VanillaMint: I'm bad at giving titles-__-; please send me some comments!*beg beg beg*

...dedicated to all Die and Shinya fans...

+DieXShinya+

His feet thumped against the floor as he ascended the flight of stairs. Shinya trudged heavily, lugging the extra 60kg of weight behind him. It was dark, making him hard to see the steps. Finally he reached the second floor. He dropped the unconscious man on the floor and dragged him to the room.

" Fuck you, Die! Next time I’ll let you sleep on the streets!" the drummer fumed, running the comb past the tangles of his hair. His eyes stung slightly and he was more than a little tipsy after the drinking session with his bandmates and friends.

Die had pulled himself to a sitting position on the carpet, looking very drunk with his hair messed up and that look of blur annoyance on his face. His young lover ignored him as he walked into the bathroom.

Shinya pried his eyes open and removed his lenses; the world suddenly blurring before him. As he brushed his teeth, he noticed the red-haired guitarist leaning against the entrance of the bathroom, looking at him in a weird way. In fact, lately Die had been looking at him with that ‘light’ in his eyes mad Shinya’s skin crawl. It was as if Die was trying to…trying to undress him with his eyes.

" What??" the drummer asked after emptying his mouth of water.

" You’re so beautiful, Shin-chan…"

Shinya rolled his eyes and pushed his way past Die to his cupboard.

" You know where’s the extra blanket, right? It’s in the bottom most drawer of the bedside table. I just sent it to the laundry; it should be clean," Shinya told Die as he slid into an oversized shirt.

But Die didn’t go get the blanket, instead he wrapped his arms around Shinya, pressing his chest to his back. "And where am I going to sleep?"

The younger man tried to squirm out of his hold. "On the couch where you always do. Where else???"

Shinya gasped when Die gently brushed his lips against the skin of his neck. "On the couch?"

" Y-yes."

" But you know what I want, don’t you?" Die asked huskily, breathing into his left ear. He poked his tongue out, licking the curve of Shinya’s earlobe, making him shudder.

" Die, you’re drunk!" Shinya laughed uncomfortably, his heart beating a thousand miles per hour.

" Yes, I am."

Suddenly, Shinya found himself lying horizontally on the bed, crumpling the orange floral sheets as he attempted to escape from Die. The older man trapped him under his body, pinning his legs down with his own more muscular ones.

" Die! Get off!" He started to protest but his words were soon silenced by Die’s lips. He struggled to push the man off in vain as a tongue invaded his mouth. Hungrily yet passionately Die kissed him, holding his hands captive at the sides.

Shinya’s delicate body seemed frail beneath his. Confident that Shinya had not enough strength or willpower to hurt him, Die released his hands so that he could feel Shinya’s body with his hands. He heard the man gasp when his fingers sneaked under his shirt to touch the smooth skin underneath.

" Stop…stop..!" Shinya whimpered even as Die caught a nipple between his thumb and index finger, stroking it until it hardened.

" Shinya, Shinya…" Die chanted as he smothered the drummer’s neck and face with wet kisses.

" No…I don’t want…ah!" His eyes widened in shock when the older man pressed his own length against his. Even through the cloth, Shinya felt the size and hardness of Die’s manhood. His breath raced and he panicked.

" Shh…" Die cooed. Gently, he slid a hand between their bodies and massaged Shinya through the front of his shorts. Unwillingly, the younger man closed his eyes and little moans escaped his parted lips before Die covered those lips with his own.

But when Die slipped his hand under the waistband, Shinya jerked and clamped his teeth down on Die’s lips. Crying out, Die pulled back, two fingers bracing his bleeding lip. Fury burned in his eyes. Shinya didn’t even realise Die had slapped him until he felt the ringing pain on his cheek.

" Bite me?!"

Shinya cried out as Die pulled him by his hair and propped him against the headboard roughly. His lips made brutal contact with the drummer’s skin, bruising it. It tasted like Shinya; it was Shinya. But his tongue caught the salty moisture running down the smooth cheeks. Shinya was crying, begging him to stop. Die didn’t want to stop; he wanted Shinya too much…yet he didn’t want Shinya to cry.

Growling, he detached himself from Shinya. Containing his overflowing desire, he got off the bed and out of the room. The door shut with a loud slam, leaving Shinya alone on the bed, still with tears in his eyes.

With trembling fingers, he clutched a pillow close to himself and buried his face in its softness. One part of him wanted to go out there and submit to Die. What if Die felt that he could not fulfil his sexual needs and leave him? What would he do then?

Another part told him to stay put. He was not ready yet to go to bed with Die. Sure, what could possibly go wrong? He could not ‘accidentally’ get pregnant. But the idea of letting another man take him was a bit uncomfortable…

Shinya wiped off his tears with the back of his hand, thinking.

But the ‘another man’ was Die…

Through tear-blurred view, he gazed at the ring on his left hand. Die had gave it to him as a proposal ring.

If it was Die, then…

He tossed the pillow and the blanket aside and rose from the bed.

***

Outside in the hall, Die sat on the sofa, staring morosely at the blank TV screen.

What the hell do you think you’re doing?! First, you tried to rape Shinya then you hit him! He is going to hate you for this!

Feeling tears creep into his eyes, he covered them with his palms, letting the darkness darken into blackness.

I didn’t mean to harm him…I only wanted to have Shinya. I…I never wanted to hurt him! Please don’t let Shinya hate me! Please…Shinya…

***

His footsteps echoed in the silence although the corridor was only a short distance.

" Die?"

No answer. Had he left? Shinya bit his lips and frowned.

" Die??"

In the dark, he managed to make out the outline of the guitarist against the illumination of the moon in the hall. Quietly, he walked over to the other man and took a seat next to him.

" Die…?" A worried look pasted itself on Shinya’s face. He couldn’t see Die’s hidden face.

" I’m sorry, Shinya…I’m sorry," he whispered, his voice cracking, betraying him.

The drummer saw his tear-stained face as he peeled away Die’s hands and held them in his own smaller ones.

" It’s okay, Die…don’t cry, I’m not angry," he soothed the older man and wiped the tears off with his fingers. He held Die’s head to his chest, stroking his long hair like a mother would do to her child.

Die encircled Shinya’s slim waist with his long arms, burying his face into his chest to inhale the scent. Shinya smelt of soap as if he had just came out from the bath; so clean and pure. He berated himself for trying to force himself on Shinya who was still so untainted, so innocent.

" Die?"

" Hm…?"

Shinya bit his lips as he hesitated. " Die, make love to me?" he whispered softly, gently combing his fingers through the crimson strands.

" What?" Die whispered back. He must be dreaming….he thought he heard Shinya say…

" Will you…make love to me?" Shinya’s face burnt as red as Die’s hair in the dark. He looked down, still chewing on his lower lip.

Die’s hands tightened around Shinya’s. "I will but…" he stopped, holding Shinya’s chin in his hand so that he could see the man’s eyes. "…I don’t want to hurt you."

The younger man shook his head. He touched Die’s cheek gently and placed a kiss on his lips.

" Shinya…"

" Die, it’s okay…" Shinya assured him though his own heart beat with irregular pace.

Die smiled and gathered Shinya’s body in his arms and carried him to the bedroom. He laid him down gently on the mattress, kissing the back of his hand before climbing onto the bed, above Shinya. He gazed at the beautiful face staring up at his, absorbing in how those innocent eyes sucked him in, how those parted lips make him want to kiss them, how the smooth flawless skin invited him for a touch…

Die bent down, gently claiming Shinya’s lips as he tried not to crush the young man with his weight. One hand played with the strands of Shinya’s hair while the other glided over his stomach, making Shinya tremble with a mix of excitement and fear.

Shinya’s eyes fluttered shut as he tried not to protest as Die’s hand slid under the waistband to touch him. He felt hot tears stinging his eyes but he didn’t know why.

Suddenly Die pulled away.

Shinya opened his eyes. "Die?"

Die settled himself beside Shinya, sitting cross-legged as he smiled at the drummer. " I’m sorry…"

" What?" Shinya got up and looked at Die questioningly. He doesn’t want me? Is he angry at me for resisting him at first?

" Are you scared?"

" I…" Shinya averted his eyes, wiping off the tears hanging from his long lashes. "…a little."

Die sighed and he embraced Shinya in a hug. Shinya didn’t know if he was touched or sad or happy coz he started to cry. He tried to cease his tears without much success as they sprang from his eyes like water from a fountain. He buried himself in Die’s arms, pressing his face against his chest.

" What’s wrong? Shh, please don’t cry…tell me what’s wrong," Die stroked his back tenderly.

Shinya’s sobs subsided a little. " You don’t want me?" his voice was small and cracked from his crying.

" Of course I want you! I would always want you!"

" But I…" Shinya paused. "…I’ve never done it before; I…"

" Shin-chan, trust me! It’s okay-I can wait till you’re ready for me," Die said, holding Shinya’s face in his palms. "I’m sorry for what I did just now…I even hit you. Will you forgive me?"

Shinya smiled even though his tears haven’t dried and nodded.

" I love you, Shinya…" he whispered.

" I love you too," Shinya hugged the older man.

They stayed like that for a long while until Shinya pulled away.

" Let’s sleep ne?"

" Nn, I’m tired too…" Die rubbed his sore eyes. "Shinya?"

" Hm?" Shinya was bent over the edge of the bed, digging out a blanket for Die.

" Can I sleep with you?"

Shinya shot up, clutching his shirt protectively. "What?!"

Die laughed as he moved nearer to the young man. "I mean, -sleep- with you…I promise I won’t do anything but sleep."

Shinya blushed and pushed him away. Die heard him mumble something but he couldn’t hear because Shinya was looking in another direction.

" What?"

" I said ‘there’s only one pillow’," Shinya turned around, his cheeks pinked.

Die shrugged, "Then I guess we have to share…" He plopped himself on the single pillow and pulled Shinya into his arms.

" Who said I wanted to share with you?" Shinya tried to sound cross but ended up giggling as he pretended to push Die away.

Die pouted. "But there’s only -one- pillow!"

"There’s another in the store," the drummer stated.

" Are you going to take it?"

" Do you want me to take it?"

" Do you want to take it?" Die brushed his fingers along Shinya’s exposed arm.

Shinya blushed as he shook his head, resting it next to Die’s on the pillow. Their faces were so near he could feel Die’s breathing on his cheeks. Their eyes met and Shinya felt his heart throb uncontrollably. Die inched closer to Shinya until their lips touched lightly and he took the initiative to press their lips together. Shinya submitted to the kiss.

" Goodnight, Shin-chan," Die said.

" Goodnight."