| How my site got started When I was around 12 years old, my sister created a website for a class, or something. I thought it was cool. It started off with an animation of a dragon breathing smoke. It took a few minutes to load, so most of the time I didn't stick around to see it finish. Under it it said something like, "If you wish to enter [Trixie's] realm you must first face the guardian, You clicked on it, and got in. I often wondered if it ever denied anyone entry. That made me want to make my own site. Originally I had planned to create a personal website like my sister. Now I despise those sites (except Skids' because his is so much more). They're all the same. "Hi my name is some doofus, my hobbies include whateverm, here are some photos of my goldfish, please don't leave, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD I NEED SOME HITS!!!" I hate those sites. But I was still young and untraumatized, so I didn't have any of the material I do now. At first I just didn't know how to go about creating a something like a website. I didn't know about things like Geocities. Over the years the idea was raised and dropped over and over again. One day I asked Skids about his site. He introduced me to the fine people at Geocities. Upon finding it was free I asked permission from my father. I can't do anything like this on the computer wihtout his approval. I was still thinking about the personal site. He told me that his philosophy with the web was to reveak as little information about yourself as possible. My website was put on hold once more. I was beginning to think I would never get my site it the air when I stumbled upon a book in my school's library. It was called The Encyclopedia of Aggravation. There were ninety-something common annoyances. "Only 90!" I thought, "I can come up with more than that." So began my list. I made a list that almost doubled that of the book. It would have been longer, but I accidentally threw away my original list. Right then and there my one desire was to elaborate on each item and share my list with the world. But how? A website! I now had a way to make my site without personal info. But I needed more. I began adding things. I eventually came up with the things that made up the original vision for my site: annoyances, thoughts, quotes, my story (the joys section came after I began building it). That was my original plan. Now it needed a name. I took time out of my exhaustingly busy schedule to think up anagrams. Okay, so I didn't have a schedule. I came up with CRAP (Critical Reviews About People), STUFF (Serious Thoughts Underlining Ficticious Facts), and WHAT (Where Hard Analysis Takes a hike). I didn't feel real strong about any of them. Finally I came up with GROAN (Glorious Reviews & Opinions About Nothing). I think it best captures the theme I try to give my site. Skids brought up the point that I wasn't reviewing nothing. Closer to everything in fact. The "Nothing," however, is meant to show that my site really is just me jabbering about nothing worth listening to. Anyway, my site was ready to be built. After getting permission (though somewhat reluctantly) from Dad and recieving a small how-to course from Skids, I went to geocities and made myself a pseudonym. Neo McKellan--the name I gave geocities as my real name. Alias: Sarcastaman. My Split Personality It's not hard to figure out how I came up with my fake names: Neo--From the Matrix McKellan-- Ian McKellan (X-Men. Lord of the Rings) Sarcastaman-- don't make me explain this one. You can get it. Neo McKellan is myself when I'm not...well, when I'm not around idiots. He is the sweet, lovable, adorable me. He's kind of boring, but he's an okay guy. Whenever my well being is threatened by morons my superhero form emerges. The stopper of idiots, the creator of comebacks, the confuser of jocks, and the roller of eyeballs. It's Sarcastaman! (cue trumpet fanfare). Spinner of cynisism and wit, Sarcastaman fights for those in danger of loosing their high IQ when surrounded by those with no common sense (end fanfare). This site is meant to showcase the side of me that is Sarcastaman. Someone told me that I look like a satanic cult leader. Something about how, when I smile, my lips get thin and I look as if I could rip a man's face off. I polled people about whether or not they think this is true of me. I have about a 50-50 tie between both sides. Half agree with him and half disagree (for those of you who don't understand 50-50). I think that that evil look is Sarcastaman appearing in the flesh. Some can see him. Others see Neo McKellan. The person they see is who they think I'm most associated with. Those who see me as a cynical person see Sarcastaman. Those who see me as a nice, lovable guy see Neo (not to say that Sarcastaman can't be lovable). Actually, either one of them rarely appears. I am a combination of the two known as (named blocked out to protect myself). In the form in which I speak to you now, I exibit more of a playful sarcasm. I don't attack something I hate, but I try not to be serious. Neo appears when I know sarcasm is inappropriate at the moment. Sarcastaman appears when I am in full rant mode. My General View of Life On my site I deal with a variety of topics, so it's sometimes hard to know exactly how I feel about the world. The things in my site can be condensed down into these topics. 1. People are idiots (obviously). That's just the way the world works. Look at current events and history books. You'll find so many examples of people doing moronic things. 2. Oddly enough, people are basically good. I never said people were evil. Just stupid. Most people strive for the betterment of mankind. Even the NAZIs and the KKK believed what they were doing was for the best. You and I know they were full of %@*!, but I'm trying to make a point. Even though they were really screwed up in what makes the world better, they honestly thought what they were doing was right (there's an example of some idiots. Told you there were). 3. Technology is either amazing, worthless, of annoying. Nothing else. Television, video games, mp3 players, computers are all amazing. Air filters (they don't help that much), treadmills (go walk outside), subwoofers (they're cool, but we don't need them) are all worthless. Motorcycles (know how easy it is to die in one of these?), handheld TVs (they generally don't work well), those dance games that are so popular in Japan (I'm not even gonna try) are annoying. 4. Love and friendship are the most important things in the entire world. I hate to get soft on you, but this is how I feel (see The Other Meaning of Life ). Without loved ones and friends, life just doesn't seem worth living. 5. I don't care what you think of me. I didn't create this site to please others. I made it as a place I could rant without ticking off people who know me. I like to put my thoughts down here so they don't build up and explode inside me. I feel that explosion would be a crappy way to die. 6. Grammar is worthless. I misspell, I use imcorrect punctuation, and I'm never organized. Why? What's the poing? I'm not being graded. Are peopl really gong to think les of me because Im not perfect with th English languge? |
| About Sarcastaman |