Bart: Hello is
Bart: Jacques, Last name Strap.
Moe: Hold on. Jacques Strap! Hey, guys, I'm looking for a Jacques
Bart: Is Oliver
Bart: Oliver Klozoff
Moe: Hold on I'll check.
Moe: Oliver Klozoff! Call for Oliver Klozoff.
Moe: Hello, Moe's
Tavern - birthplace of Rob Roy.
Bart: Is Seymour there? Last name Butts.
Moe: Just a sec. Hey is there a Butts here? Seymour Butts? Hey,
everybody, I wanna Seymour Butts!
Moe: Hey, wait a minute. LIsten, you little scum-sucking
pus-bucket. When I get my hands on you, I'm gonna pull out your eyeball
with a corkscrew.
Bart: Hello is Homer
Moe: Homer who?
Bart: Homer Sexual
Moe: Wait one second, let me check. Homer Sexual. Ah, come on, one
of you guys has gotta be a Homer Sexual.
Moe: Oh no, you rotten little punk! If I ever get my hands on you,
I'll sink my teeth into your cheek and rip your face off!
Bart: Uh, hello. Is
Mike there? Last name, Rotch?
Moe: Hold on, I'll check. Mike Rotch! Mike Rotch! Hey, has anybody
seen Mike Rotch lately?
Bart: Uh, yes, I'm
looking for a friend of mine. Last name Jass, first name Hugh.
Moe: Hold on, I'll check. Hugh Jass, Hey, I wanna Hugh Jass. Oh,
somebody check the men's room for a Hugh Jass.
Hugh: Uh, I'm Hugh Jass.
Hugh: Hello, this is Hugh Jass.
Bart: Uh, hi.
Hugh: Who's this?
Bart: Bart Simpson
Hugh: What can I do for you, Bart?
Bart: Uh, look, I'll level with you, mister. This is a crank call
that sorta backfired and I'd like to bail out right now.
Hugh: All right. Better luck next time.
Moe: Moe's Tavern,
Bart: Uh, yes, I'm looking for a Mrs. O'Problem? First name, Bea?
Moe: Uh, yeah, just a minute, I'll check. Uh Bea O'Problem? Bea
O'Problem! Come on guys, do I have a Bea O'Problem here?
Barney: You sure do!
Moe: Oh... It's you, isn't it! Listen, you. When I get a hold of
you, I'm going to use your head for a bucket and paint my house with your
Moe: Hey, just a
sec, I'll check. Amanda Huggenkiss. Hey, I'm looking for Amanda Huggenkis!
Why can't I find Amanda Huggenkis?
Laura: Hello, I'd
like to talk to Ms. Tinkle. First name... Ivana.
Moe: Ivana Tinkle. Just a sec. Ivana Tinkle? Ivana Tinkle! Alright
everybody, put down your glasses - Ivana Tinkle!