Author: RavenWolf

Pairing: Lestat/Louis

Rating: NC-17

Summary: Lestat searches for a way to bind Louis to him. Meanwhile, Louis is left alone without Armand, and things happen.

Prologue:

Claudia was my first, and if I do say so, cataclysmically unsuccessful, attempt to bind my Louis to me. Since then, I’ve attempted innumerous ways to show my fledgling just how much I need him by my side. We’ve grown apart since then, but I still hunger for him with a burning cold passion that eats at my bones mercilessly.

There must be a way to join us, and I have always thought so. But up until recently, I’d been too mired in my own existential bullshit to even think twice on it. It has all come full circle; the answer to my questions is Louis, in some sense.

In my Louis, I can find a place to rest my weary heart. A love between vampires, that is not uncommon. But the love that I have for Louis is different than anything I have ever encountered before, in the mortal or immortal world. It seems that when I am near him, I can truly feel what it was like to be a mortal in love. Slow fires burn in my heart when I think of him; it seems impossible that my love cannot transcend the petty barriers set by nature and God.

So I am on a search. As I have been for most of my life, I suppose. But this time I know what I am looking for. A link. Something that will remove those final barriers between my Louis and myself, and let us explore our love to the fullest. I don’t know where I will find it; I am starting in the farthest reaches of the East. It may take a hundred years, but I will comb the globe if I must. I will search forever, if only for the sake of my Louis...

***

Louis had spent the night on the town, for once. Armand doubted he’d been anywhere more exciting than the local bookstore, though. It had taken a lot of urging on his part to get Louis out of the flat, but he was sorry that he had, now. He missed his favorite lover.

Armand sat, composed, on a park bench watching the streetlights glitter off the water in the water fountain. He tried not to worry, despite himself. Louis, though a weak one, was a vampire nonetheless, and could take care of himself. And if he was in trouble, Armand would be able to hear his cries for help across any distance.

That was the advantage of Louis being Lestat’s fledgling. Armand and Louis could hear each other’s thoughts, in a way more intimate than any maker and fledgling. Still, part of Armand wished he’d been the one to find such a beautiful creature and initiate him into the night. Despite the silence between them, there was still such a special bond between a fledgling and his Maker. Armand envied that of Lestat.

He pushed his jealous thoughts away. They did him no good. Lestat was not here; nor would he ever be. He’d given up on Louis, gone off to find adventure. Armand had wished him well and prayed in his most secret thoughts that like his mother and fledgling, Gabrielle, Lestat would disappear into the wilderness of the world, to return perhaps a century or two hence.

Louis, of course, had felt differently. For the first few months after Lestat’s departure, he would not leave the house. He didn’t look up from his book when he was awake, and some nights he didn’t even leave his coffin. It worried Armand far more that Louis seemed to read the same book over and over again.

Just as Armand was about to give up his pleading and let Louis alone, the younger vampire arose and demanded that they go hunting together. Armand was delighted; it seemed he would finally have a companion after his heart’s own fashion.

But that was the only time they’d ever gone hunting together. Louis had shown a remarkable penchant for privacy; it disappointed Armand somewhat, but he was willing to make do. After all, Louis loved him, and that was what mattered.

Except that Louis seemed so reclusive most of the time. Armand wouldn’t know what to do if he hadn’t been able to read Louis’s thoughts. As it was, Louis rarely let him kiss him. Rarely let him touch him.

Armand sighed. Best not to pick away at these things; they had a tendency to come unraveled.

Just then, Louis sat down next to him on the bench. “What were thinking, chere?”

Armand looked over and smiled. “Nothing important. Just about us.” He moved his hand to cover Louis’s.

“Are you calling us unimportant?” Louis jested lightly. He let Armand’s hand rest on his for a moment, then moved it away. Armand restrained a sigh.

“Of course not, love. Just wondering what you were up to and when you would be back.”

“Well, you have your answer to both questions. Have you fed? The night is growing old, and you know how cranky you get when you don’t eat.” Louis smiled and Armand melted. This almost made up for pulling away from him. Louis did care; he was just more restrained with his physical affection. That was okay. Armand could compromise. After all, if it got him what he wanted...

They sat in silence on the park bench for a time, staring at the glittering lights of the city through the green foliage of nature. The fountain dripped water pleasantly, the trickling, liquid sound echoing dimly in the night. Both vampires stared at it, for want of something else to focus on.

Then, a little girl walked by. Her hair was corn silk yellow and tied with a blue ribbon. As she passed the two vampires, she clutched more tightly at her mother’s hand. The mother gave the two predators a fearful and angry look before dragging her daughter past at a greater speed.

Louis sighed. Armand didn’t have to be able to read his mind to know what he was thinking about. “You still miss her, don’t you?”

Louis looked at Armand with spring green eyes. “I never stopped,” he said with surprise. “My whole life, the only thing I’ve ever really wanted was a child. Claudia was the closest I ever got, and look how badly that turned out. I guess I’m just not meant to be a father.”

Louis looked away and blinked back blood tears.

Armand touched his shoulder gingerly. He was totally at a loss when it came to Claudia; when Louis got like this, usually it had been Lestat who would comfort him. Armand fought down the shiver of jealousy and took his hand back. Louis wasn’t paying much attention to him anyways. Armand felt worse than useless.

Finally, Armand stood. “It’s getting late, love. We should return home if we don’t want to burn to ash this morning.” He extended a hand.

Louis took it. But his face was pale and blank, and Armand began to worry that he would lose him again, to the memory of Claudia this time, instead of Lestat.

They walked home in silence, and went to their separate coffins, Armand briefly wishing that Louis would come with him so that they could sleep together. But of course, that didn’t happen, so Armand was left to dream alone in silence.

Continue