(“Prayer” opening, Dick Broccoli and Tara Fisher are at ringside. Dick is dressed as a mummy, Tara as a vampire.)
Dick: Happy Halloween everyone, and welcome to FPPVW Foundation, here in the FPPVW arena.
Tara: The perfect place to go for wrestling that doesn’t suck.
Dick: Unlike you.
(“Sad but True” hits and Joey Sprinklers makes his way to the ring.)
Tara: Ignoring that, we’re all set for the show to start.
(Joey grabs a mic)
Joey: Ay, what’s goin on here? I know it’s Halloween and everything, but when I get here I see my name on the booking board, but I don’t see any opponent. For some reason I don’t get to know who I’m wrestling? What kind of mystery opponent shows up for the first match of the night? There’s not much mystery there.
Dick: He does have a point. Unless he’s got a very good costume, the mystery won’t last long.
Joey: Well whoever ya are, you better get your ass out here fast, ‘cause I’m in no mood to play.
(“Lets All Go to the Lobby” hits, and a man in a full black hood enters the arena, selling small trick or treat bags on his way to the ring)
Joey Sprinklers vs. Mystery Opponent
Finish: The Mystery Opponent puts on the Hot Pretzel with Mustard, but Joey crawls to the ropes. When the ref tries to break the hold, Joey reaches for his skateboard and swings. He knocks Mystery Opponent out cold, and the ref calls for the bell.
Winner: Mystery Opponent by disqualification. Match Rating: 62
(Joey continues to beat Mystery Opponent down as the commercial break starts)
(“During the break” footage of the continued beat down, culminating in a Da Sprinklinator onto the skateboard, breaking it apart.)
Tara: Sprinklers trying to take out the, uh, masked man. He was taken to the back by EMTs just a few moments ago, we’ll keep you updated on his condition.
Dick: While the doctors are checking on him, maybe they can unlock the secret of his identity…
Tara: Oh shut up, we all know who it was.
Dick: We do?
(“Pajamarama” starts and Huh walks out, dressed as Santa Claus)
Dick: Wha…what were we talking about?
Tara: I think Huh is a little confused.
Dick: He’s always a little confused, I think tonight he’s just plain wacko.
(“Fuel” starts and Jay Crowe makes his way to the ring)
Jay Crowe vs. Huh
Finish: Huh hits the Windbreaker and climbs up the ropes for a moonsault. He stalls to give the crowd a “Ho ho ho!” giving Jay time to recover, sneaking up underneath Huh to deliver a powerbomb for the pin.
Winner: Jay Crowe by pin Match Rating: 62
(Backstage, Nykk is pacing back and forth in front of Joey Sprinklers and Kevin Stone)
Nykk: What the hell? For the past couple weeks you two have nothing but fail! Kevin, you lose to Matt F’n Stryker in his first F’n match! This guy waltzes in straight from the nothingness of America’s “Heartland’ and is getting wins on MY F’N SHOW? The next week you both lose to him and his nothing tag team partner. Do you have any idea what this is making my promotion look like? (He steps up to Joey) Today you couldn’t even beat a beer guy in a crappy mask! What do you have to say for yourself?
Joey: Well… I was throwin’ down dice in the alley and Officer Leroy comes up and says, “Hey, I thought I told you…” and I’m like, “Yeah, what up!”
Nykk: (ignores this and steps to the left, looking at Kevin instead) What do you have to say for yourself?
Kevin: Uh….
Nykk: Any excuse at all?
Kevin: Well I…
Nykk: Any reason I should keep you in this stable?
Kevin: I’m sure I…
Nykk: Anything that should keep me from firing your ass right now?
Kevin: (Looks down) Sorry boss…
Nykk: Don’t be sorry, do something about it. You’re going to have one more match with those two at November Pain. Wins, losses, I don’t care, just make an impact! Whatever happens, I want you to be remembered, and I want you remembered as the ones standing over a broken Matt Stryker and Chad Collyer! (He storms out, leaving Joey and Kevin alone to think things over)
Segment Rating: 69
(Commercial Break)
(Matt Stryker is in the ring, “Fuel” hits and Dusty Schneble makes his way to the ring)
Matt Stryker vs. Dusty Schneble
Finish: Jay Crowe runs to ringside and grabs Matt’s foot. Matt goes to the outside and chases Jay a lap around the ring. Dusty sneaks out and charges when Matt is in view, but Matt ducks and throws Dusty into a ringpost. Pulling Dusty in the ring he hits a quick piledriver and gets a pin.
Winner: Matt Stryker by pin Match Rating: 64
(Joey Sprinklers and Kevin Stone storm the ring with chairs and take out Matt quickly, stomping him as both Pyro Twins join in. Chad rushes in but Kevin spears him and the attack of all four heels shifts.)
Dick: Matt and Chad are in deep here, we need to get some help.
(Refs storm the ring to try and separate everyone)
Tara: We need to take one last commercial break, we’ll be right back.
(Commercial Break)
(Cheesecake is hanging out in the dressing room, dressed in drag. Huh walks in, still dressed as Santa.)
Cheesecake: Well Ho ho…ho.
Huh: Stop that, it’s been a hard day.
Cheesecake: Awww, I’m th’orry. Here, why do’th’n’t Th’anta th’it on my lap for a change.
Huh: Wha?
Cheesecake: Nothing. Th’o what do you want to do tonight?
Huh: We can go downtown and look for a bar.
Cheesecake: Oh, ye’th, I thought you’d never a’th’k. I’m dre’th’ed for it and everything.
Huh: Yeah, that’s a great Halloween costume.
Cheesecake: Hallowhat?
Segment Rating: 63
(“Seven Nation Army” hits and Alan Mayse makes his way to the ring.)
Tara: It’s been building for some time, Alan Mayse, the first FPPVW champion, and Ronin Fox, who has come close but never captured the gold.
Dick: It built a lot faster the past couple weeks when Alan made the bold statement that Fox is in the pocket of the Heel Stable.
(“Wherever I May Roam” hits and Ronin Fox runs to the ring, immediately brawling with Alan before the bell)
Alan Mayse vs. Ronin Fox
Finish: Fox sets up for the Tail End, but Alan hooks the ropes and pulls away. Fox follows Alan to the outside and they brawl into the crowd. When they make their way back to ringside, Alan sets up for a tiger bomb on the concrete, Fox reverses into a backdrop and rolls into the ring to stop the count. Alan grabs a chair and slides in. The ref tries to hold him back as Fox slides out and gets a chair of his own. Fox shoves the ref aside and Alan and Fox do dueling chairs. Both end up connecting at once and collapsing as the bell rings.
Winner: None, double disqualification. Match Rating: 75
Tara: This match has been thrown out after the referee completely lost control.
Dick: And I don’t think either of them got this out of their system.
Tara: What does Jon Z think of this?
(Copyright)
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2003 Future Pay Per View Wrestling
