Catastrophe

No one really knew just how it started. Dief swore up and down that he was an innocent by-stander. The two turtles were busy eating. Turnbull refused to come out of his box and Inspector Thatcher was still in the hospital. Since Fraser and Ray Kowalski Vecchio had been out of town during the initial events, they had at best a sketchy idea of the occurrence which would come to be known as the Catastrophe at the Consulate. They had to rely on Frannie and her unique phrasings to explain the situation. They really hoped the Pet Psychic could help shed some light on the proceedings.

Everything had been fine until Turnbull decided it was time for spring cleaning and he opened all the windows to air out the Consulate. Unbeknownst to any of the human occupants, a cat entered the second story window of the Queen's Bedroom. This cat happened to be a very independent feline who was on a mission. She was an extremely handsome black and white feline, except for the broken tail and the slightly crossed-eyes and the huge belly

Dief knew right away that there was an uninvited guest in the Consulate. . Dief did not care for adult cats and he was particularly offended because this cat had somehow gotten past him. He tried to tell Fraser, but because Fraser was preoccupied with preparing for his out-of-town training, Dief's

warnings fell on deaf ears. So Arabella, as she thought of herself, ensconced herself in the Queen's Bedroom. She settled in and prepared to deliver her kittens. She found the perfect hiding place and settled in to wait.

Turnbull had kindly volunteered to keep Ray's turtles and Dief while Ray and Benton were out of town. Sappho and Butch's tank was on a counter in the kitchen. The two turtles had no complaints. Turnbull did tend to natter on more than Ray, but the turtles paid little attention, so it really did not matter. Plus he served delicious salads, so that made up for the constant chatter when he was around.

Turnbull had been happily sweeping the upstairs hallway when Dief snuck past with his hackles raised and stood growling. in the doorway of the Queen's Bedroom . Turnbull was so engrossed in his sweeping that he neither saw nor heard Dief. As he merrily swept his way toward the wolf. Turnbull remembered that he had forgotten to feed Sappho and Butch. He leaned his broom against the wall and went downstairs to the kitchen where the turtles' tank had been placed. He fed the two turtles, gave them fresh water and wished them a glorious spring.

All of a sudden a scream echoed throughout the building. Turnbull, who had been holding Sappho was bitten by the frightened turtle. He muttered something about turtle soup. In his haste and fright, he dropped the turtle and upset the turtle tank and poor Sappho and Butch went sailing onto the kitchen floor. This flustered Turnbull even more and in his panic he slid on the spilt turtle food and found himself flat on his back. The two turtles took this opportunity to scuttle under the refrigerator. They had certainly heard the turtle soup comment and decided to stay safely hidden. The scream echoed again. Turnbull got himself to his knees and crawled out of the kitchen. When he reached the doorway, he finally stood up. He rushed up the stairway and dashed down the hallway.

He found himself in front of Inspector Thatcher whose face was as scarlet as her uniform and was

radiating anger. She screamed at Turnbull that there was a creature in the Queen's Bedroom. Dief could be heard growling and Turnbull looked into the bedroom to see Dief standing in front of the bed with his hackles raised and his teeth bared. Turnbull retrieved his trusty broom and holding it over his head he advanced into the room. Turnbull could not have known that Arabella hated brooms.

As soon as he was inside the room a blur leaped at him and he felt sharp stings where her claws dug into his flesh. There was an unholy yowling noise He tried to swipe at the creature with the broom but only managed to break an antique lamp. The lamp crashed to the ground and landed on Dief's tail. The startled wolf yelped and crawled under the bed. It was there that he discovered Araabella's secret. He could smell the fact that she had given birth. Now Dief did not particularly like adult cats. When it came to kittens, however, the halfwolf was a big furry pile of mush. One of his secret desires was to have a kitten. Well, it wasn't so secret. He had tried to tell Fraser he wanted a kitten, but Fraser never understood. Ever since Fraser had told him about the gorilla thing that used sign language, getting a kitten, Dief wanted one. Dief understood now why the cat was so upset. He wished his friend the Pet Psychic Lady was around. She would understand. She would help fix things But since she wasn't there, Dief would have to do the best he could with Old Block of Wood and the Cold Lady. He crawled out from under the bed and went to find the kittens. He found what he was looking for in a decorative hat box in the half opened closet. He nosed the lid off of the box and gazed at five tiny little squirming bodies. Well three tiny little squirming bodies, two were not moving very much.. He stuck his head in the box and nuzzled one of the unmoving kittens. Pitiful mewing sounds began. The kitten tried to suckle Dief's nose and he jerked his head back out of the box. He pushed the lid back on the box and dragged it out into the hallway. He found where Arabella was hiding and told her her children were hungry, especially the little grey one..

After Arabella had attacked Turnbull,. she careened into the hallway, running right into Inspector Thatcher, knocking her off balance. The Inspector went down hard on her ankle which snapped loudly. Thatcher screamed in pain. The cat disappeared down the hallway.

After two days of hobbling after the cat throughout the building., Thatcher decided to call Animal Control. After watching the Animal control officer and Turnbull get tangled up repeatedly and Turnbull ended up with the catchsnare around his neck, Thatcher decided to call the Pet Psychic and see if she could help.

Dief had been watching the proceedings from a safe corner and sat whuffling and snickering at the silly humans. The hat box was tucked safely behind a potted plant.

Turnbull called Frannie and explained the situation to her and asked if she would pick the Psychic up at the airport. Frannie agreed. She hoped that Fraser's return and the Pet Psychic's arrival would clear up the situation.

Frannie met Ray and Fraser at the airport entrance. "Oh my gosh, Am I glad to see you guys.

The Consulate is a mess. Turnbull , you know how sensitive Turnbull is, is a suitcase."

Frannie, I think you mean basket case. " Ray said.

"Basket case, suitcase, shopping bag, whatever, the poor guy is unlocked."

"Unhinged." Both Fraser and Ray replied.

"You know what I mean." Frannie huffed.

Ray asked Frannie what she was doing at the airport and Frannie explained that she was there to pick up the Pet Psychic to take her to the Consulate.

"Whatever for?" Fraser asked.

"Well, the Inspector felt she might be able to figure out what to do about the creature."

"The Creature, what creature? She's not talking about my turtles, is she?" Ray asked.

"No, I don't think so unless this turtle has meditated"

"Could you possibly mean mutated." Fraser asked.

"Mutated, meditated, mukluked, yeah, whatever." Frannie sighed.

Fraser and Ray excused themselves, had a whispered conversation and returned to Frannie.

Fraser told her that they thought it best that she and Fraser return to the Consulate as soon as possible.

Ray would wait for The Pet Psychic and deliver her to the Consulate after her flight arrived without subjecting her to Frannie's malapropisms. .

Fraser and Frannie took a cab back to the Consulate and entered the building to find there was no one on the first floor. The kitchen was a mess. They went upstairs to find Inspector Thatcher lying in the hallway writhing in pain. This time she had fallen and her wrist had snapped. They could hear Turnbull thrashing around in the Queen's Bedroom. They entered to find two shapes writhing around on the bed tangled in the bedclothes. They uncovered the forms to reveal Turnbull and the Animal Control Officer, who had a black eye. Both of them bore scratches. Dief was sitting in front of a chest of doors He was making odd noises and doing his version of the puffin face. He looked like he was in pain.. There was a decorative hat box beside him. The media got word of the strange goings on at the Consulate when they intercepted the 911 call Fraser made.

When Ray and the Pet Psychic arrived they found the entrance blocked by an ambulance and several police cars, two animal control units, and many vehicles bearing the call letters of the various media and the papers. There was a small army of protesters carrying signs protesting animal cruelty. Ray flashed his badge and pushed his way through the crowd. When they got inside the building Fraser dashed past and shouted: "Thank God you are here". Then he was gone upstairs.

Ray and the Psychic followed him upstairs and found themselves faced with several Animal

Control Officers, two representatives of the local Humane Society. The Pet Psychic immediately went to one of the rooms and found Arabella hiding behind a clothes press. Dief made his way into the room holding the Hat Box handle in his mouth. He gently placed the box in front of her and sat down. He whined and huffed his story. There was a small army of people gathered around the door.

Arabella came out and sat by the box. The Pet Psychic removed the lid and admired her beautiful children. Dief stuck his head inside the box and proudly shoved at his favorite. The little grey kitten mewed and reached up to suckle his nose. Everyone laughed and ohhed and ahhhed.

A paramedic came up the stairs and told Fraser they were ready to take Thatcher to the hospital.

Fraser was asked to make a comment to the press.

Blushing furiously he stammered: "That at the time The RCMP and The Canadian Consulate had no comment 'For fear of bringing embarrassment upon the Force."'*

After things had calmed down and Arabella and her offspring were taken away by the Humane Society, Turnbull finally remembered the turtles. He and Ray rushed into the kitchen and found the empty turtle tank lying on the floor. Fraser, Dief and the Pet Psychic came into the kitchen. Dief went over to the refrigerator and he Woofed. Ray came to him leaned over saw his two turtles and called to them. The Pet Psychic told him they were afraid to come out because Turnbull had threatened to make them into soup. Ray glared at Turnbull. He stammered: "I can assure you I did not mean it. I was upset because the turtle bit me." Then he ran from the building went

straight into his box and sobbed.

The pet Psychic assured the two turtles that Turnbull had no intention of making them into soup and slowly, slowly Sappho and Butch crawled out from under the refrigerator. Then the Pet Psychic turned to Fraser and said: "Constable Fraser, Diefenbaker wants to know when he can get his kitten, Nosey back?"

* Actual comment made by RCMP Constable Charles Brown after a similar incident caused by a broom in Torbrook, Canada as reported in the papers.

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