Love, More Than A Feeling

Kool Stuff
By Meer

Love, More Than A Feeling

We have all been in what we believe was love . Our hearts pounded when the object of our affections came around, we waited by the phone for that call, sometimes we couldn't think of a darn intelligent thing to say when they were with us. It was great, so we thought, then 4-6 months in came the big break-up. You could now see them for who they really are. You could see all the promises they made and never kept. How could you have fallen for this person! What a jerk!

How could you have fallen for them? Because we had no clue what love was. we thought love was a feeling, big mistake. Love is action

Usually around 4-6 months in a relationship, the ardor of romance begins to wear thin and it is at this point that we are at love's crossroad.

We could choose to let go of the person based on their faults and misrepresentations or we can choose to love them anyway and work on the relationship. When we choose to stay and do the work, this is when real love kicks in.

Love is a choice not a feeling. How many times has some kind soul wanted to get to know you better but you declined based on something physical or their lack of income or what have you?? Love is a choice.

The work of love requires that we put our needs second to our mate and to the relationship. That means hanging up the phone when our love needs us or switching off "the game" when our love needs us, putting down the book when our love needs us.

The work of love requires us to stop trying to change them, control, manipulate, possess, smother, criticize, judge them. They are on their own path, accept this.

The work of love requires us to realize that a relationship is a sacred gift given to you so you can work to heal "you" not them.

The work of love requires you to understand this person is a mirror for you. If you like what you see great. If you dislike what you see great. Fix it (the "it" meaning you).

The work of love requires you to detach from broken relationships and realize that the person you are dealing with is not your enemy but a teacher. You and that person decided long ago to come together and work on your issues.

The work of love requires you to love self. If you are not loving, supportive, caring, gentle, accepting, tolerant of self, you cannot be these things for others.

The work of love requires you to nurture and sustain yourself since if you give nothing to yourself you will have nothing to give to others thus anger, resentment, and illness.

The work of love requires you to check yourself and be honest with yourself. Are you a person who is "passive dependent?" M. Scott Peck describes this person as: "someone so busy seeking to be loved that they have no energy left to love. They are like starving people, scrounging around wherever they can for food, and with no food of their own to give to others." Are you so desperate for love or so afraid to be with yourelf that you settle for anything rather than to have nothing?

The work of love requires you to understand that you can never be alone because there is always you.

All this and so much more is love and the work love requires and it is all action oriented and choice motivated.

You will attract love and more love but if you are not working on you with forgiving and releasing will it be the love you really want and deserve?

-Author Unknown

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