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 Just an observation...
Author: Marie-Josée (---.tvcablenet.be)
Date:   05-14-03 14:01

Hi to the Class of 81...

Well, it's been quite a ride. We are all on the verge of the big 40, thus mature adults I think. We all have chosen our personal routes in life and have gone on our own way careerwise and a personal note.

However, I don't appreciate getting mail from those who 'don't approve' of the life I have chosen. If you have nothing else better to do than to butt your nose into people's personal lives I feel so sorry for you and I am sad for you. If you are to write to me, please write something pleasant or nothing at all. Should you persist, I will personally grill your pc and that's a promise....so guys, please cool it.

I don't care if you are straight or gay or blue or have married five times or deal narcotics...whatever.....I love you for who you are and I will never judge so please do not judge me.

I have been accused of ignoring certain people and having a preference for others....excuse me but when certain people decided to contact me I was going through a rough period in my life and I had no desire to talk to anyone. Believe me it wasn't personal...I just needed to reflect on the major decisions I was faced with. How many times would former classmates confide secret confessions or hopes or desires....I never judged - I just listened and respected your right to live your lives the way you saw fit.

As for ignoring certain people - if you remember well back then, we all had different crowds...ie the brains, the jocks, the bandpeople. I got along with everybody but hung out with a certain group and there is nothing wrong with that. After graduation, we went about our business for greater education and goals and we lost contact for a few years so how dare you accuse me of selecting a certain preference of people - it is now that I realize how few of you really know me. I have faults like others but my kindness never changed for one minute.

That's all for now...just needed to clear the air. I wish you all a great life full of happiness and health, watching your children grow (some of us have kids already in or entering HIgh School). I would love to hear from any of you and when my busy schedule permits it, I will write you back and so forth.

Luv,
Marie

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 Re: Just an observation...
Author: Gayle Campbell (---.93-131-66.nowhere.mc.videotron.ca)
Date:   05-16-03 10:21

I would like to start by mentioning that Kathy, Brenda and I also had a lot help on the reunion from Carole Conte.

I find this whole thing rather childish, but I just can’t let it pass anymore. So I guess I’m as bad as you. I’ve been reading various messages on the forum and I have noticed that you answer messages from anyone and everyone and in most of them you mention how all your old high school chums have criticised and judged you.

If you were going through such a hard time and didn’t want to talk to people you shouldn’t have posted an open invitation for people to write to you; I quote “Please don’t hesitate to write to me.”

We weren’t best friends in school, but we were friends (I thought) and I did write to you, in a personal email, not a public one, asking how things were going. I specifically remember telling you that, although I didn’t understand why you did what you did, I couldn’t judge you because I don’t know what came before. Instead of being happy to hear from me or being pleased that I was thinking of you, you blasted me right out of the water and judged me because I had the nerve to say I didn’t understand.

You have to grow up and decide what you want and if you continue to post these public messages, and ask people to contact you, you have to be able to handle the responses, both positive and negative. If you want people to stop judging and asking questions stop trickling out bits and pieces of information and either tell the whole story or say nothing at all!

That's just my opinion, like it or not.

Gayle

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 Re: Just an observation...
Author: ex-1981 (---.74-202-24.mtl.mc.videotron.ca)
Date:   05-16-03 12:46

I'll put in my 2cents.

Marie, you spend too much time in many of your posts in this forum saying how you have been judged, don't like how people are treating you.
Have you thought about simply filtering those people out of your email program? It's a very simple solution.

I don't know what's gone on in your life that's causing the negative feedback you speak of, and to be blunt: we all have baggage. But you seem to be the only one waving it around in many of your posts.

I'll add to Gayle's answer and say: don't post the story in here. It's entirely inappropriate.

For those to whom you have provided the details: if you can't be supportive, then say nothing. If you don't want to know the details, don't get involved. We're all staring down the dark side of 40 and behaving like 14 yr olds with nothing better than gossip to occupy our time is foolishness.

I've spent a fair amount of time reading through people's updates, this message board. It's nice to know that people seem to be reasonably happy. They've developed educations, careers, marriages, children. But they're not waving their problems everywhere. Keep it one on one. As Gayle pointed out, you're inviting more problems by how you're dealing with it.

So how about people take a deep breath, and try to remember what's important in life.

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 Re: Just an observation...
Author: Tania Fell (---.mediagrif.com)
Date:   05-16-03 13:40

Marie,

Maybe you should stop reflecting on your past, and concentrate on your future.

Hopefully you're finished airing your dirty laundry on the Phorum. If you're so p*ssed off at people, stop contacting them.....simple as that. Maybe try putting something positive in here....you'll see more postive than negative feedback from others.

T

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 Re: Just an observation...
Author: Marie-Josée (---.tvcablenet.be)
Date:   05-19-03 14:07

Tania - I don't know you and you don't know me so please......I don't have to spell it....what's this about dirty laundry????????????

Did I name people in particular? I think I was quite polite...but if you prefer I can starting naming names no problem but I don't want to....

If you don't like the comments I write than don't read them.

As for Gayle...well, what can I say

And to the anonymous writer on videotron.ca....ditto.

My various replies on the forums were regarding a possible farewell party, a hello to Elaine Beauchamp and replies in French to a Sophie Huet is very nice...

If you have a problem with that, too bad....

I have a problem with getting nonsense mail on my personal addy and I just wanted to make things clear.

I do not care if you approve or not - don't read if you don't like.

Sorry

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 Re: Just an observation...
Author: Marie-Josée (---.tvcablenet.be)
Date:   05-19-03 14:13

Gayle,

YOu say you want to know nothing or all....why are you so curious?

Stop meddling in my life for Godsake! You are the one who started sending me e-mails and after the second I didn't reply because I just didn't want to.

Take care of your lives, your loved ones, your careers and your health - these things are so vitally important.

You have the right to your opinion - do you feel better now? Good for you.
Trust me, I wish you nothing but success and happiness in your new life.

Okay - I will keep my new life private - that is not a problem, but no one will stop me from saying hello or discussing the weather on a forum....

I don't think I personnally attacked anybody by name - I just needed to make things clear...

Talking about inappropriate - isn't it funny that some permit to write to me butting into my business - is that appropriate?

If I hurt anybody - I am truly sorry....I never meant to...

Well, on a light note, I have spaghetti to prepare for dinner but I don't want to give all the details here....

Luv you guys anyways....grrrrrr :-)
Marie

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 Re: Just an observation...
Author: Gayle Campbell (---.qc.sympatico.ca)
Date:   05-19-03 18:52



I'm sorry I even bothered to write to ask how things were going. I had simply heard your name mentioned and thought I'd write to see how things were going. I didn't think it would be considered meddling, seeing as you had asked people to feel free to contact you.

As for my earlier response, I was just answering the message you posted, as did the other two people, whoever they may be.

I guess it was a mistake to even bother. I won't do it again.

I, too, wish you the best.

Gayle

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 Re: Just an observation...
Author: Tania Fell (---.mediagrif.com)
Date:   05-20-03 13:29

MJ:

You're right, we don't know each other. "Airing dirty laundry" is an expression. Litterally everything that you write in here is all negative things......forget the past!!! Try living for the future, and let whatever happened in your past GO!!! You might be surprised by the outcome.

I'm not dissing you here, as I have no reason to ........just passing comments, that's all!! Most of your messages come across as very negative, with an underlying message that would almost sound like:..."leave me alone", sort of thing. It's almost like you're inviting people to e-mail you, attacking everything that you've written. Try going back and re-reading the posts that you've put in here. They all have negativity written about them. The only time that I sense when you're happy is when you speak of your children, and coming back to Montreal. Keep that positivity going MJ, and I'm certain that you'll be able to re-connect with some of your old friends.

Let me know what happens!!

Take care

T

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