A/N: Heh, it's going to be interesting to see just how the heck I'm going to post this since I really don't have access to a computer let alone the internet right now...looks like another trip to the public library is in order. *sigh* Oh, well. Anyway, here's the next installment of this twisted bit I call a story. I should warn you, though- I'm on a massive Destiny's Child kick, so... ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Disclaimer: Do we still need this after 4 parts? *sigh* I don't own Slayers, and I don't own the song. Pity me. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ "Ano...Lina-san...you're scaring me...please don't look at me like that...Lina-san?" Amelia whimpered as Lina slowly approached her, murder in her eyes. "Oi, Lina?" Gourry tapped her on the shoulder, drawing her attention away from the terrified princess. Lina turned around slowly, the dangerous look still present in her eyes. "What did you think?" "What...did...I...think?!" Lina repeated. "I think you proved just how much of a jellyfish you are! That's what I thought!" she cried, putting him in a headlock. "So...you liked it then?" Gourry deduced, earning him yet another hit to the head courtesy of Lina's fist. "Like you could do much better," Zelgadis muttered a little too loudly, and Lina turned to him. "Is that a challenge?" she growled at him. Zelgadis snorted and shrugged. "I'm just saying that..." Lina cut him off before he could finish his sentence. "Fine! I'll show you talent!" she huffed, then stomped her way up to the stage. "Lina-san! You forgot this!" Xelloss called after her, holding up a bright pink costume, and earning himself a fireball to the face just before Lina began her song. ~~~What you think about a girl like me?~~~ "Well, violent comes to mind," Zelgadis grumbled. "Not to mention greedy," Xelloss added. "And small-breasted," Gourry nodded. Lina growled and fireballed them all from onstage before continuing. ~~~Buy my own car and spend my own money~~~ Zelgadis and Filia snorted simultaneously, shaking their heads. ~~~Only ring your celly when I'm feeling lonely~~~ ~~~When it's all over please get up and leave~~~ Filia pulled Xelloss back into his seat. "It's not over yet!" "Darn," Xelloss muttered and pouted before grinning at Filia again. ~~~Please don't call me baby~~~ ~~~Cause I'll call you~~~ ~~~Don't mean to hurt your feelings, got a lot to do~~~ ~~~Cause I am my number one priority~~~ Zelgadis snorted again. "Really. You don't say." Amelia frowned slightly at him. "Zelgadis-san, you really shouldn't be so mean to Lina-san..." ~~~No falling in love, no commitment from me~~~ ~~~All my independent women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~And all my sexy women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ Zelgadis took a sip of his coffee, but choked on it when he saw Xelloss' hands shoot up. "Fruitcake..." he muttered. ~~~All my money-making women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~All my baller women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ "Ano...what's a 'baller woman'?" Gourry asked Zelgadis, who just sighed. "I don't know; why don't you go ask one of them?" he asked, gesturing to his other three companions. ~~~If you feel it~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up~~~ ~~~Where them hands at?~~~ ~~~If you feel it?~~~ ~~~Where the ladies?~~~ ~~~Where my homegirls?~~~ ~~~Where my females?~~~ ~~~Where all my women?~~~ Gourry turned to Amelia, the one nearest Zelgadis. "Amelia?" "Hai, Gourry-san?" Amelia replied, pulling her attention briefly away from Lina. ~~~How you feel about a girl like this?~~~ ~~~Try to control me, boy you'll get dismissed~~~ "What's a 'baller woman'?" Amelia blinked. "A 'baller woman'? I don't know..." She thought for a moment. "I know, why don't you ask Filia-san?" ~~~Do what I want, live how I wanna live~~~ ~~~Buy my own diamonds, and pay my own bills~~~ "More like steal," Zelgadis grumbled as Gourry walked over to Filia and Xelloss, and plopped himself down next to Filia. "Ano...Filia?" he began. "Yes, Gourry-san?" ~~~Please don't call me baby~~~ ~~~Cause I'll call you~~~ ~~~Don't mean to hurt your feelings~~~ ~~~Got a lot to do~~~ ~~~Cause I am my number one priority~~~ ~~~No falling in love, no commitment from me~~~ "What's a 'baller woman'?" he asked yet again. "A what??? A 'baller woman'?" Filia looked puzzled for a moment. "I don't really know..." ~~~All my independent women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~And all my sexy women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~All my money-making women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~All my baller women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ "I do..." Xelloss grinned mischieviously. "Really? What is it?" Gourry asked, sounding like a little kid who was just about to find out what his birthday surprise was. ~~~If you feel it~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up~~~ ~~~Where them hands at?~~~ ~~~If you feel it?~~~ ~~~Where my ladies?~~~ ~~~Where my homegirls?~~~ ~~~Where my females?~~~ ~~~Where all my women?~~~ "Basically, a 'baller woman' is a girl who likes to feel your..." "XELLOSS!!!" Filia's mace crashed down on the top of his head. "Hentai..." "Itaiii...I love you, too, Fi-chan!" Xelloss grinned, rubbing his head. ~~~How did you feel about this groove I wrote?~~~ "Frightened and disturbed," Zelgadis muttered. ~~~Hope you got the message ladies take control~~~ "Oooh, everyone loves a dominatrix...right, Fi-chan?" Xelloss giggled. "Hentai....namagomi...." Filia muttered, blushing a rather bright shade of red. Xelloss grinned and stuck his tongue out at her. ~~~Don't depend on no man to give you what you want~~~ ~~~Keep that in mind next time you hear this song~~~ "Which hopefully won't be anytime soon..." Zelgadis grumbled. "Zelgadis-san, you're awfully crabby today, even for you. Are you okay?" Amelia asked him, resting a hand on his shoulder. ~~~If you're independent~~~ ~~~I congratulate you~~~ ~~~If you ain't in love~~~ ~~~I congratulate you~~~ ~~~Do them boys like they used to do you~~~ ~~~If you pimp him~~~ ~~~I congratulate you~~~ Zelgadis shrugged lightly. "I just think that there are a lot more important things we could be doing right now, instead of sitting here while we make idiots out of ourselves one by one." "Oh, Zelgadis-san, I understand how you feel, but you need to have some fun once in a while, okay?" Amelia smiled up at him. Zelgadis hid a smile. "Alright, Amelia, you win," he replied. ~~~All my independent women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~And all my sexy women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~All my money-making women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~All my baller women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ "I still don't know what that is!" Gourry whined. ~~~If you feel it~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up~~~ ~~~Where them hands up~~~ ~~~If you feel it?~~~ ~~~Where the ladies?~~~ ~~~Where my homegirls?~~~ ~~~Where my females?~~~ ~~~Where all my women?~~~ ~~~If I hurt your feelings boy~~~ ~~~I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you~~~ ~~~I thought you knew~~~ ~~~I got no time to fall in love with you~~~ "Yeah, right, what with beating on all those bandits, fighting darklords, putting up with Xelloss..." "But Zelgadis-san, doesn't she love G-" "Shhh...we're not supposed to notice that, Amelia." ~~~All my independent women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~And all my sexy women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~All my money-making women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~All my baller women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~All my independent women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~And all my sexy women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~All my money-making women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ ~~~All my baller women~~~ ~~~Throw them hands up at me~~~ Lina hopped off the stage, grinning. "Heh, heh...beat /that/!" Zelgadis sighed, then turned to Amelia again. "You're our last hope, Amelia. Make it count." Amelia looked at him quizzically, but nodded and made her way up to the stage. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
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