The
Dartnel
September
29, 2006
Things
Banned
Did you know that the Bible is considered a
"banned book" for being "obscene and pornographic"? The Diary of Anne Frank is considered banned
for being "a real downer".
Gone with the Wind is banned because Scarlett O'Hara behaves ruthlessly
and immorally. Asimov, Shakespeare,
Twain, Hemmingway, Harper Lee... all with "banned books".
I'm currently in the library, and it's Banned Books
Week. Oddly enough, my self-help book,
How to Annoy Girls, isn't considered banned.
Neither is my autobiography, 1,001 Ways to Get Behind in Life. (I wonder if I got the titles reversed?) To be honest, I don't know what constitutes a
book becoming banned. Also, if these
books are banned, then why can I still check them out in my local library?
Darrell
September
25, 2006
Dartnel Lite Simulcast
If anybody has been paying attention to the Dartnel
this month, they’ve been wasting their time!
I have been busy updating my MySpace blog; there’s a link to that blog
up above, in bold print. What follows
are the entries I’ve made there this month.
Included is a much-asked-for interview with me. It’s about as serious as that April Fools’
story I published. If you haven’t
visited Dartnel Lite
already, please do so, and enjoy this simulcast!
Darrell
September
23, 2006
It's
a Sell-Off!
Anybody who complains about me overblogging needs to
get a life... and sell it to me! I've gone craaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazy!!!
I'm overstocked with old lives, and I need to upgrade. Now, for a low,
low price, you too can have an exciting new life!!! Want to be a
nearsighted math nerd? Yours for $19.99! Want to be the guy who
always gets stuck with the funny hat? $14.99! Want to be
lovesick? I'll pay you $9.99! (sorry, "sold"
already) Want to wear out a '92 Tempo? Too late; I beat you to
it!!!
Moment of insanity passed.
I have a job interview this Monday. I'm
probably preaching to the choir here, since most of my visitors here, I reckon,
are on my Friends list and saw my bulletin on the interview already. It's
been nearly three years!!! since I graduated summa cum laude from NSU
with my accounting degree. And I thought an advanced degree in philosophy
was bad... Oh, well. I'll get something soon, God willing.
He's got a plan for me that I know nothing about, and He'll provide.
By the way, for those of you who are wondering, no,
I'm not bald. I just have more forehead than I used to have.
Darrell
September
21, 2006
Twenty Questions: Darrell Plummer, Jr.
DRT Media, 1313 CST, 21 Sept. 2006
Recently, our correspondent sat down with so-called
webmaster Darrell "Dartman" Plummer, Jr. His MySpace blog
recently celebrated its 225th viewing, and his popular Web site has received
numerous unasked-for solicitations from people who needed money.
Here is our twenty-question interview:
1.
How old are you? Twenty-seven years, three months, seven days,
eighteen hours, fifty-six minutes...
2. Thank you, Mr. Data. As long as we're on the subject,
favorite Star Trek character? Bones "I'm a doctor, not an
escalator!" McCoy
3. Sorry I asked. Any siblings? Three: older half-brother
Jason, younger sister Christa, older brother Matt
4. Favorite animal? Cats! My heart melts whenever I
see one.
5. Okay, it's Saturday night. You're on a date. Where do
you take her? People are going to read this, right? If
they're as odd as you, then they will. Thanks for the insult!
I'll say dinner and a movie, but don't hold me to that.
6. How much do you spend? Next question, please.
7. Fine. Height? 5'11"
8. Weight? About two to three hours.
9. Fine, wise guy. Mass? I'm not Catholic; I'm
Baptist.
10. That DOES answer a later question, so one more time: HOW
MUCH DO YOU WEIGH?!?!?!? Oh, about 130.
11. What was your favorite subject in school? That's easy,
all my math classes.
12. Math nerd, huh? Next question, please.
12. Not counting that last one. Life saying? Live
every day to the fullest.
14. AM counting first #12. Favorite music? Statler
Brothers and the Cathedral Quartet.
15. Least favorite music? Rap, heavy metal
16. Who was your biggest crush in high school? Next
question, please.
17. Who had the biggest crush on you? Next question, please.
18. Do you want me to slap you silly? You're a loser.
19. Why are you so mean? Because you ask stupid questions.
20. Why did I even agree to this? You must be as dumb as you
are ugly.
Darrell
September
18, 2006
Irony
Does anyone else find it odd that many Muslims,
being insulted by the Pope's quoting of a 14th-century figure who claimed Islam
is a violence-based religion, have resorted to violence because of this?
It's the same thing with that cartoon last year. Call our Prophet a
violent person, huh? We'll show you! Then they get all
violent. Seems to me that, if someone calls your religion one of
violence, you go out and try extra hard to prove that person wrong. You
don't go out and prove that person right.
I realize that I'm overgeneralizing here.
Still, you get my point, and I do apologize to anybody I offended. Then
again, at least until Katie gets her pro-feline party up and running, I'm not
a public figure, so I don't have to watch what I say as carefully.
Darrell
September
12, 2006
Does
God Hate?
There are things that really make me want to vomit.
Yesterday, a group of "God-fearing
Christians" (the quotes and italics are meant to indicate sarcasm)
demonstrated on the fifth anniversary of 9/11. Probably most of you have
heard about them, and I have no intention of giving these "God-fearing
Christians" any further recognition, but I must state how horrended I
was. For those of you who don't know about these "God-fearing
Christians", they were actually celebrating and thanking God for
9/11! Their position is that God is punishing the
What scripture are these "God-fearing
Christians" using? Mine says that God loves everybody.
I believe that homosexuality is a sin, but I don't believe that God hates
these people. Love the sinner, hate the sin. He even loves these "God-fearing
Christians". A song comes to mind: His Love is a
boundless love. God is Love. Its opposite? Satan is Hate.
I hope I don't offend with this; if so, I'll
probably delete it. This is my blog, and I'll express my feelings.
Gay-bashing is not an activity that any good Christian should indulge
in. We as Christians should reach out to everybody, not deciding who we
witness to via discriminating factors. Jesus said to witness to everybody
in the world; He didn't say to exclude certain people. Look at the people
He associated with! If Jesus was here today physically, He would be
ministering to anybody who would listen, regardless of race, gender,
orientation, wealth, etc. Shouldn't we?
This turned into a sermon, didn't it? I'm
sorry, but I have to express how I feel. These "God-fearing
Christians" were basically slandering the Lord, and it upset me.
I can only pray that they let go of their hateful ideas.
Darrell
September
11, 2006
Five
Years Later…
Five years ago today, our world changed. War
was declared on us by a group of extremists whose desire is to force the world
to convert to their religious viewpoint or be killed by them. They
hijacked our planes, destroyed two of our tallest skyscrapers, damaged a vital
government center, shook our confidence, and most importantly, took nearly
3,000 innocent lives with them.
I wish I could have seen the hijackers' faces when
they came to in hell. They were promised eternal paradise, 50 virgins and
the like. They were told that God reveres violence and would greatly
reward those who killed so-called infidels. Then, after the planes they
were flying blew up, they awoke in eternal agony. Evil may win in the
short run, but scripture shows that the final victory will go to the
good. I don't mean to impose my religious beliefs on you; I simply mean
to tell you how I feel. God loves all of us. No matter what we've
done, if we'll just go to Him and confess our sins and ask for forgiveness,
He'll give it to us. One other thing I believe: We shouldn't force
our beliefs on other people. The worst thing a Christian can do is to
tell somebody to repent or they'll die Godless. That's basically what
these Al Qaeda-type groups do: repent or die. I'll get off this
train now.
Five years later, are we any safer from these
terrorists? Yes, but not as safe as we should be. We can quibble
over what government is and isn't doing, but as a country, we are safer from
terrorist attacks. At least we now recognize the threat. The
terrorists sought to shake us, to have us live in constant fear of
attack. They sought to turn the world into Taliban-led
What was I doing on 9/11? Scrambling to finish
a biology project, going to biology lab, having my biology project stolen or
thrown away (THAT was what really got my goat), working at CASC's
student affairs office, and keeping track of the horrors that abounded that
day. What am I doing today? What I normally do.
Darrell
September
07, 2006
A
Gas Conspiracy?
I'm sure you've all noticed the drastic plunge in
gas prices over the past few weeks.
Yeah, sure, there are plenty of good reasons: ample supply of oil and
gasoline, end of summer driving season, lack of hurricanes,
Let me posit.
As we all know, Republicans are in potentially big trouble in these
mid-term mud-slinging contests; we know them as Congressional elections. Well, they're in trouble until the Democrats
figure out a way to mess things up. But
I digress. The going theory is that Big
Oil has the Republican party in its hip pocket (personally, I think that if
Democrats were in power, Big Oil would have them in its hip pocket, but that
belief kind of messes up my conspiracy theory, so I won't mention it). Assuming that's true, it stands to reason
that Big Oil doesn't want to see the Republicans lose.
The two big factors hurting the Republican Party are
the high price of gasoline and the war in
Okay, even I don't believe this outlandish theory I
made up. I'm just having a little fun at
my expense. Personally, I think JFK's
assassin was Mr. Spock from Star Trek.
Darrell
September
5, 2006
I
Hate Politics!
Well, here we are at the "official" start
of the campaigning season for mid-term Congressional elections. This, of course, means that, for the next
month while in session, Congress will make its work over the past few months
look as though they were really
cranking out the product! (This year's
Congress has done even less work than I have!)
Here are the big problems in politics:
1. Republicans
hate Democrats and blame them for everything.
2. Democrats
hate Republicans and blame them for more than everything.
3. Moderates
can take a flying leap; only extreme conservatives or extreme liberals need
apply.
4. In a
supposedly middle-class society, we are ruled... err, governed... err, represented
by a bunch of glory-hogging multimillionaires.
I honestly believe that a politician who listens to
his/her constituents, follows his conscience, refuses to sell his/her vote to
special interests, refuses to go along with his/her party when he/she disagrees
with the party's position, and actually does what he/she promised he/she would
do in Washington will go down as just another lame one-term
Congressperson. Both parties are equally
bad.
I'm a registered Democrat who leans Republican in
his thinking, and I thoroughly dislike both parties. In '04, I didn't vote specifically for either
Bush or Crappy... err, Kerry. I voted
straight-line Republican for president, and had there been a third-party
candidate on
Either way, our country is in trouble. We're not
represented. Both parties are looking
out for who's #1, and it isn't us. When
did
End of rant.
Darrell