM

Don't you always say never make promises?

SARGE

Only ones you can't keep.

SAM

Well, I think I can keep this one.

SARGE

Good.

TINA

(Runs out)

SARGE!

SARGE

What is it?

TINA

Shelly's tried to kill herself again!

SARGE

(Jumps up)

Where is she?

TINA

Upstairs. In the bathroom. She cut her wrists. She's bleeding real bad.

SARGE

Go get the truck started. I'll bring her down.

(TINA exits L and SARGE goes inside. JAMIE comes

out really upset)

JAMIE

Sam. Did you hear?

SAM

(Disgusted)

Yeah, I heard. What's new?

JAMIE

What are you saying? Shelly tried to kill herself...

SAM

...for the hundredth time. She does it all the time, Jamie. It's no big thrill for me.

JAMIE

But... this is serious... how can you not care...

SAM

Sometimes people get tired of caring!

(PAULA and MA come out)

Paula. Go call the EMT in town and have her meet us at the gas station. Tell her to have an ambulance sent up too.

PAULA

Yes, Ma.

(Runs back inside)

TINA

(Enters L)

The truck's ready.

SHELLY

(SARGE carries her out. Her wrists are expertly

wrapped. She cries out despite being weak)

No, leave me alone!

SARGE

(Kindly)

Quiet down, Shelly.

SHELLY

(Struggles)

No!

(Goes to SHELLY)

Shelly, please don't fight.

(SARGE is having trouble holding SHELLY)

SHELLY

I don't want Sarge! Pig!

Shelly!

SHELLY

All you men are pigs!

Stop fighting!

SHELLY

No!

SARGE

Shelly, please. I'll only carry you to the truck.

SHELLY

Then only Ma. Please.

SARGE

Yes, Shelly. Only Ma.

(Carries her off L. MA follows. TINA, SAM, and

JAMIE stand silent a moment as car door slams and

truck speeds away)

JAMIE

(After a moment)

Will she be okay?

TINA

She didn't cut herself too bad this time. I bet she'll still have to go to the hospital though.

JAMIE

Why didn't they have the ambulance come here?

TINA

The nearest ambulance is 70 miles away. The EMT in town is the best person to go to for now.

JAMIE

(Looks off L)

Man, look at Uncle Joe. He looks really upset.

SAM

That's probably why Shelly does it.

TINA

Shut up, Sam. You don't know what you're talking about.

SAM

What's the matter? Did I insult your girlfriend?

TINA

(Pushes Sam)

You wanna fight.

(Pushes again)

I'll fight you.

(SAM tackles TINA and they fight)

JAMIE

Sarge!

SARGE

(Runs in and grabs them)

All right, break it up!

(Pushes them apart)

Okay, who started it?

(They're silent)

Sam, go upstairs.

SAM

What? Why only me?

SARGE

Don't argue with me, Sam.

SAM

She did it too.

SARGE

I'll take care of it. Now march!

(SAM is almost in tears. She runs inside)

Tina, out to the barn.

TINA

You're not gonna whip me, are you?

SARGE

(Tired)

I don't know yet. Get.

(TINA goes. Silence. JAMIE feels awkward. SARGE

sighs and grabs his headphones from the porch and

goes DR. He almost collapses at the flower bed.

He sits there motionless. JAMIE doesn't know what

to do. Lights fade to black)

ACT II

Scene 1

(Lights come up on the same scene as Act I. The

only change is SARGE's garden, which is showing

some signs of life. Whether the life is weed or

flower is unknown. It is very early morning but

the moon is full and the scene is well lit [though

the lighting is distinctly different]. As the

scene opens, JIMMY comes stumbling on drunk. He

drags on a ladder that he puts against the cover

over the porch [if an upstairs is not used then

Jimmy will go to a front window instead of an

upstairs window]. JIMMY climbs the ladder)

JIMMY

(As he goes to SAM's bedroom window)

Where's my sweet little chicky? She's gone and I'm all alone. Like Rodeo and Juliet, split up by their ma and pa, left with aching hearts. I got an achky-breaky heart baby and I'm coming for you.

(Knocks on window)

I can hear you now. "Oh, Rodeo. Oh, Rodeo. Where fartest you, Rodeo."

(Laughs at his own joke)

Oh, Juliet.

(Knocks)

Juliet! If you don't come out, you gonna see yonder window break.

JAMIE

(Opens window. She is sleepy and cranky)

What do you want?

JIMMY

Can Sam come out and play?

JAMIE

She's asleep like I was before you started banging on our window.

JIMMY

Can't you wake her up?

JAMIE

No!

(Slams window down on his finger)

JIMMY

OW!

(Sucks on his finger)

SAM

(Sleepily. Off)

Who's out there, Jamie?

JAMIE

A sick loon.

SAM

(Opens window)

Jimmy?

JIMMY

Oh, hi, Sam. Gosh you look perdy.

SAM

What are you doing out there? You're gonna get me in trouble.

JIMMY

I need you, Sam. I'm feeling lonely.

SAM

You've been drinking. You know I don't like you when you're drunk.

JIMMY

Oh, come on, Sam. I've got needs you know.

SAM

So do I and I need sleep, now go away.

JIMMY

I ain't leaving.

SAM

Well, I ain't coming.

JIMMY

I feel my heart about to break.

(He falls against wall of house near the window

and starts a sick howl)

Owoooo!

SAM

(Falls half out of window to cover his mouth)

Stop that! You'll wake Sarge.

JIMMY

(Pulls her out)

I got you.

SAM

(Pushes him)

Quit playing around.

JIMMY

(Rolls near edge)

Look out below.

(SAM grabs him)

You do care.

(Throws his arms around her)

SAM

(Pulls away)

Stop it.

JIMMY

Why are you being so mean?

SAM

Me?

JIMMY

I just want a little love.

SAM

What you need is a cold shower and some coffee.

JIMMY

You're what I need, Sam. Don't you need me?

SAM

What I need is a big club.

JIMMY

But Sam. I'm hurting inside. Don't you care?

SAM

Not when you're like this.

JIMMY

(Angry)

Fine. I'll go.

(Goes to ladder)

Give me my ring.

SAM

What?

JIMMY

Give me my ring.

SAM

You don't mean it.

JIMMY

If you don't want me around, then I don't want you. Give it!

(SAM sadly takes off ring)

SAM

(Gets a mischievous look)

Fetch boy.

(She throws it off R)

JIMMY

Oh, man.

(Gets down and runs off R)

JAMIE

(Pokes her head out)

Is he gone?

SAM

(Sad)

Uh-huh.

JAMIE

Are you okay?

SAM

(Sits and rubs her finger)

No.

(Holds out hand)

I gave him back his ring.

JAMIE

You did?

(Crawls out)

SAM

Maybe I should have gone with him.

JAMIE

But he was so drunk. He smelled like a sick skunk.

SAM

Oh, he always smells like that.

(They laugh a little)

I really love him, Jamie, but sometimes... sometimes he can be such a creep.

JAMIE

There's a lot better guys in the world. Once you get out of here, you'll see that.

SAM

But that's just it, Jamie. All the guys I've met are creeps. I attract them like flies to manure.

JAMIE

Don't say that. You're a lot better than manure.

SAM

Thanks, I think.

JAMIE

That didn't come out right.

SAM

Let's not worry about it. We have other pressing matters to deal with.

JAMIE

What's that?

SAM

Sarge's letter.

(Takes it out)

JAMIE

You kept it?

SAM

Sarge won't miss it.

JAMIE

But it isn't yours.

SAM

Now you sound like, Paula. Fine Miss Prissy Pants. I'll read it on my own.

(SAM opens letter)

JAMIE

Since you opened it, I might as well listen.

SAM

(Smiles)

Sure. Why not?

(Reads)

"Dear Miyo, Thank you for sending me a picture of Little Billy. He is growing up fast. I see he is wearing the baseball cap I sent him. I hope he grows up to be a great baseball player like his father."

JAMIE

Now I know we shouldn't be reading this.

SAM

I knew Sarge did some things he doesn't like to talk about but this... this is too good.

JAMIE

If we get caught with this letter...

SAM

(Excited)

It gets better.

(Reads)

"If you ever need anymore money, just ask. I have some money set aside that Betty doesn't know about."

(Aside)

The plot thickens. It looks like Sarge was doing more than fighting in Vietnam. And if this is something Ma doesn't even know about... Wow. In the wrong hands, this letter could be a powerful tool to used against Sarge.

(Has a devious look on her face. The sun is

coming up)

JAMIE

I say we get rid of it before we get into trouble.

SAM

Then go back to bed, 'cause I'm readin' it.

JAMIE

That letter's private.

SAM

I said you didn't have to listen.

JAMIE

I know, but what about Sarge?

SAM

What about him?

JAMIE

He wouldn't want us reading it.

SAM

He'll never know. We won't get caught.

(Door opens below)

JAMIE

What was that?

SAM

Get down.

(They hide as PAULA comes out)

It's only, Paula.

PAULA

What a beautiful morning. Oh thank you, God for making sure I didn't miss this.

SAM

I hate morning people.

JAMIE

Shh!

PAULA

Look at that sun rising out of the mountains. You know, I think I'm getting a little peek at God.

(Rooster crows)

Oh, I'm coming Colonel Sanders. I haven't forgotten about you.

(Exits R)

SAM

That girl is so weird.

JAMIE

I wish I could be that happy in the morning. The only thing I like to see this early is my pillow.

SARGE

(Appears at window)

There you are. What are you girls doing?

(SAM stuffs letter down JAMIE's shirt and turns

with a smile to face SARGE)

SAM

We got up early to see the sunset.

JAMIE

Sunrise.

SAM

Sunrise. I've been bragging to Jamie so much about it she just had to see it.

SARGE

And how would you know how nice they are? You're never up this early.

SAM

How would you know?

SARGE

Because I'm always up this early.

SAM

Oh.

SARGE

A ladder? How did that get there?

SAM

A ladder? Gee I don't know. Did you know there was a ladder there Jamie?

JAMIE

Come on, Sam. I'm tired. Let's go back to bed.

SARGE

Sounds like a good idea to me.

(Goes inside window)

SAM

That was a close one.

JAMIE

Yeah, Sarge was sleeping pretty hard there wasn't he?

SAM

How was I supposed to know he got up this early?

(Reaches for the letter)

Where's the letter?

JAMIE

I don't think we should read it, Sam.

SAM

Hand it over or you'll be sorry.

JAMIE

Looks like I'll be sorry either way.

(Hands over letter)

SAM

Thanks.

(JAMIE heads back inside)

Don't you want to hear it?

JAMIE

Not really.

SAM

Oh, come on. What are you, chicken?

JAMIE

No, tired. Goodnight, Sam.

(JAMIE goes inside)

SAM

Gee whiz.

(Looks at letter)

Now it's no fun.

SARGE

(Appears below [or at door])

Sam?!

(SAM stuffs letter in her shirt)

SAM

What is this, a prison camp? Can't a person have a few moments to herself?

SARGE

Get back inside.

SAM

But Sarge...

SARGE

Back inside now or I might decide to find out the real reason you're up so early.

(SAM looks worried and heads for window)

PAULA

(Rushes on from R upset)

Sarge. You got to go to the barn quick.

(SAM stops)

SARGE

What is it, Paula?

PAULA

It's Jimmy. He's in the barn... naked.

SARGE

Naked?

PAULA

He's up in the hay loft, swing around, saying he's Tarzan. And he's naked...

SARGE

I'll go take care of it.

SAM

(Excited)

I'll go with you.

SARGE

You get in your room and don't come out until I tell you. Now I know why you were up so early. Things are starting to become clear to me now.

(Runs off R)

SAM

(Waves letter when he's gone)

You're not the only one who knows something, Sarge.

(She exits inside and PAULA sits on steps upset)

JAMIE

Paula? Are you okay?

PAULA

(Sobbing)

Yes, I'm fine.

JAMIE

Did something happen, Paula?

PAULA

Jimmy's naked.

(She covers her face and cries)

JAMIE

He's what?!

PAULA

Naked. He's in the barn swinging around. He thinks he's Tarzan.

JAMIE

(Trying not to laugh)

Oh.

PAULA

It was awful.

JAMIE

I'll bet it was.

PAULA

(Pause. Grows quieter)

I've never seen a boy naked before.

JAMIE

(Gets a disgusted look on her face)

And Jimmy was the first.

PAULA

What do you think about Jimmy?

JAMIE

Jimmy?

PAULA

Yeah. You think he's okay?

JAMIE

Well, let's just say if he and I were Adam and Eve, I'd probably do the world a favor and not reproduce.

PAULA

So you don't like him?

JAMIE

Let's just say he's not my type.

PAULA

Oh.

(Looks upset)

JAMIE

Why do you ask?

PAULA

Well, Jimmy was saying all kinds of stuff to me in there. Stuff I've never thought of before and well... I kind of liked some of it.

JAMIE

Oh.

PAULA

You know, I've never even been on a date. I mean being single was fine for Jesus and all, but I got special needs. Is that bad of me to think that way?

JAMIE

Well, no...

PAULA

I'd really like to get to know a boy. Hold his hand.

(Embarrassed)

Kiss him...

JAMIE

I don't think Jimmy's quite what you have in mind.

PAULA
I guess not, but there really isn't anybody else.

JAMIE

You go to church don't you?

PAULA

Yeah.

JAMIE

Don't you like any guys there?

PAULA

They all think I'm weird. Heck, they think all of us are weird. The only one of us they'll have anything to do with is Shelly and we all know why they like her.

JAMIE

Why's that?

PAULA

'Cause she's pretty.

JAMIE

You're pretty.

PAULA

Not like that.

JAMIE

No, but in your own special way.

PAULA

But guys don't want special.

JAMIE

Some do.

PAULA

I haven't met any.

JAMIE

One will come along.

PAULA

You think so?

JAMIE

Sure.

(PAULA smiles)

Tell you what. Why don't we go up to your room and I'll show you just how pretty you are. We'll put some make-up on you, do your hair, and find a dress that compliments your better qualities.

PAULA

I don't know.

JAMIE

Come on. It'll be fun. And if you don't like it, you can wash it all off.

PAULA

(Smiles)

Jamie?

JAMIE

Yeah?

PAULA

Why are you being so nice to me?

JAMIE

What do you mean?

PAULA

Nobody else here cares. At least not any of the girls.

JAMIE

I'll have to tell you, Paula. Not everybody is like the girls you live with here. There are some pretty nice people out there. Sometimes they're hard to find, but they're there.

PAULA

I'm sure glad I found one of them.

JAMIE

I am too. Let's go.

(They go inside arm in arm. SARGE and JIMMY enter

R. JIMMY is mostly dressed)

SARGE

(Pointing at steps on porch)

Sit.

(JIMMY does. SARGE stares at JIMMY a minute)

JIMMY

Are you gonna kill me, Sarge?

SARGE

I'm thinking about it.

(Pause. JIMMY is very nervous)

What were you doing up there? And don't lie to me. I was once a pretty good liar myself, so I know one when I see one.

JIMMY

I guess I had a little too much to drink.

SARGE

Right under your parent's noses...

JIMMY

Man, they don't care. You should see them sometime. Talk about drunk.

SARGE

But you're just a kid.

JIMMY

I'm almost 18. And I only have two years of high school left.

SARGE

You may not make it to 18 if you keep this up.

(JIMMY gets quiet)

What else were you doing over here?

JIMMY

I was looking for Sam.

SARGE

I thought so.

JIMMY

Then why'd you ask?

SARGE

Don't get mouthy.

JIMMY

Sorry. It's the booze talking.

SARGE

Well, it better stop talking or it's going to get dunked into the water trough.

JIMMY

We didn't do nothing, Sarge. Sam kicked me out even.

SARGE

She did?

JIMMY

She didn't want to get in trouble. Man, was she mean to me.

SARGE

She was?

JIMMY

I was so mad at her for not coming. That's why I did the Tarzan bit in the barn. I wanted you to think there was more going on.

SARGE

Was there?

JIMMY

No! Sam and I didn't do nothing. Really.

(Mad)

All we did was fight. I made her give my ring back.

SARGE

The promise ring?

JIMMY

Yeah. But she threw it somewhere. Now I can't find it.

SARGE

It's right here.

(Takes it out of pocket)

I found it on the way to the barn.

JIMMY

Maybe it's a sign. Maybe Sam and me is supposed to make up.

SARGE

Maybe so. Maybe not.

(Pause)

I'm not sure I want you around Sam anymore.

JIMMY

Oh.

SARGE

But she really likes you and if she wanted to be with you she'd find a way.

(Paces)

The more I'd say no, the more she'd find times to sneak away.

(Studies JIMMY)

So maybe we can take care of this some other way.

JIMMY

(Nervous)

Uh... like how?

SARGE

Growing up, I did a lot of stupid things too. Maybe not as crazy as Tarzan, but I was wild. See my mother died when I was real young and my pappy didn't want to take care of me. So my family sent me around, hoping somebody could handle me, but I only got worse. My big moment was in a barn too. But I burnt it down. That's when my Aunt Minnie took me in. And for the first time somebody loved me no matter what I did wrong. Even though I didn't change over night, that love stuck with me. And as I grew older, that love become more and more a part of me until all the hate was gone.

JIMMY

So what's your point?

SARGE

The point is, Jimmy, that you need some love. Not the kind of love that involves sex, but a caring kind of love.

(Pause)

And maybe Sam can give that to you.

JIMMY

I don't think she wants to now.

SARGE

Maybe she will. Let's bring her out and give it a try.

JIMMY

I don't know. I was a real jerk last night.

SARGE

If you're not ready then we shouldn't do it. You have to want to change.

JIMMY

I want to. I always want to, but it's hard. Wasn't it hard for you?

SARGE

It took more than 30 years.

JIMMY

Thirty years?

SARGE

More probably. I stopped counting.

(Frowns at the memories)

I used to have some awful habits. Drinking, smoking, gambling. Gambling was the worst. I gave up the other things with no problem, but gambling... I still can't even look at a deck of cards.

JIMMY

How did you finally give it up?

SARGE

I don't know that I have. A few years ago I was caught up in it again. Some old friend invited me over and they thought what I'd love was a game of poker cause that's what we used to do together. Of course they talked me into playing. What a terrible night.

JIMMY

You lost big, huh?

SARGE

No, I won.

JIMMY

How much?

SARGE

Several hundred dollars.

JIMMY

Really? Cool.

SARGE

No, it wasn't. I felt the old desires coming back. I was secretly planning a trip to Nevada in my head. I never did spend any of the money though. I couldn't.

JIMMY

Do you still have it?

SARGE

No. I felt to guilty I did the only thing I could think of to make up for it.

JIMMY

What?

SARGE

I gave it to our church.

JIMMY

All of it?

SARGE

All of it.

JIMMY

Too bad.

SARGE

So are you willing to give something up for Sam?

JIMMY

Like what?

SARGE

Drinking maybe.

JIMMY

But all my friends drink.

SARGE

You need different friends.

JIMMY

Everyone will think I'm a total loser.

SARGE

Sam won't.

JIMMY

(Sighs. Looks at ring)

I guess I could give it a try.

SARGE

No. Either you will or you won't. There's no in the middle.

JIMMY

(Thinks)

Okay. I will. For Sam.

SARGE

I'll get her.

(Opens door)

Sam. Will you come down please?

(Steps out)

JIMMY

(Stands. Paces)

What should I say to her?

SARGE

Whatever you feel is right.

SAM

(Comes out)

Yeah, Sarge.

(Sees JIMMY)

What's he doing here?

SARGE

I had a little talk with him. Now I think it's your turn.

(SARGE sits on porch and pretend to read a

magazine. He keeps watch on the following)

SAM

(After staring at him a minute)

Well?

JIMMY

I'm sorry.

SAM

If you are so sorry, why do you keep doing it? This isn't the first time you've come around at night acting like a baboon.

JIMMY

I swear, Sam. If you take me back, I'll stop drinking.

SAM

But you'll only stop if I take you back.

JIMMY

No, I'm quitting. I promise.

SAM

(Pause. Studies him)

You really want me back.

JIMMY

More than anything.

(They stare happily at each other. SARGE rolls

his eyes)

SARGE

Go ahead and hug him.

(They hug happily)

SAM

Could we go for a walk, Sarge?

SARGE

I guess. But don't go far.

SAM

We won't.

SARGE

And stay out of the barn.

(SAM laughs as they exit L)

I hope this doesn't backfire on me.

(JAMIE comes out)

JAMIE

Ma isn't back with Shelly yet, huh?

SARGE

Nope. But they should be here soon. The doctor gave the okay last night.

JAMIE

Where's Sam?

SARGE

Taking a walk with Jimmy.

JAMIE

They made up?

SARGE

Guess so.

JAMIE

And Tina's still in bed.

SARGE

Why? What ya' need?

JAMIE

I had something I wanted to show everyone.

SARGE

What is it?

JAMIE

Maybe I should wait for everybody.

SARGE

I ain't nobody, you know.

JAMIE
Okay. I'll be right back.

(JAMIE disappears inside. SARGE smiles and waits.

JAMIE is inside and calls out:)

Now close your eyes, Sarge.

SARGE

(Closing eyes)

Yes, ma'am.

JAMIE

Here we come.

(JAMIE comes out with PAULA who is done up

beautifully in make-up, a new hair style, and a

very nice dress. JAMIE guides her out. PAULA is

embarrassed)

Okay, Sarge.

SARGE

(Sees PAULA. Is surprised)

Well, look at you.

PAULA

Is that good?

SARGE

You look wonderful, Paula. I almost didn't recognize you.

PAULA
Really?

SARGE

You're as pretty as any girl I've ever seen.

PAULA

(Blushing)

Thanks, Sarge.

JAMIE

See, Paula. You are pretty.

PAULA

I guess so.

JAMIE

We need a picture of this.

SARGE

You bet we do. I'll go get my camera.

(Goes inside)

PAULA
This is so wonderful. Thank you, Jamie.

JAMIE

It was no trouble at all.

JIMMY

(He enters from R with SAM)

Hey, who is this?

JAMIE

Can't you tell?

JIMMY

(Looks hard. PAULA looks away)

Is that...no way. Paula?

JAMIE

Sure is.

JIMMY

You are lookin' fine, Paula. Mighty fine. I didn't know you were so good-lookin'.

PAULA
Me neither.

JAMIE

It's a shame she's been hiding it all this time.

JIMMY

I don't know where it was, but it sure looks good now.

SAM

(Punches him)

Hey, you watch yourself.

JIMMY

I didn't mean nothing by it.

(SAM goes to door)

I was only trying to make her feel good.

SAM

I have to go make breakfast.

(Exits inside)

PAULA

Sam's making breakfast? I thought she couldn't cook.

JAMIE

Maybe I better go help her.

(Exits inside)

JIMMY

I better go home too. Man, I am going to get it.

PAULA

(Shy)

Bye, Jimmy.

JIMMY

(Smiles)

Bye, Paula. Boy are you one hot looking chick.

(PAULA is embarrassed but happy)

SARGE

(Comes out with camera. TINA follows)

Doesn't Paula look great?

TINA

(Laughs)

Yeah. Too bad it isn't Halloween yet.

SARGE

Tina!

PAULA

She's just jealous. Everybody else thinks I look great.

(Goes inside)

SARGE

Now she's upset.

(Exits inside)

TINA

What did I do? Geez. Some people can't take a joke.

(Hears truck)

Well, look who's here. Hi, Ma! Hey, Shelly! Welcome home!

MA
(MA and SHELLY enter L)

Thank you, Tina.

SHELLY

Boy, oh, boy, did I miss your cookin', Ma. I don't know where they get that hospital food, but it ain't from an animal, a vegetable, or a mineral.

TINA

They do that so you don't want to stay.

SHELLY

It worked.

You girls go ahead and talk. I'll take your bag inside.

SHELLY

Thanks, Ma.

(She kisses MA and hugs her. MA takes SHELLY's

bag inside. SHELLY and TINA sit on the front

porch)

TINA

I'm glad to have you back. I don't think I could of handled these screwballs by myself much longer.

SHELLY

I'm pretty much glad to be back. I'm gonna miss one thing though.

TINA

What's that?

SHELLY

Mr. Lincoln Jefferson Jones.

TINA

Who?

SHELLY

The most gorgeous hunk o' boy my eyes ever feasted on.

TINA

He ain't a doctor is he?

SHELLY

Nope, not yet anyway. Jeffy was a volunteer there.

TINA

Jeffy?

SHELLY

That's what I called him.

TINA

How did you meet him?

SHELLY

Jeffy volunteered at the hospital as a service to the community. He says he's always trying to find ways to help people.

TINA

I know how he could help you.

(They laugh)

SHELLY

He's so perfect. Straight A's and student body president.

TINA

He ain't a geek?

SHELLY

No, honey, he's fine.

TINA

So what kind of service did he do for you?

SHELLY

We just did a lot of talking.

TINA

Yeah, right.

SHELLY

(Winks)

And maybe a little more.

TINA

I knew it.

SHELLY

But it all was very proper. 'Cause I'm a proper kind of girl.

TINA

You are?

SHELLY

(Hits TINA)

When I want to be.

TINA

So what did you do?

SHELLY

Be patient. One step at a time.

TINA

Okay. How did it get started?

SHELLY

He was the one that delivered flowers to all the rooms. I saw him all the time and smiled when he went by. I guess I did enough smiling, 'cause one day he stopped with some flowers for me.

TINA

Who from?

SHELLY

Him.

TINA

Score!

SHELLY

"They were left over," he said. He thought I might like some. That's when the talkin' started. I told him my name was Mercedes Masterson.

TINA

You didn't.

SHELLY

I did. He called me Mercy for short.

TINA

Heaven help us.

(They laugh)

What else did you tell him?

SHELLY

I said I was a cheerleader and a tennis champ. I said I go to a private girls' school in California and I let him know I sure miss boys out there.

TINA

Go, Shelly, go.

SHELLY

(In a high class voice)

That's Mercy, dear.

TINA

Is that how you talked?

SHELLY

Of course, dear.

(Laughs, back to normal voice)

It drove him wild.

TINA

What else did you tell him?

SHELLY

That I was very lost and confused and I needed some guidance. My mum and my dad were never around and I really needed someone to help me.

TINA

This is better than TV.

SHELLY

He wanted to help so bad. He was a sweetie.

TINA

Is this where the kissing comes in?

SHELLY

Mercy looks for the finer qualities in men.

TINA

Yeah, right.

SHELLY

He knew I was leaving so he snuck in last night.

TINA

Yeah?

SHELLY

It was nice.

TINA

That's all?

SHELLY

What more do you want? You want me to tell it to you blow by blow?

TINA

Why not?

SHELLY

Forget it. There are some things we never tell.

TINA

Since when?

SHELLY

Since I met Jeffy.

TINA

Did you get his number?

SHELLY

Yeah.

TINA

Did he ask for yours?

SHELLY

Yeah, but I told him mummy would be furious. Mummy wants me to marry someone that's really, really rich. But I said I couldn't stand all those rich jerks. But if I don't marry one, I lose all of my money. And you know what he said?

TINA

What?

SHELLY

"Money doesn't matter, only you."

TINA

This is too good to be true.

SHELLY

(Smiles)

I know.

TINA

Are you going to call him?

SHELLY

I don't know if I should.

TINA

Why not?

SHELLY

It was fun at the time, but I don't...

TINA

You got a hot one. Don't lose him now.

SHELLY

We'll see.

TINA

You're crazy to let this one go.

SHELLY

I guess.

(SARGE enters from inside)

TINA

Hey, Sarge. Looks who's back.

SARGE

Hi, Shelly. How you doing?

SHELLY

Okay.

TINA

Sounds like she's doing great to me.

SHELLY

(Playfully)

Oh, you be quiet.

SARGE

Hey, look at that smile. That's what I like to see.

SHELLY

Sorry I was so mean when you were carrying me.

SARGE

Don't worry about it.

SHELLY

I know sometimes we don't get along, but that was pretty bad.

SARGE

I said don't worry...

SHELLY

Man, can't I even apologize? I'm trying to be nice here and you won't even let me.

SARGE

Let's not argue...

SHELLY

I'm not arguing.

SARGE

I didn't say you were.

SHELLY

You did too.

TINA

(Trying to avoid a conflict)

Hey, Shelly. Why don't we go for a walk?

SHELLY

Sure, why don't we?

(They start to go)

PAULA

(Runs out)

FIRE!

SHELLY

(She and TINA return)

What?

PAULA

(Stops. Smiles pleasantly)

Oh, hi, Shelly.

SARGE

Paula! What fire?

PAULA

(Remembers. Gets upset)

Sam started a fire.

(SAM and JAMIE run out)

SAM

(Excited)

Did you see that?!

(Makes explosion sound)

Foooom!

JAMIE

(Sarcastic)

Yeah, Sam, it was great.

SARGE

Where's Ma?

JAMIE

(Worried)

I don't know.

(MA appears and is black from the smoke)

SARGE

Are you okay?

Yes.

(They are try not to laugh, but it's hard not to.

MA does look funny)

Sam?

SAM

(Trying not to laugh)

Yes?

Is it okay if I make breakfast?

SAM

Sure, Ma.

Thank you.

(MA exits inside)

PAULA

(To TINA and SHELLY)

You've gotta see this.

(PAULA, TINA, and SHELLY rush inside)

JAMIE

I told you not to flip the bacon.

SAM

Okay, so I made a mistake. So sue me.

SARGE

Why don't we go in and help Ma clean up?

(SARGE goes in)

SAM

I don't think Ma really wants to see me right now.

JAMIE

Come on.

(They exit inside. Lights fade to black)

Scene 2

(Lights come up on SAM and SARGE. SARGE is

working on his garden and SAM does not look like

she is in a good mood. SAM walks cautiously up to

SARGE)

SAM

Sarge?

SARGE

Yes, ma'am?

SAM

Have you ever done something you wish you hadn't done?

SARGE

(Laughs)

More than I care to remember.

SAM

I wish I couldn't remember this last one.

SARGE

Why? What happened?

SAM

(Wants to tell, but doesn't)

I'm just in trouble with Ma over something. That's all.

(She turns away)

SARGE

It will all come out in the wash.

(Stops himself from saying more)

But I guess I'd better stay out of it.

(JAMIE comes out. SARGE stands)

If you'll excuse me. I've got to check on the ladies.

JAMIE

The ladies?

SAM

He means the cows.

JAMIE

Oh.

(SARGE exits R. SAM sits on the steps, upset)

What's with you?

SAM

You know that letter, the one Sarge wrote?

JAMIE

Yeah?

SAM

Ma caught me with it.

JAMIE

(Sits)

Oh, dear.

SAM

Yeah. She was so mad she made me wait out here until she decided what to do with me.

(Upset)

I watched her read the letter too. I think she started to cry.

JAMIE

What did the rest of the letter say?

SAM

It had more stuff about the kid. I think that lady wants to send him to America to live with Sarge. Ma would love that.

JAMIE

I wonder what Ma's gonna do.

SAM

I wouldn't be surprised if she killed both me and Sarge. She's pretty upset.

(Stands. Tears are coming. She can barely be

heard)

Why do I always do this?

JAMIE

(Goes to her)

Do what?

SAM

Mess things up.

(Pause)

I get something good then I mess it up.

(Kicks something handy)

I always have to go and spoil things for people. I just try to have a little fun... but... I don't know when to stop. I keep playing... like a little kid who tells a funny joke over and over. They keep saying it 'cause it was funny once so it should be funny a bunch of times. Then when it's not funny any more, they don't know how to quit. They keep trying, hoping it will still be funny. They keep on joking until someone gets mad and... hurts you.

(Pause)

I'm always playing games. I can't stop.

(She has trouble speaking)

I... can't... stop.

(JAMIE wants to say something but doesn't know

what. MA appears at screen door. Girls don't see

her. SAM gains control again)

I always hurt someone. My daddy left because of me.

(Sees JAMIE's reaction)

He did. I found a letter he wrote my mama. He said he didn't want to be tied down by a kid.

(Chokes)

Mama said it was for the best.

(Sad)

But I ran Mama off too. She had better things to do than to sit around playing my games.

(Looks at house)

And I'm still playing my little games. I should have listened to you, Jamie. You got a good head. You stopped playing games when you were two or three I bet. Adults always like you... Me? I get 'em to like to hate me. Get 'em so worked up they want nothing but to have me gone.

JAMIE

(After long pause)

Oh, Sam. I'm sorry.

SAM

(Laughs over crying)

Sorry? Don't be sorry. You gotta admit, I do it well.

JAMIE

Don't be so hard on yourself, Sam. You're a good person. People like you.

SAM

Just drop it, Jamie.

(Sits. Trying to control her crying)

I'm sure you've got better things to do.

(JAMIE doesn't know what to do. SAM looks away)

I wanna be alone.

(JAMIE nods and exit R)

(Comes out)

Sam. Can we talk now?

(SAM is silent)

I can't lie and say I'm not angry. What you did wasn't very nice. Something like this can hurt a lot of people. It could hurt me, it could hurt Sarge, and it could hurt you.

(MA sits by SAM)

But it doesn't mean I don't love you anymore.

SAM

(Gets up)

Why do you have to talk so much?

(Turns. Angry)

Can't you get it over with! Can't you punish me and be done with it!

(Turns away)

I hate all this talk. Doesn't get us anywhere.

Sam. I think you've punished yourself more than I ever could. But there is one thing I want you to do. I want you to tell Sarge what you did.

SAM

I... I can't.

You have to learn to face your troubles, Sam. I can't always be around to clean up after you.

SAM

Sarge will hate me.

He won't hate you, Sam. None of us hate you.

SAM

But I'm so awful.

There's nothing you could do that would make us stop loving you. We might be angry, we might yell and scream, but we'd never stop loving you.

SAM

(Sighs)

Okay. I'll tell him.

Good.

SAM

But if he never talks to me again, it'll be all your fault.

(Tries to hide her smile)

That's a chance I'll just have to take.

(MA exits. SAM paces, wondering what to say to

SARGE)

JAMIE

(Returns)

I saw Ma leave. How did it go?

SAM

Okay, I guess.

JAMIE

What did she say?

SAM

She said I have to tell Sarge about what I did.

JAMIE

You have to tell him about the letter?

SAM

I don't know what to say.

(JAMIE doesn't either)

Maybe I should go throw myself off a cliff now and save Sarge the trouble.

JAMIE

(Shocked)

Sam?!

SAM

(Smiles)

Oh, don't get your panties in a bunch. I wouldn't really do it.

JAMIE

You never know.

SAM

Life ain't that bad.

SARGE

(Returns from R)

Man alive, it is a beautiful day, isn't it?

(Looks at SAM)

Still under the weather, aye Sammy?

SAM

I guess.

(Can't bring herself to say anything more)

SARGE

Boy, there are too many Gloomy Gusses today. You ain't too happy and Ma is sure in a mood. I wonder what's buggin' her?

(SAM and JAMIE give each other a look)

It can't be the weather. Maybe it's a full moon.

(Turns to JAMIE)

How about giving me a helpin' hand, Jamie?

JAMIE

What are we doing?

SARGE

We're getting a new calf from town and I need some help bringing the thing here.

JAMIE

I think I can handle that.

SARGE

It'll be fun. Trust me.

(SAM looks away)

Meet me out in the barn. We need to get a few things first.

(SARGE exits R)

JAMIE

When are you going to tell him?

SAM

I don't know. Never I guess.

JAMIE

You have to tell him some time.

SAM

(Annoyed)

That's not really any of your business, now is it?

JAMIE

Okay, sorry.

(JAMIE starts to leave but MA comes out with

something strange. JAMIE stays to see what's up)

Sam. Do you know anything about this?

(MA holds up a box from a home pregnancy test)

JAMIE

What is it?

It's a home pregnancy test.

SAM

(Jumps up when she sees it)

It ain't mine.

I want the truth now.

SAM

(Intensely)

But it isn't. I swear.

(Rings breakfast bell)

This has not been my day.

(SHELLY and TINA come running in first)

TINA

Breakfast already?

No, we need to talk.

SHELLY

What about?

I'll wait 'til we're all here.

PAULA

(Enters)

I'm starved. Hey, what we all doin' out here.

SHELLY

(Snotty)

We all gotta talk.

(SARGE comes last)

SARGE

It's a little early for breakfast isn't it?

We have something we need to talk about.

(MA shows the home pregnancy test box)

I found this in the bathroom. I don't normally go digging through the garbage, but this caught my eye as I was emptying the trash.

SHELLY

It ain't mine.

TINA

No way.

PAULA

Me neither.

SHELLY

(Evil smile)

Is it Sam's?

SAM

No.

SHELLY

I bet it is.

SAM

It's yours isn't it, Shelly?

SHELLY

No.

(TINA looks at SHELLY unsure)

SAM

What about Jeffy?

SHELLY

How did you know about him?

SAM

You have "I love Jeffy" written all over everything.

SHELLY

Then there's you and Jimmy.

That's enough girls.

SHELLY

But that's not mine.

SAM

Me neither.

MA
Tina and Paula, you can go. I want to talk to Sam and Shelly.

(TINA and PAULA reluctantly go in the house. They

want to hear, but MA gives them a look that

hurries them along)

SARGE

You go on too, Jamie. I'll meet you in the barn.

JAMIE

Okay.

(JAMIE leaves)

MA
I want to talk to Shelly first. Sam, you wait outside.

(MA leads a pouting SHELLY inside)

SHELLY

But I didn't do it.

(SAM and SARGE are alone)

SARGE

(Calmly)

Is it yours, Sam?

SAM

(Frustrated)

No.

SARGE

Are you and Jimmy....

SAM

No!

SARGE

Really?

SAM

Don't you believe me?

SARGE

I do.

SAM

I wish Ma would. She always takes Shelly's side. Shelly will have Ma convinced it was me.

SARGE

I only hope whoever it is tells us.

SAM

I seriously doubt they will.

SARGE

You go ahead and run along. I'll take care of it.

SAM

You sure?

SARGE

Yeah.

(SAM hugs him)

SAM

Thanks.

SARGE

No problem.

(SAM starts to go happily, but stops)

Something wrong?

(SAM isn't sure)

You want to talk about something else?

SAM

I don't know.

SARGE

Is it about Jimmy?

SAM

Well...no.

(Pause. She isn't sure how to explain the letter)

It's about you.

SARGE

What?

SAM

I found something... something private... that maybe I shouldn't have seen.

SARGE

Something of mine?

SAM

(Upset)

Yeah.

SARGE

What was it?

SAM

(Pause)

A letter.

SARGE

Who was it from?

SAM

It was from you.

SARGE

To whom?

(Pause)

SAM

(Looks away. Grow quiet)

To Vietnam.

SARGE

Oh, dear.

(SARGE isn't as upset as SAM would expect. She's

puzzled by his calmness)

I should be more careful about leaving my letters out for everyone to see.

(SAM can't bring herself to say any more)

(MA comes out. SHELLY is in tears. She exits L)

Your turn Sam.

SARGE

We already talked.

I would like to talk to her too.

SARGE

Sam, why don't you go inside.

(SAM obeys)

It's not her's.

How do you know?

SARGE

I just do.

You do, huh?

SARGE

Look, Betty. Sam and I have an understanding. We don't keep secrets and we don't lie.

You don't, huh? Then I guess she hasn't told you yet about her bad habit of reading your letters.

SARGE

How do you know about that?

I caught Sam reading your letter.

(Pause)

Sam told you then?

SARGE

Just now.

(MA is surprised. Her expression changes from

anger to hurt)

Who is she?

SARGE

Huh? Oh, you mean the letter. I wish I could remember what the letter said.

(MA pulls it out from her pocket and hands it to

SARGE)

I took it from Sam.

SARGE

(Looks at envelope)

Return to sender.

(Upset)

I hope nothing happened to them.

(Mad)

Who are they?

SARGE

(He looks at MA, unsure about what to say)

I wasn't supposed to tell you.

I think you'd better now.

SARGE

(Paces)

Billy didn't want me to tell.

(Shocked)

Billy?

SARGE

Yes, your brother.

Then it's not your...

SARGE

(Laughs)

No.

(Goes to her)

Did you think that the kid was mine?

MA
I didn't know what else to think.

SARGE

Billy met her during the war. She was the only survivor from her village. Billy was the one who found her and was the one to take care of her.

(Pause)

Billy wanted to marry her and bring back to the states.

(Pause. SARGE is upset)

But he never made it out.

(MA turns not wanting to discuss her brother's death)

A lot of good men died over there.

So the boy is Billy's.

SARGE

Yeah.

And you've been helping them?

(SARGE nods)

How come you never told me?

SARGE

I wanted to, but Billy made me promise. I guess he didn't want his family to be ashamed. They weren't married yet or anything. It all just sort of happened.

(SARGE looks at letter, confused)

I don't understand why this letter was returned though. I hope she's okay.

I hope so too.

(MA goes and kisses SARGE)

SARGE

What was that for?

MA
(Smiles)

Can't I kiss you?

SARGE

Why sure, but I...

(Laughs)

Oh, never mind.

(He kisses her)

I guess I can go then. We'll have to wait out whoever isn't talking about the pregnancy test. And I said I'd be there soon.

SARGE

So where is it you're going again?

To help a sick friend.

SARGE

You're keeping something from me, aren't you? This friend wouldn't be a man would it?

It's nothing like that. But it is a secret.

SARGE

I hate secrets.

I know and you can never keep one. That's why I'm not telling you.

SARGE

So the secret doesn't involve me?

No, and that's all I'm telling you.

TINA

(Comes to door)

Can we come out now?

After you get my bags out of my room.

TINA

You're leaving now?

I sure am.

(TINA exits inside)

SARGE

Aren't you going to make breakfast first?

I'll let you handle it.

SARGE

I guess I can do cereal.

You can do more than that? Have one of the girls help you.

TINA

(Comes out with SHELLY. They are carrying the

bags)

Here they are.

SHELLY

Where do you want them?

(JAMIE, PAULA, and SAM come out)

(To SHELLY and TINA)

Will you take them out to the car?

TINA

No problem.

PAULA

(Worried)

How long you gonna be gone?

As long as it takes my friend to get better.

PAULA

How long is that?

(Smiles and hugs PAULA)

I'll be back soon. You won't even know I'm gone.

SAM

(Joking)

Sarge isn't gonna cook is he?

(Smiles)

I left the number of the hospital by the phone.

SARGE

(Laughs)

I'm not that bad.

Shelly and Tina are good cooks.

SAM

I hope so.

MA
They cook all the time, Sam. Something you need to start doing soon.

SAM

I'm a good cook.

SARGE

Toast and microwave popcorn doesn't count.

PAULA

Sometimes she even burns those.

JAMIE

And remember the last time you tried cooking.

SAM

What is this? Pick on Sam day.

You all behave while I'm gone. Remember who's in charge.

SAM

(Smiles)

Me?

(Evil eye)

Samantha.

SAM

(Shivers)

Don't call me that.

SARGE

You'd better get going. You want to be there before dark.

I'll call when I get there.

JAMIE

Drive safely.

PAULA
(Sad)

We'll miss you.

(Hugs her)

SAM

Don't do anything I would do.

(MA waves and exits L)

There she goes.

(SHELLY and TINA reenter)

SHELLY

It's party time.

TINA

The cat's away and we will play.

SARGE

You will, huh?

SHELLY

Just kidding, Sarge.

SARGE

(Skeptical)

Uh-huh. You girls got your chores done?

TINA

Yeap.

SARGE

Mind if I check.

SHELLY

Well, maybe not all done. But almost.

SARGE

You might as well wait 'til after breakfast.

SHELLY

You want us to cook?

SARGE

No, Sam and I will do it.

SAM

We will?

SARGE

Sure. I did a little cooking in the army.

SAM

Oh, boy. Army food.

SARGE

It's not so bad. My favorite was the raisin bread. Though I'm still not sure where they got the raisins from. The guys joked that they were flies that got stuck in the bread batter. I'm not so sure they were wrong.

SHELLY

We can cook if you want us to Sarge.

TINA

Hey, yeah, no problem.

SARGE

No, we got it covered, don't we Sammy?

SAM

Uh, yeah, sure.

(SARGE goes happily in. SAM follows looking

worried)

TINA

This is going to be scary.

(Motorcycle is heard off L)

SHELLY

Look who's coming?

TINA

If it isn't Sam's knight in shining leather.

JIMMY

(Off L)

Hi, girls.

(Enters)

Got your mail.

SHELLY

Thanks, Jimmy.

(Goes to get it. He pulls it away)

JIMMY

What's it worth to you?

TINA

(Stands. Punches her first into her palm)

What's it worth to you?

JIMMY

(Annoyed)

Here.

(Hands mail to SHELLY. Speaks to TINA)

I already lost one tooth because of you.

TINA

You need to watch what you say.

JIMMY

Hey, who's Mercedes Masterson anyway? Is she a new girl?

SHELLY

(Angry)

Where you looking through our mail again?

JIMMY

I didn't open anything?

TINA

You better not have or I'll bop you one.

(SHELLY finds her letter and is elated)

JIMMY

I guess I'll see you all later.

(He exits and rides off on motorcycle)

TINA

I don't know what Sam sees in that guy.

SHELLY

(Touched)

Oh, Tina, listen to this. "Dearest Mercy,"

TINA

Skip to the juicy parts.

SHELLY

It's all heavenly. "Mercy. There couldn't be a more perfect name for you. You are my angel of mercy."

TINA

Does it get juicy?

SHELLY

"But I have a confession to make."

TINA

Oh, dear.

SHELLY

"My name isn't really Lincoln Jefferson Jones."

TINA

Thank goodness.

SHELLY

"I'm afraid I lied to you about a lot of things. I'm not really a straight A student and I'm not president of the student body. I'm not even a volunteer at the hospital. I have to be there as a community service for getting in trouble at school. But I told you all of this because I wanted you to like me. Someone as beautiful and wealthy as you could never like anyone as terrible as me."

TINA

It sounds like you two are made for each other.

SHELLY

"I know you probably want nothing to do with me now that you know the truth about me. But I knew I couldn't lie to you forever. I've never met anyone like you before. I don't think I ever will again. I'm sorry this has to end so soon. Our last night together is something I'll never forget."

Isn't it wonderful, Tina?

TINA

I'll say.

SHELLY

He liked me enough to tell the truth. That takes a lot of guts.

TINA

Sounds like a good catch to me.

SHELLY

He is dreamy.

TINA

So does it get juicy after that.

SHELLY

(Smiles)

Wouldn't you like to know?

TINA

It does?

SHELLY

I'm not telling. It's private.

TINA

Oh, come on, Shelly.

SHELLY

There are some things a girl of virtue will not share.

TINA

Oh, please. Give me a break.

SHELLY

Let's go out to the barn where no one can hear.

TINA

Okay.

(The girls laugh and run off R. LIGHTS FADE TO

BLACK)

Scene 3

(Lights come up on SHELLY, TINA, PAULA, and JAMIE

sitting or standing outside, looking ill. DR the

flowers are in bloom)

TINA

Five days of Sam's cooking.

PAULA

I don't feel so good.

SHELLY

Me neither.

JAMIE

What did they put in those omelets?

SHELLY

I don't want to know.

(PAULA is looking very ill)

TINA

Tasted like onions, peppers...and who knows what...

JAMIE

I think it had some egg too.

(PAULA is looking worse and worse)

TINA

Man was it hot. Fresh out of Mexico.

SHELLY

At least I hope everything was fresh.

TINA

I hope they didn't use that moldy squash.

PAULA

(Yells and runs)

I'm gonna puke.

(Exits R)

JAMIE

(Feeling ill herself)

I better see if she's okay.

(JAMIE follows R)

TINA

I hope Ma comes home soon. I can't wait to eat good food again.

SHELLY

That is if we survive.

SAM

(Comes out happily)

Hi, girls. Like breakfast?

(SHELLY and TINA glare)

It was our special Mexican surprise omelet.

TINA

What's the surprise?

SAM

(Pulls a clove from her pocket)

Extra garlic.

TINA

(Ready to throw up. Runs)

Oh!!

(SAM bites into it. SHELLY covers her mouth and

runs too)

SAM

What's wrong with them?

(JAMIE leads PAULA back on stage)

JAMIE

Feeling any better?

PAULA

No.

JAMIE

Maybe you should rest awhile.

PAULA

Maybe.

SAM

What's with her?

JAMIE

Breakfast didn't settle too well with her.

SAM

It's that whimpy stomach of hers. Can't take a little heat.

JAMIE

Why don't you go inside Paula?

PAULA

I think I'd rather sit out here. It still smells like breakfast inside.

(She goes and sits on porch)

SAM

She'll be fine.

JAMIE

Sam, I wanted to talk to you about something.

SAM

Yeah?

JAMIE

I know this is really none of my business...

SAM

But...

JAMIE

(Takes SAM aside)

Are you the one who's...

SAM

Who's what?

JAMIE

You know...expecting.

SAM

You mean having a baby? No way.

JAMIE

Really?

SAM

Hey, I ain't stupid. I'm careful.

JAMIE

So the home pregnancy test wasn't yours?

SAM

Nope.

(JAMIE looks confused)

Sorry to disappoint you.

JAMIE

Then who could it belong to?

SAM

I figured it wasn't you.

(Turns to look at PAULA)

And it's definitely not Paula.

(Thinks)

So my money is on Shelly.

JAMIE

What about Tina?

SAM

You want to know the truth?

JAMIE

Oh, no. Do I really want to hear this?

SAM

(Stage whisper)

It is my personal opinion that Tina is in love with Shelly.

JAMIE

No way. You mean...

SAM

Yeap. Tina is really a Tim.

JAMIE

You're kidding me.

SAM

I'm serious. Just watch her some time. She don't act much like a girl.

JAMIE

I suppose not.

(Skeptical)

Are you sure?

SAM

Fine. Don't believe me. See if I care.

JAMIE

It's hard to believe, that's all.

SAM

(Looks off L. SHELLY and TINA enter)

Here they come, watch.

(JAMIE rolls her eyes)

SHELLY

Look there's chef o' death.

(SAM smiles strangely at them)

TINA

(Annoyed)

What are you staring at?

SAM

Nothing.

(Smile grows weirder)

TINA

Quit staring.

SAM

Who me?

TINA

Yeah, you with the stupid grin.

SAM

Oh, sorry.

TINA

You watch it, Sam. I ain't in the mood for it today.

SAM

Yes, sir. Sorry, sir.

TINA

I oughta punch you now and save me the trouble.

SHELLY

Come on, Tina. Ignore her. She's only trying to bug you.

SAM

I believe it's your girls' turn to do dishes.

TINA

Yeah, we're goin'. We don't need you to be our mom.

(They start to go)

SAM

Bye, girls.

(TINA glares at SAM as they exit inside)

See!

JAMIE

I don't know, Sam.

SAM

I still don't think Tina's the one.

JAMIE

Who knows. Maybe Shelly got her pregnant.

SAM

(Smiles)

Hey, that was pretty funny. I didn't know you made jokes.

JAMIE

Every once in a while, I'll come out with a good one.

SAM

They're rare, but worth it.

JAMIE

Thanks.

PAULA

I feel sick.

SAM

Still?

JAMIE

Let's get you inside and in bed.

(JAMIE takes PAULA inside. SARGE comes out

looking over a piece of paper. He reads it

carefully. SAM watches him. He finds a mistake)

SARGE

Gosh darn-it. How'd I miss that?

(Corrects paper)

SAM

What-cha doin', Sarge?

SARGE

I got somethin' special for you girls.

SAM

Like what?

SARGE

Ring the bell and you'll find out.

SAM

Sure.

(Rings dinner bell. SHELLY and TINA come from off

R. JAMIE comes from inside)

SHELLY

What's goin' on?

TINA

You guys didn't cook again, did you?

SARGE

No, I got somethin' special for you.

SAM

(Joking)

Is it money?

SARGE

No.

(Looks around)

Where's Paula?

JAMIE

She's comin'. She's still not feelin' too well.

(PAULA comes out. She looks really ill)

Here she is.

SHELLY

What do you have, Sarge?

SARGE

Well, a certain somebody told me that I don't say very many nice things to you girls, so I wrote something nice about each of you. I want to share it with you now.

(All girls look at each other surprised)

SHELLY

You didn't have to do that.

SARGE

Sure I did. Listen.

(Turns to Sam)

Sam: You are a spunky girl, full of fire.

You will do anything you desire.

JAMIE

It's like a poem.

SARGE

You are smart enough to rule Iran,

And pretty enough to do the Can-can.

(Girls laugh)

You are funny even on a rainy day.

What else is there that I can say.

(All the girls clap and cheer)

SAM

(Hugs SARGE)

Thank you, Sarge.

SARGE

You bet.

SHELLY

That was really good.

TINA

Who's next?

SARGE

Paula is.

PAULA

(Shyly)

Me?

SARGE

Come on over here so I can see you.

(PAULA walks over reluctantly)

Paula, is it true,

That there is no one

Quite like you.

You are a lot of fun,

And you love Jesus too.

No one is as devout as you.

(Everyone cheers except for PAULA)

JAMIE

What's wrong, Paula?

PAULA

(Starts to cry)

None of that's true.

SARGE

Of course it is.

PAULA

It's all lies.

SHELLY

Paula, Sarge worked hard on these. Don't go and spoil it.

PAULA

But it's wrong. I'm not anything like that.

TINA
What are you talking about?

PAULA

I'm a horrible person. And I'm no Christian.

SARGE

Now, Paula. You're as faithful as anyone here.

PAULA

Don't say that.

JAMIE

Paula, calm down.

SARGE

(Confused)

Did I say something wrong?

SHELLY

No, she's just a spoiled brat.

SAM

Leave her alone.

PAULA

No let her scold me. I deserve to be hated. Especially by you, Sam.

SAM

(Yelling)

What in the hell are you talking about?!

(Pause. Silence)

PAULA

I slept with Jimmy.

(Long pause. Everyone is shocked)

SAM

(Venomous)

You what?

PAULA

He said you didn't love him any more and he needed somebody to love him.

SAM

My Jimmy?

SHELLY

Does this surprise you?

SAM

Shut up.

PAULA

And he told me I was pretty.

SAM

It was that easy, huh?

PAULA

No one ever told me I was pretty before.

(Pointed at the girls)

All I ever hear is how ugly I am.

SAM

I'm gonna kill him. I'm really gonna kill him.

PAULA

It was my fault, Sam.

SAM

I rather doubt it.

(Runs off L)

He's dead meat.

SARGE

Sam, come back here!

(Runs after her)

PAULA

How could I do such a thing?

(Burst into tears. JAMIE comforts her)

JAMIE

You'll be okay.

TINA

So are you pregnant?

PAULA

Huh?

TINA

The home pregnancy test. Did it test positive?

PAULA

I don't know what you mean.

TINA

Then it wasn't yours?

JAMIE

What?

(Big pause. JAMIE, TINA, and PAULA look at each

other then at SHELLY who has moved away from the

crowd)

TINA

Shelly?

SHELLY

I didn't really want anyone to know.

JAMIE

Then it was you?

SHELLY

Yeah.

JAMIE

Then Paula's okay?

PAULA

I hope so.

TINA

This is too much.

SHELLY

Jeff wants me to keep it.

TINA

He does?

(SHELLY nods and smiles)

How come you didn't tell me about any of this?

SHELLY

I didn't want to tell anyone until I knew what I was going to do.

JAMIE

What are you going to do?

SHELLY

I don't know.

(Screams are heard off L)

TINA

(Looks L)

Oh, my word.

SAM

(Off. Yells)

Put me down!

SARGE

Not until you cool down.

(SARGE carries SAM on stage either over his

shoulder or under his arm)

SAM

I'm gonna kill him!

SARGE

You better calm down, Sam.

SAM

I ain't stoppin' 'til he's dead!

SARGE

Have it your way.

(SARGE carries her off R)

JAMIE

Where's he taking her?

SAM

(Off)

Don't you dare! Sarge!!

TINA

He's gonna drop her in the water trough!

(Splash then scream)

SHELLY

I can't believe he did it. He always said he would, but he never has.

(SARGE and SAM enter together. SAM is soaked)

SARGE

Feel any better?

SAM
Much.

PAULA

I still don't feel so good.

SARGE

Jamie. Why don't you take Paula up to her room?

JAMIE

Sure. Let's go, Paula. I'll make you some more tea.

PAULA

And cinnamon toast?

JAMIE
I could probably do that.

SARGE

That's her favorite. Ma always makes it when she's sick.

(JAMIE and PAULA start inside)

And make sure there's plenty of honey in the tea.

JAMIE
Okay.

(JAMIE and PAULA close door)

SARGE

(Looks at remaining girls)

Well, this isn't exactly poem atmosphere now.

TINA

You can finish after dinner. We gotta go get it started now.

(TINA goes inside)

SHELLY

(Quietly)

Thank you, Sarge.

(Smiles)

For thinking of us.

(Looks at him)

And for listening.

(SHELLY gives SARGE a quick hug and then runs

inside)

SARGE

I didn't even get to read her poem.

SAM

Sarge?

SARGE

Yeah?

SAM

Why do you think Jimmy did that?

SARGE

I don't know, Sam. I didn't think he would. Especially not to Paula.

SAM

They prey on the weak.

SARGE

Nothing I said to that boy must've sunk in.

SAM

It did some good. But not for him.

SARGE

Did he tell you what I said?

SAM

Not really. Sort of I guess. But it still got to me. You could have done a lot worse to him. But you cared enough about me to work something out with him, even though you probably should have clobbered him.

SARGE

I've been talking to his parents and they've been concerned too. We're going to try and find some help for that boy before he gets into big trouble.

SAM

I don't care what you do, just keep him away from me. There's no tellin' what I'll do.

SARGE

Just leave it to me, Sam. We'll get him taken care of.

SAM

Thanks, Sarge.

SARGE

You bet. You better run up and take a shower and change your clothes before dinner. I'm going over to talk to Jimmy's parents again.

SAM

Okay.

(SAM goes inside and SARGE exits L. JAMIE and

PAULA come out. PAULA is wrapped in a blanket)

JAMIE

You wanna sit outside?

PAULA

Yeah.

JAMIE

Your tea's almost ready. You sit here and relax. I'll bring it right out.

(Sits in a chair on the porch. JAMIE exits.

JIMMY comes from R)

JIMMY

Hey, Paula. I saw Sarge leaving so I snuck around. Where's he goin'?

PAULA

(Upset. Pause)

I told him, Jimmy.

JIMMY

(A thousand painful deaths run through his mind)

What?

PAULA

I told him about what we did.

JIMMY

(Wanting it to be a dream)

You did?

PAULA

I told Samantha too.

JIMMY

(He now knows he is dead for sure)

You did?

JAMIE

(Comes out with tea and toast for PAULA. Sees

JIMMY)

You better get out of here, Jimmy. Sam's on the warpath.

JIMMY

(Remembering to keep his cool)

I ain't worried.

(But he really is)

JAMIE

You should be.

(Front door dramatically flies open. IT'S SAM!)

SAM

Jimmy! You're dead meat!

JIMMY

Wait! I can explain!

(Jumps on JIMMY and start punching him)

JIMMY

(They are on the ground. SAM hits him. SHELLY

and TINA enter to enjoy the fun. Tries to grab her arms.)

Stop! Aren't any of you gonna help me?

(Girls watch, enjoying the spectacle)

Help!

SAM

(Punch)

That's for me.

(Punch)

That's for Paula.

(Punch)

And that's just for fun.

(Picks him up and pulls him over to PAULA)

Now you say you're sorry to her.

JIMMY

(He tries to look hurt, like he is a victim)

I don't know what you mean.

SAM

(SAM slaps him in the head)

Say you're sorry or you'll be sorry.

JIMMY

(Pause)

Sorry, Paula.

SAM

(Pulls him up)

Good, now you die.

TINA

Don't forget the slow torture, Sam.

JIMMY

(JIMMY struggles to get free)

Let me go.

(SAM is trying to keep control. TINA grabs him

too. SHELLY helps also)

What's goin' on?

TINA

We are doing a service to women everywhere.

JIMMY

What are you going to do?

TINA

Something painful.

SAM

Something horrible.

TINA

Then we'll kill you.

JIMMY

Help!

SAM

Let's go girls! To the barn!

TINA

And the tool shed.

JIMMY

No!

SAM

Coming, Paula?

PAULA

(An evil look comes over her)

I wouldn't miss it for a million dollars.

SAM

To the barn!

(All the girls except JAMIE march JIMMY off.

JAMIE isn't sure what to think)

JAMIE

(Smiles. She realizes it could be fun)

I've got to see this.

(She runs off R)

(Enters L)

Hello. I'm back.

(Goes inside)

Hello.

(Comes out)

Where is everyone?

SARGE

(Enters L)

Hi, honey. Welcome home.

It's nice to be home.

(They hug)

SARGE

Have you seen Jimmy? I need to talk to that boy.

No, I haven't seen anyone. What did you do with all the girls?

SARGE

What do you mean?

There's nobody here.

SARGE

Oh, shoot. I was hoping you wouldn't notice.

Notice what?

SARGE

I sold them all to the Gypsies.

How much money did you get?

SARGE

(They laugh)

How did your secret mission go?

Operation Runaway was a success.

SARGE

Operation Runaway?

I'll explain later. Here comes one of the girls.

PAULA

(Off R)

I'll get the duct tape!

(She runs on and stops when she sees MA)

Ma! You're... uh... home.

Nice of you to notice.

SHELLY

Paula!

(Runs on)

Where's the duct...

(Sees MA)

...tape.

SARGE

What do you girls need duct tape for?

TINA

(Off)

Forget it, Shelly.

(Runs on)

We found a rope.

(Sees MA)

Oh, hi.

What is going on here?

PAULA

Well... uh... we're... uh...

TINA

We're having a rodeo.

SHELLY

Yeah!

TINA

We're doing calf roping.

SARGE

With duct tape?

TINA

That was for the... uh...

SHELLY

High jump.

TINA

You know. We were going to do horse jumping.

SHELLY

Sure! It's great fun.

TINA

We're doing all kinds of things.

PAULA

I'm a clown!

TINA

We already knew that.

JAMIE

(Runs on)

What's keeping you guys?

(Sees MA)

Oh.

Is nobody excited to so me?

SHELLY

Of course we are.

(Hugs MA. Other girls join in)

MA
(Smothered)

That's enough, girls. Thank you.

SHELLY

Is your friend better?

Much.

(SAM runs on)

SAM

You've got to see this.

(Stops)

Ooops.

See what?

TINA

We already told Ma about the rodeo.

SAM

Rodeo?

(TINA kicks SAM)

Oh, the rodeo!

SHELLY

(Hugs MA again)

Isn't it great to have Ma home, Sam?

SAM

Yeah. Hi, Ma. Welcome back.

It is nice to be back, I think.

(Smiles)

How was Sarge, girls? Did he behave himself?

SAM

It was hard, but we kept him in line.

SHELLY

He was great, Ma. No problems at all.

(Points to barn)

What's that up there hanging from the barn?

SARGE

(Notices for first time. Girls try to look

innocent)

Looks like a white flag or something.

Does anyone know what that is?

SAM

Nope.

Will you get that down for me, Sam?

SAM

But we kinda like it up there.

(Girls start laughing. MA grows annoyed)

Samantha. You get that down right now.

SAM

Okay, fine. Have it your way.

(SAM exits R. Girls laugh. SAM yells)

Do I have to touch it?

(Girls laugh more)

What is going on here?

SARGE

I have no idea. I wasn't over at Jimmy's that long.

You weren't having a rodeo, were you?

TINA

Well, no.

JAMIE

We did do some roping though.

(They laugh more)

Will someone tell me what's going on?

TINA

Here comes our fearless leader. Why don't you ask her?

(Looks off R)

What is that?

(Sees)

Oh, my.

(SAM comes on carrying the underwear like it

belonged to a skunk)

SARGE

That isn't my underwear is it?

SAM

Nope.

(Girls are dying, laughing)

MA
(Almost angry)

Who's are they, Sam?

(SAM can't say she is laughing too hard)

Either you tell me now or you can tell me out in the wood shed.

SAM

Okay, okay.

(Trying to control herself)

Well?

SAM

They're Jimmy's.

What?

SARGE

What did you do to him, Sam?

SAM

He's still alive if that's what you mean.

What's going on here?

SARGE

It's a long story.

You know about all this.

SARGE

Not completely.

What has been going on here?

SAM

You wouldn't believe us if we told you.

Try me.

(Pause)

SAM

Who wants to start?

(The girls laugh. They can't stop. MA sighs)

Never mind. It's been a long trip. You girls go inside and get dinner goin. I'll have Sarge explain.

(Girls exits. Still laughing, almost to the point

of crying. For the first time, they all go

together, as a group of friends, united as one)

SARGE

Jimmy's been making a lot of trouble.

(Pointing to underwear)

Those aren't...

(Looks away)

No, I don't want to know. Everyone's alive. That's all that matters.

SARGE

Well, I haven't seen Jimmy anywhere. Now I'm worried.

I'm sure he's fine. I really wanted to talk to you alone...

(Hands SARGE a letter)

...because of this.

SARGE

It's from Miyo.

(Opens letter. Reads)

Thank goodness they're okay.

Good.

SARGE

They had to move and they finally got their new address.

(Looks at MA)

I was pretty worried there.

(Reaches for envelope)

She sent another picture.

(Gives it to MA)

He even looks a bit like Bill.

MA
(Smiles)

Sure does.

(Looks at SARGE)

Are you still helping them?

SARGE

I was. I wasn't sure if I should now or not.

(Looks back at picture)

Billy would want us to.

SARGE

Yeah, I'm sure he would. He was never one to leave someone hanging.

Thank you for doing all this.

SARGE

It was the least I could do. I'm sure he would have done the same for me here.

I'm sure he would have.

SARGE

You still miss him, don't you?

(MA nods and sits beside him)

I miss him too.

(SARGE hugs her. A car is heard off L)

Who's that?

Oh, good. I didn't think they were too far behind me. It's a surprise. Jamie!

SARGE

It's your sister.

Jamie's mom.

SARGE

Who's the guy?

Her boyfriend.

JAMIE

(Comes out. SAM and PAULA tag along)

Yeah?

There's someone here to see you.

(JAMIE looks off L. Her expression becomes angry

when she sees who it is)

JAMIE

You told them didn't you?

I had to Jamie. Your mom was worried sick.

JAMIE

(Silent anger)

I thought I could trust you.

Please talk to her, Jamie.

(To SARGE)

Let's go inside.

(To PAULA and SAM)

You too, girls.

(PAULA goes)

SAM

Is that your mom?

JAMIE

Yeah, and her boyfriend too.

Sam.

SAM

I'm coming.

(MA and SAM exit with SARGE, leaving JAMIE

to face them alone. CONNIE and TOM enter L)

CONNIE

Hi, honey.

JAMIE

(Cold)

Hi.

CONNIE

How are you?

JAMIE

Fine.

CONNIE

I've been worried about you.

JAMIE

(Not responding)

Uh-huh.

CONNIE

Tom. If you go inside, Betty will introduce you to everyone.

TOM

Okay.

(TOM goes inside)

CONNIE

Jamie? Why did you run away?

JAMIE

You don't seem to want me around anymore.

CONNIE

That's not true. Of course I want you with me.

JAMIE

You haven't acted like it since Tom's been around.

CONNIE

Have you been jealous about the time Tom and I spend together?

JAMIE

It's not that. It seems like you care more about him than you do me.

CONNIE

Jamie, you'll always be my favorite person. No one can ever replace you.

JAMIE

You sure didn't make me feel that way.

CONNIE

Have I been that bad?

JAMIE

It's just that anything I say about Tom is some sort of big crime or something.

CONNIE

I want you to like him.

JAMIE

What for? He'll be gone soon, then they'll be another one.

CONNIE

(Annoyed)

I think we're pretty serious.

JAMIE

You've said that before.

CONNIE

You won't give me a chance will you? I need a life too, you know.

JAMIE

See, that's what I mean. I'm just in the way.

CONNIE

That's not true. I want you with me, but my whole life can't revolve around you.

(Pause)

JAMIE

(Calming down)

So what's so special about Tom anyway?

CONNIE

He's smart. He's funny. We have fun together.

JAMIE

That's it?

CONNIE

And he likes kids.

JAMIE

So?

CONNIE

I have to tell you, not many men want to get involved with women who have kids. Tom doesn't mind though. He has one too so he's open to it.

JAMIE

I know your last guy sure didn't like kids.

CONNIE

And I can't love a man who won't like my kid.

JAMIE

Yeah.

CONNIE

So will you come home?

JAMIE

Where is home now anyway?

CONNIE

With Tom. You'll like his house.

JAMIE

I guess. I liked the last guy's house better.

CONNIE

But he wouldn't let you touch anything.

JAMIE

True.

CONNIE

Tom's a great guy. You'll see.

JAMIE

I guess we can give it a try.

CONNIE

(Hugs JAMIE)

Thank you, honey. Let's make it work this time.

JAMIE

We'll try.

CONNIE

Tom will too.

JAMIE

I have to admit something though.

CONNIE

What's that?

JAMIE

I kinda liked it here. It's going to be hard to leave.

CONNIE

Because of Betty?

JAMIE

No, because of the girls.

CONNIE

Really? I heard they were kind of strange.

JAMIE

No stranger than the rest of us.

CONNIE

If you say so.

(Looks DR)

Who's garden?

JAMIE

Huh? Oh, Sarge's.

(Looks. Sees the full grown flowers)

Oh, my word...

JAMIE

(Yells)

Hey, everybody. Come look at this.

SARGE

(Comes out followed by MA, TOM, and PAULA. SHELLY

and TINA come from off R)

What is it?

JAMIE

Your flowers.

SARGE

(Runs up)

Holy cow. They grew!

(SAM comes out. Smiles)

SHELLY

You're kidding.

TINA

No way.

SARGE

Look!

I don't believe it.

CONNIE

How did you do it?

SARGE

I don't know.

SAM

(Joins them)

He's got a green thumb I guess.

SARGE

No, but I got a crooked one.

(Shows thumb)

TOM

How did you hurt your thumb?

TINA

Oh, no, not the thumb story.

(SHELLY and TINA take off)

SARGE

(SARGE takes TOM for a walk)

It was a baseball accident. I was playing in the minor leagues...

TOM

Really?

(SARGE and TOM exit L)

I still can't believe it.

SAM

Amazing, isn't it?

(Catching on)

You didn't have anything to do with this, did you Sam?

SAM

Who me?

Yes, you.

SAM

I won't dignify that with a response.

What am I going to do with you, Sam?

SAM

The question should be, "What would you do without me?"

Life sure would be boring.

JAMIE

It sure would.

I'll take you up to the guest room, Connie.

JAMIE

We staying?

CONNIE

For a day or two.

JAMIE

Good.

I sure didn't think Tom and Sarge would hit it off.

CONNIE

I didn't either. You just never know.

(MA and CONNIE go inside)

PAULA

Are you leaving, Jamie?

JAMIE

Yeah.

PAULA

I'm gonna miss you.

JAMIE

I'm going to miss all of you too.

PAULA

Really?

JAMIE

Yes, really.

SAM

You'll have to come back and visit.

JAMIE

I will. And you can come visit me.

SAM

You'll have to come see Shelly's baby.

JAMIE

Did she decide to keep it?

SAM

They want to. I think they're crazy.

JAMIE

Maybe it will be okay.

SAM

Stranger things have happened.

JAMIE

(Smiles)

Yeah, like those flowers there.

SAM

(Laughs)

Isn't it amazing what a little TLC will do?

PAULA

I wonder how he did it?

(SAM and JAMIE look at each other and laugh)

What did I say?

SAM

Nothing, Paula.

JAMIE

It's a private joke.

PAULA

Fine. I have a few private jokes of my own.

SAM

You do, huh?

PAULA

Yeah, and they're funny too.

SAM

I hope so.

JAMIE

I wish I didn't have to go.

PAULA

Can't you stay?

JAMIE

No, sorry.

SAM

We'll just have to throw you a going away party. It'll be great. We'll sneak out tonight and borrow the truck...

PAULA

You're gonna get in trouble.

SAM

Not if anybody doesn't tell.

PAULA

What if I do?

SAM

Then you'll wish you hadn't.

PAULA

I will, huh?

(Stage is empty for a few moments. Off R a cry is

heard)

JIMMY

Okay, you can untie me now?!

(Pause)

Is anybody there? Hello? You guys didn't leave did you? Hello? Anybody? HELLO!

(LIGHTS FADE TO BLACK)