| Dear Honorable Professors, I am writing you for the purpose of stating my mission, in the hopes that I may gain admittance to the Accelerated Degree Program in English. This being my first year returned to the pursuits of higher education, I was pleased to learn of the initiation of such a program and have relished the thought that I may be among the select few, chosen to take part in such a challenging venture. Unfortunately, desire alone is not enough to persuade you of the reasons that make me the ideal student for this program, thus I must state to what ends my participation would be. This requires an appraisal of my previous education as well as the events that led me to this area of study, while taking into account the boundaries that limit the length of this letter I shall keep such history as brief as possible. The course of my education has been a long journey of self-discovery, filled with many of life's unplanned rest stops along the way. I had begun like most freshmen; raw and overwhelmed by the numerous choices that laid before me like the old fashioned roundhouses of railroad's glory days. |
| Sample Mission Statement |
| A college student needed help writing a mission statment as part of an accelerated degree program application. The guidelines called for this mission statement to focus on personal goals and be under three hundred words. The following long and circuitous example is what was submitted to me: |
| Original Mission Statement |
| Poloproofed Mission Statement |
| After a three year absence, I have returned to ***** University. I now hope to be among the select students to participate in the Accelerated Degree Program in English. I am going to become an English teacher. Happily, I can now state this with conviction, as I was not always sure of my purpose. Over the years, however, I have found myself returning to the classroom as both a formal student and a seeker of knowledge for knowledge's sake. In fact, I used to often say "I want to go to school for the rest of my life." This statement is still true, the only difference being that I wish to continue learning through teaching. Due in part to the influence of previous teachers, I learned to find joy in the learning process. The best teachers are the best lifelong students, and I know that *****'s Accelerated Degree Program will ensure that as a teacher I too can foster a love for learning in my future students. |
| THE PROJECT: |
| THE STATEMENT: -Too wordy. -Tries too hard to impress. - A bit obsequious.. -Too much information on the past. -Usage errors. -Has no focus. |
| THE NEEDS: -Deep content editing and proofreading. |
| THE SOLUTION: -I'll let it speak for itself. (He got into the program, by the way.) |
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