The Pride of My Existence: The Lovely Red Ikea Couch by Savannah Hunter

The Lovely Red Ikea Couch was the first piece of furniture that I purchased brand new when I moved out on my own (the second being the ottoman which Frampy's has since claimed as his own). I love it dearly. It is a perfect piece of feminine propaganda, being so lovely and so red. Everyone loves Ikea.

So many things have happened on this couch, I can't even begin to name them (most of them are dirty), but they include Jon's midnight activities and the Survivor: Lovely Red Ikea Couch game.       In honour of this perfect piece of furniture, I have dedicated a poem:

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight For the ends of being and ideal grace. I love thee to the level of every day's Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light. I love thee freely, as men strive for right. I love thee purely, as they turn from praise. I love thee with the passion put to use In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith. I love thee with a love I seemed to lose With my lost saints. I love with the breath, Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose, I shall but love thee better after death. Elizabeth Barrett Browning