17/10/03

It’s been a week. I’ll say that. Sunday night I went too bed with a bit of a headache, just a mild throbbing pain which I was pretty sure would be gone by the morning. Unfortunately I was horribly wrong. When I got up Monday morning my brain was in full gear, trying to escape my skull using the new pile driver it had purchased. I can’t remember having a headache quite like this one, it really was something. Of course being the stubborn prick I am (mind you I am grateful I did in hindsight), I stumbled into class and managed to get through without too many problems, many thanks to my well-trained poker face. Back home and pretty much slept until it was time to hit the evening class. By this time my brain had trained it’s individual parts all to use different heavy machinery to try and break free. I’m not sure of all the tools, but I definitely know the pile driver had been joined by a wrecking ball. I was in quite a bit of discomfort, feeling sick, and aching.

For the evening class I actually struggled to make it up the stairs to the classroom, but once I was propped up against the wall on my stool, things went okay. The two cups of ice I held constantly to my temples, while amusing the students, made things a lot easier. At the end of class Les walked up to me and said something along the lines of “you look like shit”. I confirmed his initial opinion, and made my way home. He did tell me not to show up the next morning if I wasn’t good, not to bother calling, that he’d check whether I was there or not, which was great. It was around this time I was beginning to think there was actually something wrong. I got back to the apartment block and made it up three flights before slumping against the wall for ten minutes, hoping that no one would pass by while I was in the state I was in. Thankfully I made it upstairs and died on my bed, fully-dressed. I woke at 3am, and not much had changed. After turning of my alarm, I went back to bed.

A good plan, is normally just that, a good plan. At 9am the phone rang. It was Frieda, she had come to observe our classes, walked into my classroom after the break to find my class sitting there with no teacher. Obviously something had gone wrong with Les’ plan. Frieda wasn’t annoyed, but she was definitely a little confused/disappointed, and I was pretty angry. The first time anyone had shown up to observe a class, and I had apparently decided not to come. Thankfully however Frieda is a doctor, and after listening to me run over my symptoms, she had some Chinese medicine delivered. It was around this time that I was beginning to notice itchy red spots all over the place, and a result was beginning to get a little worried. I was supposed to be having a medical examination for my visa on Tuesday, that got cancelled, and replaced with a trip to the hospital on Wednesday.

I have yet to know what was actually wrong with me, I’m almost positive I had some kind of aneurysm in my head, or even a fractured skull, and the spots were definitely small pox, if not the beginnings of Ebola. What I have discovered however, is that Chinese medicine works like nothing I have ever seen before. I started throwing down these vials of brown liquid which tasted a lot like something I really didn’t like on Tuesday afternoon. By Tuesday night I had performed a complete turnaround. I was ready to run the 10 O’clock marathon (if there was such a thing.... there wasn’t). I did teach my evening class but, which was pretty tiring.

Wednesday morning I taught and then it was off to the hospital with Maggie and Mr. Hu (the medical college’s foreign affairs guy). I went to one of the local joints, and was pretty impressed. It wasn’t the cleanest place, there were people smoking, and the odd bit of spit on the floor, which lead me to believe a majority of people I know would have turned up their noses, but the treatment was fantastic. I was whisked in, thanks to being a teacher at the medical college, examined, given medicine and out in about 30 minutes. I have no idea what they figured was wrong with me as apart from the odd question they asked, all the dialogue was in Chinese. I was given a stack of medicine however and sent on my way. I hadn’t been to a doctor because of illness in about 6 years, but if there was a way to do it, this was it.

The headache had returned in a milder form by Wednesday, but has gone now, and my polka dots have just about gone. Thankfully I only missed one class, which has put me out of whack as it is. It turned out on Tuesday morning Les had asked one of my students if I was there, they had said yes (probably not understanding the question), and he had gone back into his classroom. I think things with the brass have been smoothed over. I got paid on Thursday so doesn’t seem like there are any major problems.

The last couple of days have been catch-up days. After picking up my pay I went and spent a couple of hundred RMB on DVD’s picked up about 15, all good quality, my previously formed theory passed with flying colours. I had my medical examination this morning, which was good fun. It’s basically a physical checkup, however they have 8 different doctors all do separate things at separate times in separate places. First one measured my height and weight, then another gave me what I think was an EKG. I had clamps and wires attached everywhere, all very exciting, I was waiting for the extreme electrical shock. I was disappointed. Anyhow, another doctor then checked my blood pressure and eyesight, followed by yet another one taking a blood test (to check for HIV.... fingers crossed). To finish things off I had a chest X – Ray. All fairly comprehensive, and had me running round the quarantine center like a headless chicken. It was a little disconcerting to see lots of open vials of blood in front of me as they took my sample, things aren’t done quite the same way here!

I’ve spent the afternoon doing a bit of cleaning, and getting flights booked for Guangzhou next weekend. Dad is going to be there so we figured I’d fly down. For all those who might remember a little issue earlier this year called SARS, Guangzhou was where it all started. It’s the capital of Guangdong. Anyway, time to do a little last minute lesson planning, then off to school.

Just a quick revisal on my culture shock rant. I don’t have anything against people who have trouble adjusting, my problem is with people who move overseas with the idea that they can live exactly the same way they had lived at home. In my mind those kind of people fit the definition of ‘Idiot’.

Cheers,

Sam