jealousypart2

Buffy’s mouth snapped shut in shock. Spike glared daggers at Harmony who continued her tirade.

“That’s right. You think I don’t know what you two are doing here practically three times a week. But I do. I finally figured it out.”

“You figured it out?” Buffy exclaimed, finding her voice just as Spike was mustering a response of his own. “About me and Spike…about Spike and I? You figured THAT out?”

“Yes, I did!” Harmony confirmed. “Because I’m not as dumb as I look.”

“Well, you couldn’t possibly be…” Buffy said, gently. She was holding one hand to her brow as if warding off a migraine. Only her slightly shaking shoulders betrayed how close she was to rolling on the floor with laughter.

“…but it IS brave of you to keep trying like this,” Buffy continued, when she could speak again.

“Now, Harm,” Spike intervened, hoping to bring this farce to a swift and happy conclusion but Buffy held up a hand to forestall him.

“No,” she said, with almost perfect control on her inner child. “Don’t even bother, Spike! I mean, there’s no reason to deny it any longer. We can finally tell the truth about our love. HARMONY here has it all figured out.”

“I’m glad she knows. Really!” Buffy continued. She crossed over to Spike’s side and sank onto his lap. She slipped one arm along his shoulders and snuggled close with a tiny sigh. “No more sneaking out in the light of day. No more pretending that we loathe one another.”

Spike’s mouth twitched as his sense of the absurd kicked in. He didn’t stop to consider the risks he ran in confessing his sins. He just slipped his arms around Buffy’s waist and drew her a little closer.

“Yeah, it’s a bloody load off my mind I can tell you,” he said, into her hair. “No more hiding our special mementos all over the crypt. I was running out of really clever places.”

“Oh My GOD!” Harmony exclaimed, obviously shocked to her core. “I can’t believe you’re just coming out and admitting it like this! I thought you might have the decency to deny it. I mean, Spike you’re a Vampire and you…well…you’re the SLAYER.”

She said the last word like it was the most appalling aberration imaginable and shuddered slightly at the imagery.

“The love that dare not speak its name,” Spike said, barely able to contain himself.

Buffy, holding on to her composure by her fingernails, bit down hard on her lip and turned her face into Spike’s shoulder at this pronouncement.

“Euuwww!” Harmony said, totally missing the joke. “How can you even say…that? It’s just so…icky! And when I think that I came here to get you back…”

“Back! Ha!” Buffy bristled. Leaping off of Spike’s lap, she took up a threatening pose and scowled at Harm. “I’d like to see you try?”

“You two have it out,” Spike said, standing up behind Buffy, “and I promise to go quietly with whoever wins.”

Buffy turned a surprised look on him. Spike had his arms crossed. He was leaning back slightly relaxed in the knees, cocky and self-assured. He gave her an almost imperceptible wink. Without warning Buffy turned and strode over to the weapons bench. Snatching up a stake she gave it a practiced twirl and addressed the lady vamp.

“Well, what do you say, Harmony?” Buffy said, in a dark tone. “You think you can take me?”

Harmony’s eyes were wide and focused on the sharpened piece of wood in Buffy’s capable hands. The night was certainly not going the way she’d planned. She held up one hand in supplication as she struggled for words.

“Uhm…I…uhmm!” Harmony said. Buffy dropped into a fighting stance and began to circle her. Spike watched the Slayer with undiluted admiration, a small smile playing on his slightly parted lips.

“Look, Buffy, you and I have known each other for a long, long time,” Harmony continued, with equal measures of desperation and forced sweetness. “I mean we were in High School together…and everything.”

“We hated each other in High School, you imbecile,” Buffy snarled, feigning a lunge.

“Okay…I guess…” Harmony agreed, jumping half out of her skin. She looked desperately over at Spike and was suddenly hit with a lightning bolt of inspiration. “But my point is, I have known YOU a lot longer than I’ve known Spike.”

She hissed out the male vampire’s name.

“And just between us girls,” she continued, in a confidential whisper, totally ignoring the fact that Spike was within easy earshot, “it hasn’t been all that earthshaking an experience being with him anyway. If you know what I mean?”

Buffy straightened slightly. She raked Spike up and down with an appraising glance taking a good measure of the cockiness out of him.

“No!” He growled, angrily, giving Harm the look that kills. “We don’t know what you mean!”

“I’m talking about the SEX, Spike,” Harmony clarified, helpfully. She turned back to Buffy who was now having a truly wonderful time.

“Oh, do tell?” the Slayer encouraged. Spike transferred his blue-eyed glare to her.