A cloudy forested world. SG1 has been marching across it for some distance, looking for the camp spotted by the UAV. Everyone hits the deck as staff weapon blasts burst over their heads. The team takes cover behind a ridge. Peering over the crest they see a group of Jaffa fighting a pinned down SG unit. Teal’c observes the SG unit are not returning fire as Daniel suggests they might be SG11. Carter reminds him "They were declared MIA 8 months ago on P89534. What would they be doing here?" Teal’c points out they are about to die. Jack tries repeatedly to contact the unit on his radio but receives no response as the Jaffa draw closer to the SG team, still firing. Jack orders SG1 to advance to the tree line at the bottom of the ridge. Once there he and Daniel take cover behind a large boulder and for the rest of the scene Daniel idly points his 9mm pistol over his shoulder right at Jack’s head. Oblivious to this threat, Jack yells to the Unidentified SG Unit (USGU) to pull out. One of the young members of SG Cannon Fodder demands he identify himself. Jack shouts back "Colonel Jack O’Neill, SG1." to which talkative SG Guy responds "Which quadrant?" That one has Jack stumped and as he tries to figure out what the kid is talking about another of the USGU is killed by a staff weapon blast. Jack shouts "Get out of there!" whereupon the USGU leader orders, "Take ‘em out!" All around the team trap doors in the ground fly open and SG troops pop out and open fire on SG1. Their weapons look like regular machine guns but they fire little red balls of light. Carter is hit first and falls, then Teal’c, then Daniel. Finally Jack is shot a half a dozen times and slowly collapses to the ground. Not one of SG1 got a shot off and the USGU retreat, leaving the bodies of SG1 in the dirt.

In a tent filled with gear, pressurized gas tanks and storage containers the bodies of SG1 are laid out on gurneys or tables. They slowly awaken. "Everybody OK?" Jack asks "Headache. Bad headache" replies Daniel. Carter, who has a long cut on her face alongside her nose and mouth, looks around and comments "I thought I got shot." Teal’c agrees as Sam and Jack exchange a look (each checking that the other is OK?) "Must be some kind of stun weapon," Sam continues. "Looked liked MP-5’s to me." Jack points out. Carter nods, then makes a face as her headache reminds her that agreeing with Jack isn’t a good idea. One of the Young Guns bombs into the tent. Jack greets him politely. In gloating tones YG sneers "Boy are you guys gonna get it." Jack looks bemused at being thus addressed by someone in an SGC uniform and asks "Get what? From whom?" "You can’t talk!" squeaks YG, scandalized. "Why not?" Jack asks reasonably. "Because you’re dead!" replies Squeaky. Jack shoots Sam a look and echoes "Dead." "Pretending not to be dead will just get you in more trouble," Squeaky says pompously. "More trouble that dead." Jack says carefully. If he wasn’t having problems taking this situation seriously before, he is now. As Squeaky continues to pompously admonish them, Jack Sam and Daniel interject questions to try and discover exactly what is going on. Their continued insistence on talking flips Squeaky right out and he threatens to kill them. When Daniel asks "If we’re supposed to be dead, how are you supposed to kill us again?" Squeaky shrills "You want to find out four-eyes?" and levels his NotMP-5 at Daniel’s head. "Four-eyes," Daniel repeats, torn between terror and contempt. "Easy, big fella," Jack counsels him. "Just play dead." Deprived of a cooperative victim Squeaky snits that the Captain is waiting and they should follow him. He storms out. SG1 completely fails to trail along behind.

Jack hops off his table and takes a look around the tent as he asks if anyone noticed Squeaky’s unit patch. Carter replies "SG-X" and Teal’c points out there ain’t no such team. "Not under Hammond’s command." Jack replies grimly. Squeaky bursts back into the tent. I wonder how far across the camp he got before noticing there was no one behind him. "I SAID follow me," he whines and storms out again. Jack slowly turns and ambles out of the tent. The captain turns out to be a kid who is supposed to look about 17. He doesn’t even look up from his paperwork as he informs them, "You are all casualties until 1400 hrs." "Would that be standard or Daylight Savings?" Jack asks, visibly restraining himself from saying something nastier and probably louder. Captain Kid’s nostrils get all pinched as he spins around and gives them the no talking spiel, ending with "Is that CLEAR?" right in Jack’s face. Jack’s finally had enough. "I think Colonel is the proper way of addressing me, Captain." he drawls with heavy emphasis. Captain Kid launches into a speech about how "no rank is above strict adherence to the rules of engagement." and how, by interfering, SG1 ruined his war game. He quotes several rules and articles by number. Jack looks at Sam. "Carter, I’ve never been real big on regs. Is this familiar to you?" She says "No, sir."

Teal’c has heard of the rules Captain Kid is quoting. Looking straight at the kid he snarls "Kel vak Jaffa!" Captain Kid looks shocked. Jack looks like the penny just dropped. "You’re not from D Quadrant. You came through the Chappa’ai!" CK blurts. "This is a challenge!" "The Chappa’ai," Daniel repeats, looking confused. He hasn’t gotten it yet. Jack has though, and groans. Captain Kid and Squeaky misinterpret Jack’s groan and Daniel’s burbling. "He meant the Stargate, sir." Squeaky chimes in. "Stargate," Captain Kid repeats like it’s a word in a foreign language, "Of course." He grovel in shame for having "revealed [himself] and failed" and hands his pistol to Teal’c telling the "Master Jaffa’ he must "execute [him] for the remainder of the day." Jack looks at Teal’c. "Master Teal’c, might I suggest we spare them, this time?" "Very well . . . underling." Teal’c replies, garnering himself quite the dirty look from Jack. Captain Kid identifies himself with his ‘Earth name’ - Captain Kyle Rogers. Sam obviously hasn’t got the memo about playing it cool as she echoes "Earth name." Teal’c ignores her and demands to know "your standing orders given to you by your previous Jaffa master."

Apparently, the kids hang out playing war games awaiting the return of their Lord, Apophis. When they’re ready, he will come. "Don’t hold your breath," Jack says with some relish. Captain Kid misunderstands and insists they are ready to infiltrate the Tauri. They’ve "studied long and hard, and know much." For example, he knows "Corn and cotton are indigenous to North America." "That information could save your life one day," Jack agrees, all GI Joe ‘knowing is half the battle’. Sam's lips twitch convulsively as she looks at Jack. Teal’c tells Captain Kid it is not yet time to do the Infiltration Tango. Daniel, slowly getting up to speed, asks who the attacking Jaffa were from the morning. CK identifies them as some of his men, led by his second-in-command Captain Nelson.

Captain Kid: "Shall I have him sent for?"
Daniel: "No, I don’t think that will be necessary."
Teal’c: "Send for him."
Daniel: "Yes! Send for him!"

Squeaky is dispatched on this vital errand and CK asks how else he may serve. Jack wants their weapons back so CK leads the way to the armory tent. As they cross the camp again, Sam checks out the shirtless guys practicing hand-to-hand combat and remarks on the lack of symbiote pouches, i.e. they aren’t true Jaffa. Anyway, Teal’c says towards the end Apophis had almost no loyal Jaffa remaining so he conscripted humans as cannon fodder for his hopeless battles. Inside the armory tent Teal’c dismisses Captain Kyle and they start to search for their guns. The team move down the racks of guns flipping them over and checking the grips for the glowing red crystals the fake weapons have. Jack asks Teal’c how he knows about "these rules of engagement" "They are the code of battle during a young Jaffa’s training, spoken by Apophis himself." He says the guns are "Intar." "Short for?" Jack asks. "Intar," Teal’c replies. He says they are used for training, can only stun and can "take the form of any weapon."

Jack tells Daniel and Sam to keep looking and asks Teal’c if he can get the boy soldiers together in one place. Teal’c is all "no sweat" and off he and Jack go to see Captain Kyle. Teal’c gets the captain to use his vo’cume, a training instrument that will assemble the troops for inspection. CK comes out of his tent carrying a round softball-sized object on a tripod, sets it down in the middle of the camp and steps back. It activates and all of a sudden there is a 50 foot tall transparent Apophis standing there, commanding "Warriors of Apophis, assemble before me and listen to he that possesses the vo’cume." Sam and Daniel come belting out the armory to see what’s going on. "Just a huge, honkin’ Apophis, Major," Jack reassures Sam. "Nothing to worry about." As the HHA speaks the camp’s gently waving Stars & Stripes is visible through him. When it is done HHA dissolves into a shower of golden sparks and CK requests that Teal’c inspect the troops. Teal’c does so, but none of the weapons are SG1’s. He is introduced to Captain Nelson, who is dressed in full Jaffa armor. Jack diffidently asks Teal’c if he might address the troops Teal’c agrees and introduces him. "This is Colonel O’Neill. He is much loved by Apophis." Jack’s eyebrows shoot up and he turns to look at Teal’c. "Apophis wanted me to tell you that you’ve all been doing a wonderful job. Couldn’t ask for more. Well done. But he also wanted me to tell you that the whole invasion of the Tauri idea has been cancelled, due to . . . rain. So, the war games are officially over as of right now. " Rogers and Nelson both look as if Jack just cancelled Christmas, and although you’d think he would know what is sure to happen next, Teal’c neither shuts Jack up or contradicts him.

When no one reacts with shouts of joy Jack continues "You can all go home." To Nelson he says "It’s over. Tell your buddies to quit fighting." Nelson smells a rat and comments that Jack sounds "more like a Tauri than a warrior of Apophis" which Jack takes as a compliment. Nelson recites more rules and articles about not stopping ongoing battles for any reason. Finally Teal’c sees where this is headed and gives Jack an eyebrow. Sam reports she and Daniel have checked all the weapon in the tent and found 1 MP5 and 1 9mm. She figures some of the kids are playing war games armed with real guns. Teal’c tries one more time to get Capt. Rogers to recall his men but Kyle is sure it’s another test and refuses. Jack tells Teal’c to tell them the truth. "Apophis has been slain in battle." The kids are all "Pull the other one bucky." Capt. Kyle trots out the party line, insisting, "Apophis is a god, gods cannot die!"

The soldier boys all trot off back to their war game. Teal’c watching them go, murmurs "Apophis has lived for thousands of years. It is as if we have told them the sun will never rise again." "It just might not for some of those kids, if they don’t wise up." Jack replies flatly. Jack and Teal’c enter the armory tent to find Sam holding Squeaky at gun point. He snits that the games have started, he’s late and he needs a weapon. Sam doesn’t want to let him go because of the live weapons somewhere in the field. Jack decides to flog his deceased equine some more. "The game is cancelled." Squeaky isn’t having any of it so Jack takes the Intar Sam is holding and shoots Squeaky point blank. Jack tells everyone to grab a stun gun and they move out. The first body they come across in the field has a great smoking hole in his chest. "He’s dead, sir." Carter McCoys. Just then another staff weapon blast hits nearby sending them diving for cover. Somewhere along the line they picked up CK, because he’s suddenly beside Jack volunteering to draw the Jaffa’s fire. "Negative, that is a REAL weapon." Jack snarls. "Apophis will protect me," CK chirps and goes tearing off. Anyway, CK takes a blast to the abdomen for his trouble as Jack tags the Jaffa with his Intar. Daniel rushes over to CK who’s shocky and obviously dying. When CK sees the blood from his wound he smiles suddenly. "This is the final challenge," he tells Nelson the Jaffa who has come running over. Roger shoves his hand into CK’s wound and redundantly observes, "Blood has been shed." Kyle is all happy as he orders Nelson. "Prepare the men, the challenge must begin at first light." Nelson books.

Teal’c explains the final challenge is the last stage of a warrior’s training, "When the games becomes real." Jack groans. Back at the camp the boy soldiers are running everywhere making preparations. Everyone is in full SGC field battle uniforms. Carter reports all of SG1’s weapons were turned in after the wargames so O’Neill orders her to keep them secure. In the medical tent Daniel is watching some guy bandage up Capt. Kyle. Jack asks how he’s doing. Norman replies "Apophis will save him" Daniel points out that’s not going to happen and says Kyle will die without proper medical attention. Nelson says taking Kyle off planet is a no-go: the rules of engagement forbid anyone leaving until after the Final Challenge. Jack is completely unsurprised. Kyle’s all "I don’t want an exception made for little ol’ me.’ Suddenly Daniel gets inspired. "What if I told you we were bringing you to see Apophis personally? To show him that blood has shed and your quadrant is truly ready for his return? If we don’t bring you back with us then Apophis will know you’ve failed our challenge and never return." Kyle and Nelson look horrified at this bombshell and fall for it completely. Kyle nobly agrees to go.

Back at the SGC Teal’c and Daniel come through the gate carrying Kyle on a stretcher. Sam and Jack are right behind them, and as soon as they are through Jack shouts for a medical team. As Kyle, who is looking pretty confused and freaked, is loaded onto a gurney, General Hammond comes over and demands, "What’s happened, Colonel?" "My lord?" squeaks Kyle. "Actually we just call him General Hammond." Jack drawls. Kyle shrieks "Where’s Apophis?" "He’s not here, sorry." Jack answers. I guess Daniel’s burst of creativity didn’t rub off. Kyle immediately starts to thrash, flail and scream "Liars, traitors! He will strike you down. You will all DIE!". Dr Fraiser wants to know who the raving looney is. Jack tells her his name is Rogers and he’s not SGC. Doctor Fraiser doesn’t seem to need more info as she and the med team rush off to the infirmary. Hammond isn’t so easily satisfied. Staring at Kyle’s retreating, still shrieking form he tells the team he wants to debrief immediately. "Yes, my lord," Jack says obediently.

In the conference room Teal’c explains the Final Challenge for Hammond’s benefit. Briefly, everyone gets given real weapons and they blast the hell out of each other until one side is completely wiped out. Those still standing go to work for Apophis. Carter is shocked that Apophis would want them to kill each other. Jack doesn’t look the least bit surprised. He observes the kids don’t have lethal weapons but Teal’c points out "They are most resourceful, and determined." Basically, everyone concludes ‘where there’s a will, there’s a way.’ Sam declares they "have to go back there and prevent this from happening." Daniel backs her up. Hammond nixes anyone going back until they know what they’ll find. Jack volunteers to talk to CK.

In the infirmary Dr. Frasier tells Jack Kyle isn’t eating or speaking, "except to call me a sholva." "You must be doing a good job," Jack smirks. Jack wanders over to Kyle’s bed carrying the kid’s lunch tray, puts it down and starts eating the sandwich. "Doc Fraiser says you haven’t been eating," he comments with his mouth full. "It’s poison," Kyle whines. "It’s hospital food. Of course it is." Jack shoots back. More chewing, then "Mmm, tuuuna" Jack Homers. Never having seen the Simpsons Kyle is unamused. "I will reveal nothing. You may begin torturing me." You can tell he has been saving that line and practicing it in his head. "Oh I’ve already begun. This is the infamous tuna torture." Jack waves the other half of the sandwich under Kyle’s nose. The kid finally realizes he is being mocked, grabs the sandwich and starts to eat. Jack tries one more time to convince Kyle Apophis won’t be needing a personal guard - being dead and all - finishing with "What if he told you himself?" "If Apophis can speak then he cannot be dead," Kyle says, all You can’t fool me. Jack just stares at him like ‘Wanna bet?’ Daniel and Teal’c are setting up a VCR and monitor next to Kyle’s bed. Sam and Daniel fill Kyle in on how Apophis got captured, tortured, escaped, took sanctuary on Earth and died. Kyle just keeps repeating "Gods cannot die" really smugly so Daniel starts the tape. There’s Apophis, looking about 112 years old begging for a host and confessing he’s afraid. Then he gasps and dies. Kyle looks like he wants to throw up and run screaming from the room. When Jack and Teal’c confirm they were there, Kyle caves and accepts the truth.

Jack assures him the war is over and everyone can go home. Kyle disagrees. He sounds anguished and heartbroken "Tomorrow the final challenge begins and many of my men will die. For him." In the conference room Kyle explains how he and his men were brought to the training camp, told to worship Apophis, trained by Jaffa and learned about Earth from captured tortured members of SG11 who were eventually executed. "Then our Jaffa masters began to leave us, one by one. They said to help Apophis win a great battle. And then we were alone." Their last Jaffa showed Kyle and Nelson a cave full of real MP-5’s to be used for the challenge, so the battle will go ahead. Kyle wants the SGC to let him return to his men and try to stop them from killing each other. Daniel tries to tell Kyle to do so would be pointless but luckily the Inspiration Fairy has whacked Carter on the noggin this time. "Col. O’Neill’s already thought of the solution. I think you know where I’m going with this, sir." Jack looks blank. Carter wants to transfer their tape of Apophis onto the vo’cume and show it to all the boy soldiers. Teal’c thinks it could work. Hammond wants to how they’ll get into the camp alive. Jack points out they’ve got all these Intars, "We’ll shoot first and ask questions later," Jack says gleefully. Hammond OK’s this vague plan. On the way to the Gate Room the team is suited up in camouflage gear and make up. They are running the plan one more time. One heavily armed SG squad is guarding the camp and all the other soldiers, led by Nelson will attack it. SG1 will take out and replace the defenders to buy Carter enough time to reprogram the vo’cume.

Jack: "Is everyone clear on that? Daniel?"
Daniel: "What?"
Jack: "Good."

And off they go. Back on the planet SG1 are creeping through the foliage ducking gunfire. They get pinned down by two boy soldiers, so Kyle leaps up and runs to a new position to draw fire. Jack and Sam take out the two kids and Jack stomp over to Kyle

Jack: "I told you to stay with Carter!"
Kyle: "I was just trying to draw their fire."
Jack: "You listen to every word I say and you will do everything I say or I will shoot you myself! IS THAT CLEAR?"

Jack smacks Kyle upside his head and stalks off. At the encampment the elite SG team on guard duty are wandering vacantly about and SG1 has had no trouble infiltrating the perimeter. Kyle stomps into the middle of the camp and shouts "Status report soldier!" While everyone stands around gaping at him little red balls of light strike each of the defenders and they are down for the count. Jack sends Kyle to get the ‘vacuum’ Teal’c and Carter start start reprogramming the vo’cume just as the attacking SG teams appear. At first SG1 and the boy soldiers are pretty evenly matched but then the first mortar round (Kyle forgot to mention them, and the Stingers and M-60’s and M-72’s) and things start to go pretty badly. Bullets are flying everywhere and bits of the camp explode as Carter bolts from the tent holding the new and improved vo’cume. She activates it and HHA appears to deliver his ‘assemble before me’ spiel. Everyone freezes for a second, then the boy soldiers lower their guns and approach the camp. By-The-Book Nelson starts in about using the vo’cume during battle being against the rules of engagement. Just then the HHA dissolves into Apophis on his deathbed, begging, pleading and dying. All the kids look horrified and lost, and accept the images as truth immediately. Such trusting souls they are. Nelson whispers, "What will become of us? Where will we go now?" Kyle answers, "Home."

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