“Come on, Sam” said Hamfast, “we’ve got to get back home now, there’s plenty to do afore you leave!”
Sam sighed and turned away with his father.
“It’s all my fault, Gaffer!” said Frodo. “I could not sleep, so I asked Sam to keep me company.
Please, don’t be angry with him ..”
“Mr. Frodo!” Sam protested.
“Go Sam, go with your father.”
* * *
“So lad, what’s going on between you and Sam? You’ve been behaving so strange lately. Does this have something to do with Sam leaving?”
“I don’t know, uncle,” answered Frodo, pouring himself some tea left from Bilbo’s first breakfast.
Bilbo watched Frodo with worry and tenderness. He loved his young cousin a great deal.
“You love him, don’t you?”
“I said I don’t know!” Frodo snapped harshly, then calmed down. “I’m sorry Bilbo, I don’t know what’s happening to me, I feel so bad now … I don’t want him to leave, Bilbo, I can’t bear this!”
Last night he’d had the firm intention of fighting for Sam’s love, but now, before Bilbo, all his resolution seemed to have left him and he felt fragile and exposed. All sort of doubts had assailed him, leaving him uncertain and guilty, especially for Sam’s future.
“You do love him!”
“Yes!”
At this, Frodo was overwhelmed by embarrassment and fear, because he sensed that everything that had seemed so beautiful and strong the night before was in fact totally wrong. Or maybe it wasn’t wrong at all … Frodo couldn’t tell anymore, it was so hard now, and Sam was leaving. He started to weep.
“There, there, dear lad, please!” Bilbo sounded alarmed and offered Frodo his handkerchief.
“I’ve never felt this way for anyone Bilbo,” confessed Frodo. “I tried to deny it, but it was too strong, and I was so scared. I wanted to talk with you about this, but it seemed so strange to me. So good, but also so strange … and wrong, in some way.”
“There’s nothing wrong with love, Frodo.”
“It seemed wrong to me all the same. I was afraid for Sam, for everything. I was afraid that you would have not understood!”
“Why, you should know me by now. You should know what people call me, Frodo. They call me Mad Baggins. Maybe the reason is that I see things differently. I’m not as thick and dull-minded as most of the hobbits here, for Eru’s sake.”
A pale smile appeared through Frodo’s tears. “Yes Bilbo, that’s why I happily agreed to live here with you.”
“Yes, dear boy, and, like me, you have an open mind, as well as a great heart. You are definitely more of a Baggins than a Brandybuck.”
“But now what can I do to get Sam to stay here? The Gaffer seems immoveable in his decision … I’m so afraid I’m the cause of all this mess.”
“No Frodo, don’t say that,” Bilbo replied, trying to reassure him.
