Erik and I went straight from the honeymoon to the opera…we didn’t want Marie to suspect anything…that and we wanted a few more days of just the two of us. (You’d think after 10 days of nothing but each other we would’ve wanted a break…but you’d be thinking of some one else.)
A week in Paris (1 minute in home time) and we were back, costumes and plan at the ready.
We came home to find Marie…lounging. (What else do you call watching movies in your sweats on a Saturday afternoon?) “So Marie…” I plopped myself down next to her on the couch. “You miss us?”
She gave one of those looks, the “I don’t know her” look. “Yes.” She drawled slowly.
“Oh, good.” I grinned at her. “We missed you too, right hon?”
“Of course.” Erik replied, setting himself more gracefully on the couch so that we flanked Marie.
Marie looked back and forth between us, surely taking in my 'I know something you don’t know' grin and the mischievous light in Erik’s eyes. “Oh no.”
I put on my best innocent look, not real good when I’m not innocent. “What?”
She sighed. “What do you two have up your sleeves?”
I made a show of looking up the sleeves for something. “Nope, nothing but the properly adjacent parts, how about you Erik?”
“I think I can safely ascertain without looking that I have nothing up my sleeves.”
“And nothin’ in you heads either.” She commented in her best Philly ghetto accent. “What do you two have planned?”
“Oh, just a little vacation…you know, you, me, Erik… Three Musketeers syndrome?”
She gave me a quizzical look. “Three Musketeers syndrome?”
I nodded. “All for one and one for all.” I explained.
She nodded understanding but still looked wary. “To where Lisa?”
“Erik, I think she suspects some ulterior motive.” I feigned hurt to Erik.
“Well, she would be right then wouldn’t she?”
I snorted in his general direction. “Gee hon, that was helpful!”
“All right you guys, what’s up.” She cast as stern glance at me. “And if you say the ceiling and the light fixtures I’ll smack you.”
I sighed. “You’re no fun Marie.”
“Just tell her Lisa.” Erik admonished.
“Jeez, ok…we want you to help us rescue another wayward soul from the past…was that direct enough dear?” I batted me eyelashes at Erik.
“What wayward soul?”
“Claude.”
“Claude…” She prompted, not sure who I meant.
“Think real hard hon, you have a fic dedicated to him…you know, tall guy, bad hat?” I prompted in return.
Realization dawned slowly. “Claude…Frollo?”
I clapped her on the shoulder. “Astute dear, slow but astute.”
“Why on earth would you want to go there?”
“Well, first off, when we first started this time travel thing it was between Erik and Claude. I did a bit of research on our old pal and he would be easy to remove from the time stream too…if we can save him from the assassin first.”
“Assassin, what?” She asked, showing some interest despite herself.
"The one who kills him... you know, that's what assassins do. That is, if we don't get to Claude first." I explained as though it was all painfully obvious. "What are you talking about?"
"Ok...once more...real slow, so pay attention. (insert Marie's dirty look) Claude Frollo will be killed by an assassin a few days before his 44th birthday unless we go back and play in the time stream."
"Lisa, dear, darling, think about any movie version of this-"
"All based on Hugo who was just using a well known name to get publicity for his novel." I interjected.
"Whatever! He was the Minister of Justice and a priest! Does this not scream uptight asshole to anyone else?!" She demanded in typical melodramatic fashion.
This time Erik came in for the save. "Actually he left the preisthood and was known for benevolent treatment of the poor."
She didn't look terribly impressed.
"C'mon, if nothing else we get to save a decent guy from an assassin... you really want to stay home while Erik and I take Elsie for a spin?" I coaxed
“Do I have a choice?” She sighed.
“Nope.” I grinned happily. “And I think you and Claude would make a cute couple.”
“What?!”
“That was less that tactful Lisa.” Erik commented dryly. I stuck out my tongue out at him.
“What?” I whined.
“No, no, no, no, no…we are not going time traveling to hook me up with Claude Frollo, he can stay assassinated.”
“Sweet Marie, glad you didn’t feel that way about Erik. At least help us save the guy…you could get some good research in for your fic if nothing else.”
“Oh, just what I need, a priest reading my fic about him.” She rolled her eyes.
“I didn’t say have him edit for you…that’s my job, I was thinking more about authentic background info.”
“We’re not going and that’s it.” She crossed her arms over her chest.
“Get in the car.”
“No.”
“Get in the car Marie, we already got the costumes.”
“No.”
“C’mon, you‘ll get to see me in a period dress and Erik in hose.” Erik glared at me and I shrugged.
“No.”
“Get in the car.”
Marie sent a beseeching look in Erik’s direction. “Help me out here Erik.” She pleaded.
He nodded and rose for the couch. “Of course.” He agreed and proceeded to pick her up. “Would you open the door Lisa?”
“Ahhhhh!” She screamed in disbelief, unsuccessfully trying to struggle out of Erik’s grip.
“Better save your strength hon.” I patted her shoulder consolingly as I opened the door. “You won’t get loose.”
Marie offered a growl in reply as we set her in the car.
“Ready to go babe?” I asked, turning to look at her.
She just glared at me. “We outta here!” I shouted as I punched the button.
All I heard from the back was a faint, “Rasafrackin roommates and their rasafrackin husbands…”
MORE TO COME WITH THE
CONTINUED ADVENTURES OF ELSIE!