I look out the window. The sky is gray. It’s raining. It’s steady like a waterfall. I walk away and stare at a picture on the coffee table. It’s a picture of Shane and me. Shane, the love of my life, my dearest lover. You made me complete… and now you are gone. I miss you so much. I still can’t believe you left me without saying goodbye.
We went out three days later. He took me to dinner at a very expensive Italian restaurant in north Greenwich. The food was delicious; I never had anything so good. We shared dessert and he paid the check. I was surprised when we came back to his house and asked me to come in. It was everything I guessed it would me. Expensive sculptures, paintings decorated the living room. It was the things that you expect to see in the heir apparent house. I was in awe. I never expected anything like that. I followed him up to his bedroom. We made love that night. It was hot; our first time. He liked it very much and we did it the next time we were on a date.
He liked me fucking him, fast and hard, he always liked that. Sucking on his cock was wonderful; he tasted sweet. He couldn’t get enough of it…he begged for more…
A whole year, Hunter and I dated for a year before we broke up. We had a lot of fights but not like the one we had that day. He let it slip that he had been seeing Kurt Angle behind my back. I felt hot tears well up in my eyes and yelled at him to get out of my house and out of my life. He tried to argue but I told him to shut up and he left. I didn’t watch him leave. That night I threw a framed picture if us against the wall. The glass shattered and the frame broke in a thousand pieces. I left it there. I walked to my study and opened a desk drawer. I grab a bottle of brandy. I twist off the cap and took a long drink. It burned down my throat a little and warmed my belly. I drank in my sorrow and pain that night.
I woke up the next morning with a monstrous hangover. I stayed home all day, getting over it. I ignored the phone calls. Dad. Mom. Stephanie three times. Hunter called several times but I didn’t answer it. He cheated on me with the Olympic Hero. I couldn’t ever forgive him for that.
I’m so afraid to love you, but more afraid to lose
Clinging to a past that doesn’t let me choose
Once there was a darkness, deep and endless night
You gave me everything you had,
Oh you gave me light
I stayed at home, watching TV and movies. I jogged a little at the park. I saw Stephanie and Lita there. Steph waved and I walked over to them.
“Hey, Shane. How are you?” she asked.
“I’m doing fine.” I looked at her and then Lita. Their relationship was doing well unlike mine.
“Hi, Shane.” Lita said. “Sorry to hear you and Hunter broke up.”
“Yeah.”
“See you Shane.” Stephanie said.
I jogged away. I could hear her whispering something to Lita but I was too far away to hear what she said. I jogged back home. I drank some orange juice and took a quick shower. I sat down in my recliner and watched more TV.
A few days passed and I grew tired of staying home. I decided to go back to work…
I didn’t care anymore. I was over him. I walked into my office and shut the door behind me. I saw an envelope on my desk. It was addressed to me. I slowly opened it. It was a letter from Hunter. It was really long; five pages. I read it and by the time I finished I was crying. He wrote in the letter that he hoped that we would become friends and that he was sorry for what he did to me.
He was happy with his relationship with Kurt He had moved on and now it was my turn. I still loved you, Hunter. I do.