Grandpa and Billy
"Once I went on a very strange journey," I told little Billy. "I was walking down the street and I saw a magazine. A magazine was something you read… unlike those new fangled things you put over your face and it tells stories using pictures… Kinda like those TV things we had back in the 21st century, but I'm getting off track. Anyway, I saw a magazine, and so I went over to pick it up. Then, a strange force sucked me into the magazine. A few seconds later, before I could figure out what happened, another person flew in and smashed into me. After I figured out what had happened, I realized the very confused person next to me was my friend, Elliott. The force sucking us in was a goat with a really big mouth, and he was really puffy from having so much air in him. Elliott was just as confused as I was so we decided to go exploring together, since we had been friends for years, and went to school together, and…"
"Grandpa!" said Billy, "What about the story?"
"I was getting back to that," I said. "Anyway, we went searching, but first, we popped that stupid goat with a pin I had in my pocket. We also took a look around to see how we could get out later. We didn't see anything, so we left the room.
"The next room had gold and jewels… but not like any we had ever seen. There were cups, in spiral shapes and balls made of solid diamond. There were rings of half silver, half-gold and jewels all over them… and in the corner was a HUGE ruby. Me and Elliott decided to take some stuff, so we packed out pockets full, and went to the ruby. As soon as we touched it, a hole in the wall opened and a big monster stepped out along with a couple other small ones. They tried to kill us with fireballs, but they missed. The big one hit one of the little ones, and all 3 small monsters turned on the big one. The big monster killed 2 of the 3 others, but the remaining small one killed him. Then he came after us. Me and Elliott emptied out pockets and threw everything we had at the monster. A coin flew in his mouth. Then he turned some color that looked like puke and died. I guess he choked to death.
"As soon as he was dead, the room disappeared and we were floating around in space, although there was air and we could talk and stuff. Then we ran into a spaceship and went through the wall because we hit it so hard. Inside was the room with the treasure again. We decided we had done enough exploring, so we went to the first room we were in, and right in front of us was a huge sign that had flashing neon lights and said EXIT with an arrow pointing to the right. The funny thing was we hadn't noticed it before. We should have known better. It wasn't the same place. When we went to the exit, we began falling farther and farther. We figured we were about to become dead, and we used out lungs to scream like mad. You'd be surprised how we take out lungs for granted. Then, darkness was all we saw… except for a blue spiral of light. We could feel the ground beneath us so we walked to it. Elliott decided it was ok to touch and stuck his arm right through it. When he pulled it back, it was gone. He screamed and fell over into it. When I tried to pull him back, all that was left was his bottom half, so I threw the rest of him in. Then I tripped and fell in myself. The next thing I saw was Elliott, and lots of people staring at us. Then, a white truck pulled up, and the men inside took us away for acting crazy and screaming for no reason. That's why you visit me here, in this nice padded room, Billy."
"Oh," said Billy, "okay. When I grow up, I wanna be just like you grandpa!"
"No you don’t Billy. No you don't"
(yay)