Let me guess, you picked out yet another colorful box with a crank that I'm expected to turn and turn until OOP! big shock, a jack pops out and you laugh and the kids laugh and the dog laughs and I die a little inside.
it was a windy friday evening, the leaves were floating to and from as Alan
was walkin home from school. Alan has encountered many problems in his life such
as his periods and his unfortunate likin to ashlee simpson, but this culd not
prepare him for what was just about to happen on that windy..friday evening.
Alan strangely took a different route home. He was in the mood for adventure,
excitement and he did not get this by following a routine. He then followed an
alley way that ended at a spooky looking house in which the attic light was on.
"oooOOO spooky!" Alan said to himself. Alan then walked away from the spooky
house. he soon found his was home and discovered that he was locked out
from his recent shock of realising he was locked out alan fainted and woke up 3
hrs later in the spooky houses attic, alan being suprised and all still managed
to ask...where is my front door, and right after he said that, a lonely little
old lady said from the darkness..i want to kiss you. Alan replied with..um do i
know you? and she said..oh baby it was a wonderful day on the station and i was
the hobo lady you adored, Alan then freeked out and called her a stalker and he
tried to escape but the sly old lady had bolted the doors shut and alan had
nowhere to go, she then demanded alan to strip down and wait for her
commands..after 4 minutes and 36 seconds of thinking up these devious commands
she finally told alan..
"In order to obtain for your house key and the ticket out of this hell hole you
will have to kill all of those in which you love". The old lady then laughed
evily. Alan was still butt naked and looked puzzled as he thought the old lady
had a fetish for naked teenages. she then explained that she had a fetish for
teenage girls and asked Alan if he would ask his female friends iof they were
interested. Alan recommended Susan.
''yes susan'' alan said she is a teenage girl with the height of a 6 year old, i
think you will endulge yourself quite good with that little female. ok the old
lady said but you have to bring her in a police outfit..ive been a bad old lady
said the old lady very seductively. alan said..''ok..u trash slut fuck bag..''
the old lady replied with ''thank you sweetie now BE GONE'' and threw alan out
of the window, luckily he landed in a pile of enormously large poopie. ignorin
the stench of the poo on his face mainly he set off to find susan. it was a long
vigorous journey, travelling thru 4 LONG disturbing streets, each with its own
challenges but alan conquered them and he arrived at susans. he rang the
doorbell and to his horror..
susans pimp (dad) answered. "What!" he said. Alan asked if Susan was avaliable
to come out and "play". Susan's pimp then said "Sure, $2 an hour!" alan then
brought susan to the old ladys house. there he told Susan to stay perfectly
still as he answered the door. he rang the doorbell not once not twice but
thrice and ran off into the distance leaving Susan at the doorway. "Yes my
child" the old lady said. "$2 an hour missy" Susan replied
2 dollars?!?! i can buy myself 3 teenage girls with that kind of money!! susan
replied with..well hunny you cant buy a girl who can pleasure you in more then
48 ways and im that only girl so pay up hoe! and so the old lady payed and she
took susan in and told her to dress in this police uniform..susan did and
started ''punishing'' the old lady. after days of sexual pleasure the old lady
said ''susan dear, im jsut wondering if you have any diseases of any sort''
susan then said ''well little old lady..we will find out wont we'' and she then
walked off into the sunset, meanwhile back at alans house , alan stil culdnt get
in the house and none of what he went through had helped him accomplish to get
in his house, in a rage of fury alan slapped the door and with his astonishment
the door opened alan realised that when he fainted and before he woke up at that
ladies house, he must of somehow unlocked the door with the key he found in his
pocket!!, now ladies and gentleman this goes to show, dont trust a little old
hobo lady who likes 2 kiss young boys and get spanked by young dirty susans
¶ David and Caillan