| Q. How can i get the buffalo's out of my cupboard? - Yussepi, Norway. A. Cooking chocolate-soup would remove 2 or 3 buffalo's, but the rest would sadly have to be shot and thrown out, whilst trying on shoes. Q. My cat has trouble digesting telegraph poles. What should i do? - Mr stolle, Belgium. A. I suggest that you buy your cat a bicycle for christmas, and when he wears it out, give him in a bowl of 2 Minute Noodles. Q. My dog does not seem to be able to send emails. What should I do?? - Lucy Murr. A. Well, your dog would need to get a hair cos I love Shannon Brown and his blonde cute curls. Um, I think the computer sends emails... Q. I think my elephant is seeing someone else. What can I do about it? - Josephine, Melbourne. A. I stongly suggest that you bandage up your elephants eye's. Q. My alligator keeps drinking out of the carton. What can I do to prevent this? - Uder, Germany A. You can start by getting a haircut, and to prevent it completly i suggest that you throw a meat pie at your fridge. Q. How come nobody likes me?? - anon. A. Well Miss Murr, don't ask me! how would i know?? i like you!! Q. My feet are growing longer everyday. Where should I do my shopping? - A duck, A platypus farm in greece. A. I suggest you try 'Sans Souci fruit world', but if your looking for cheese, try 'Eskimo's discount shoes'. Q. My car is continually getting stolen by bandicoot's. How can i keep this from happening? - A lemon, The fruitmarket. A. Firstly, i suggest you hire some bandicoot's from 'Bandicoot's 'R' Us' and sell them to your next door neighbours. Who in turn will have them over for dinner, and maybe even a party, where they will play golf with a football & a fork. This may not fix your problem, but it may encourage hair re-growth and may even promote the fast growing sport of 'Football Golf'. Q. Why does a Monkey wear glasses?? - Michael Hayes, Sydney A. I'm sorry but i do not seem to know the answer to this one. Thanks to Michael Hayes andTim Neville for their contributions to this page. |
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