All the Small Things:  3 Weddings and a Funeral:  1 Day to Wedding Bells

(Crowded around the entrance to the 2nd level of Geffen dungeon sit 2 Knights, a Hunter, and Assassin. The two knights (Quell and Zace) sit adjacent, facing each other, while the Hunter (Ding0) sits two steps from and facing the Assassin (Pam).)

Ding0: Damnit. Why me?
Pam: (with a question mark overhead.) Do you have something against Assassin women?
Ding0: (sweatdrops.) Of course not, Pam! I just don't like to be in relationships.
Pam: (holds silence dots for a few seconds.)
Ding0: I'm just a Hunter that likes to solo. You've known me long enough to see.
Pam: (stands up.) You like men, don't you??
Ding0: (sweatdrops.)
Pam: It's true! You NEVER take any interest in women!
Ding0: It's not that...
Pam: (stands up, walks a few steps to the left, and turns back to Ding0.) Agh, I should've known you'd be a, a queer.

(Quell holds silence dots, while Zace walks to and faces Pam with dark clouds.)

Zace: Excuse me?
Pam: (turns towards Zace.) What is it?
Zace: (still with dark clouds.) Say again, Pam?
Quell: Zace....
Ding0: I'm not a queer.
Pam: What? That Ding0 likes guys? Is odd? A queer? (has a laugh sign overhead.)
Zace: (with dark clouds.) What's so ODD about him liking men?
Quell: Zace, sit down...
Ding0: I swear to God-Poing I'm straight!
Pam: Well, it just is. That and the marriage system is only for A man and A woman.
Zace: I will not sit and let us be insulted!
Ding0: And for the last time, I just don't want to be in a relationship!
Pam: Hold on, what do you mean "insulted"?
Quell: Zace...
Pam: (sweatdrops.) And...why is your emblem made of two male signs?
Ding0: (has a question mark as he turns towards Zace.) Hmm...
Quell: ...
Zace: ...
Pam: (turns to Quell, then Zace.) You two are queers?
Zace: (holds dark clouds.) WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?
Ding0: You shouldn't say that, Pam!
Pam: (turns towards Ding0.) Well, what ARE those two, then??
Quell: (holds silence dots.) ...
Zace: (with dark clouds.) !!!
Zace: (holds a silence dots sign.) -sighs- Pam, in my dreams always remains a knight in shining armor.
Pam: Huh?
Quell: He means me. (hangs a peace/victory sign.)
Ding0: Oh.
Zace: (walks back to Quell, sits next to him, and has a heart sign overhead.)
Pam: (sweatdrops.) This is just odd.
Ding0: Why?
Quell: (mirrors Zace, turning towards him.) Whisper...pss...pss...
Pam: Love is for A man and A woman! Why else hasn't Gravity implemented marriages for same gender couples?
Ding0: (sweatdrops.) Chill out, Pam.
Zace: (turns towards Pam with dark clouds.) Because IRO has only one gm and it can't handle that many marriages!
Quell: ...Or divorces.
Ding0: Ah.
Zace: Quell, you'd never want such a thing, would you? (faces Quell with a sob sign.)
Quell: Course not!
Pam: Fine. As long as no qu...thesbian person hits on me, "to each his own".
Quell: ...
Zace: (faces Pam.) Deal. (turns back towards Quell.)
Ding0: (has a laugh sign.) You didn't notice Karen alt-4-ing you?
Pam: What? She wasn't hearting that Blacksmith?
Ding0: (has an x sign overhead.) Man, Pam, didn't you see her guild emblem?
Pam: No, what?
Ding0: (with a music sign.) It's something like Zace and Quell's.
Pam: (sweatdrops.)





(In Northern Alberta, within the Sea Side Villa, stand a Wizard (Dustin) and Acolyte (Lucius) a few steps from each other.)

Dustin: Go ahead.
Lucius: *sighs* Adrianne stayed true to you.
Dustin: So I don't have to pay as much.
Lucius: (has an exclamation mark, then silence dots.) ...Until outside Culvert.
Dustin: (has a silence dots sign.) What happened?
Lucius: The Pimp started a few kiss and heart signs.
Lucius: She responded with her own.
Dustin: (with a question mark.) Joking?
Lucius: Asked her that. She said no.
Dustin: ...
Lucius: Then I asked her, "What about your fiance?"
Dustin: ...
Lucius: Her words were, "My heart has changed."
Dustin: ....
Lucius: She said that she liked the Pimp.
Lucius: So, she and him told me to keep it private.
Lucius: They don't know we've met.
Dustin: Addy wouldn't do this.
Lucius: (with silence dots signs.) ...she did.
Dustin: ...
Lucius: They've been like that ever since.
Dustin: ...
Dustin: (with silence dots.) I don't want to hear any more. I'll deal you.
Lucius: Thanks.
Lucius: ...What are you going to do?
Dustin: Nothing.
Lucius: (with a question mark.) What?
Dustin: I love Addy. I know she'll confess.
Lucius: ...
Dustin: From there, we can work it out.
Lucius: I see.
Lucius: ...Will you mention what I told you?
Dustin: No. You've done your job.
Lucius: ...
Dustin: I'm off to Payon. (walks out of the building.)
Lucius: ...





(In the Thieves Guild at the entrance to Basement level two of the Pyramids sit an Assassin (Bob), Blacksmith (Four), and Priestess (Candy). Bob and Candy sit together, both facing the portal, while Four sits off to the right with an "Afk - Healing." chat room above her head.)

Candy: Can't believe those two respawned.
Bob: Ah, I can expect it from Ert. That dunce.
Candy: I had enough sp for both Garnet and Herbert's rez.
Candy: Lol. Yeah.
Bob: ROFL! Their save points are both on Biliban! (has a laugh sign overhead.)
Candy: They didn't save in Morroc.
Bob: We gave them ample time to, though.
Bob: ^o^ Ert's rubbing off on Garnet.
Candy: Yeah. Ah, I miss her already.
Bob: (turns towards Candy.) I miss Ert.
Bob: But, I've missed you more. (has a kiss sign overhead.)
Candy: (mirrors the kiss sign.) ...
Bob: It's been awhile since we've been alone together.
Candy: Levelling.
Bob: Yeah. We've levelled how much since our engagements?
Candy: (holds silence dots signs.) ...
Candy: They'll find out about us.
Bob: (with a peace/victory sign.) We're not reckless, Candy. No one has a clue. ^o^
Candy: ...
Candy: I love Garnet.
Bob: (holds dark clouds.) And you think I don't love Ert?
Candy: You do.
Candy: Or at least now.
Bob: ^O^ No, always. What do you mean, now?
Candy: The way you talked to him before this engagement. It was like regular friends.
Bob: Well, we've always been friends.
Candy: Yeah, but ever since the funeral, you two have been in love.
Bob: (holds silence dots.) How so?
Candy: The kiss and heart signs. The words you say to each other.
Bob: Not as much as with you, when we're alone. (has a kiss sign overhead.)
Candy: (has the opposite kiss sign.) Just as much.
Bob: (sweatdrops.) Candy, I have to be honest.
Bob: You've been fooled for God-Poing knows how long.
Candy: ...
Candy: What?
Bob: That day when Ert and I mentioned our marriage plans...
Candy: Yeah?
Bob: Well, we had just planned it that very moment.
Candy: (has an exclamation mark.) What do you mean?
Bob: At first, our marriage was just a scam.
Candy: (holds silence dots.) ...
Bob: Candy?
Candy: You greedy (expletive with a dot in between its letters.).
Bob: (sweatdrops.) W...what? (after a few seconds, a lightbulb sign appears overhead.)
Bob: No, we weren't after wedding gifts. ^o^
Candy: Oh.
Candy: ...
Bob: You see, we were planning from this, to get...
Candy: Then what was this ploy for?
Bob: Women.
Bob: ^o^
Candy: (has silence dots.) ...
Candy: (holds an irritated sign.) That's one of the MOST retarded things I've ever heard in RO!
Bob: (has a kiss sign, then music sign.) It worked, though. ^o^
Candy: .....................................
Bob: Right, love? (holds a laugh sign.)
Candy: I feel stupid.





-Notes-

Sorry if the Pam/Ding0/Zace/Quell conversation offended you. It's just that this was inspired by the homerserxuality/bixerxuality in RO thread on www.ro-world.com. A LOT of opinions were expressed there, and I only was able to put in a few into this story. Aw, well.

Hmm...I had thought of other routes for this plot, but this is how it turned out. -sweatdrops- Oh, and don't assume on the couples from what some characters in it say. Plus, there might just be a turn in the story.

Oh, and sorry for the brevity/lack of quality of this chapter/story. That and, sorry to those this story was based on. Seriously, your characters in RO are TOO intriguing to NOT write about! ^_^

Comments/Flames/Suggestions are always welcome.