| The Top 20 |
| Excuses for Screwing Up Onstage 20. I was plunging a new position. 19. I was busy smiling. 18. It's too (choose one: hot/cold/wet/dry/humid/windy). 17. The stage was too(choose one: uneven/small/bouncy/ narrow). 16. The (choose one: sun/moon/stagelights/rain) was in my eyes. 15. My partner messed me up. |
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| 14. The music was too loud/soft/ fast/slow. 13. My mind sent the signal, but my feet didn't get it. 12. My brain went into automatic Defrag. 11. It's too early to plunge before noon. 10. I looked at Crank-It-Up. |
| 9. I stepped on a rock. 8. I just realized I forgot my bloomers. 7. Pantyhose/Suspenders too tight. 6. I lost my (choose one: percussive shoe equipment/shoe/ hankie/mind). 5. Everyone else was off the beat and it confused me. |
| 4. I saw Slipshod Shuffler watching me. 3. My suspenders came undone and popped me in the eye. 2. My feet got in the way. And THE NUMBER ONE EXCUSE FOR SCREWING-UP ONSTAGE IS..... #1. It wasn't a screw-up. It was a True Interpretation. (As Per Golden Rule # 14). |
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