· Describe the behavior or situation in a matter-of-fact way.

· Do not label the child with terms such as: aggressive, bully, rowdy, shy, or selfish. Instead try "Sally hit several children today."

· Tell the parent how you are handling the problem during the day.

· Ask the parent not to punish the child for incidents that occurred at your home, but try to work on causes, and to respond to problems that occur at home.

· Keep the parent informed.

· Try not to react defensively or in anger. Try to communicate in a clear, level manner.

· Ask for clarification until you understand exactly what the concern is.

· Rephrase the concern in your own words to be sure you completely understand the problem.

· Express your understanding of the parent's feelings.

· Explain your policy or position on the complaint.

· Try to reach an agreement.

· Maintain confidentiality.

· If the complaints continue and there seems to be no common ground, consider referring the parent elsewhere.

· Emphasize the positive.

· Never discuss problems with the child in front of the child.

· Know your limits. Be honest about what you can and cannot do.

· Ask open-ended questions.

· Always welcome parental visits.

· Always keep communications absolutely confidential.