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| Milkcan |
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 | *BUM BUM BUM BUM* |
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| Screenwriter |
 | Hello and welcome to the channel 5 six o'clock news at 7. |
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| Screenwriter |
 | First up in our daily broadcast, seven lucky people in the entire world know what Jeff Hibiki is talking about. |
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| Screenwriter |
 | No, wait, make that eight, another otaku has just got a glimpse at Excel Saga. |
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| Screenwriter |
 | We're going out into the field with Channel 5's own Mima Kirigoe. Mima? |
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| Mima |
 | Thank you, Screenwriter. It's a madhouse down here in town square, Spike Spiegal seems to be out and about in our town! |
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| Mima |
 | Let's see if we can get a word. Mr. Spiegal? Mr. Spiegal? |
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| Nabeshin |
 | I'm not Spike Spiegal! LEAVE ME ALONE! |
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