True, and not so true. We also need to recognize that, until we honor ourselves with love and compassion, we will not be able to give fully to another, or shine the light on another - nor will we truly understand humility.
These simply steps will take you on a path to honoring your uniqueness every day. Use them as a way to see how you are doing. Celebrate what is working, and choose to make adjustments where there is adjustment necessary.
1. Take time for quiet daily. Yes, there is much that needs to get done. Once you maintain a habit of being quiet either to contemplate, pray, or meditate, you will be amazed how much more efficiently you will perform your tasks, duties and projects.
2. Treat yourself with as much care, if not more, than you treat others. Love and nurture yourself as you love and nurture those around you OR as you would LIKE to nurture those around you. Once you master caring for yourself, caring for others will become effortless and spring from the heart instead of from duty.
3. Accept compliments from others with grace. Never, ever disrespect the person you are complimenting by disregarding or negating their compliment. Instead, accept it as you would a treasure box or a long-awaited gift. Be grateful they can see something extra special about you!
4. Spend time investing in and cultivating close friendships. Incorporate friend-building activities into your daily routine. Exercise with a friend, share meals together, keep in touch with a brief email or 10 minute daily phone call. (Time the call and KEEP the appointment.)
5. Surround yourself with beauty. Honor your home by decorating as a way to express who you are at your core. If you are bold, use bold colors and accessories. Light scented candles, listen to music you love, use soaps that are lathery and smell great. Go for the multi-sensory approach.
6. Give joyfully and receive with open arms. Recognize that giving and receiving are on the same continuum and not separate at all! Learning to give completely translates into receiving more than you could ever plan or expect to receive. The results take care of themselves.
7. Become a part of a larger community. This may mean a mastermind group or it may be a circle of friends or a book discussion group. Connect yourself with people who share your interests, goals and vision for the world. Synergy will empower you incredibly when you join in a community where you can equally give and receive on a very regular basis.
8. Mentor someone simply for the pleasure of observing and becoming involved in their growth. Invite someone who does not have the same level as skills as you do along for the ride with you. Listen to their input and see what you can create together. Chances are you will learn a lot from them (and vice versa!) creating both a Win/Win situation as well as learning about your own strengths and weaknesses in the process.
9. Live a purposeful, vision, values, cause-oriented life. Recognize and embrace that you are creating your life as a masterful artist each and every day. You can choose each day whether you want to simply let life happen each day or if you want to create it fully. Choose the latter.
10. Love yourself with all your heart, soul, and strength without attachment to what you are achieving in your life today. Be compassionate and understanding while also standing firm in the knowledge that you are both incredibly unique and incredibly capable. When you can master this balance, being attached to your outcomes is not an issue because you will be achieving outcomes beyond your own imagination. You will be so magnetic you will wonder where YOU have been all this time! The answer? You are RIGHT there, ready and waiting to follow these simple principles.
*Submitted by Carol
*****
It's in our nature to want to grow - to experience new things, to learn, to test ourselves, to be stimulated both mentally and physically. When we deny ourselves the opportunity to grow, this can cause us to become unsatisfied with our lives, careers, and our relationships.
We can get so caught up in our roles and daily routines that we neglect our needs as individuals. Over time this can lead to a general sense of dissatisfaction and even depression. Sometimes we have no idea why we feel this way and begin looking for fulfillment in negative, even destructive ways - jumping from job to job, over-eating, irresponsible spending, extramarital affairs, etc..
It's surprising how little it takes to feel good about ourselves if we make a point to recognize our needs as individuals and indulge ourselves from time to time. The problem is, many of us find it exceedingly difficult to make time for ourselves - we're forever putting the needs of our children, husbands, wives, and work ahead of our own personal needs.
This is understandable as we all want to be the perfect parent, the greatest husband or wife, the one who gets the promotion at work, etc. However, for us to be successful in those areas, we must find time to nurture ourselves as individuals. This need not be a major undertaking. Spending just a few minutes each day reading, working on a hobby or craft project, or just in quiet meditation can make all the difference in the world.
This doesn't necessarily have to be something you do alone. You can involve your partner and/or your children too. Learn a foreign language together, exercise together - take a family run or bike ride each evening, learn to roller-blade, ski, paint, play the guitar.
One thing my wife and I did was to learn how to country dance - swing, two-step, and the like. Neither of us were huge country music fans nor particularly graceful on the dance floor. However, we didn't let that stop us. This turned out to be a wonderful experience. Individually we were both challenged by learning new dance steps while trying hard not to crush each other's toes. As a couple this served as a great way to bring us even closer together - providing us with a shared, enjoyable experience.
The point is not so much what you do, but that you do something - anything. Spend some time remembering those things which you love to do but have let slip from your normal routine, then add one or more of those things back into your life. Or try something new and challenging - take a night class, learn the two-step (if your toes can take the abuse), or anything which you'd enjoy doing.
In our quest to be super moms and dads, great husbands and wives, the best employees, business owners, and/or homemakers, lets not forget to take a little time on a regular basis to be good to ourselves - to grow as individuals, to test ourselves, to learn something new, to be stimulated mentally and/or physically in a positive way. We can't be a shining light
for others if we don't tend the fire within.
*Submitted by Carol
Taking Care of You
By Catharine C. Harris
It takes a special person to care for other people's
children on a daily basis. This person must have
patience, dedication, determination, and love for
humanity. They must be able to consistently provide
loving care, even when there are circumstances that try
their patience. The key to providing this care is
knowing when to step away and knowing how to take care
of oneself.
Child-care providers are wonderful people, full of
patience and love. They are also human. This means
that they have bad days, get sick, feel cranky, and
have low tolerance for some issues. Don't beat
yourself up for being human. Instead, learn what works
for you, and learn to recognize your warning signs.
Make sure you are getting plenty of rest. Many
child-care providers take care of children around
the clock. Sure, the children they get paid to care
for leave at 5pm, but their own children are there long
after that time. They have household chores, homework
to help with, and scores of other functions to perform.
Find a sleeping schedule that works for you. If you
are well rested, there is less chance that you will
become ill, or be prone to mood swings. You will be
ready to tackle the situations of the day as they
arise.
This may take some work, but finding the right sleeping
schedule is a must. Wake up at the same time each day.
Adjust the time you go to bed until you find a time
that works with your waking up time.
Make sure you are meeting your health needs. Get
regular check-ups, eat a balanced diet, drink plenty of
liquids, and get regular exercise. Don't wait until you
are thirsty to drink water, by the time you feel
thirsty your body is on the way to being dehydrated.
Cut back on your caffeine intake if it makes your moods
fluctuate. Fruits and vegetables should be a part of
your daily diet. Choose foods that give you a healthy
pick-me-up, instead of a quick fix with caffeine and
chocolate.
Eliminate unneeded stress. Take care of small
situations before they turn into major upheavals. If
you are caring for a child who is cranky without a
morning nap, do whatever you can to make sure the child
gets the needed nap. If you are caring for a child that
throws temper tantrums that you find annoying, talk to
the parent right away. Don't wait until you are ready
to snap before bringing it up.
Know your limitations. If you are not feeling well,
you will not be doing the parents or the children a
favor in doing business-as-usual. If you are having a
bad morning, take some time to sit and focus on what is
making you stressed. Do your best to eliminate that
stress, even if it means calling the parents to pick up
the children. Your main concern should always be for
the children's emotional and physical safety.
Most days, child-care providers are full of patience
and do a wonderful job taking care of the children in
their charge. Child-care providers are not super-human,
but some parents expect them to be. Recognizing that
you need a break does not make you weak, nor does it
mean you have failed. Feel good about the choices you
make, even if one of those choices is the need for a
break. Never allow yourself to get to a breaking point.
Know when to step away, call parents, or ask a friend
to come over and help you. The children will benefit,
and the parents who understand that you are human
will appreciate the fact that you are honest and have
their child's best interest in mind.
*Submitted by Sherry