Author: Yamuri

e-mail: yamuri@yahoo.com

Rating: G

Warning: mentions chara-death

Note: It’s set in an alternate universe I created…some might know some basics from my fanfiction Jesse Blue

Dear Star Sheriffs,

I don’t know if I will ever send away this letter, if anyone would be interested and like to read it. Probably nobody would care, because there’s no reason in listening and believing the words of a traitor. In all those years you’ve never understood. Why should you understand now? Words have to grow my stepfather told me once. Truth lays in those words and I guess it took me pretty long to find the right words. Back then I made a lot of mistakes. I admit that and I’m sorry.

You’re laughing now, right? Jesse Blue saying sorry is too funny. But I tell you what, I don’t care anymore about what others think and believe. I’m finally over it. What lies in the past is past now and I’m a new man. The Jesse Blue you knew died during the last battle against the outriders.

I was walking over a thin line, becoming almost like him. My best friend, my worst enemy…Nemesis. And now I’m sitting here, writing this letter about the true myth, about the true past of those you call Outriders. Cluems, that’s what we call ourselves and we aren’t phantom beings as you think. We’re only using advanced technique which makes it possible for us to teleport.

Did you know dear Saber Rider, that all those Outriders you stopped with your sword were actually killed? While laser guns have no effect blades actually injure and kill us. It’s true, you can believe me.

But I didn’t plan on talking about you, but me. I won’t talk about the Jesse Blue you’ve known…but the real me. Of course I could tell you to ask Snake, but he suffered enough. I’m sorry that I couldn’t protect you Snake and I’m glad that the Star Sheriffs did. Tell him that if you meet him, I know you do.

We grew up together. Him and me. On planet Far, a long time ago. Still I remember it as if it was yesterday. I was seven when I was kidnapped by the Cluems and brought to their artificial planet. They told me that I’m not human at all and wanted me to become like them. Of course I refused and rebelled against their education. It did no good as you can imagine. They tortured me, but I wouldn’t give up. If Jean Claude wouldn’t have helped me, I would have never managed to escape and go back to planet Far.

I thought I could turn back time. But I wasn’t able to do so. Unfortunately I wasn’t able to protect my home either. I still feel guilty and sad. It was my first sin. Due to my escape Cluems came to planet Far and killed my stepfather. All I could do to protect Snake was to go with them willingly, to promise to become a good Cluem.

My second sin was to agree to Nemesis wicked plan to send me to the Star Sheriff Academy. He knew very well that I wanted to become a human, a real human. I wanted to get rid of my Cluem half completely and thus I agreed to his plan. They created a human clone body, with my memories and intelligence. A perfect clone, I have to admit. From the outside he was a human, but inside he was like a Cluem. They tricked me to climb into a phantom chamber and that’s where I have been for the last remaining years. I didn’t age much and someone else lived my life.

He was a perfect spy, sent to the Star Sheriff Academy to study you. But he failed due to his lack of emotions. I know he told you that he loves you April and after reading this, if you ever happen to read it, you will wonder how his words could have been true. Well, it was a lie. Like everything. A trick to get your trust...but deep inside he wasn’t all bad. All he wanted was to be complete. I guess that’s why he told you he loves you. I guess deep inside he had this idea…you know. He thought only a human woman could make him complete could give back what he lost or never had, his emotions and the knowledge about his true origin. You were worthy in his eyes and he hoped you would help him achieve his goal.

Everyone needs a home, a family. He had nothing. He was created to be Nemesis tool. Nevertheless he was a part of me and that’s why his sins are also my sins. It was a long and hard way for him to discover the truth, to find out who he really is and what the phantom chambers are for. Most are prisons, prisons for those who were against Nemesis rules.

It made him desperate when he discovered the truth and he changed. You didn’t notice that, right? You thought he’s still the same and in a way he was even worse. He became almost like Nemesis, but in the end he was on your side. To protect me he distracted Nemesis and you.

This was my last sin. When I learned about my clone I allowed him to sacrifice himself for the sake of me, for the ideal world I wanted to create. I’m sad and sorry for him. Thanks to him I’m finally free and even Nemesis thinks I’m dead. The prize was high and I don’t want something like that to happen ever again.

Maybe I shouldn’t leave my hideout. Maybe it would be better to forget about the past, to destroy this letter and continue my new life here on Lamari. You remember Lamari, don’t you? The project was revived. My project, our project. You thought Cluems wanted to trick humans here. But you were wrong. The only fault my clone and Jean Claude did was to hide the weapons. We changed that now. Humans and we are living together peacefully again and the base with the Renegades…everyone can come in and see. We’re building those weapons to protect our paradise, in case that Nemesis comes back with his army. Humans know and we exchange our knowledge. Probably I shouldn’t risk peace here with writing this letter.

But I’m sorry that things went this way. I’m sorry for my sins and I would like to meet you guys one day. Perhaps we could talk about the past then and build a bridge, like others did before. Those humans and Cluems on Lamari were able to accept us, us who’re both Cluems and Humans. They gave us a home and allowed us to stay. There’re we’re thankful.

I know, we’re the key for such a bridge and one day there could be real peace between Cluems and Humans. We’re similar in a way and I want you to know about our true past, not the fake past Commander Eagle got to know about. The true one….

Jesse Blue