Our December issue is somewhat sparse in comparison to earlier issues in the past year. Messages and participation has been down primarily due to the November & December holidays activities, as well as, members who are busy putting their records together for their tax accountants. January is the month folks when Uncle Sam and others want money for their favorite charity "the government". It's also the month to come up with some interesting New Year Resolutions. Have you made any? I have! The first is to keep my message in-box a little cleaner so that I can keep better track of the happenings in both forums. Who knows … with some luck that will enable me to post this newsletter on time for a change and add some interesting articles in the upcoming year.
 
 

Our January Forum Member of the Month lives in Minnesota and has done extensive research in our Osage connection. Helen Hlavanka comes from our Lacoursiere line. She has written a book about her line and is in the process of helping Betty Revard of the Osage Nation in writing a book on Joseph Revard who married the Osage lady, Catherine. We'd love to hear more about how this came about, Helen, and more about you next month. Congratulations on being voted our January Forum Member of the Month.
 
 

Réal says he got started in genealogy in 1981 when his daughter, Lyne, was studying at Laval University in Québec. She would go to the Caseault pavilion to research her ancestors during her spare time. Everything was done by hand then. She would tell her father about her work and this peeked his interest in the new names and seeing the family tree grow. He was transferred to Montreal in 1985 and the genealogy work went into a box and remained there for ten years when Réal got his first computer. He bought a genealogy program and started to capture the accumulated data and continued researching with his daughter. Thus far, he has 25,000 names in his database. During this past year, he and Lyne have started to find out stories and facts about their ancestors, which they find much more interesting. Réal works on genealogy from October to April and it means a great deal to him. It is during this time that his wife says she is a "genealogy widow" as she does not share this passion with him and probably thinks that there is no fun researching dead people.

His response to what was the most interesting piece of documentation or story that he has found is as follows: "Over all these years, I haven't had time to dig into certain situations regarding a few ancestors of ours and last year we worked on one of them successfully. In fact, we are still working on it. When I was making my matriarchal's line, we were stopped with the wedding of François Buttiges and Marie-Anne Arseneault. We were unable to go any further with François' line. We knew his father was Jean Buttiges and his mother was Marguerite Rivard, but we couldn't localize them in Canada. This François Buttiges appeared sometimes under the name of François Béliesse and also as François Bélisle. In PRDH, we found that François was of German origin and came from the province of Brunswick. Lyne went on a Website that specialized in immigration and wrote the name François Buttiges. Thanks to the soundex system, the name of Franz Boddiges came out as a result. Lyne wrote to Ottawa (Archives) and got in touch with Mr. J. P. Wilhelmy who wrote a book on German Mercenaries. With the new documentation, we have learned that the real name was Franz Beddiger born in Hatten near Heerte in Braunschweig (Brunswick), Germany around 1759 or 1760." Last year Réal and Lyne wrote a paper on this ancestor which was published in the monthly publication Héritage of the Société of Généalogie de la Maurice et des Bois-Francs. After the piece was published, Réal bought Register of German Military Men by Johannes Helmut Merz from Hamilton, Ontario. He later got in touch with Mr. Merz, who gave him many clues that are helping him in his research. Réal was surprised to find out that Mr. Merz had a copy of his paper that was published, even though Mr. Merz doesn't know French.

Réal continues to tell us more about this ancestor of his. He learned from Mr. Merz that "there is a village of Beddingen just northeast of Salzgitter which now belongs to the city of Salzgitter. This city is approximately 15 km south of Braunschweig, Lower Saxony (Niedersachsen). Franz arrived in Canada in the Fall of 1778 and was assigned into the Lt. Colonel Ferdinand Albrecht Von Barner's Regiment. He was hired in the context of the Revolutionary War (British Crown - Canada- against Americans) which took place between 1775 and 1783. We learned from an archive's report that at 5 ft. 3/4 inch, he was the second shortest man of the Regiment. He was discharged from the army at the end war in 1783 and, like a little more than 2,000 other German Mercenaries, he remained in Canada. The number of men supplied to England during the American Revolution by the six German principalities reached almost 30,000 soldiers. During wintertime, war activities were almost nonexistent and therefore, the soldiers were assigned (winter quarters) to live with Canadian families in groups of three or five soldiers per family. Most of the time, Franz was assigned to live in Riviere-du-loup, which is now Louiseville, and that is the area he chose to live after his release from the army. After his wedding in May 1791, he lived successively in Riviere-du-Loup, Yamachiche, St. Ursule, Pointe-du-Lac and St. Leon-Le-Grand (Maskinongé), where he died in July 1809. At the time of his death, he was working as a teacher in St. Léon, which means he was probably speaking French in Germany because of his mother. One of these days, we hope to find someone (on a voluntary basis) in Germany who will find out if Franz Beddiger's mother, Marguerite Rivard, was related to our Rivard family. At the moment, I continue the researching by going through notaries' contracts (which means a few thousand acts) in order to find out what he did during his lifetime. So far, we know that he was a farmer at the beginning but we soon realized he loved making transactions by buying and selling farms, which explains why he was moving so often. In the near future, we might still discover other addresses and maybe some more children. We also noted that, there were German Mercenaries living in each of the above mentioned municipalities. We are wondering if this ancestor, Franz Beddiger, would be the one responsible for the blond hair of certain members of the family (my mother's line). I would also like to mention that on November 25, 1845, Joseph-François Rivard dit Dufresne (Louis and Marguerite-Appoline Thibault) married Marie Anne Louise Dupont (Louis and Marie-Anne Buttiges-Béliesse). This Marie-Anne Buttiges-Béliesse was the daughter of Franz Beddiger-Boddiges-Buttiges-Béliesse-Bédeliesse-Bélièche Bélisle and so on. So there is another Dufresne family who is sharing this German ancestor."

Réal and his daughter have not found any ghosts or pirates yet, but they did find something that was puzzling to them. Lyne was wondering why Jeanne Trotocheau, age 49, ( now Trodéchaud, which is the name of Réal's ex-wife) Louis Pothier, age 47, his wife, Marie-Anne Lefebvre-Bélisle, age 43, and their daughter, Barbe Pothier, age 8 were all buried together on the same day, October 22, 1779 in Trois-Rivières. They knew that Jeanne Trotocheau was living with her husband, Jean-François Chaillé in Pointe-du-Lac and the Pothier family were living in the Trois-Rivières suburbs (West side), near Pointe-du-Lac. Their farm was along the St. Lawrence River. There was no relationship between the two families. On the burial papers, they learned that the four of them were murdered on October 20, 1779 as well as a German soldier whose winter quarters were in Louis Pothier's family. They were killed with a piece of wood. Réal quotes a statement written by Lieutenant Friedrich Julius von Papet in his personal journal regarding this particular event. "October 21, 1779 A gruesome murder was committed at Pointe du Lac yesterday evening between eight and nine o'clock. Ensign Graefe, who has his quarters two houses distance from the scene, found his host, by the name of Portiers, his wife and daughter of ten years of age, a woman who worked on the river, and the Dragoon (Brunswick Dragoon Regt. Prinz Ludwig) Wolte at eleven o'clock in the evening. The brigadier ordered a thorough investigation and that a record be made of everything. We went there also, and I must confess, I have never seen a more gruesome sight. The militias in every parish on both sides of the river were asked to find the perpetrators. Notice of this terrible deed was sent to every settlement, as three men had been seen in a canoe near Becancour early this morning. One non-commissioned officer and seven of our men were immediately sent out with an officer of the militia and Chevalier de Tonnecour and some armed Canadians, and it is hoped they will not be able to escape. October 22, 1779 Two murderers were caught. The principal participant escaped into the woods. At eleven o'clock they were brought here. These two Englishmen from the 29^th Regiment had arrived from England as recruits this year and had deserted. They were questioned and stated that the escapee committed the murders and they had only been present at the time. The escapee is still free. The report concerning this band was sent to His Excellence. There has never been an example of such a murder here. The five victims were brought here today for burial. October 26, 1779 I received correspondence that His Excellence has written that no costs be spared in the effort to catch the third scoundrel. November 8, 1779 The murders were escorted to Montreal today." Réal found this information in the Lt. Von Papet Journal, which is reported in Heritage Book Archives- The Hessian Collection, volume 1 translated by Bruce E. Burgoyne. This investigation was not done by the German command, but by the Quebec Administration under the authority of Governor Haldimand. Réal's next step will be to borrow a part of the Haldiman Collection that is on microfilm in Trois Rivières to complete his research of this story. He hopes it will give another point of view and more information on this event.

Réal says that he does use the internet for information, but that the accuracy is not always there, so he confirms this information with other source. He says, "With time and experience we know that information has to be confirmed with other sources and this comes like a natural reflex. The choice of sources are also related with the problems that have to be solved."

When asked if anyone introduced him to the Rivard Forum he says, "I guess someone did introduce me to the Rivard Forum, but I can't remember who had this good idea."

I asked if there was any one person on the forum who helped him more than anyone else. His response to that was, "I was kind of low profile type, so there were not too many people who knew about me, except for Mrs. Rivard Mickey, Larry Lacoursière, and André Dufresne. Every one of them did help me."

Réal says that he has many surnames among the 25,000 names in his database and that all the names are important, but that he is not doing any special research on any specific surname. He claims he is running out of time, therefore, he prefers to work on history.

AUTOBIOGRAPHY

I was born in Trois-Rivières in May of 1938 as a premature baby and we soon moved outside the city on doctor’s recommendation and stayed there until may 1944. In June 1939, I had a new sister to share my childhood. We then lived in Ste-Marthe-du-Cap and our apartment was edging the St. Lawrence River. This place was situated between 1,000 to 1,500 feet away (West) of Nicolas Rivard’s farm in 1663. I remember that my father bought a rowboat and during the day, my mother would put some water into it so I could swim because I was afraid to swim in the River. When my father would come home, after dinner, we would go on the River in the evening to collect lost pieces of wood used by Paper Mills. When we had lots of them, it was then sold back to the St-Maurice Paper Mills situated West of our place and this brought some extra money. In wintertime, my father had a small fishing cabin installed on the ice and we were fishing «poulamon» (can tomcod), from the end of December until the middle of February. At that time, the St. Lawrence River was completely frozen during wintertime and there was no navigation. I also remember that it was World War II period and still have a few souvenirs of that time. Because of the war, we were restricted by a coupon system, which applied on sugar, meat and many other things that we couldn’t buy without those coupons. As a young child, I remember soldiers who were training on the second neighbour's land and sometimes they were going down to the beach and were firing mortar in the River. I was very impressed by those manoeuvres. In March of 1942, we celebrated the birth of a second sister and unfortunately, she died in November of the same year. We moved back to Trois-Rivières because my parents wanted to have the school nearby and we were living near the train station. We lived there only one year and there is one salient fact that I remember: A couple of times, there were German prisoners coming off the train who would walk to the Exposition ground (where the baseball stadium is) where they were kept in barracks. There have been no escapes from there, I guess they were well treated. At the end of March 1946, we celebrated the birth of a third sister and she was the last one of the family. I am considering that those facts represent the highlights of my childhood.

Most of my career was connected with real estate. As a Chartered Appraiser, I have been in the management of real estate, mortgage director, appraiser and then I worked in the real estate investment business as an analyst and supervising portfolio appraising (to standardise appraising methods). When I retired from Caisse de dépôt et placement du Québec in September 1997 (after 22 years), their real estate portfolio value was around $3,5 billions dollars. This portfolio was spread in many countries like: Canada, United States, England, Ireland, France, Belgium, Mexico, Poland and a few others that I can’t remember.

When you live in a condominium, you just dream of water and fresh air. So, a couple of years ago, Andrée (my wife) and I bought a 33 ft travel trailer which is installed on a small campsite, edging the lake in the municipality of Lac-aux-Sables (about an hour north of Trois-Rivières). So, we live there from May 15^th until September 15^th. In 1998, I made the acquisition of a 16 ft fibreglass rowboat on which is installed a 30 hp Yamaha outboard motor. This is replacing the 12,4 ft Zodiac (Achille) that I bought in 1990. I just love to be on the water; it is so relaxing except on weekends. Before we bought the travel trailer, I would go boating in the area of Sorel, Berthier and Maskinongé. This is an exceptional area with 101 islands, microclimate, birds, etc. It is just wonderful. When I was a teenager, I had my first motorcycle, a 650 cc Triumph «Thunderbird». I had to sell it because my first wife didn’t want to hear about it. In 1991, I bought a 1989 Yamaha Royal Venture, 1300cc and a trailer. Andrée and I have travelled quite a lot and we were doing camping with the refrigerator on the tongue, connected to the motorcycle’s battery. I sold this motorcycle at the end of the season 1999. I finally had to make a choice between motorcycling and boating since both are practised during the summer season and Andrée wasn’t to kindle anymore, so that explains why I sold it. During Spring and Fall, I sometimes take English saddle courses with Andrée’s daughter.

I have two children: my daughter Lyne was born in 1961. She is married to Claude Sauvageau and they have two girls, Myriam born in 1990 and Mélanie born in 1994. My son was born in 1965 and is married to Isabelle Turmel and they have two boys, Yannick born in 1993, Philippe born in 1999 and a girl, Carolane born in 1995. Lyne is living in Laval and Luc is living in Lavaltrie.

Your next question is kind of hard to answer, as I never did think about what my descendants should know about my life and me. I guess my daughter will have to do it by herself into the family book.

When we are getting old, the future is mostly behind. I wish to be healthy for a long time in order to realize our family book. There are so many things to do before getting to it. I would also like to continue some voluntary work at the camp and also for La Société de Généalogie de la Mauricie et des Bois-Francs, maybe with some more genealogy stories.

RÉAL DUFRESNE

It was beautiful weather on November 19^th. We found our way to the Batiscan parish hall quite easily (from the Laviolette’s suites in Trois-Rivières). Jean Robert and Benoît were already there moving tables and chairs. And then the caterers arrived and we had to redo all the arrangements! But everyone remained in good cheer. There was this special electricity in the air, the kind that circulates when a group of Rivards get together. We had a great day, including a hot meal served at the table, which was excellent. The wine (on the house) greatly enhanced the atmosphere!

Our speaker, with the assistance of André Dufresne got into a description of the artifacts which were found on the site where, we are almost 100 % sure, was located Nicolas’ house. The land is adjacent to the Old Presbytery *.

After the lecture and the formalities, a small caravan, made up of highly motivated Rivards, drove from Batiscan back to Nicolas’ farm. The leader of the pack was none other than André who in the enthusiasm of the moment rushed from his car into the recently ploughed fields, forgetting his keys inside his locked car. This created quite a problem for a while but eventually he was rescued by Jean Robert who had a cell phone. This was most fortunate since the afore-said caravan was in the middle of nowhere !

Of course, we all had a good laugh at the expense of our highly organized cousin ! But the sequence is even funnier. Picture a dozen Rivards in their city shoes, running over a wet ploughed field, bending down and scouring the earth with their bare hands.

Twenty years ago, when I first walked on Nicolas’ farm, I spotted pieces of slates and stones which formed a rectangle whose dimensions fitted the description of an early settler’s home. (Quite small, maybe 18’ deep with a 22’ façade). This site is almost in line with Nicolas’ memorial plaque. From there, if you look East to the neighboring field, you will see a small rise. If you walk over you will see the tell tale evidence that I have described.

But please, do not disturb the site. Leave it for the professional team that will eventually go over the grounds. The few pieces that were picked up that November afternoon will be added to the existing collection which for the time being, belongs to the land owner.

Our visit to the site was at the end of a long day. It was 17:00h by the time we found a small inn in Champlain (another stronghold of the Rivards), in order to hold an executive meeting to start planning new activities in 2002.

During the exercise 2000 / 2001, we held 14 such meeting in various places in the Province and we produced 4 activities, which led to recruiting 126 new members.

What is the purpose of all this effort ? The A.I.F.R. has pledged to become an international center for the Rivards, the Dit Bellefeuille, Dit Dufresne, Dit Feuilleverte, Dit Giasson, Dit LaCoursière, Dit LaGlanderie, Dit Lanouette, Dit Lavigne, Dit Loranger, Dit Maisonville, Dit Montendre, Dit Pérusse and Dit Préville.

This is no small undertaking ! Membership will be increased as fund-raising activities continue. The publication of the ‘‘ Rivardière ’’ has to come out on time three times a year, our web-site has to be maintained, and we are thinking of a permanent secretariat.

What will such a Center do ? It will provide genealogical and historical information to its members. It will seek to develop a physical presence in the region where the Rivards originated. It will make sure that the ‘‘ Rivardière ’’ will continue to provide accurate information and it will engage in projects which will tend to promote internationally the extended Rivard Family.

We are very grateful to the members of the Forum who have joined us. We are making slow progress in the U.S.A., but we are progressing ! Joe Lavigne has joined our Executive Committee. The proximity of New England makes it attractive to develop a Chapter in that area. We can only take one step at a time. But to quote one of Ghandi’s famous line: ‘‘ A walk of 2000 miles starts with one step.’’ Where will we be in 5 years’ time ? It depends on many factors.

However, the most important one is the degree of enthusiasm that can be generated by our Association’s members. If you like history, particularly your family’s history, join us. The A.I.F.R. might well become an important source of information. Its hard working executive members will do everything they can to maintain a high quality of service.

I cannot end this article (written in January), without saying that I, on behalf of the executive members of the A.I.F.R. wish you the best year you have ever had, good health and much love in your life.

Sincerely yours,
 
 

Jim Rivard, Public Relation Director

Founding President of the A.I.F.R.

* The Old Presbytery
340, rue Principale, Batiscan QC G0X 1A0
Tel : (418) 362-2051 / Fax : (418) 362-3174.

A tourist attraction situated on land that initially was owned by Nicolas Rivard.
Adjacent to the property is the actual homestead of our common ancestor, where he lived and where he died.

December was a rather slow month on the forum with only three hundred and twenty-nine messages being sent. Many of these messages were Christmas greetings to the cousins. The number of cousins has increased from 312 to 316 members. We would love to hear from those of you who are new to the forum. We would like to know about your family tree and share what information we have with you and learn more about your family. Two of our new members are Susan Revard Bordwell and Gloria in Maryland who descends from the Loranger line. Susan is a first cousin, once removed to Lorraine Naze. Welcome to the forum, Cousins.

WHAT WE LEARNED THIS MONTH:

• That Nicolas LaVigne, an artist at the Renaissance Festival in Phoenix, is from Wisconsin.
• That Nina Jackman enjoyed the "Cirque Orchestra" from Quebec. This is a performance of acrobats and circus flyers that perform to music.
• Larry Lacoursiére corrected 13 mistakes on his birth record by simply going to the Minnesota State record archives in 1951.
• French Canadian accents can be done using a series of numbers while holding down the alternate key and using the number pad. This listing of numbers can be found in message # 23998 in the forum archives. (http://groups.yahoo.com/group/rivard_forum/messages)
• That Leciuster means a cook, like one in a lumber camp.
• That a few cousins are getting ads in the body of their messages on both the chat and the forum.
• That there is no Bill 602 in the US Congress to charge people for email messages. This is a hoax that has been going around the Internet for some time now.

CONDOLENCES AND PRAYERS: went out to Nina Jackman who lost her son on December 28. Tom was only 56 years old. Prayers also went out for the nephew of Tony and Sandy Rivard, Matt Rivard, so that he would come through serious surgery.

A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE: Sandy Rivard credits her husband, Tony, with saving the life of her mother on Christmas day by giving her CPR when she was having a heart attack. One never knows when such a skill will be needed.

CONGRATULATIONS: went out to Billy and Ijarah Rivard on the birth of their new baby daughter born on December 4 in Baudette, MN. Billy is the nephew of Marlyss Hernandez.

HELP NEEDED:

• Carol was given an explanation when she requested one on the differences between the marriage banns, marriage contract, license and date.
• Pat asked for help in finding the marriage record of Joseph R. Lavigne. He married Cora H. Staples sometime around 1890/1891/1892 most likely somewhere in Maine.
• Lance asked for help in getting information on his uncle, Ed Loranger, who was a policeman in Ontario, CA.
• Lorraine asked if anyone had a clarification of some of the information in the Osage/Chouteau file she had copied from what JG submitted.

TIDBITS:

• Mary Ann is working on inputting the Lacoursiére, Maisonville, and Rivarde lines into the database.
• Nickie posted Civil War Pension Records with Rivard surnames. Alexis and Antoine were on a couple of the records.
• Pictures of Charles dit Loranger Rivard and his wife, Louise Rivard were also posted.
• A list of Rivards and their burial places was posted in message # 24041.
• The marriage information from Jette's pages 481-482 on the Gauvin surname was posted in message # 24054.
• Four Dufresnes were posted: Pierre Joseph 1872-1946, Alexander-Napoléon 1855-1924, Joseph 1808-1873, and Alexander 1818-1877. The parents of these Dufresnes are not in the database and we do not know if they are connected to the Rivards or not. More research is needed to identify these Dufresnes.

The Chat like the forum was also hit with badtrans attachments in the month of December. It appears that the infected messages came from Denise & Serge's computer unit. Denise did an un-subscribe from the chat until she could find an RX to remedy the problem. Jim Lacourciere has been updating the chat with the most recent virus up-dates so our members remain on alert to all new virus threats. Likewise, Dottie checks all new alerts with the inter-net HOAX engines and keeps our membership advised. Thanks Guys, your efforts are appreciated.

Computer Batteries … A tip from Jim L.: When I bought my computer I was told that there were batteries to keep the clock, date, memory, etc working in case of a power failure. You should contact your computer salesman and ask him they may even do it for free especially if fairly new. For the slowness your short term memory is more than likely getting full especially if 32k or below. Good luck

It wasn't difficult to realize that football season was coming to a conclusion with the play-off games commencing in December. Because of this Viking Trivia was pass on for the football fans on the forum. This made Packer fans happy but those born & raised in Minnesota weren't quite as happy.

The dreaded topic of snow came up on the 15^th of December with everyone agreeing that a little snow would be nice for Christmas … but only a little. It was further decided that tossing snowballs at the weatherman could be a possible RX for keeping the white stuff at bay. I think it worked in Packer-land because our first real snowfall didn't arrive until January and it was really pretty.

The Darwin Awards were posted to the chat 12 -02-2001 by none other than Dottie. For those who don't know about it, the Darwin Awards are awarded every year to the person(s) who died in the stupidest way, thereby removing themselves from the gene pool...) For those of you who are interested in unusual accidents you may find this message enlightening.

Additional things we learned on the chat in the month of December include:

• That tornado's have never been blessed with names, only hurricanes & Wisconsin's snow-storm's have been thus blessed.

• That there are many things a person can ponder including; "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?

• A long list of things that has taken some people, 50 years to learn.

• The flip side of Hall-mark Greeting Cards … What Hall-mark doesn't print and cards you will never see their logo on.

• The importance of proper pronunciation

• And last but not least … The five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred.

2. Free your mind from worries.

3. Live simply.

4. Give more.

5. Expect less.

Substitutions when needed!

Emergency Ingredient Substitutions Baking Ingredients
 
 

Apple pie spice, 1 tsp.

Substitute: 1/2 tsp. ground cinnamon plus 1/4 tsp. ground nutmeg, 1/8 tsp. ground allspice, and dash ground cloves or ginger

Baking powder, 1 tsp.

Substitute: 1/2 tsp. cream of tartar plus 1/4 tsp. baking soda

Buttermilk, 1 cup

Substitute: Sour Milk: 1 tablespoon lemon juice or vinegar plus enough milk to make 1 cup. (Let stand 5 minutes before using.) Or, 1 cup plain yogurt

Chocolate, semisweet, 1 ounce

Substitute: 3 tablespoons semisweet chocolate pieces. Or, 1 ounce unsweetened chocolate plus 1 tablespoon sugar

Chocolate, sweet baking, 4 ounces

Substitute: 1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder plus 1/3 cup sugar and 3 tablespoons shortening

Chocolate, unsweetened, 1 ounce

Substitute: 3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder plus 1 tablespoon cooking

oil or shortening, melted

Cornstarch, 1 tablespoon (for thickening)

Substitute: 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour

Corn syrup, 1 cup

Substitute: 1 cup granulated sugar plus 1/4 cup water

Egg, 1 whole

Substitute: 2 egg whites. Or, 2 egg yolks. Or, 1/4 cup frozen egg product,

thawed

Flour, cake, 1 cup

Substitute: 1 cup minus 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour

Flour, self-rising, 1 cup

Substitute: 1 cup all-purpose flour plus 1 tsp. baking powder, 1/2 tsp.

salt, and 1/4 tsp. baking soda

Fruit liqueur, 1 tablespoon

Substitute: 1 tablespoon fruit juice

Gingerroot, grated, 1 tsp.

Substitute: 1/4 tsp. ground ginger

Half-and-half or light cream, 1 cup

Substitute: 1 tablespoon melted butter plus enough whole milk to make 1 cup

Honey, 1 cup

Substitute: 1-1/4 cups granulated sugar plus 1/4 cup water

Mascarpone cheese, 8 ounces

Substitute: 8 ounces regular cream cheese

Milk, 1 cup

Substitute: 1/2 cup evaporated milk plus 1/2 cup water. Or 1 cup water plus

1/3 cup nonfat dry milk powder

Molasses, 1 cup

Substitute: 1 cup honey

Sour cream, dairy, 1 cup

Substitute: 1 cup plain yogurt

Sugar, granulated, 1 cup

Substitute: 1 cup packed brown sugar

What kind of wine goes with Chinese food, red or white? Answer: none of the above. Beer is good, but in a restaurant where the clientele is mostly Chinese, don't be surprised to find a bottle of Scotch on the table. And why not? The Chinese were probably the first to distill liquor. It happened around 800 B. C. They began with rice beer. After brewing it, they poured it back into the next batch that was brewing. Repeating this a few times drove the alcohol level from 10 to 40 percent, producing a potent drink called arrack.

A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor I have this problem with gas, but it really doesn't bother me too much. My farts never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You didn't know I was farting because they don't smell and are silent."

The doctor says, "I see. Take these pills and come back to see me next week."

The next week the lady comes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the heck you gave me, but now my farts... although still silent... stink terribly."

The doctor says, "Good!!! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's work on your hearing."