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| BLOODY MALLORY (2002)- A colourful, comic-bookesque team of freelance monster-hunters are hired to rescue the Pope from a mysterious gang of unknown beings. Mallory and her team venture into a diabolical realm to battle and outwit traps and various monsters. While it's not the best movie of the last few years, it is fun and very entertaining. Sometimes, things make no sense and about 3 scenes look like they've had something edited out for some reason, as if they're unfinished. It has a very good musical soundtrack. The film moves along at a good pace. The action scenes are well-filmed and well-performed. A very fun flick that needed a few more days and a few more dollars for its budget. It's probably too campy for most folks. This is a foreign film, so you'll have to deal with subtitles. Check it out if you can find it. |
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| DARK ASYLUM (2002)- A serial killer called "The Trasher" is captured and sent to a hospital, which is affected by a power failure; the electricity shuts down, the exits are locked, and the killer is roaming free. A psychologist/profiler tries to survive the night, with the help of a custodian that might be a forgotten patient from the past. This was a really nice surprise. I didn't expect to like it much, but rented it anyway, because the description did sound promising. I wasn't disappointed at all. This movie has very good pacing, good acting, appropriate lighting, a few good "survival skill"/"trap-making" scenes, and a menacing ambience amongst its 90+ minutes. With the exception of the opening scene, which is well-done and has a cool "under the sewer" lair sequence, the rest of the movie is pretty much a long chase inside the hospital, but it's not tedious. A good rent if you'd like a suspense movie that's a wee bit more violent here & there than the usual humdrum straight-to-video suspense films that are usually just filled with vocal suspense. |
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| DRIVE (1997)- Three strangers, one a bio-enhanced martial artist on the run, one a recently-downsized wannabe writer with his own problems, and a sexy, unstable girl looking for excitement all become targets of a ruthless businessman and his relentless assassins. I love this movie. I rented it from Blockbuster because Brittany Murphy and Mark Dacascos are in it; I'm a big fan of both. The title "Drive" was a bad choice, but who cares about movie titles? Packed with stunning action and good comedic touches here and there, this is a lot of fun packed into 112 minutes (that's if you see the "director's cut" version of the movie, which you really should if you can find it; if not, the regular version which is available at most Blockbuster's is still plenty entertaining). Though this movie came out a few years before "Rush Hour", that's the movie you'll be thinking of while watching it. Kadeem Hardison's character is just as mean & bossy as Chris Tucker's in "Rush Hour", but at least he's got a good reason for it. All in all, a really fun, cool flick. |
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| FREEWAY 2: CONFESSIONS OF A TRICK BABY (1999)- A bulimic dilinquent and a psychotic killer escape prison and head for Mexico, leaving a trail of demented mayhem along the way. Once they get to Tijuana, then they're the ones in danger. You can't believe how twisted this film is. Wow-weeeee! While watching this flick, I kept thinking , "This is such an ugly movie!" Besides its overall ugliness, it does have some very cool imagery and occurences: 1) It was really interesting how the dialog in certain scenes was altered, using that telephone line effect, 2) the creepy hunchback, 3) great soundtrack (I wish it was available to purchase somewhere), and 4) the way the movie turned around and gets even wackier and more surreal toward the end at the church. Just like the first "Freeway", this one also has a fairytale theme to it. If you're in a weird mood and have a strong stomach, check out this awesomely disturbing film. Not for the squeamish. |
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| THE GIRL WITH THE HUNGRY EYES (1995)- I couldn't understand the story of this movie well at all and it is quite sluggish in places, but it does have a gorgeous yet eerie lady to gawk at in the main character of Louise, a vampire who is possessed by some guy obsessed with her finding a key and some legal papers to a building for some reason. The opening sequence shows that something which occured in the 1930's has something to do with what's going on in the rest of the movie, but, as I said, I couldn't figure it out . Gorgeous, yet at times unalluring, Kristina Fulton does a decent job of delivering her lines, but she's the kind of actress that probably would have excelled in the silent era of films, because she's much more convincing and creepy and believable when she's using her eyes, facial expressions and body language to convey her character's intentions. The movie has a couple of good cinematic angles and perspectives, but overall it's only decent. It is moody and has a nice foreign look to it, though, if you're looking for that in a movie. |
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| HIGHWAYMEN (2003)- A psychopath who kills women using his car as his weapon has been pursued for the last 5 years by the husband of a previous victim. When a victim finally survives, she becomes a pawn in the two mens conflict and eventual meeting. This movie SHOULD'VE gotten a theatrical release. I first heard about it because I've been a Rhona Mitra fan ever since her early days as the very first Lara Croft model back in 1995. She's been gradually forming an acting career since then and she's very good and always improving. The guy that directed "The Hitcher" directed this movie and both films have the same lonely, victim-esque atmosphere, except that the male and female leads are together for a short while. Acting is super. Stunts are well done. Suspense very well done. [POSSIBLE SPOILER-highlight the next couple of lines if you're interested] You're lead to believe the villain is almost a type of superbeing or a robot for a while, which was a nice surprise since there's never any hint of that in the trailer. [END OF POSSIBLE SPOILER] I went into this movie with high hopes and I wasn't disappointed. I think that anyone expecting some sort of "Fast & the Furious", "Deathrace 2000" and "Friday the 13th" hybrid movie might be disappointed, though. It has a really good/appropriate soundtrack, too. |
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| KING OF THE ANTS (2003)- A young drifter is offered money to kill a man. Then he gets stiffed on the payment & is tortured. Then he escapes his captors. Then it's their turn. Gruesome! What a strange movie! This film really stays in your mind long after watching it. The good guy is hard to root for since he's also a killer who doesn't seem remorseful. While it's not the kind of movie I was expecting to see (the director Stuart Gordon usually makes monster movies), I still enjoyed it though I feel guilty saying so due to its nasty and gruesome atmosphere. I liked seeing George Wendt as a bad guy; he's good at it. The acting is superb, except for the main actor's line deliveries at the end of the movie. Although it's not a horror movie, horrific stuff occurs and the hallucination scenes are quite wicked. Also, it's one of those few movies where you can't rely on basic plot routines, even though the story is a basic plot. It's just an odd story about a guy who made a mistake and paid dearly for it, and from then on it's a revenge tale. Not an epic story, but it has a composition to it that makes you think it could have actually been based on a true story. Check it out, but be prepared to be grossed out at least three times in ways you've probably never been before. |
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| LEARNING CURVE (1998)- A new substitute teaches the school's bullies/rapists/ingrates a lesson they'll never forget by making learning an absolute necessity of survival, literally. A really great cult flick that's not considered a cult flick yet. I'd never heard of this movie anywhere; I only found out about it because I saw a trailer for it when I rented "Maniacts". The adult characters are well-portrayed and a couple of the students are as well. I was always constantly wanting to know what would happen next and I was never bored. The movie does have 3 problems, though: 1) the reason for not being allowed to use the schoolbooks to teach the students was unbelievable and stupid 2) the "tease"/ "hot chick" just wasn't convincing and didn't have the looks to back up her character. The "bullies" and the "ultimate rebel" just weren't convincing enough at all times, plus the school looked too clean for a place that had been denied maintenance and supposedly in disrepair.. 3) For some reason, the first third of the movie was made to be comedic here and there; it just didn't work. I loved the movie, despite those problems though. |
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| THE LOST SKELETON OF CADAVRA (2001)- Rare element Atmospherium is needed by a good-natured scientist, two stranded space aliens, and an evil doctor hoping to revive an ancient legend in an old cave. A meteor has recently landed, containing the element. Who will find it first? Will the good scientist be able to study it and thus further the field of science? Will the aliens find it and use it to power their spaceship and return home? Will the evil doctor use it to resurrect the Lost Skeleton of Cadavra and doom mankind forever? If you are a fan of badly-written sci-fi b-movies of the late 50'/early 60's and you want to see an homage and a dedicated imitation at the same time, check check out this gem. This is so well-done, but you MUST be a fan of such films to really appreciate it; otherwise, it may seem idiotic. The dialogue in the movie is very well-done, as well as overdone, but that was just fine with me, because I understand the homagesness (I know that's not a real word, but I don't know how to say "dedication to honouring the silliness of old b-movie cheesiness"). I must admit that another portion of this film that totally captivated me was Jennifer Blaire (Animala), but I know I'd still adore the movie, even if she was not part of it. These kinds of movies are either hit-or-miss. I've seen a few movies in the 90's that tried to do the same thing, and they just didn't work. You just need to have the right-minded folks at the keyboard and behind and in front of the camera, and "Lost Skeleton" has it. |
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| MANIACTS (2001)- Two serial killers meet and fall in love in an asylum. Upon escaping their corrupt captors, they flee to the country and attempt to lead a happy, normal life, but it's not easy when you've got a rocky past. Except for a sort of disappointing ending, this was a nice surprise and a great bit of entertainment. Not too violent or harrowing, but great acting and sporadic insanity make this film shine bright. Kellie Waymire is absolutely stunning in her unstable role and Jeff Fahey underplays his role well, which is a very good contrast to Kellie's. This movie has that strange, in-between-low-budget-and-medium-budget look to it that few movies have nowadays plus a goofy atmosphere that is dark at the same time. There's not much violence in the movie, but when there is, it's over-the-top, though brief: [SPOILER ALERT- highlight the next couple of lines if you're interested] a woman gets her head split open by a super high-pressure firehose and a warden gets impaled with an 8 foot flagpole through a window just to name a couple of moments. [END OF SPOILER ALERT] If you like "Bonnie & Clyde" or "Natural Born Killers" type of movies, perhaps you'll like this one, though this one is a lot more tender-hearted. |
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| PROM NIGHT 3 (1989) / PROM NIGHT 4 (1992)- The storylines for both movies are either dumb or routine, so let's get on to the actual review shall we?..... I liked part 1 and 2 a lot (part 2 is my favourite), but 3 and 4 are hardly worth renting. Why did they make the 3rd movie a comedy? That's so dumb. There is one good brief scene of a football that turns into a giant screw after its been thrown to a guy, but that's the only decent scene in the movie. For some reason, it's been heavily edited, too, even though it's the DVD release (though one gore scene is left in, for some reason, despite all the other edits). The violent scenes are so badly edited down, a scene doesn't even finish in a decent "television edit" way, plus the cussing in the movie has been dubbed. I don't know what's up with the folks that released it. Part 4 has nothing to do with Mary Lou (from parts 2 and 3) nor does it have anything to do with the first movie (except that when some teens are getting drunk, one asks who or what they should toast to, and one of 'em says "Jamie Lee Curtis"). The movie is REALLY boring, until about the last 10 minutes and it gets pretty good at that point (well, between decent and pretty good), but it's just not worth it. Stay away! |
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| RETROACTIVE (1997)- A woman accepts a ride after her car breaks down in the desert, only to witness a murder and barely escape the lunatic. During her escape into the desert, she happens upon a building where a scientist has finally succeeded in accomplishing a type of time travel. She's sent back 20 minutes into the past, and she tries to undo what occured. It doesn't have an explosive ending, but all that leads up to the ending is very entertaining. It keeps you interested until the end. I can't say more without ruining surprises, but it's a very entertaining movie. It's not just a time travel movie; it's also a very well-done action flick as well. Acting, continuity, casting and stunts are superb. It's too bad this movie is unknown (I've never seen it at any video store anywhere). I see it available for $5.88 from time to time at Food 4 Less grocery stores. Find it. A MUST SEE! |
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| ROAD RAGE (2000)- A guy accidentally cuts off a big pickup truck and is relentlessly pursued by the seriously determined driver. Movies such as "Duel" and "Night of the Hunter" come to mind while watching this one. The indentity of the truckdriver occured too soon. I could barely hear the musical score of the movie. Lotta noise going on almost constantly. I did kind of like the song played at the end credits a little bit, though. The main characters were not consistent with themselves; maybe that's due to the situation they were put in; I don't know. The explosion at the end was ridiculous; too much napalm. Great scenery. About half the chase scenes were really good. The fact that the main characters were on foot for a while was a nice change in the pacing of the movie.. Casper Van Dien did a good job with the character he was given, which wasn't much and didn't make sense all the time. All in all, I liked the movie, and recommend it despite its flaws. |
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| SLUMBER PARTY MASSACRE 2 (1987)- While spending a weekend in an uncompleted housing tract, a female bandmember is tormented by violent dreams which eventually manifest, involving a maniac wielding a deadly guitar. Rarely have I ever seen a movie so silly & stupid, yet so cool and fun to watch at the same time. I usually hate horror movies that try to be funny or wacky, but this is an exception. It’s just plain silly & unbelievable. It hardly makes any sense at all. The only scary (actually, creepy) thing about the movie is that the guy that plays the killer in it looks just like the guy who played the killer in the 1st movie, only about 15 or 20 years younger. Weird! The weapon was really cool: an elaborate, scythe-like guitar with a large drill on the end. The main characters in the movie are female band members, and I actually liked the two songs they performed quite a bit. Idiotic party crashers, pus-filled hallucinations, and a villain who forgets it’s the 80’s (not the 50’s). You really should rent it sometime and laugh your butt off. Well, not so much laugh, but wonder how the heck the writer was able to convince the producer to shell out the cash to get the movie made. The ending was disappointing and abrupt, though, unfortunately. The rest of it is hilarious. |
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| STUFF STEPHANIE IN THE INCINERATOR (1989)- Knocked out by two ugly guys, Paul wakes to find himself in the parlor of a strange mansion where he and a mysterious female prisoner attempt to escape, with no luck. Then the mansion's owner determines a revolting punishment, and that's just the beginning of a really weird movie that twists and turns in all directions possible. I don't know what to say about this movie, because the story/idea was pretty good, but the bad acting, weird cinematography (not in a good way, either), and outdated-looking characters (even for 1989, when it was made) made it a chore to sit through. The reviews I'd read of it made it sound really cool and clever, but it didn't quite live up to those reviews;however, at times, it was very smart. I can't say it doesn't have its surprises, because it has many. No nudity, cussing or gore, but it does get a little violent toward the end. If it had a more experienced director or cinematographer working on it, it would have turned out to be an awesome cult classic, but it's only mildly worth mentioning, and not really worth recommending. It's got one of the best titles I've ever seen for a movie. Check it out if you're in a weird mood. |
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| VISITORS (2003)- A woman sailing around the globe is on the last few days of her journey. Before she completes her trek, she'll have to deal with cabin fever, guilt, worries and fears, all of which manifest and visit her on the ship at different times. Reality and mentality are mingled and confused in this movie that never gets boring, for a movie with hardly any action. It has an odd type of claustrophobia to it, because it takes place on a small boat, yet its out in the ocean which is very open. Check it out if you need to get away from the usual dose of pure everyday horror. The few special effects shots in the movie are very well-done. The main character is superbly portrayed by Radha Mitchell (who also does a great job in another movie called "When Strangers Appear"), an actress I hope gets more roles. |
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