KING OF THE ROAD

I know an old truckie,bit soft in the head

He's got a steering wheel and two pedals attached to the bed

He may seem a dill,and he talks like a parrot

But way down in his heart he is twenty-two carat

His wife thinks he's mad,but he has quite a ball

As he blows the air horn that's screwed onto the wall

His C.B. set is fitted into his headboard

His wife reckons one day she will cut off his cord

He drives down to Melbourne in his sleep every night

Once he got in a skid and gave her quite a fright

She screamed"you silly old sod,don't you know how I feel?'

He said'shut uppa your face as he spun on the wheel

His roadranger (with splitter) comes up through the sheets

And instead of soft pillows he's got two driving seats

He tucks in his blankets like he's sheeting a load

He's known to his friends as 'The King of The Road'

If you say he's too slow he says 'Let me be the judgee'

'Whilst you went to Bathurst I did two trips to Mudgee'

When you mention the mountains he says 'Those little hills'

'I can get to Orange and back on a coke and two pills'

He's got twenty-two wheels and pulls thirty-eight tonne

He does not do it for money,just does it for fun

He's got deisel in his veins instead of red blood

When he's finished his trip he's always covered in mud

His uniform is blue vest,shorts,and dirty old thongs

He drinks Tooheys old beer and sings truck driving songs

The song ''I've been everywhere" was written just for him

And he'll tell you when the Black Stump dented his rim

Whilst most other families go out for a barbie

His heads under the bonnet adjusting the carbie

And on Sunday morning instead of Kellogs corn flakes

He's lying under his truck adjusting the brakes

His wife longs for the day when he lets go of the wheel

And comes home every night to a warm bed and a meal

And she won't have to worry about that dreaded phone call

That poor old Joe (Rest his soul) has run his truck up a wall

By Eddie The Pom