AUTHOR: Rae
CATEGORY: V, MSR, S
RATING: PG
SPOILERS: Everything up to and including Season 7
especially "Requiem"
DISCLAIMER: All of the characters herein belong to the
creative genius of CC, 1013 Productions and Fox Studios.
I promise to put them back right where they were left them in
May.
DISTRIBUTION: Yes, just please keep my name and this heading
with it. It would also be appreciated if you would let me
know so I may come and visit you.
FEEDBACK: Please. I beg of you. There is no shame in
begging...
ultimatexffan@hotmail.com
MANY THANKS: to all who encouraged me to finish the story
and post it...Molly, Tiffany and of course Duke!!!! Huge kudos
to my beta reader Nikki! :)

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Seven months. And each day that she doesn't find him - or proof
that he is alive and well somewhere else, she dies inside a little
more. She likes to believe that she is strong and that she will
survive this because she has always overcome whatever has been
forced upon her.

But I know the truth. She is breaking. She has lost her strength.
No. She hasn't lost it, it was taken from her. I fear that she
will loose her will to fight without him. I want to believe that
I am wrong, but something tells me that I am not.

She is my daughter and I know her. She is not an enigma to me.
A mother knows her child. She knows what lives in the hearts
of the souls she bore. And Dana will soon discover this truth
on her own. Just six weeks left, and the life inside her will show
her how deep and strong a mother's love is.

I jump from my seat when I hear the pounding on the door.
It's frantic and incessant. As I open the door, I feel the
blood drain from my face.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The door swung open abruptly and I stood facing Maggie Scully.

I heard her gasp and my name slipped through her lips.

"Is she here? I've been looking all over for her, Mrs. Scully.
Do you know where she is?" I stop when I realize that I'm
yelling.

"Fox. OhmyGod! Come in. Come in. Yes, Dana is here. She's
resting. Are you okay? Where have you been?"

I know that she wants answers. I've been away since May.
But I can't answer her questions now. I just have
to see her. My Scully.

It's been so long and she was sick the last time I saw her.
I want to believe that she is well and whole; that in loving
her, I gave her something tangible to hold onto in my absence.
She's the reason I fought so hard to come back. It wasn't
easy. But I'm here now and all I want is to see her, to hold her. I
miss the smell of her hair. The feel of her skin - so soft and warm.
I've been so cold without her for the past forever. Each new
day was met with longing and heartache. If I can just look into
her eyes, I'll know that everything is right with the world once
again. I'll be able to fight once again. Or maybe it's time to
stop. Maybe it's time to just hold each other close and let
ourselves go with the feelings we had just started to allow
ourselves to experience.

Then her words hit me. Resting? Why? It's the middle of the
day. "Is she sick? Where is she? I have to see her."

"She's upstairs in bed Fox. She's been waiting for you."

I hardly hear her last words as I take the stairs two at a time.
All I think about is holding her close. Feeling her breath on my
cheek. I long to have her soft body close to mine.

I reach the top of the staircase and slowly walk towards the spare
bedroom. The door is already slightly ajar, so I quietly ease it
open the rest of the way.

I see her then, lying on the bed beneath the blankets, hugging
a pillow. I slowly walk towards her, careful not to make a sound.
She looks so peaceful and I'm starting to feel better just knowing
that I can see her. As I reach the side of the bed, I kneel to the
floor so that my face is level with hers. It is then that I see
dried trails of tears running down the length of her face.

Oh Scully, I'm so sorry. I didn't know that I was the one they
wanted. I never would have left you if I had known.

Sensing my presence, she stirs and opens her eyes.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Oh no. Not this dream again. Not the one where he looks so real.
Where it seems that I can just reach out and touch him. I've been
without him for so long now. My Mulder.

There are so many things I have to tell you. I want to believe that
you will return and we can embark on this new road together.
You've already missed so much.

The first sonogram...The first heartbeat...The first kick. How many
other firsts will you miss? Will you still be gone when our child
takes its first breath? Cries the first cry in this cold and unjust
world? How will I ever shield our baby from the evil? This was a
journey meant to be taken by us both and now I am alone.

The tears start anew. I thought I had cried myself dry. As they
fall hot from my eyes, you reach toward me to wipe them away
and I can almost believe that I am feeling your touch. It has been
so long since I felt you, since I heard your voice. It's getting
more and more difficult each day to conjure your image in my
mind. Oh God this hurts! I just want to sleep the nondreaming
sleep. To slip into the oblivion where the pain subsides for a few
brief hours.

"Oh Mulder. I've prayed for you to return to me. And you always
do, but only in my dreams. I've learned to be more specific when
asking The Heavens for my only desire."

"And someone finally listened. I'm here Scully. It's me. Feel my
hand caress your face. Feel my breath whisper against your skin.
Does this feel like a dream?"

"You're really here?" I hear myself ask. And then I see the
talisman. My cross hangs from his neck. It's something I've
never seen in my dreams. It's the proof of his presence here
before me, something tangible to hold onto, and I finally let
myself believe.

end of part 1

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I begin crying in earnest now. Not out of heartache, but out
of joy. Mulder has been returned to me and even though he
is inches from my face, we are still too far away. I reach for
him and wrap my arms around his neck, bringing his lips to
mine.

Our first kiss in many months is tender and sweet,
but soon grows in passion. Before I realize what is
happening, I feel Mulder's hands all over me. As his
fingers sweep across my swollen belly he draws back in shock.

"I guess there are some things I've got to tell you." I look up to
see Mulder staring at me in total amazement.

"I don't even care how this happened. I never thought it would
be possible after...but you're, I mean we're gonna have a baby??"

"I know, Mulder. It seems so contrived after all that we have
learned, but it's true, and it's real, and it's you and me. This is
what has kept me going. Knowing that part of you has been
growing in me. Feeling this baby, our baby, move has given
me purpose and my life substance while you've been gone."

I look into the depth of his hazel eyes and seeing the love and
wonder there, I pull him up close to me so that we lay spooning
on the bed trying to reconnect and find each other.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I know that I shouldn't have, but I did. I'm not ashamed of myself
as I slowly back away from the door and head back down the stairs
to give them the privacy they deserve.

Of course I'm happy that Dana's heart will begin to heal now that
Fox has been restored to her. It makes me smile knowing he will
be there to hold her hand when she experiences the pain and wonder
of childbirth. I am pleased that they will be a complete family
that will continue to depend upon each other and shelter each
other from the dangers of the world beyond these walls.

So of course I'm happy, but I'm also worried. She was taken once
before and even more recently, Fox disappeared for a few months.
I can only hope that they will not have to live through another
separation, but even more so, I hope the child will be spared.

My prayer for these souls is that they may now live out the
remainder of their days in a manner of normalcy that they have
yet to experience.

So I kneel before the fire in the hearth and clutch my Rosary close
to my heart. As I begin to chant the mantra, I can't help but feel
that my prayers fall upon deaf ears.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I hold her tight. It feels so good to have my arms wrapped around
her once again. I'm going to have to get used to holding more of
Scully. This dream is one that I never allowed myself to ponder.
I never thought it possible for the two of us to be parents. But
then again, at one time I never thought it possible for the two of
us to be in a position to become parents.

I nose my way through her hair until I feel my lips brush up
against the skin of her neck. As I softly drop little kisses
along her tender skin, I can't help but be thankful to whatever
powers allowed me to return so that I may be a part of this most
wonderful experience.

We have so much to do to prepare for the arrival of this little
innocent, but right now, I just don't want to move.

"Scully?"

"Yeah?"

"When is the baby due?"

"Six weeks. You made it back just in time."

I start to run my fingers up and down her arm - trying to convey
the depth of my love through my touch.

Parents. I can't believe that we're going to be responsible
for the life of another human being. Every decision we make
will ultimately affect this child.

"Scully?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm going to be a daddy."

"It's a great feeling, isn't it, Mulder?"

Even though she can't see me, I smile in answer to her
question.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It took everything in my power to convince them that returning him
would be in everyone's best interest. I had to explain countless
times that he was not the answer. The truth they sought was still
unobtainable, but will be arriving in just a few short weeks.

I'll give them enough time so that they feel comfortable and safe,
and when they least expect it, I'll make my move once again
shattering their world and all the illusions they will once again
come to trust as truth. I'll show them just how intangible one's
world can be.

END

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Thanks for reading!

all of my fanfic can be found at:
http://www.oocities.org/rachellee7/fanfic.html

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