Everyone knows someone who has two surnames, or a hyphenated surname. John Brown-Smith, for example. On first inspection, there doesn’t seem to be anything too bad with this. I guess girls are sticking up for their rights these days and are not taking on the man’s name. Fair enough? Why should their family heritage be lost in their offspring’s name?

WRONG
Apart from giving your children ridiculously long names which they will have to waste literally weeks for their lives writing out on forms did you ever bother to think about future generations? Maybe the tradition of the woman taking the man’s last name was there for a reason?

Consider this: Your child marries the child of another hippy marriage. How many last names are you grandchildren going to have? Four, 2 from you and 2 from them. That’ll be nice for them. Your great-grandchildren: I’m guessing 8 surnames. Smith is a common name. You might get Mike Smith-Brown-Smith-Jones. Or should that be Smith-squared-Brown-Jones?

Conclusion:
People who give their children double surnames are stupid. They cannot even see a generation ahead. If you’re the victim of the bad parenting mentioned above and you think your parents aren’t stupid, then I’m sorry to break it to you, you parents did drugs. If you’ve ever found it sad they there are so many crack addicted babies born everyday and wondered how it feels to be one of them, stop wondering.

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