Garry drowned on holiday in Cornwall. He was fishing, one of his favourite pastimes. It was Sunday June 26th 1994. His old friends all called him Jack and he was a Jack the lad, he had so many friends and he was always at the centre of the group. He loved life and crammed so much into it.

How do you write of your deep sorrow on losing your son, you cannot. I want him to be remembered always, his name always spoken. He is part of our lives and our family, as he always will be. We love and miss him deeply, but always, always he is with us.

It is 2001, seven years since the death of my oldest son Garry. I have tried to write this so many times and failed. How can I write my sons memory without telling his life story. His memory, his spirit and everything he was is locked in my heart. It is my dearest treasure, it is also the source of my deep sorrow. He walks with me daily, wherever I go, whatever I do, Garry is with me.

Now seven years on there are many good things in my life, but always Garry is there, always in my mind, always in my heart. I will have his presence in my soul until the day I die.

It is such a very hard long road to walk this grief, it catches you unaware and you are plunged back into the sheer pure pain with no defence against it.

Where do we all find the strength to face tomorrow, to get through another day to face our daily lives. I have to believe that we never walk alone, our beloved children walk with us daily. They are in our hearts always, walking with us through our tomorrows, uniting us in friendship and love.

  IN MEMORY OF MY SON GARRY

How long will the pain last? Brokenhearted parents ask me.
All the rest of your life. I have to answer truthfully.
We never forget, no matter how many years pass, we remember.
The loss of our child is like a major operation.
Part of us is removed and we have a scar for the rest of our lives.
As the years go by we manage.
There are things to do, people to car for, jobs that call for full attention,
But the pain is still there, always.
We see a face that looks familiar, hear a voice that echoes, see a photograph in someones album,
See a landscape that once we saw together, and it seems as though a knife were in the wound again.
Oh so painfully, but mixed with joy too,
Because remembering a happy time is not all sorrow, it brings back happiness with it.
How long will the pain last?
All the rest of your life. But the thing to remember is,
Not only will the pain last, but the blessed memories as well.
Tears are proof of life, the more love, the more tears.
If this be true, then how could we ever ask that the pain cease altogether.
For then the memory of love would go with it.
The pain of grief is the price we pay for love.