The scene opens 200 feet above the River Tees on top of the elevated walkway of the world’s largest Transporting Bridge appropriately named The Transporter Bridge, which for everyone who doesn’t know is right in the heart of Middlesbrough. From the top of the bridge we can see the beautiful Cleveland Hills and North York Moors, we can also see The Riverside Stadium some 200 feet below the bridge. When the camera turns around we can also see Sabre, Magenta and Josh Landers who are all standing on the walkway. Sabre and Magenta seem to be enjoying the fine view but Josh looks as though he is quite scared. Out of the corner of his eye Sabre sees Josh’s terrified face he then turns around to talk to him.

Sabre: What the hell is wrong with you Josh, you’re up here standing on a marvel on early twentieth century engineering and you’re looking out at a great view of god’s own country so what’s your problem.

Josh Landers: Sorry Sabre but I’m scared of heights.

Sabre now notices that Josh’s knees are knocking together.

Sabre: My god what a wimp.

Josh Landers: I’m no wimp, I just don’t like it this high up.

Magenta now joins in the debate.

Magenta: Landers, you’re standing in the middle of a fifteen foot wide walkway and on the side of the walkway there are steel barriers, so there’s no way you can fall over the side into the river 200 feet below. So if your aren’t being a wimp I’d like to know what you are.

Josh Landers: I can’t help it if I’ve got a phobia.

Sabre: Of course you can Josh, for starters you can pull yourself together and start acting like a man, and then for seconds you can have a look over the side and see that there is nothing to fear.

Josh Landers: I’d rather not I’m happy here.

Sabre ignores what Josh says and grabs his arm, he then brings him close to the barriers at the side of the walkway and makes him look over the side. Josh looks even more terrified now but Sabre makes him look over the side for just a bit longer. He then lets him go as soon as he does Josh runs back to the middle of the walkway as quickly as he can.

Sabre: See that didn’t hurt you did it.

Josh Landers: Yes it did actually I thought for a second when I was looking over the edge that I was going to die.

Sabre: Bloody Hell, what a wimp.

Josh Landers: Well I’d rather be a wimp than falling to my death towards that river. Anyway before you go on any longer about my physical prowess can I ask you why you brought me all the way up here to the top of this bridge?

Sabre: Simple Josh, it is the best place I could think of for showing you a complete view of Middlesbrough which just happens to be the greatest city in the world.

Josh Landers: That’s very nice of you, but couldn’t you have got Brian Wilson or Lisa Blunt up here instead of me, or if they weren’t available any one who didn’t mind heights.

Sabre: No Josh I had to pick you, because I’m not having a tramp like Lisa Blunt set foot in my home city. Middlesbrough women are all classy beautiful ladies like Magenta so it would be a travesty to have a skank like Lisa polluting this fabulous place, and as for Brian Wilson, he such a dick isn’t he. If I was up here with him within five seconds he’d say something idiotic and I’d have to throw him off the bridge, and I wouldn’t want to get in trouble over someone as insignificant like him, so with them not being allowed up here that just leaves you doesn’t it.

Josh Landers: (Gulps) I suppose so. Okay now that I’m up what exactly did you want to show me.

Sabre: The beautiful countryside around Middlesbrough, the Middlesbrough Coast, and some of the landmarks of the town.

Josh Landers: Yes they’re very nice, can we go down now.

Sabre: No we can’t, because you haven’t had a proper look yet at all the beautiful scenery.

Josh has a look around, looking petrified as he does so.

Josh Landers: The views okay I suppose, but it’s no better than anywhere else.

Sabre: What are you talking about man, Middlesbrough is the cultural centre of the Universe, it has so much to see and do, so I’ll have no one saying that it’s anything other than outstanding.

Sabre looks at Josh in a threatening manner.

Josh Landers: Er, okay it’s an outstanding view. In fact it’s probably the nicest I’ve ever seen.

Sabre: Really Josh, you think my home town is that good. Well I’m glad you like it, and since you like it so much I’ll show you some of the best bits.

Josh Landers: If you insist

Sabre: Oh I do Josh.

Sabre starts pointing at various things in the foreground and background.

Sabre: Firstly we have the lovely scenery, over there we have the North York Moors, then there’s the Cleveland Hills over there, and you can’t forget the Eston Hills can you.

Josh Landers: I don’t think anyone could forget them.

Sabre: And to the east we have the Middlesbrough Coastline, beautiful isn’t it. If it wasn’t December then surely a dip in those perfect blue waters would be just too much of a temptation to resist.

Josh Landers: If only it was July or August.

Sabre: Okay that’s enough of the perfect city backdrop. Now let’s have a look at some of the man made objects. Firstly almost directly below us in the stadium in which I will be competing this Monday against Sweet Jeff Strife. It’s a magnificent stadium isn’t it, easily the best in the country in my opinion, and thanks to my awesome wresting ability and because everyone loves me so much the venue will be totally packed out.

Josh Landers: I don’t know OCW V2 has yet to have a full house anywhere in the world.

Sabre: Well it will this Monday because just like last time I wrestled here all tickets will have sold out in advance. You see last time I wrestled here Josh, I had 35,000 fans shouting my name as I and Dark Angel beat The Mysterious Shadow and Master to win the WWWP tag team titles, and I see no reason why it should be any different this time. Everyone in this town worships me so they will all be dying to see me in action again. One thing I would like to know though is why my match isn’t the main event. I’ll be the one selling out this venue not Jakkob McKain or Brother Rob so I should take pride of place on the card. Once again a lack of respect is shown to me by Paul Middle, but I digress from what I came up to show you, and I wouldn’t want to do that would I. Okay I’ve showed you the stadium next I’ll show that bridge over there.

Sabre turns Josh’s attention to a large bridge just down the river from where they’re standing now.

Sabre: That’s the Newport Bridge Josh, it’s the tallest working lifting bridge in the world and it’s yet another marvel or early twentieth century engineering. Middlesbrough is just full of marvel isn’t it.

Josh Landers: I guess so.

Sabre: Next that large gothic building slap bang in the middle of the town centre. That’s the Town Hall, and in my opinion it’s the finest example of gothic architecture in the UK.

Josh Landers: What about Westminster Abbey.

Sabre: No that doesn’t even compare to Middlesbrough Town Hall. Okay you’ve seen the town hall, next if you look to the south west, you’ll see a large sandstone building in the middle of a large expanse of park land.

Josh Landers: No I don’t think I can see that.

Sabre: It’s over there you jackass.

Sabre points at the building he was referring and makes sure Josh has a good look at it.

Sabre: That’s the Captain Cook Birth Place Museum. A museum dedicated to Middlesbrough’s second most famous son Captain James Cook. In case you didn’t know he discovered Australia. So it’s thanks to him that I had to wrestle in that awful country last week, but never the less he’s still an important Historical figure and that’s his museum. People come from all round the world to see it, but I’ll tell you what when I retire from wrestling, the Sabre museum will be three times as big as that one and it will five times as many visitors. Because in my museum there will so much to see because I’ve achieved so much and I will go on to achieve even greater things.

Josh Landers: I can’t wait to see it Sabre, will there be any references to me in it.

Sabre: No of course not, you’ve never done anything note worthy in your life and you never will. Okay next I’ll show you where I live when I’m staying in my hometown.

Sabre points to a very large house set in some rather fine gardens which can just be made out in the distance.

Sabre: There’s my humble abode, all 75 rooms of it. It is truly a great house, it has two swimming pools, 6 tennis courts, a garage with 15 cars inside, the best gardens in the country as well as having every luxury you could want contained within it’s four walls.

Josh Landers: Why don’t you invite all the OCW staff around then and have some sort of party.

Sabre: You’ve got to joking I’m not having an of those unclean morons in my house, they would wreck the place with their uncivilised ways.

Josh Landers: Well can’t I come alone then and make use of some of the facilities of your house.

Sabre: No way you’re the most uncivilised of the lot. If you even set one foot in my house it wouldn’t be the same place again.

Magenta: And I very much doubt that we would ever get the place clean again in Josh was allowed in. No matter how many cleaners we hired.

Sabre: Good point Magenta, Josh does have a well deserved reputation for been filthy, so filthy that he would permanently damage all the fine works of art that I have in my house. So Josh I guess you’re not welcome, anyway that’s enough about my not so humble home, let’s get back to the important business of showing you all the sites of the town.

Over the next twenty minutes Sabre and Magenta proceed to show Josh all the various sites of the town, such as the Old Town Hall, The Cathedral, The Dorman Museum, The Middlesbrough Art Gallery, Albert Park, The Cenotaph, Roseberry Topping and many more exciting things.

Sabre: See I told you there was so much to see and do Josh.

Josh Landers: Yes that was very interesting and informative, but can we go now I think I’m going to vomit at any time because of the height.

Sabre: Not yet Josh, because you see I haven’t done an interview since I returned to OCW and since lots of exciting activity has gone down over the last few weeks and more exciting things are coming up soon for me I thought it was about time I gave one, and since you’re an OCW interviewer and you just happen to be in the area I thought you should conduct it.

Josh Landers: But I haven’t done any preparation so I don’t know what questions to ask you.

Sabre: Surely you must have some journalistic ability Josh.

Josh Landers: Yes I do I’ve got a degree in journalism and I’ve worked in TV for a number of years now so I know my stuff.

Sabre: So you should be able to think on your feet then and ask me questions about last weeks match, my upcoming match with Jeff Strife and my match at the pay per view against Joey ‘The Devastator’ Jackson.

Josh Landers: Well I suppose I could play it by ear, but off the cuff interviews are never as good as planned ones.

Sabre: I’m sure you’ll give it your best shot.

Josh Landers: Okay then I’ll try, okay firstly we’ll go back to the last edition of Blast, you had a handicap match with Chris O’Hann and Joe Jackson, and after a long struggle somehow you managed to come out on top, how do you feel about that win.

Sabre: Well quite frankly I’m disappointed by my performance in that match.

Josh Landers: I don’t see how you can be disappointed though, you overcame the odds and beat two top guys in a handicap match, and in the process of doing so you pinned the man who you’ll be facing at Die Another Day for the Aggression title thus giving you an important psychological advantage going into that match. That’s pretty impressive if you ask me, and something you should be proud of.

Sabre: Well I’m not proud of my performance, and the reason for that is that I should have beat two mediocre wrestlers like Chris O’Hann and Joey Jackson much more quickly than I did. I should be putting away guys like that in under five minutes, but last Monday I must have been having an off day because it took me a lot longer than to pick up the win.

Josh Landers: But the way you came back from the 2 on 1 beat down they giving you was great.

Sabre: Of course it was great after all we are talking about The Ultimate Fighting Machine here, and everything I do is great, and when it comes to taking abuse my recuperative powers are second only to Bobby Ewing out of Dallas so it goes come as no surprise that I can take a licking and keep on ticking, but against paragons of weakness like Messers O’Hann and Jackson I shouldn’t even be in a position where I have to use my recuperative powers. As I should be beating them without being on the receiving end of a single offensive move. So that was another disappointing aspect of my performance and one I must improve upon, but I assure you next time I face Joey Jackson or O’Hann I will have learnt from those mistakes and I will make sure they lose in double quick time.

Josh Landers: So at Die Another Day you’ll be making sure you beat Joey quickly then?

Sabre: Of course I’ll be making sure I beat him quickly, after all I hate being near that guy so the sooner I beat him the faster I can get away from his odious presence. And personally I think I’ll have no problems beating him quickly because in our match at Die Another Day he’ll have no back up and we all saw how quickly I beat him on Monday once he’d lost his backup. I think about a minute was all it took, and I’m sure in a one on one match I’ll beat him just as quickly again. And perhaps with some of the stuff I’ve been working on over the last month stuff which I have yet to debut perhaps the match will last even less than a minute.

Josh Landers: It also has to be said that after your match both you and Magenta looked like you needed some medical attention, baring that in mind are you both okay now.

Sabre: Of course I’m okay Josh, it will take far more than Joey Jackson and Chris O’Hann to take me out of action. In fact I doubt the whole OCW roster could put me out of action because I’m just way too tough and too resilient. I’ve never had a serious injury in my wrestling career and with my resiliency I doubt I ever will and I was to get injured it would take more than a few shots from Joey to do it.

Josh Landers: How about you Magenta, you looked in an even worse state than Sabre after the match

Magenta: I’m okay too, I’m not some wimpy girl like Stacey Keibler who gets injured after one punch. I can withstand as much pain as most wrestlers out there male and female, and after all I was the EHCW Television and Tag Team champion so I’ve got the evidence to back up that statement. So it’s going to take way more than a sabrecrusher from Joey to stop me from managing Sabre to another victory this week and to winning the Aggression Title at Die Another Day.

Josh Landers: Aren’t you worried though that at Die Another Day Joe Jackson could be out to get revenge on you and he could do something very nasty indeed to either or both of you.

Sabre: Josh I’m never worried about Joey Jackson, because I personally believe that he just does not posses the ability or the power to do me or Magenta any serious harm at all. In fact the only thing I think will be within his powers after facing me at Die Another Day will be the ability to drink his food through a straw. Because when I’m through with Joey he will be so busted up that not only will his career as a wrestler be over so will his life outside a hospital bed.

Josh Landers: Strong words indeed, but we’ll have to wait until the pay per view to see if you can back them up, but before the Pay Per View you’ve got a match this week on Blast against Sweet Jeff Strife. So far in his OCW career Jeff is unbeaten so he’s definitely not someone you can overlook as you get ready for your title shot.

Sabre: There’s no need to worry Landers, this week my mind will completely focus on Mr Strife, and because of that I think I will pick up yet another win. Now Jeff Strife is unbeaten so far in OCW, but that doesn’t bother me at all because the level of competition he’s been up against has been so poor that even my grandmother would be unbeaten if she’d have faced the same opponents. So the fact that he’s unbeaten is irrelevant because you can be rest assured that after seeing his poor performances over the last three weeks, I know that if he’d faced anyone even half way decent he would not have that perfect record, and if he had been up against a world class competitor like myself, he would probably be out of action with a seriously nasty injury. You see Josh I’ve seen nothing in Jeff’s performances so far that has me even slightly worried about him. His moves even his best ones seem to lack the kind of impact required to have any real effect on me, and his strength and conditioning are also very suspect and I could exploit those deficiencies quite easily and pick up a quick win.

Josh Landers: He’s looked pretty damn good to me, and I think he could well surprise you especially if Hyper Viper gets involved in the match.

Sabre: There’s no chance that he will surprise me I’m just to prepared for anything that he might throw at me, plus I simply refuse to lose in front of my home town fans so a loss is completely out of the question. As for Hyper Viper he can interfere if he wants to but it will do Jeff Strife no good at all as I have already proved that I can deal with two men at the same time, so no matter what he does I’ll be able to handle it and still pick up the win. Anyway with Magenta backing me up anything he tries to do will be returned on him ten fold, so he probably won’t dare stick his nose into my business, but if he does he will get his ass handed to him as Magenta is dying to get her hands on somebody as she’s yet to have a match here so she’s desperate for a bit of wrestling action.

Josh Landers: Well if that happens I’m sure it will be an interesting tussle, okay have you got any final words for Jeff.

Sabre: Yes I do, Jeff on the last edition you refused to wrestle Mark Dark because you said he wasn’t on your level, well Jeff you’re not on my level but unluckily for you I will be wrestling you because I enjoy nothing more than beating up on punks like you and ruining their dreams of becoming the champ. And believe me Jeff when you come up against me you’re chances of becoming champ will be ruined because once I’ve totally sabreized you, and shown everyone how weak you are, your chances of getting a title shot will be non existence, and your so called career will be over before it even begun.

Josh Landers: Okay I think that wraps it up, and I’ve got to say for someone who didn’t do any preparation I thought I did a good job.

Sabre: No it was merely adequate, next time you must do better.

Josh Landers: I’ll try, anyway can we go now I’m starting to feel quite nauseous now.

Sabre: No not yet, I’ve just thought of a few more things I can show you so you’ll have to enjoy another guided tour of the town before I dismiss you.

Josh Landers: Gee thanks, I can hardly wait.

Sabre now beings to show Josh some more of the sights of Middlesbrough but as he does so the scene fades to black.