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| A European's Struggle to Fit into America |
| (read with an Italian accent!) I am an Italiano. One day ima go to L.A. to a bigga hotel. Ina morning I go down to eat soma breakfast. I tella waitress I wanna two piss toast. She branga me only onea piss. I tell her i wanna two piss. She say go to the toilet. I say you no understand, I wanna two piss ona my plate. She say you no better piss ona plate, you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know the lady and she call me sonna ma bitch! I don't even knowa the lady and she call me sonna ma bitch. Later I go to eat somma lunch at the bigga restaurant. The waitress branga me a spoon but no fock. I tell her I wanna fock. She say everybody wanna fock. I tella her you no understand, I wanna fock on the table. she tellsa me you better no fock on my table, you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know the lady and she call me sonna ma bitch! So I go back to my room inna hotel and there is no shits onna my bed. I call the manager and say I wanna shit. He tell me go to the toilet, so I say you no understand. I wanna shit onna my bed. Hey say you no better shit onna bed, you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know the man and he call me sonna ma bitch. I go to the checkout and the man at the desk say: "Peace on you." I say piss onna you too, you sonna ma bitch. I go back to Italy! |
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