Newbie Welcome Poem

by Jelliebun

(Janice McCready May)

To the Newbies

Hello, darling newbies
We're glad you are here
We're so glad to meet you
Delurk with good cheer!

We welcome you now
To this land strange and fun
Get ready for wuzzles
From bear and from bun

We're happy to see you
We want to be pals
We don't really care
If you're guys or you're gals

We hope you can stay
And we hope you'll take part
But first a few words
That come straight from the heart.

The royals are special
But don't enforce rules
They're just here to play
On this grand ship of fools

They'll answer your questions
They could be your friends
But when they slip up
Like the rest, make amends

We're human beans first
And then Duck, Bun and Bear
But whoever you are
Be assured that we care

Sometimes we get heated
Our words may seem rough
But please don't start flaming
Or leave in a huff

Just send us a note
Say the words were weren't good
It could just well be
That we're misunderstood

If we can keep talking
There's no need to flame
To say nasty words
Or to hand out the blame

Sometimes you'll see posts
That are not very neat
Dead Christians, Fast Money
And Girls you can Meet

The answer to these
Is quite short and quite sweet,
Please press, very firmly
The key marked "delete"

And now, Gentle newbie
I bid you godspeed
And please let us know
If there's something you need

We'll give you mass cuddles
We'll help you have fun
We hope that your time here
Will not soon be done!

Love,
Jelliebun