ALLTEL 'Are You Connected?' Tour 2002
23 FEBRUARY, 2002 – NEW BERLIN, WISCONSIN
Happy Saturday! I have just begun my third tour with GMR; our new client is ALLTEL communications, and our team of five will be traversing most of the south and east spreading the good word of communication technology! Our team is absolutely wonderful and I am excited about this year’s new experiences; new people, new places, new client, new stories to tell! Over the last two months I have been beyond uncommunicative, you have my apology if you think I have been neglecting or avoiding you. I did quite a bit of traveling during my break, and made the point of enjoying the solitude of my own company. When you make a living by talking to thousands of people every day, the adage ‘silence is golden’ is truly appreciated. However, I am back now and ready to go! I hope you’ll tag along and check in every now and then to read about my adventures for the coming year! As the weeks progress, I am planning to add several new photos to the page in the form of photo galleries, so your patience is appreciated as I play around and figure all this out.
Back in the land of beer, cheese, and brats; Milwaukee has been interesting as always. I was contemplating moving here for a few months to gain more work experience, but in all honesty I need a city where people will dance. I’m quite serious. Four of us went out last night to find the Milwaukee night life and found a lot of other things, but not what we’d expected. As KB, a friend, said, ‘Welcome to Wisconsin; we don’t dance, we just stand around and drink all night.’ We went to four different bars and only found some good music and atmosphere at number four at around 12.30 or 1.00. The crew is hoping for some serious booty shaking this year, so better luck down south!
27 FEBRUARY, 2002 – LITTLE ROCK, ARKANSAS
Who comes to Arkansas? I do, apparently, but only because I’m being paid to be here. You know the old adage that travel is an opportunity to discover the places you come to adore as well as those you would never set foot in again? Little Rock qualifies as the latter. I don’t know what else to say about this, I can’t find the verbal NutraSweet to make my assessment more palatable. It’s Arkansas. In spite of the friendly people and the cool local hangouts, it’s Arkansas and there is nothing I can do to refute the pretty soundly earned stigma. I think it’s my fatigue talking in part; we’ve been in conference rooms learning obscene amounts of information, stuffing ourselves with restaurant food every night, just too little of the good stuff and too much of the unfulfilling.
17 MARCH – JACKSONVILLE, FLORIDA
Happy happy joy joy! Other than an ode to Stimpy, I am expressing my unequivocal joy over the last few days that I’ve spent in Jacksonville! I have become closer to my crewmates, I think I’ve made a new friend, and I’ve rediscovered a big part of my family. The five of us had a very hot, long weekend at the car show in Jacksonville, but I think that we bonded during that time and delved into each other’s personalities a bit deeper. Everyone is so unique and interesting to me; Kim is without a doubt my sister out here. She and I, apart from being the only girls on the tour, have so much in common with just enough differences to keep us on our toes. She is an amazing woman and I know she will play a huge hand in my experience out here this year. Jason is freakin’ fantastic; he is the youngest of the crew with more humor and spunky attitude than anyone! No one has made me laugh as much as Jason has these past three weeks! Kevin, our manager, is a former model/actor who, despite his serious demeanor, has an incredibly goofy side that always takes us by surprise! Andy is our bad ass truck driver; no one believed that Andy was our driver because he looks so young. Contradictory to his quiet persona, this guy has a penchant for karaoke like no one else; his specialty is the Bon Jovi catalog. He actually sang ‘It’s My Life’ on the stereo at an event the other day – he was amazing! Each of us has so much to offer the group, I’m very excited about our crew and the great times I’m sure we are to have this year! Oh, I forgot to mention Rodney. Rodney is not an official member of our crew, but for the past two weeks he has contributed as much to this tour as we have. Rodney’s job requires him to travel with newly launched tours and help them to create solutions to obstacles that come up and essentially help the tour run more smoothly. He has been a joy to be with both on and off the job, and we will miss him when he leaves us next week! Thanks Rodney!
The truly big news of this past week is with regards to my family. I met my brother and sister whom I have been estranged from for nearly 14 years. Wow! Dane and Courtney moved to Jacksonville with their mother Tracy shortly after our dad died in 1988, and other than one day in 1990, we have not seen each other since. I had decided long ago that if I was ever in Florida that I would call them up and try to meet; such a time came this week and I was true to my convictions. Any fears I may have had were allayed when Tracy, in spite of some obvious shock, welcomed me with open arms and encouraged Dane and Courtney to see me as often as possible during my stay. I had hoped but never expected such a rousing welcome, and when the day came to meet my brother and sister, there was nothing but anticipation and excitement in my heart. Seeing them after so long was the most surreal experience I have ever had. When I look at them I can still see the silhouettes of their small, childish faces, though Courtney is as tall as me now and Dane is a formidable 6’3”. It seems incredibly obvious to me that we are related; our mannerisms, our sense of humor, expressions, physical features, all hints at something common among us. I love them with such a passion, I can only hope that they now know that their sister has always loved them and is always here for them.
18 MARCH – ORANGEBURG, SOUTH CAROLINA
Kim and I have stopped for the evening somewhere on I-26. Orangeburg, South Carolina, I’m told. We chose this particular location because we are taking our time to our final destination (Bristol, TN) and there is a Cracker Barrel at this exit. The South is a blessing if for no other reason than that you can’t swing a dead cat without hitting a Cracker Barrel. This is a beautiful thing, though I will have to be careful about how often I’m taking in those pancakes…
24 MARCH – BRISTOL, TENNESSEE
Bristol could very well be the redneck capital of the world, though no official consensus has been made. There was so much camouflage being worn at the race, I thought there was a gun show or Michigan Militia rally going on. Most people were incredibly nice, but we were desperate to get the hell out of Tennessee!
28 MARCH – GULF SHORES, ALABAMA
What a week this has been! Kim and I road tripped down to Grandma and Grandpa Brown’s place after Bristol for a much deserved week off. Every day has been marked by one type of adventure or another: a trip to Jesse’s in Magnolia Springs for their famous Caesar salad with pecan encrusted catfish and New Zealand wines; visited Stacy’s Rexall Drug store and old fashioned soda fountain for dollar sandwiches and two dollar ice cream sundaes; sat in the soft sand and crocheted scarves; cruised the massive outlet mall for the odd find; heaps of small moments that have made one great time. Grandma and pa have been beyond gracious to us both – Kim is quite smitten and immensely entertained by my family. I can’t blame her though, they’re unique and funny and every bit a part of me! Pat and Les rock the house; they are the best grandparents any girl could ask for! They know how to spoil just enough to make you feel special without turning you into a brat. Grandma knows how to make the best pies on the planet and how to put the perfect squeeze into a hug; Grandpa knows how to tickle you ‘til you can’t breathe, and he also knows just when to stop tickling so you don’t pass out.
Today was a particularly interesting day and therefore worth noting. Kim and I had appointments at a day spa for some much anticipated pampering. We left early with the aim of finding some breakfast before the spa, but we were having a hell of a time finding anything on the beach. At long last, we pulled in to a ‘Miss Carrie’s’, a small local establishment more resembling a home with a restaurant in the basement. I asked a woman getting into her car how the breakfast was there. “Absolutely wonderful,” she replied, adding, “But you’d expect no other answer from Miss Carrie!” Omigod! It was Miss Carrie herself! She wasn’t lying; it was a rockin’ breakfast. The crab and cheese omelet is recommended…
Ah, the Athena Day Spa. I had some excellent and wanton moments there, but the excellent ones were memorable enough to nearly expunge the rest from my memory. But for the record, I don’t go to a spa to have my so-called ‘flaws’ pointed out to me with the promise of improving them. I come to relax and to feel wonderful just the way I am. I suppose many women aren’t happy with themselves and are looking for answers at a spa. That would not be me. The message I expect to get is ‘You are gorgeous and we want to make you feel wonderful today!’ Kim and I had a myriad of treatments done, including massages and facials. Of all my treatments, I was most impressed with and impacted by my massage, and strangely enough, my massage therapist. Jerry is a 23 year old massage therapist with a penchant for travel and a way of thinking that I rarely encounter (this is a good thing). While most massages are conducted in near silence, Jerry and I talked across the conversational spectrum for the entire duration of the 75 minute session! It was a strange and fun experience. I love meeting all kinds of people in all kinds of places and situations, but that was a first for me! I hope to chat with Jerry again, perhaps with my clothes on next time…
1 APRIL – LITTLE ROCK, ARKANSAS
What a time we’ve had! It’s Easter Sunday and I am at long last in Little Rock, Arkansas. Kim and I left Brown’s last night at around 7.00pm and proceeded to drive for five hours! We stopped for the night at a Ramada in Ghettoland, Mississippi and hauled ass on a sticks highway to get here before sundown. I was in utter shock at the massive amount of sheer poverty we witness as we drove by shack after dilapidated shack, a dealership worth of old cars laid out next to crumbling barns and rotting fences. I knew the South was by and large poor, but I had no idea.
Oh, Skin Update as it has played quite a role in the events of the last 24 hours. The weekend we left ‘Bama, I went to the beach with Uncle Bob for about 3 hours for some talk time and fresh air. It was mostly cloudy when we arrived, so I didn’t put my sunscreen on right away; Big Ass Mistake #1. I put some on later, and as the clouds dispersed at the insistence of the bright sun, it seemed that it was time to cover up as a precaution. When we got home, however, it was quickly discovered that it was all too little too late and considerable damage had been done. I officially had my first sunburn in over four years. When and where did the last one take place? The same damn beach in 1998. Anyway, over the next four days, I slept on my back (an incredibly torturous position for me as I like to toss and turn a bit – call me an ‘active sleeper’), avoided being out in the sun, and slathered nearly an entire bottle of aloe vera gel on my tender body in an effort to heal. The pain and redness for the most part persisted though, and it all came to a head yesterday as we were setting up the truck for an event. I donned a long-sleeved shirt in an effort to protect my shoulders and chest, which is where all the damage was done; the rest of me is fine and dandy. When I took my shirt off at the end of the day, everyone had quite a shock. Let me rephrase that. When I layered off to my tank top at the end of the day to give my skin some fresh air, everyone had quite a shock. Perverts. My shoulders were covered in a mass of tiny blisters! I finally got my boss to stop staring at my chest long enough to give me permission to go to a local hospital, and the lovely and talented Kim loaded me in the van and we were off. May I say that I was ‘next in line’ at Baptist Hospital; speedy work, ladies! It seems that the heat generated under that long-sleeved shirt during set up softened the skin and caused the blisters to come up so quickly. They were much better by the time I got to the hospital, but I wanted to make sure there wasn’t anything else I could do. Dr. Farmer gave me a prescription for steroids and Vicadin. One accelerates the skin’s healing process; the other makes it so I don’t care what the first one does. Three cheers for Vicadin! It should be said, though, that while taking Vicadin, you should not drink, drive, operate heavy machinery, or shop online. I went on a mini shopping spree and enjoyed every minute of it. I then rang my sister and informed her that a bunch of packages would be arriving at her house. Call me charming or don’t call me at all… I have to give a huge thank you to Kimmy Pooh for taking such good care of me, and to my boys for being so supportive and working their tails off in my absence. You are the most amazing crew, I could not ask for a better group of people to live and work with!
17 APRIL – SOMEWHERE IN WEST TEXAS
I love technology. I am sitting in the passenger seat of the Windstar typing away on my laptop as we hurl ourselves down Interstate 10 towards El Paso. Texas is, without a doubt, the toughest state to drive through. We spent most of yesterday in Texas, and we drove from 11.00am until midnight. Sarah McLachlan may be fumbling towards ecstasy, but we have been fumbling towards nothingness for hours. West Texas is like the outback; it sprawls in every conceivable direction into the vague lines of the horizon. I miss that. I miss the West. One of my favorite aspects of the Lowe’s tour was just being out west; being surrounded by a new, rugged, extreme landscape. I’m happy to be back…
So I’m seriously digging my laptop now. This sitting in the car and typing out my thoughts thing is pretty sweet. This is a great moment; Kim is driving and dancing in her chair to the pulsating beats of a remix of U2’s ‘Elevation’, I find myself lured in by the infectious beats as well. U2 has been a staple in the van since day one. Great music can not be resisted, and U2 is simply irresistible. I have to thank Virgin Megastore in Orlando for the plethora of import singles I picked up last week, including such amazing artists as U2 and George Michael. Two groups that know how to put together a maxi single…
This puts me to mind, I’ve been thinking about various things that one learns to appreciate as a traveler. When you’re out in the world for months at a time, away from permanence and routine, you come to truly value certain aspects of living. Great music for one; there is nothing greater than a great mix CD when you’re in a car for 10 to 14 hours a day. It truly is the line between heaven and hell on the road. Another is restrooms. When your ass spends 80% of its exposed time on public toilets in gas stations off interstates, you learn to love the peace, solitude, and cleanliness of the home grown variety. Of course, between time with John and the rest of the public, I probably have an ass kicking immune system, not to mention as ass kicking, well, ass.
Dance Break – There is a remix of Elevation by Paul Van Dyk that knocks my socks off and the big hit just came on. You know, that moment two thirds of the way into the song when they slow it down for a bit, then it slowly crescendos, fades, and then suddenly comes back at you full force until the end. You’re in a club and when that big beat bangs the door down, you dance full on until the very end and the high takes over.
Aaawwww yyyeahhhh, disc 2 is on! It’s Club Alltel in the van today; we always start the day high octane and get cruisy when the sun goes down. Disc 2 is Adrenaline’s ‘Shut the F#$k Up and Dance’. Techno and profanity – you can’t really go wrong, can you? Don’t worry mom, I don’t sing the words…and if I did it wouldn’t mean much as there are only two sentences in the entire song. Techno rocks…
It amazes me how much I can say and yet say absolutely nothing. We are on our third straight day of driving and I must be delirious. Florida was a five hour trip all on its own; I rang my grandparents as we passed their exit in Alabama, and I even tried to call Jerry from Athena Day Spa. Pat and Les were home, but I missed Jerry. Better luck next time I guess. ‘Bama was cruisin’, followed quickly by a fairly short jaunt in Mississippi. That’s a fun word to type and spell! Louisiana was a longer trip, but we broke it up by staying in Covington at the same hotel we stayed in last week on the way to Florida. Then there’s Texas. Everything is bigger in Texas, including the hair. In spite of my facetious nature, I do love it here right now. I love traveling by road, seeing everything in ‘slow motion’, or slower than most anyway. When you fly it’s beautiful, but it’s all topography; no sun burnt faces smiling at you, old rickety cars careening down the road defying the laws of physics and mechanics, thousands of road signs for everything from reminders of where you’re heading to wax museums full of replications with more substance than their inspirations, rows of old wise trees lining the highway in a parade of age and beauty. Age and beauty, those two words aren’t seen together much in this country, are they? It’s about time then. A dusty pebble for every life that traverses this road, a sun drenched plant for every thought that passes through the mind of a traveler here, a desert garden of life and experience.
The truckers sure are friendly today. We are ‘the oasis in the blue van’! How sweet! You know, most of the guys out here are pretty cool. Few are ever rude, most are hard working gentlemen confined to a traveler’s solitude. A pretty face and a sweet voice is all they ask. There aren’t many trucks out here, but then again there hasn’t been much of anything out here since seven o’clock yesterday night. I had a traveler’s moment last night. I popped in a couple of my cruisin’ CDs and sailed along for almost four hours as Kim had a much deserved sleep. Many would define my CDs as ‘love songs’, but since I haven’t known romantic love in quite a while, I don’t identify with that term at the moment and therefore call them ‘cruisers’. Jeff Buckley, Louis Armstrong, Dido, Neil Finn, U2, Tracy Chapman, Eta James, it’s all good. They’re so relaxing; I think Kim would drive us into a ditch if she were to have them on while behind the wheel at night. Ah, CD 3, ‘Outside’ by George Michael. This one is for you, Nic! ‘And yes, I’ve been bad…’
13 MAY
Happy Birthday Melissa... Love, Mom
14 MAY – CHARLOTTE, NC
Thank you, mom! Thank you for making me.
This is the life for me; sitting on the patio of a brasserie listening to live music with a glass of wine and my thoughts to keep me company. Jason and I arrived in Charlotte this afternoon from El Paso – Kim was home as her uncle passed away this weekend. We hauled some serious ass and had heaps of fun in the process; my 26th birthday was celebrated in a Ford Windstar traversing three states, and it was surprisingly good; one of my most memorable actually. Jason said ‘happy birthday’ to me at least twenty times and I received about eight phone calls in the course of the day – singers and well wishers flattering me with their sweet words. I later told a friend that I never realized there were so many people who were glad that I was born! How flattering and humbling. My two best friends also turned 26 this year; we have heard that one’s late twenties are among the best years of your life, and we are inclined to agree. Call it shameless optimism, call it what you will; we’ll take it! Jason took me to dinner and was so good to me all day – I could not have asked for a better day or better company! It was fun to see green again in the land, a welcome departure from the dusty naked landscape of El Paso. One of my favorite aspects of travel is watching the landscape change however subtle or drastic before my eyes. In a matter of minutes, hours, or days, the entire world morphs and I feel like a stranger being introduced to my first love over and over again. That and the varying states of clean in the nation’s gas station restrooms…
I arrived at the Marriott City Center, our corporate sponsored swanky digs for the next five nights, and was amazed at the level of service given to me upon arrival. I’m not used to people helping me with my bags, and considering their bulk as of late, perhaps I shouldn’t start. The staff brought out my birthday package from mom and dad and wanted me to open it right there with them, which I did. I was swirling in a mix of sentiments – I had more cards to open, in addition to gifts from mom and dad. They gave me a gift card to Best Buy (always a sure fire hit with me) and a homemade CD. Mom put together a mix of songs that blew me away and touched me deeply; songs I grew up with and some newbies that she loves. It was perfect beyond imagination!
The last few weeks have been busy and interesting. It seems that when I do have any time off I am too tired to be inspired to write. After the awning was destroyed by the Wicked Witch of the West, we shipped out to Conway, Arkansas, where the apartment we stayed in was spectacular while the internet connection was nonexistent. Go figure. The event we worked there, called ‘Toad Suck Daze’, turns out to be a huge, sprawling, free festival attended by hundreds of thousands of people which must mean that the entire state was there over the course of three days. After Conway we traveled to El Paso, dustbowl of West Texas, where I was treated with disdain by every person of Mexican descent and accumulated more dust and grime on my skin that was previously fathomed. We worked the ‘Airsho’ (If they paid by the letter they should have splurged for that last consonant; if anyone has it in their budget, it’s the military) at Ft. Bliss military base; plenty of soldiers to keep the eyes from starving. Had to take the awning down Sunday arvo due to strong winds – no Neb repeats wanted! I can safely say with little or no reservation that I will never live in El Paso. With any luck I will never have to even drive through the place again. I must say that a marked perk to this job is that I can make a somewhat educated decision as to where I wish to hang my hat upon retirement from the nomadic lifestyle. Or will I ever retire? From the occupation, most definitely, but from the lifestyle and mentality itself? I don’t see it. I’m too addicted, too intertwined with the passion of exploration, the lure of the unfamiliar, the tease and tickle of new experiences. My name is Melissa Brown and I am a traveler…
A chill is settling over Charlotte, cool enough to cause Jeff Brown, musician extraordinaire, to cut his set short. The chill is settling in my bones now, as the wind flirts with my hair and whispers in my ear. Time to rest…
20 MAY – CHARLOTTE, NC
I have left the plush confines of the Marriott for less flashy but more frugal and familiar surroundings at the Studio Plus north of the city. I’m really going to miss room service. This hotel is closer to Lowe’s Motor Speedway and will, with any luck, will translate to a shorter commute to work this week. My room is small and nice; I have an oven at this hotel, so you can call me Betty Crocker this week. You have no idea what liberation exists in the purchase of a frozen pizza. Oven baked pizza, baked spaghetti squash, and corn bread; personal favorites and all on Betty’s menu this week! I’m looking around my room and I now realize why the guys are amazed or at least entertained by me; I truly move in to my room each and every week. Photos are strewn about on clips hanging from mirrors, magnets clinging to the fridge inspire and entertain, candles disperse warmth and fragrance into every corner and crevasse, piles of books weigh the nightstand down, a vase of flowers reminds me of the world outside this oasis I have created.
5 JULY – YOUNGSTOWN, OHIO
Just arrived in the Microtel in Youngstown, OH; a couple just ascended the stairs and moved in to the room next to mine. ‘They’d better not have sex tonight!’ I mouthed to Kim down the hall. We are having electrical problems with the truck, so we will be more video arcade than promotional vehicle this weekend, but a commitment is a commitment, and since this is the only kind of commitment I seem capable of making at present, I should make the best of it.
Time has been slow and I have been tired on numerous levels. I have been ground coarse under the stones of this tour, weights that I have to throw off in order to get back to the best version of me, the one that has retreated from this present state of reality. Any encouraging words or thoughts are appreciated…
16 JULY – CLEVELAND, OHIO
Hey kids! We have been in The Mistake by the Lake for over a week now, renting a ninth floor apartment in the fashionable Wherehouse District near The Flats. Nice restaurants and cool clubs abound, like the Funky Buddha for instance. The Funky Buddha is a great club next door to our apartment; we found it after cavorting all over The Flats in an attempt to entertain ourselves. It’s always the last place you look (because once you’ve found it you stop looking, right?)…
It’s been a real experience sharing a two bedroom flat with four other people. Kim and I had it to ourselves for the first four days, then the three guys moved themselves in and let’s just say it’s never been quite the same. The washer and dryer have been running non-stop since Thursday, dishes get piled to the heavens like a Shel Silverstein poem I used to know, we get phone calls at three in the morning when one of them returns from an outing and expects to be let in on command, and there is no privacy in even the most remote crevasse of the flat. I have, however, taken numerous lessons from the experience, namely that I will one or no roommates when I domesticate.
I’ve had a considerable amount of free time here in Cleveland, and have enjoyed exploring the city on foot. Kim and I spent the better part of a day at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, six floors of musical exploration and saturation. There is a three floor special exhibition about John Lennon which was an amazing and enlightening experience for me. I’d never known much about John Lennon’s life beyond his participation in The Beatles, and this exhibition opened my eyes to his life, his passions, and his actions from a larger and more personal perspective. I was particularly affected by the ‘personal effects’ bag that Yoko Ono was given at the hospital the day that John was shot and killed. His clothing and personal effects were deposited in this bag and given to her upon his death, and she has never removed its contents. She added this bag to the exhibit as a stark visual reminder of the tragedy of gun violence in this country; an unforgettable testimony and challenge to us all. The top floor was a small room comprised of hand-written song lyrics to some of Lennon’s most influential and memorable songs. Certain songs were highlighted on displayed boards which doubled as speakers that played the featured songs in rotation. It was an inspiring, relaxing, and somewhat surreal place in which to be; surrounded in sight and sound by the memory and legacy of a man whose physical presence has long departed but whose essence will never leave us.
I also made a point of visiting the Cleveland Library where I can read all the intellectual or trashy magazines I want for free. This is one of my favorite activities, one that has been neglected as of late. I love reading, and where else but the public library can you be exposed to so many ideas, experiences, tragedies, comedies, struggles, victories, stories? Alright, maybe Barnes & Noble, and while they serve espresso, everything costs you. Despite my nomadic lifestyle, I am still in the process of creating my personal home library. My latest addition and current reading selection is ‘A People’s History of the United States, 1492 – Present’ by Howard Zinn. I have always been fascinated by and curious about history, and this book not only educates but challenges our traditional notions of American history by telling the stories of our past through the eyes of those rarely heard; women, slaves, Native Americans, immigrants, and the working poor. It has pushed me to look at our country and its origins in a new, less ‘blind patriot’ light, which I think is imperative to knowing ourselves for who we really are and acknowledging the links between the current state and mentality of our society and the choices and actions made by those before us. Some of you can expect this in your Christmas package...
22 JULY – ST. CLAIRSVILLE, OHIO
We have just finished the Jamboree in the Hills, a four-day country music festival in the far southeast corner of Ohio, just five miles from the West Virginia border. I have seen more bare-chested men, filled out bikinis, lazy eyes, Confederate flags, coolers full of beer (one sweetly called the ‘Jamboree Beer Buggy’), and pick-up trucks in four days than I’ve seen in my entire life. The music was actually quite good, and I even stayed one night to see Lonestar, one of my mom’s favorites. Ironically, I rang her so I could hold the phone up for her to hear and they played ‘I’m Already There’. It’s a sign.
Kim and I were talking and we think that ‘Freedom’ is an ironic name for the truck in our opinion. Since Subjugation and Oppression cower in the cold shadow of Freedom, we felt these would be appropriate names for the chase vehicles. We will be adding graphics soon. Perhaps this is my Howard Zinn-tainted mind speaking, though I don’t feel that that translates to inaccuracy. I have been swallowed up by this history book as of late, glued to each page as I am introduced to the other side of the historical coin at every turn in America’s past. If I teach history, I will buy copies of this book out of my own pocket and give one to every student at the end of the year. Oh wait, that would require me to suck it up, quit my job, and go back to school and become a teacher. Closer than many may think…
29 JULY – WHEELING, WEST VIRGINIA
I couldn’t leave this place without writing about it; consider it a moral imperative. I have traveled to 45 of the 48 continental states and have never, I repeat, NEVER encountered a bona fide freak fest like the one I just attended here. I’m not trying to express some narrow-minded opinion of this town or its inhabitants; this is an account that can be supported by my fellow co-workers across the board and is an honest account of my experiences and observations there over a week spent in its now dilapidated downtown. Wheeling, once home to steel and coal dynasties and, I am told, more millionaires per capita than any town in the United States, is now a mere whisper of its former self; classic architecture marred by boarded up windows and the stale smell of abandonment, streets sparse and neglected by the stampede of pedestrians that once congested these paths just a decade ago. But enough poetry; the true art lies in the eclectic residents of Wheeling and the surrounding Ohio Valley. Due to the gaping economic divide that exists here (you’re either destitute poor or rolling-in-it wealthy), there is no shortage of colorful characters to behold. This may have something to do with the disproportionate number of mentally and physically disabled that we saw here. This is not meant as some sort of testimony to the West Virginia stereotype, but rather an honest account of the demographic at the Italian Festival. Yeah, we worked the 20th Annual Italian Festival in downtown Wheeling (renamed the WWF – Wheeling Wop Fest – by a fatigued crew at midnight during the writing of the event recap). There are a ton of Italians there, but we’re told that the influence here lies in the Greek families (and by family I mean ‘family’; you Godfather fans will know what I mean). So be it, the food was good, but I won’t be looking at another pizza for quite a while. Anyway, we were talking about the locals, the true festival entertainment. Since we were stuck there all day, we had plenty of time and opportunity to observe the locals and entertain ourselves to no end. There were tons of tattoos of naked women, dragons, daggers through hearts, and hogs (not the farm animal), litters of unattended children, entire families looking to score free loot (we had groups sign up for free t-shirts three or four times, apparently under the impression that they were ordinary enough to be forgettable to us. They had no idea how unforgettable they actually were…), and an amazing collection of t-shirts. Remember all the t-shirts you’ve seen in the novelty shops; the ones you laugh at but would never dream of actually purchasing for yourself? They were all here: ‘Sexy Senior Citizen’, ‘Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful – hate me because I’m a BITCH’, and the ever popular ‘If you don’t like my attitude dial 1-800-EAT SHIT’. You’ve got to love the American clothing industry’s ingenuity and complete lack of decorum. I always knew that these shirts wouldn’t be made if there wasn’t a market for them, but I always wondered where that mythical market was until now. This was the white trash capital, which makes sense as we were only five miles from the site of Jamboree in the Hills, the four day country music festival we worked last week. The local radio station (WOMP fm, draw your own conclusion) was running a ‘Mullet Count’ over the weekend; what does that say? I must mention though that the DJs were the first on record to call Kim and I ‘the hot ALLTEL girls’ while broadcasting; extra points to them for flattering us on the air…
So as most of you know, I have tendered my resignation and will be leaving the ALLTEL tour on 19 August. I’m burned out after three years of long tours and need a change for a while, a chance to refresh and rejuvenate. I will be going to grad school for a Masters in education; take a moment to imagine me as a teacher. Please file encouragement or enthusiastic objections with my guestbook. I am a bit scared at the prospect of leaving a life I’ve known and loved for three years to take an entirely different path, but there is also an undeniable sense of excitement at the risks being taken and the opportunities that lie in closing one door and opening so many others. I’ve always loved school and learning, and relished my time teaching the littlies on the Lowe’s tour, so teaching seems like a good fit for me. I’ve also gotten an amazing level of support from my family and friends regarding my decision; thanks to all of you who have recently shared your kind words of support and enthusiasm! It is much appreciated and a great source of strength in those moments when I question myself. I’ve learned so much in the last few years on the road; lessons about who I want to be, how I want to act, how I should treat people and how I should treat myself…great lessons that have come out of some trying times. The most valuable lessons always do though. I have finally learned at the ripe old age of 26 how to walk away from something. This is the first job I have ever left before completion; a very difficult task for me as I’ve always finished what I’ve started. I’ve learned, however, that happiness comes before your track record, and it’s time for me to move on. Leaving my work mates is a struggle though; it’s hard for me to leave them in the face of all the good times and hard work we’ve shared in the last six months. When you work, live, travel, and socialize with the same four people every day, your relationships develop at such a drastically accelerated rate, that we’ve all practically married and divorced each other several times over by now. We become close in a way that can’t be conveyed in words to anyone who hasn’t experienced this life themselves. Suffice it to say then that they will be missed but far from forgotten or devoid from my life. That’s what road trips are for after all…