If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on the line.
If you have amnesia, press 8 and state you name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and
your mother's and grandmother's maiden names.
If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, slowly and
carefully press 000.
If you have short term memory loss, please try your call
again later.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All of our operators are far too busy to talk to you.
Last
updated 01/31/05
