Sasquatch Militia Strikes at local Dariette!

No Casualities, undetermined number of employees and customers pissed off!

5/18/2002

A platoon of the Sasquatch Militia, utilizing the newly christened van of the Sasquatch Militia, struck again at a local Dariette, Leaving dozens pissed off and others lost in confusion. One man was 'about to snap' and upon exiting the institution grins and smirks where seen from practically and literally everyone within sight.

This is just a sample of the lethal power the Sasquatch Militia can utilize in order to extirpate, annoy, and 'piss off' anyone it pleases, whenever it pleases. "This is the new way things are going to be done" remarked the Secretary of Peace Paul "We are the aggressors and our enemies are the victims of our unstoppable wrath."

"It's like stealing candy from a baby" remarked Regional Commander 10th Grade Chett, about the simplicity and effectiveness of this operation. "You can only hope and pray that we don't strike again, we have practically unlimited power and the ability to strike anywhere with this new 'super van'." Later Chett was seen gourging himself incessantly with food retrieved from the Dariette. He would have said more, but he continued to indulge his rapacious appetite, not just for brotherly love and tolerance, but for the delicious food which was retrieved from the Dariette.

Members of the community were reluctant to admit that they were infiltrated by the hominoid fighting force. "I don't know what your talking about, what's a Sasquatch?" remarked one individual who was in obvious distress just minutes after the attack.

The Dariette was unavailable for comment.

The Sasquatch Militia will continue to induce havoc and fear in order to secure equal rights for all hominoids in all ways possible. Unsuspecting federalist military and intellegence institutions which pose as civilian homes, schools, and businesses will be addressed. The Darriete is obviously an undercover base used by the federalists to mount intellegence operations against the Sasquatch Militia, and needed to be liquidated with as little violence and as much havoc as possible.