| ^j^ Fallen Angel ^j^ I flew last night... I flew away from all the pain... I was the fallen angel.... I flew from my disgrace.... I flew to be alone... I flew to feel free from your grip on me... the one who tried to drown me in sorrow... the one who trys to make me feel shame for the feelings I hold within my heart... (feelings for us why is it so wrong?) why must you touture me so... why cant I feel what it is I feel... why do you make it my disgrace..... to make me feel I am the fallen angel... like I have to hide away here alone... always so alone with you..... how can I be with you & be so alone.... the emptyness rings through me like the tolling bell for the dead.... I flew last night ... I flew away from all the pain.... I was the fallen angel.... I flew from my disgrace..... I flew to be alone... as if I were not alone enough in this world with you as my captor.... you bind my heart in chains...... you weight me down with sorrow... you fling me out to nothingness.... my spirt you have almost broken... my dreams have all fadded into the black... the chains you bind my heart with are killing me, they are crushing my soul... my freedom you will not give me.... you hold me close to your terrors.... to laugh at mine... you have no understanding of me... you do not understand my love... you return nothing I give, and take all.... that wich you do not understand you cut my down for, only taking what you want.... and leaving the rest to throw in my face... you used the word 'mercy' once... I wonder how that word came to be in your mind? or any words of this kind, mercy, love, grace, silense, kindness, forgiviness, understanding, care what do you know of these words? the words you use in 'speech'.... but your words are empty of action.... so much for faith with so many broken promisses.... how can you call what you give to me love??? how will I feel love when I am laughed at time & time again... I open the door, I try to trust you and you storm in....trash my mind.... tell me how weak I am, is this love.... is it love that I let you? what is it...... I fly so high...the chains are gone here... I am free, I can laugh, I can cry.... I can be happy in my dreams here I am still and angel... here I am free from you... I am free from being alone.... you know not who I am, nor how I fly in my dreams, to escape you, to escape the pain you bring to my heart... ~ Rain © cls |