THE NAP QUEEN by Jon Melusky
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|....\....\.|
`\___|\____\| othing gained and nothing lost was the __
writing on the bed. (__)
[]
It had been there since before she was born. []
The wispery cursive was daintily .------, []
engraved into the _( )[]
steel bed. .'`^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^))\`.----'`[]
{ ~ - ~~ ~ ~ - ~~ - ~ - (( | | []
She looked at the { )) | | []
words until a { ((__|_|-----[]
passing relative { )) []
questioned her about `~~~[]~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~'-' []
wasting time. (__) (__)
"Ehhhhhhh, Erin."
reproached the unnumbered cousin. Erin pivoted rigidly and mentally
numbered that face #34.4 and left the room with swishing socks.
Cousin #34.4 had a longer name but Erin had such pull with the King that
all cousins were to be named "Hey You." Secretly all the kin knew that
Queen Erin wanted them to have numbers for names but the King traded a
bowl of oatmeal and two hot teas in exchange for leniency.
.---------------. ) (
:.@@%%%%%%%%%%@@@.: ( )
| ``````````````` | ._____,_ ._____._
| | | |D) | |D)
\ / | |' | |'
`.___________.' '-----' '-----'
The quote on the perfectly powerful steel bed was widely modified in
that year 8734.25 (Lack of Leniency .25).
_, _, [[You see Dear Reader, that the years used to be counted using
\ \ \ \ nondecimals but that was before you arrived. Also steel beds
\ \ \ \ and socks were not in vogue before 8734. So basically you
)<) )<) are guessing where the plot is going? Well, please don't.
/_/ /_/ I am not a lenient narrator and wish you to be still in
'-' '-' that area of your brain. Thank you.]]
So the queen swished out into the hallway and bumped w*W*W*W*w
into a sculpture of the king. Luckily the sculpture \"."."/
was not in any sword fighting pose so she was not //`\\
injured. Luckily she had bumped into it before so (/a a\)
she knew how to do the back flip required. Luckily (\_-_/)
the sculpture was not currently being cleaned at that .-~'='~-.
moment or the queen would've surely frightened the /`~`"Y"`~`\
zinglezongas out of the cleaning people.
As it was the flip was flawless and the post-comment was downright
illegal! The cleaning people were in the queen's mind also. No one
had heard her request. A rogue tear broke out of prison and she
calmly put the tear on the sculpture. As the queen swished like sand
into the next hallway, the tear slid down the face on the kingly steel
and landed on the steel book in its lap.
_
/_/_ .'''.
=O(_)))) ...' `.
\_\ `. .'''._.'
`--'
Zooming close, a bee investigates the noise of water dripping. The bee has
not drank water in 2 days of being stuck in the house. The Leniency Age has
not been good to the insect world. This bee drinks the tear gladly and is
renewed with hope.
Ever since bees and bugs of all sorts have been relegated to gardens
only, have the bees gained in the magical power to rival royalty. In fact
this bee sort of became sentient after drinking the salty reservoir.
_ ___ [[Dear Reader, yes of course this is a coincidence that I
\.\'.\ happened to be writing this story close enough to the
\'\.'\ queen without her seeing me. You see I am that bee.
\.\:/_// Now I am older and would like to complete this chapter
{{{{{(__(") of my memoirs. Now if you don't mind, I'll continue.
`~~~~ >>>^ Of course you don't mind because I can read minds as
you have already guessed. You are a good guesser,
aren't you? But not good enough to know where this story is
going, unless this isn't the first time you're reading this.
Ohhhh bother! Back to the story!]]
So the young fasting bee is recharged and charges after the queen. She
makes a beeline for the garden and tweaks her ankle on a root. The
gardener sees the poetic front roll and kip up. The gardener yawns and
clips a vine in a merciful way. She sort of hoped she might be the first
to see the queen fall and bonk her skull. The only person that ever had
a chance to be lenient to her majesty, was the king. A promotion
would look mighty fine since she was low on the list.
_
_(_)_ wWWWw _
@@@@ (_)@(_) vVVVv _ @@@@ (___) _(_)_
@@()@@ wWWWw (_)\ (___) _(_)_ @@()@@ Y (_)@(_)
@@@@ (___) `|/ Y (_)@(_) @@@@ \|/ (_)\
/ Y \| \|/ /(_) \| |/ |
\ | \ |/ | / \ | / \|/ |/ \| \|/
jgs \\|// \\|/// \\\|//\\\|/// \|/// \\\|// \\|// \\\|//
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
They both started to chat and the queen gave 7.71 lenient comments and
Fen, the gardener gave 0.1 lenient comments. At the end of the chat, Fen
got promoted up two steps in the gardening ladder. Fen was so happy! Now she
would get a 4 PINECONE patch! Fen had tilted her head just right and seen
a tear tracer line on the queen's cheerful cheek. Fen had made the most
lenient badinage she could muster.
Erin took it well and had Fen wash her clothes in the brook nearby. Fen
was in total awe and joy .\^/. as the queen waded into the pool upstream.
The wind slowly increased . |`|/| . as Fen was about done. Most of the
queen's clothes were |\|\|'|/| orange and then more orange leaves
began to tumble and .--'-\`|/-''--. flip down. One small maple leaf
rested on Erin's cheek. \`-._\|./.-'/ She moved the leaf over to the
shoulder and wished >`-._|/.-'< for an organic tattoo to form there.
Another leaf landed `~|/~~|~~\|~' on her thigh. She wished for a
tattoo there also. The /_\ queen dreamt about the economic
impact of organic tattoos for her realm. The idea was fluttering as she
fluttered six laps in the pool.
The queen knew she had cried because she had made naps unlawful. In haste
( she had created that bill and the king co-signed it when he was
(_) under a daze of overwork. She tried to create an antilaw later
but didn't want to admit foolishness while she was in charge
) of the Military Summit. She hated wasting paper also but maybe
(_) this would be the exception of the year.
) Fen stared at the stream for a good twenty minutes solid.
(_) She was watching for the tears of a queen. They were in
microscopic amounts but they were there! Fen drank from the
water like she always did but in her heart she would rename
( the stream "Queen's Tears" only at the queen's eulogy.
(_) She rose and placed the final clothes on the line and went
to study her new job responsibilities. She wanted to see
Queen Erin clean of passed tears so she walked past the
( quiet pool and saw leaves on a napping queen. Fen fainted and
(_) bonked her skull on a root.
When the fuzzy vision became less so, Fen saw and heard a man singing
over her. He was sewing also. She said, "Huh?" He said, "I am sewing
a 12 PINE CONE patch to your gown." Fen rolled her eyes and whispered,
"I need a wish." The man named Bog, who was also a 12 PINE CONE patch
person, smiled and whispered, "The wishing bee is buzzing in your ear
and waiting for you to whisper the words."
//
The King Ryan and Queen Erin came into view and _//
Fen wanted to be a rabbit and burrow into the (')---.
fur protection of a warren! _/-_( )o
"Ummmm, I wish we could all live happily ever after."
"Great wish", grinned the bee and so it was that organic tattoos were
always worn by the queen and the economic windfall of tattoos was
balanced by the loss of gardening confidence with other countries.
~Finis~
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Crown of Queen Erin & King Ryan.
by Jon Melusky.