Chapter: July 2007

Very slpy. Juz came back from our 'project grp miting'. I had bn looking forward to it since last wk. Long time no c. I dun feel a sense of tireness until I reached hm, bath & sat in front of my comp.

From LC's conversation. I knew I'm nt mature enough to handle work and in fact I'm naive. No. 1 worry, if nxt Mon, I dun c any job response I posted today, I'm dead meat coz it was me who decide to take the gamble to post jobs at jobscentral. Y? Coz, jobscentral response is nt as gd as jobsdb or jobstreet. I used to visit only jobsdb and jobscentral to hunt for my job. Esp, for a job as 'rare' lik ours, the response is close to zero.

LC's exp muz haf bn fulfilling despite all the stress. I wun be able to handle stress lik ZE or LC's. ZE's workload is wat I can't imagine. LC's stress as well as her professionalism. She's already exercising confidentiality from wat we had learnt in our course. Sigh.. wat I had bn doing is juz peanut compared to them. If they r taking my job, I'm sure they'll be able to take it better than I do. I had bn making mistakes here and there sometimes due to my stubbornness.

I was given a proj in my co. I dunno if I can do it well. Things perhaps r nt as simple as it seems. With my lvl, I'm still far from there. In order, to proceed, if I can't even do my current work well, dun tink of ath else.

Very full... Big plate of chicken pasta. I reali haf no etiquette wif eating .. Wish time wun fly this fast so tt we can chat longer. It was already past 9 b4 I knew it.

End of the mth is the best of the mth coz it's a wk of salary release. Phew... Most imptly, I wld b able to go for my ex-poly classmates gathering which I had bn looking forward to. It had bn a long while since we last met probably since the graduation ceremony. Hopefuli, I can chop chop and leave on time tmr haha .

I had bn given a new task which I thot it's gg to be fun if it can gp smoothly provided tt minna-san will cooperate with the committee we had juz formed. Gt to tink of a name for the event we r gg to plan. I was given the same task during my SIP bt it was not possible for me to plan due to stress and the ridiculous workload given. Tis time rd, I shall do my best. Oso, I'm still learning. May the exp be fruitful.

Most boring wkend I had. No $$$, no kick, no motivation even if I go shopping. I wish I can haf more rest. Dragged my feet back hm aft work ytd to try hard to find time to slp.

Had bn stung by a mozzie which I was sure was aedes due to its white stripes. I slapped it away b4 it cld suck further. If I'm gg to haf fever within these few days, it had to be certainly dengue fever. Thanks to some stupid bus which can take abt 25 min to arrive.

I was late again tis wk thanks to the bus. I was sure I had bn waiting at the bus stop early enough. To tink I haf to wait 25min and ended up late for work. I juz can't swallow it, can't hlp feeling frustrated & pissed. Bcoz of the bus, my salary will be deducted. No pt waiting at the bus stop so early since I'll be late anw. It was reali unfair since we r earning nt much, company is giving us allowance time & yet I'm still late. Nt due to me waking up late or watsoever bt the bus ridiculous frequency. No amt of complaint will pacify me .

I'm ok with work. Ppl r treating me better no longer as hostile as initially. Will try my best nt to gt involved in the atrocious co politics. Can't hlp comparing certain things here with my SIP co. There were pros & cons anywhere. Julie is attending uni. Congrats! I wish I can go too. I juz miss a bit (reali minute for my GPA) to qualify for a local uni. Tt's juz my luck. I'm trying my best to start saving $$$ for uni. Perhaps I'll study full-time. Sch time is always more fun than work. Gt to treasure the chance shld I be given 1 in future.

Fri the 13th... as said, nth I did today seems rite to me.

The ad I posted showed up in newspp today! Although tt was the ugliest. There's rm for improvement. Doing tasks related to HR always satisfies me coz tt was wat I studied. On the other hand, as I handles accounts, I reali dun lik it. Gg aft ppl for $$$ is nt my cup of tea esp wif my temper, I gt pissed rather easily. I was almost gg to flare up if I continued to make calls due to some 'ball passing' situation. Nvm, I'll let my mgr noe & mayb *cross my fingers* she'll take the case. My mgrs has more powers hence r able to chase paymt more effectively.

As for today, y nth seems rite. It din occur to me tt my wrkplc is a restricted area. Ordering KFC was a little troublesome. I shld haf heed my mgr advice to order the day b4. I reali made a blunder. Nt everywhere is lik my SIP co. Each and every wrkplc has its pros & cons. When ST toks abt her mgr's b'day. I recalled tt my ex-supervisor actuali tried to giv us a b'day surprise bt (we noe bt played along). I appreciated her effort. My current co apparently dun haf tis. Boss wants me to provides suggestions to improve our employee handbk. Perhaps, b'day shld b 1 of the welfare to be given. Even if there's no cake, there ought to b red packet. Staff lik us nid motivation. To me, it's a challenge. I shall giv it a shot. My mgr warned me nt to b too disappointed if my ideas was nt taken. I shld haf recalled more on wat I had learnt haha!

I hope I din fall under the 'curse of praise'. Ytd, my mgr juz praised me for the AR. I din dare to accept by adding in "No lah, I ..." Once in a while, being praise feels gd bt yet, I'm worried abt the 'side effect'. It starts today, tt's y everything seems so wrong. Toking in ZE taught me a lot. Minna-san seems to be so admirable. I gt lots to learn. Curbing my temper is 1 thing.

Off to slp! Looking forward to movie with Ina & Shan tmr!

I nid an off day. I reali haf no time to finish my stuff at hm. Loads of crds & fig lying ard for me to clear them. Sigh... Then I haf my rm to clean, DVDs to watch. I wish I haf 48hrs a day. I absolutley haf no mood to slp, neither to say, work.

I wonder wat happened to my colleagues. As soon as a new colleagues joined us, I was able to blend into their grp. All thanks to my new colleague. Hw funny. Bt I noe, life's better when u haf some1 2 tok to. Of coz, MSN is my main channel during wrking hrs. Dun lik calling ppl up for debts bt wish to minimise it. Ppl comes up wif all sorts of excuses lik invoices missing, din receive tis & tt. Thanks 2 my mgr, I saved myself when they accuses me of tt coz, I left proof of my wrk as taught by her. Unless the evidence reflects tt I din wrk.

Went to rebond my hair. I felt stupid tt it din occur to me tt a package of rebonding consists of cut, treatment & rebond. I forgotten abt it. So I went thru it w/o treatment. Feeling pissed to hear abt xtra charges 4 treatmt & cut. tt only means tt it's very ex ! I shld haf went bck to Bedok & do bt due to time constraint, I haf to make do wif it. I nid my fringe to be cut bt it seems tt the hairstylists no matter where I go disagree wif it. Very pissed. Dun let me cut, I'm gg to cut it somewhere else. Even shopping wif friends, was difficult as we dun haf enuff time. Time flies, in no time, it's already nitetime! ... Nw off to bed... *sobs*