Wednesday, Jan 5, 2000
2:20p
Well, it came it went.
About 10:15 or so last Friday evening, I had had enough of the tv and the fireworks, most of the coverage was talk, crowds and outside partys by then. I drove up to the top of Glassy, actually went by the old homeplace on the way, there was a huge earthmover park in front where we use to park the cars, it made the house look even smaller. I drove on by and went to Glassy, got up there and there were two REA trucks parked on the top knoll, guess they were part of the stand-by, emergency, y2k glitch thing, thought about asking them but I never did. I just walked around the road and back down to the place where I use to sit on the East side. Stood around and looked around and listened to the occassional firework. Walked back up toward the truck, smoked a cig and looked around at the lights. Then I left. Drove through town and back home.
It was about 11:00 when I got back, turned on the tv and it was all the same, waiting around for that ball to drop. I wasn't going to sit there in front of the tv, no way. I got a couple of sticks that I had been using to tapp along with some of the music and dancing in Australia, went outside and walked around and stood around the driveway, and the campfire ring. So that's what I did when the local midnight zenith passed over, stood at the top of the driveway and beat sticks together.
I went on to bed, didn't stay up for anymore, the rest of the world could celebrate without me.
It was after 7:00 when I woke up, still dawnish outside, I step out onto the back porch to take a look-see at the frist dawn. There was a russling of brush and leaves out back up near the old horse shed, it was a couple of deer. They hopped and jumped on up into the woods, about all I could make out was the long white tail sticking up. So that was the first wildlife I saw for this 2000 year.
Mom called mid-morning, she looked for blackeye peas and couldn't find any. The last time I was at the store I picked up the hog jowls and collard greens, I thought there were peas already at her house. I went by the store on the way over to her house, got the last can on the shelf at the store by the creek, drove up to the store on the otherside of town, got the last can on the shelf there. We had a typical new year day, Rose parade and eat lunch, phone call from Daniel. I came back home and rested some then went back over to there. Aunt Leander and her family was there and we sat around and talked. They left, Mom and I ate supper, watched some tv and then I came back home.
Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday ... it was all back to a normal new year time, it doesn't really feel much different other than knowing it's 2000.
Most of those days I've been writing stuff about the Confederate Flag thing. I know it's mostly just another news and political hyped up issue. Yet it still troubles me and I shouldn't let it. I think it's really the un-reasonability and un-sensibility of the whole thing that bothers me. Politicians, special interest groups, news media all making much ado about ... well not about nothing, but about a flag symbol. Maybe it all has to do with the genealogy and history work I've done the pass few years. My mind in still in the 1800's, I've read the newspapers of those times, how all us poor common folk lived before, during and after the war. And it was all of us, poor white folk and poor black folk all just trying to survive.
The news media, and other powers that be, made much ado about y2k and Zero hour, nothing much happened. It's always been just that, almost. The news media, and other powers that were, made much ado about slavery, states rights, economic oppression and it brought about war. The same happened many times in Europe with the serfs, peasants, indentured servants. Now it's that Confederate Flag thing, creating an issue where there should be none at all. In another 135, 500, 1000 years it'll still be those news media, and other powers that be, make much ado about something and create nothing but hardships on us poor common folk.
Friday, Jan 7, 2000
8:35a
What's the usefulness of this? At four square feet, 2 ft x 2 ft square, per person the population of the world could stand within a 30 mile by 30 mile square. [SQRT(6,000,000,000) x 2 / 5,280].
A. Lonehawk is bored. B. Lonehawk knows arithmetic and how to solve an area problem. C. There's a really large number of people in the world. D. Lonehawk could stand on top of Glassy Mt and look at all the people. E. Everyone could stand around and talk with each other and be friendly. F. There's a really large area of the planet not being used. G. We need to do away with citys and spread out more.
I had been smelling gas fumes, since mid December, in the mornings when I'd warm up the truck. I finally checked it the last week of that month, the fuel pumped looked like it was leaking. I went up to the auto parts store to get a new one, that was the Thursday before New Year day. No one had the part and it had to be ordered. It came in the next day, I had expected it to be after the weekend before it got here, or not at all since it could have been out of stock, it's one of rare model engines.
So anyway I'd been driving around sort-of waiting for the weather to be half nice to be out and replace it. Yeah, I decided to try and do it myself, it at least looked like I could. That's how I spent yesterday afternoon, taking parts off the engine, carborater cover, distributer cap, vacum hose mounts. I actually got it down to where I could almost but not quite get the pump out. The bottom part of the distributer was in the way, and I didn't like the looks of what it would take to get that part off, end up messing up the timing or something. Why do I even try?
So I put everything back together. Tallying up things: lost a bolt that clamps some tubing in place, now I got find a replacement for that; a length of vaccum hose came off, I know where one end goes but not the other; spent most of the time looking for and retrieving clamps and bolts; the gas hose to the pump didn't have a clamp so I got a new one, that may have helped some but it still leaks.
Oh well, at least it still cranks and runs. And I keep driving down the road expecting it to just quit on me anytime.
4:35a
It's really just the general insanity in the world, very little makes any common sense anymore, and there's nothing to do except sit and watch it all happen.
It's reprocessed, de-radiated, recycled nuclear reactor parts with residual radioactivity less than some food products. But does the news media report that? No. They hype up the "it was part of a reactor part."
Genetically modified foods, it's the same thing, it's safe but it's man made recombinate DNA, so they hype that up.
Thursday, Jan 13, 2000
9:10a
Went for a ride, the go sit in front of Table Rock ride, yesterday afternoon. Saw one eagle, hawk or falcon being chased by a group of crows (murder of crows?). There was another eagle, hawk, or falcon sitting in on of the trees in the mowed field. It flew around from one tree to another and then another while I was there. Then it flew off.
Talked with one of my brothers over the internet this morning. He was online when I got on to send out some email. He's had that flu and couldnt sleep, it was early early morning hours there. We had a good talk, or is it type?
The last couple of days I finished up a story that I started a couple of months ago. It's in the Short, Short, Story section off the Mainroom. Or here.
It's been nice and warm since last time I wrote. Still haven't got out and made good use of it though. I did open up the doors and window to air out the house a couple of afternoons. I sat out on the back porch and wittled on the two sticks I'm using for tapping together to make noise. I've got a percussion phase going now, that's like the on again off again guitar phase. I think it's just a a muscian wanna be thing even though I'll never keep up a beat.
Seems like more stuff has been going on since last Friday's entry, but it's faded away from memory now. Maybe it's just the a little more activity in the same ole routine.
3:00p
tap tap tap tap tap tap-tap ... tap tap tap tap tap tap-tap ... I just don't got that rythem, don't even got the beat. It takes some sort of inner sense of how it's all suppose to sound. I just don't got it.
I walked down to the campfire ring by the driveway, took my tapping sticks with me, along with my walking shaft. Sat on one of the rocks down there like I use to a long time ago. I have no idea how long that unopened beer can has been there either, more than 3 or 4 winters, or ever how long it's been since I had a fire there. Sat there and tapped away with my sticks. tap tap tap click click click thump thump thump. There were some fleeting feelings of how it felt to sit there in the past. But I just couldn't hang on to them.
Follow the money, follow the profit, follow the greed factor. That's all there is to it. More and more that's what I see. We live in a capitalist society, Ferringean, rules of acquisition, where's the profit.
There's nothing else to do, really, deep down I know it. There's nothing else to do except sit by the campfire ring, speculate and guess, watch the catastrophic civilization collaspe. It's kinda like driving on wet roads and loosing it hydroplaning. You can turn the wheels one way or the other but nothing happens. Stomp on the brakes, nothing. There's nothing else to do but go for the ride, speculate what and where you're going to crash, wonder how bad it's going to be, pondering about if you've got your religious beliefs right.
Somewhere out in the warmer waters of oceans, there is a group of Amebean legal types floating around among the plankton. They're drafting up legal papers to deny any ancestorial relationship and responsiblity for being associated with the human race. I think it's to cover their butts from any law suits by the rest of the universe.
Saturday, Jan 15, 2000
4:15p
This will probably be just a hello - goodbye. I'm really just doing the time till worktime. My brothers and I have been doing instant message type chat the pass few days. One of the decide to *upgrade* his life and move into the 21st century, he got a computer and internet connection. My first computer was a commadore machine, PET something, Personal Electronic Translator, that was about 1979. I was one of a 100,000 personal computer owners then. It was kind-of a loner-hacker type thing then, now I'm just a loner lost among the 100 millions.
The *printer* I got with that setup was actually a Selecto typewriter converted into a computer terminal. I used it for some dial-up timesharing systems back then, well, it was the GE Timesharing the Singer company did business with. It was a backordered item, I kept calling the mail order company I got the computer from about when it would get here. I was over at my house doing some painting outside when the phone rang. I think this is the way it was, it was a taxi driver asking for directions and I told him how to get to Mom's house. Then I took off over there to and waited. He drove up later, had the package in the passenger seat, he picked it up at the airport and drove it to Pickens. I guess the mailorder house were kind teed off at me and made sure it got here from the airport as quickly as it arrived there.
Oh well. Time's up.
Sunday, Jan 16, 2000
4:00p
It's actually almost a repeat of yesterday's entry, just doing the time till worktime again.
Saw a hawk in the woods back up Gravely road. It was flying alongside the car for a few seconds, up in the trees not in the roadway.
I'm taking the truck to the neighborhood mechanic tomorrow morning. After lunch I drove my truck back home and Mom came to pick me up, rode back to her house. Then I took the car and drove down to the store by the creek to get the milk I forgot to get when I got our lunch, stopped by her house again, then came home. So all the car swapping is done. I just have to drive the truck over to the garage in the morning and get a ride back to the house.
I thought I'd drive the car to work tonight, but I decided not to. I have the vehicles arranged so I won't have to move them both in the morning, just the truck. I wonder after all of this if he will get the fuel pump on before work tomorrow, I think he might. It'll mean I didn't really have to bother Mom about borrowing her car.
It's two weeks into the year now. I always feel like I should be doing something, but that's become such the norm now. Next week will come and go. I'll feel like I haven't really tryed to get anything important done. Then it's down hill through another year.
It has something to do with letting those little bags of trash pile up in the kitchen by the door. I see them all the time, every day, it just becomes normal. I'd think they need to be hauled off to the recycle place, but I never do. That goes on for a month or so, then I'll load them in the truck and go to the recycle place. There's always something what needs to be done, around the house and in my life. But it's all gone on for so long now without being done it's just the norm.
Monday, Jan 17, 2000
3:50p
Drove the truck over to the neighborhood mechanic this morning, it was a little before 8, I think. There was one man already there, we stood around and talked a little. Or it's more like I tried to make conversion, he didn't seem to want to talk much. Another man showed up a little later, it was much the same and I just ended up standing around and looking around. Lamar the mechanic wouldn't be there till about 9 so I finally decided to just walk on back home. That's what I did, walk a mile or so back home in the brisk air, it was about 35 then.
I laid back down for the 60 minute semi-comatose state. Then I got that MetLife form out and signed it, that's something about them changing from a mutual fund to stock type company. Went up town to mail it and was going to stop by the service station to put air in the tires on Mom's car. I had forgotten to get quarters for the air machine, that's 50 cents now. So I drove back home and then back to the service station. The air pressure was down in the 20s on her car. I finished doing that task and went on over to her house and ate lunch like the usual routine. Came back home and laid down again.
After getting back up I drove over the the garage to see how things were progressing there. The truck was parked in the usual place where finished work is parked. I talked with Lamar and he said what and all he did to get the fuel pump out and new one back in. Took one of the mounting studs off, got the motor turned over so the pump cam was in the right place and other such stuff. So anyway, it's drive over to Mom's, ride back to the gargage, she goes on back to her house, I drive back over that way too just to make sure she got back ok.
Sort-of knew yesterday after all the car and truck moving around it would end up being unneccessary. I could have drove it over to the garage and walk home, stay home at lunch time, walk back to the garage and get the truck. Wouldn't have had to bother mom with the car at all.
The King holiday and anti-flag thing is going on down at Columbia today. The noon news was estimating 50,000 for it, not sure how many are there for the King holiday and how many for the anti-flag thing. It's already started with the Georgia flag now too. I really thought that would happen later, after the battle flag thing was decided. It's all become a presidential campaign issue as well.
To paraphase part of King's "I have a dream" speech: "I have a dream when people will not be judged by the emblems they wear or the flags they fly but by the strength of their character, their actions and words when using their emblems." We've apparently gotten past the color of the skin and race thing and now it's on to who finds what offense in each other's symbols. Or, are we still looking back 150+ years to who did what to each other's ancestors?
Then again, somewhere in the Biblical teachings there's "Judge not least you also be judged." Maybe we all best just keep our mouths shut. It's starting to sound too much like the youth gang and turf wars out in Los Angeles, wearing the wrong colors on the wrong turf at the wrong times.
Wednesday, Jan 19, 2000
4:00p
Waiting for worktime again. I use to do this entry writing in the early morning hours after I woke up early.
What Deep Thought bit of wisdom can I write about today? What have I learned in recent days? ... long pause ... Nothing is forthcoming. Read this instead.
Friday, Jan 21, 2000
3:55p
I hope I've got all that out of my head now. Besides, it'll be the usual hyped up news media and politicing event from now on. For the next 5 to 10 years, Georgia then Mississippi then it'll be something else. What a way to end/begin the century.
It's gotten cold here, upper teens during the night, mid-forties during the day, probably cold rain, freezing rain, sleet tomorrow night and Sunday morning. Winter time, cabin fever blues. There'll be frost on the truck windows by the time I get off this evening.
It's much like the previous new years, 3 weeks already, ha, should just copy and paste previous January entries here.
Watched some of the lunar eclispe last night, just stepped out on the back porch every ten or fifteen minutes, then back in here. I was instant messaging (iming, it'll be a legit word before too long) my brothers, one of the rare times we're all online at the same time. So it wwould type some, go look at the moon, come back and type some more. I went out about 10:30 the last time, it was half covered, stood around in the driveway looking up through the bare tree limbs at the moon. It was already freezing then and windy so I didn't stay out long, came back in and went on to bed. I don't remember the last time I saw, or stayed up to see, the total part. It was a long time ago.
My mind is too easy to latch on to a line of thinking and get stuck there. Same thoughts, same topic, going around and around. I'll lay on the couch and try to relax some, that 60 minutes semi-comatose state, and that's what my mind will do, think about one specific thing. Arguing, debating, reasoning one side of the topic against the other. I don't know if it's some obsession, determination to find some solution, the logically right answer, searching for some fundamental principle in an event or life.
It's just getting to be too much. I really need to find, no, I already got lots of things that need doing, I just need to do them. More activity, more of anything but this.
How long has it been since you did the addition tables in your head? 0 + 1 is 1, 1 + 1 is 2, 2 + 1 is 3, ... 7 + 9 is 16, 8 + 9 is 17, 9 + 9 is 18. Try it. Betcha you'll find yourself actually having to think about. Then there's the subtraction, multiplication and division tables. Ouch, that hurt my head.
Monday, Jan 24, 2000
3:45p
Saturday. The snow, sleet, ice is suppose to start this afternoon. Did the morning clothes washing. Went back down to the hardware store by the creek and bought a propane tank along with the propane. Brought it back to my house and put that burner on it that I bought a couple of seasons ago. Set it up on the back porch and burned it for a short while. Then I went over to mom's for lunch and watched the weather reports come in. Spent that early afternoon tossing stuff in plastic bags, clothes, blankets, head towel. I did wonder about leaving the electric heat on or not, sometimes they don't cut on and off like they're suppose to. I decide to leave them on, I normally do when I'm gone for a few hours anyway. Loaded up the truck with all that and the tank and went back to mom's.
The snow started while I was getting all that ready and it went on the rest of the day and evening. I didn't spent much time there till I decided to go back home and turn the heat off, so it's another trip to my house and back. Spent some time messing with that old kerosine heater, poured fuel into it's tank, after de-icing the nozzle it had frozen up from sitting out in the weather. The wick looked really dirty and dusty, tried cleaning that up but lost one of the screws down in the heater. So I end up setting it back out on the porch.
Even though I had the propane tank there, I dreaded using it in the house, didn't even like seeing it sit out on the carport stoop. It's always bad to have to use something you're not all that familar with. Kerosine smells when it burns, I guess propane would do the same. And there's always having to ventilate for fresh air.
We just sat around and watched tv, ate supper and watch more tv. I move my stuff into the front bedroom and fix the bed with all the blankets in the closet. Seems like I spent more time wondering and worrying about what was coming, how bad will it be, how long will the power be off, generally just everything that might go wrong. I really didn't sleep well, wake up, think, wake up, think, wake up, think.
Sunday morning came and the power stayed on during the night. It did flicker some that morning. Didn't do much except sit around, watch news, go outside occassionally and sit in the truck and smoke, made some pictures. Mom fixed lunch early, in case the power went out later. I did eat more lunch then than the day before. After lunch I went back to the bedroom and laid down, like I usually do at home. About mid-afternoon I call the pizza place but no one answered, then I called the owner to find out if he was going to open that night, he said the manager was and she had tried calling my house.
I walked out the road to the Ridge road and it all looked wet but not icy, the driveway was the worst. I drove down to the shopping center by the creek and got some eggs and a few other things, the Sunday paper which I normally got during the mornings. While out I drive over to my house to check on things there. It's gotten down into the 40s inside, except for the room with one heater still going, it's 55 in that room. The power had stayed on there too. Picked up some cereal and grapfruit juice I had there and then go on back to mom's.
It's about 4 when I get back there. Just enough time to look at a few pages in the paper, eat and get ready for work. It was the normal early crowd at the pizza place, there was only 5 workers instead of the usual 7 or 8. It was hard to keep up but it was pretty much over in 2 1/2 hours. They closed early since none of the chruch groups would be there, their evening services were cancelled I guess.
I get back to mom's house, clean up some and watch a bit of tv with her, that million dollar questions show. Then I went on to bed. I actually slept all night.
Monday morning. I get up and fix a couple of bologna and egg sandwiches and a bowl of cereal, more morning food than I normaly eat. The toast and syurp I had fixed the morning before turned soggy in the microwave, didn't really like eating that. I pack up my stuff and move everything back to my house later this morning.
Set up the propane tank and burner in the kitchen and let it burn a few minutes, trying to warm the house back up and get familar with how that thing worked. I start smelling some gas, not a lot, kind-a like you'd smell a kerosine heater. Couldn't really tell it till I'd step into the other room and back into the kitchen. I gave it about 5 or 7 minutes, then chickened out, turn the thing off, sat it all back out on the porch after it cooled off.
I guess I'd rather just be cold and wait it out when the power goes. That's what I've come to do anyway. Burning wood in the fireplace doesn't work, it just draws in the cold air. It's what Mom has done all these years anyway too.
I'm not really a happy winter camper, not anymore.
Wednesday, Jan 26, 2000
6:00a
When all else fails, do house cleaning. Well, a little bit anyway, got the kitchen counter cleared off, mostly. Activity keeps the blues at bay. The sun came and went yesterday, more went than came, except for the late afternoon. That helped too. There's something else too, I think I've let the caffine-nicotine spirial out of control. I drank less coffee the two mornings over at mom's and smoked a little less too. Havent got that tense feeling as much either. I'll probably go back to it though.
Another project came to mind yesterday too. I whittled on the drumming sticks I made out of the hickery bush I trimmed back, the one that's beside the metal building. Then I happen to think about the lumber in the back room, might make a good drum set. How does one tune wood? As if I've got the ear for a tune. It really gets back to being physically active rather than mentally active. There's just too much doubt about what I can do with programming, writing, engineering now. Probably so far behind everyone else it doesn't matter anymore. So now it's back to building things, just to be doing something.
It took from 10 Monday morning to late afternoon Tuesday to get the house back to normal warm. It's turned cool again this morning, 3,200 watts just barely keeps up.
There's one other project that's needs more and more attention now. The crack in the block work for the front porch is getting worse, quicker. It's been like that for I don't know how long, 5 or 10 years. The foundation, if there really is any, is eroding underneath, mostly from the rain runoff from the roof. I had gutters up but they never drained right and would clog, least be clogged when it rained, then I would unclog them. I guess this Summer I'll actually have to have something done to repair the block work.
Oh well, can't think of anything else to write. Might as well go back to bed. Bye.
Friday, Jan 28, 2000
7:40a
The next storm approachth, I'm out of here.
Friday, Jan 28, 2000
2:40p at Mom's
Sat around the house during the later morning, after going to the pizza place to get my check and then to the bank to cash it. I did some last of the packing, deciding what to take, what to leave. I rewired the long extension cord plug, it had been getting warm, that's one of the worries about leaving it on, in case it didn't cycle on/off like it should. It was cooler to the touch after that. But it was mostly just sitting around worrying about how to leave the place. Heater's on? off? which ones? Curtain open? closed? Turn the water off? leave it on? So that's how the morning went. Left the one heater on and turned the water off and just left at 11:00.
It's still clear and almost sunny now. The storm in over in north Georgia but I had thought it was suppose to start early afternoon. So now I sit here at the kitchen table at Mom's house. Typing away at a make do Journal entry.
Saturday, Jan 29, 2000
6:30p at Mom's
I gave up on the entry yesterday, just didn't feel like writing, always thinking about what is to come. It's still coming too.
It's been off and on sprinkling and drizzling most of this afternoon. It's freezing too, temperature is right at 32. I can't tell from the reports if it is to pick up any more or if it's just a little at at time. Of course I'm always thinking of the worst that can happen.
Last night at work it was the usual busy Friday evening. I couldn't really keep up with the cutting and which orders were which. I quit trying and just cut pizzas and placed them on the take out table. Of course I was wondering if it would start with the snow, sleet before I got off and had to drive through it back up hill to Mom's. It didn't. It's all just been slow getting here.
I didn't rest well last night either, one of the half sleep all time thinking nights. Doze a little and wake up over and over again. Finally went to the bathroom at 4:00am and laid back down, 6:00am came around soon enough, I must have slept some and didn't realize it.
Went outside and smoked a cig while the coffee was making. I do that a lot, go outside to smoke. I fixed a ham, egg, cheese sandwich this morning. Cooked it in the small cast iron frying pan that's older than me. Then I shaved, washed my hair over the sink. The rest of the morning I laid on the couch in the den.
Mom had gotten up and ate her normal breakfast then went back to bed. She didn't sleep well eight. So that's how the morning went.
I went up to a burger place after noon time to get us something different to eat. The roads where just wet, not icy. But down at first traffic light after you cross the bridge, they were 2 truck and a car all banged up and crushed in. Don't really know what caused it. It was'nt the roads. Someone trying to get the last of the yellow while someone else tries for the first of the green. I got the burgers and drove down Jewell St, up Edens Rd and down Spark Dr to get around it and back to the store.
Most of the afternoon has been more sitting around, worry, wait, watch outside. I just get really tense about these things now. Ate some supper just a while ago. Something to get my mind on something else. So now I'm doing a better.
Guess it's tim to go do the cig thing and watch more tv. I just want to go to bed and sleep through it all till morning.
Monday, Jan 31, 2000
4:30p
I'm back at my house now, least till the next strom and that might be Thursday.
I've been dumping heat back into the rooms for about 5 hours now. It's up to 70 in the room I stay in all the time, the kitchen is 60. The rooms got down to 50 with just the 600 watts heater, least that's what it was when I got here this morning about 10:00. The furniture is still cold, the air temp went up about 10 degrees the first 45 minutes, then it's been a slow climb since then.
The ice started to get really bad Sunday morning till about 1:00, that's when it quite drizzling. If it had gone another 3 or 4 hours it would have brought down more trees and powerlines. No one we know had power go out, maybe the last storm a week ago brought all the weak trees down and they got those lines fixed.
Tuesday, Feb 1, 2000
7:10a
Eleven months left in the year /century /millenium. One tweleth of the year gone and haven't done nearly 1/12th of the things that need to be done. Except worry about ice storms.
Thought of another one of the random ressurrected rememberances the other day, Sunday I guess. I'll have to add it to one of those RRR journal parts. It was about a trip up to DC during a snow storm.
I really can't think of anything new to write. It's just been 3 days of anticipation and anxiety over the ice storm and I've pretty much already wrote about that. Now I'm trying to get back into the routine of being back here at my house. I just don't want to get back into the old, feeling down and blue part of that routine.
There's a couple of new things to do, actually they're things that should have been done long ago. Mostly fix the things that need fixing around here and at Mom's house. Add insulation in the attic and under the floors, the front porch block work, better heating system, programming, blah, blah, blah. Over at Mom's house there's the shut-off valve in the toilet in the laundry room, have the chimney cleaned (I don't think it's ever been cleaned in 40 years), steps up into the attic, emergency heat for her house, more blah, blah, blah. Oh yeah, there's that ever present get a better, full time job for me too.
Thursday, Feb 3, 2000
8:15a
Yesterday afternoon, about 1:20, the phone rang. I answered it. Click. Another one of them automated telemarketers looking for an answering machine to leave their junk voice mail on. About 10 minutes later, it was the same thing again, except I let it ring a couple of extra times. I've learned those automated systems hang up after the third ring. About an hour after the first one it rang again. I let it ring four times then answered it but didn't say anything. I've picked up that from brother Robert, let them start talking first. But they didn't. An hour more and it rings again. This time a lady said "Hello?" after a short pause of silence.
She had been to my website and was doing genealogy work. She maintains webpages for Pickens county at the rootsweb and was wanting to know if I would help do some. She liked what I've done with the Tour of Pickens County section, said a lot of nice and kind words about my work. [Lonehawk blushes, ahhh geeee, thanks Tracy.] I had been to those pages at rootsweb before, I recognized the flowers after I went there. I guess I'll try to do something for them, maybe some links to what I've already done at this website.
Also yesterday, I started to mess around with VB programming again. More to re-learn what I've forgotten from non-use than anything else. There's a couple of things I'll try doing, a pizza place cash register, some math practice for elementary level, finish up that LSW design program that should have been done 9 months ago. At least I'm starting to get my mind out of last year's blues rut.
It's 47 days till Spring. That's the only good thing about Winter Solistice, the countdown to Spring and warm weather begins.
Sunday, Feb 6, 2000
10:25a
There was another pleasant surprise phone call late yesterday morning. This time it was from a lady up in Virginia who had come across my website, well she picked it up from another lady over in Traveler's Rest. She was asking about my Gravely connections too. But there was a bit of extra surprise. She taught at the high school in 1964-65, English, before leaving to go up North, she'd been up there for 35 years. Yesterday evening I got out the ole Gem yearbooks and looked her up. There right beside her picture was her "Best of Luck!" and autograph, I guess I must have made a point to get hers. I think she probably taught me English that sophomore year, I can't remember who taught which classes much anymore. Her face did look familiar though.
I've done some more work on the pizza menu, cash register program. I think it might develop into something worthwhile. Not that it'll be sellable, just a fairly decient application, there's tons of cash register programs and machines out there already.
That flag thing has drawn me back. There's been a couple more articles and reports in the news again. I've had it in my head to do a letter to the editor, and things like that just bug me till I do them, even though I know it'll never make much diff. At least I did it and took it up to the Sentinel office yesterday, just slid it in through the mailslot and left. They're not open on Saturday afternoons. So that's out of my mind, again. I really don't see much of any good comming out of the whole issue now. There's too many fundmental principles being broken, and it's going to leave a bad legacy for some future generations' heritage.
There was an article in today's paper about another suscession in the Southwest, a future one in about 80 years. It'll be for the Hispanic culure that develops there. There was some novel a couple of years ago about another suscession in the Northwest, I've forgotten what that was suppose to be about, economic reasons I think. That's what I've begun to see in the future as well for the Southeast. There's always be some half-joking comment about the Afro-Americans eventually wanting their own region of the country. The way society is developing with new majorities in the different parts of the country, it'll probably happen, sometime.
That is of course unless the food wars, fossil fuel depletions and other economic / political divisions don't happen first. Then we all will just be back to working the same sharecrop fields again like in the 1930s.
Oh well, I need to spend some time adding that letter to the Dear Editor section, some rememberances to the RRR section, may even try to add to the Tour of Pickens County section.
Hi Mrs. C. [Sure do hope I got all these words spelt write.] :)
Tuesday, Feb 8, 2000
8:45a
Added words and a couple of new pictures to the Whitewater Falls part of the Tour of Pickens County section. That's how I spent yesterday and part of this morning.
Friday, Feb 11, 2000
6:05a
The roller-coaster of motivation is in a dip, again. Lost interest in last weeks' activity. Maybe it's just because those things are done and I want to feel like I don't have to do anymore. And then again, there's always more to do. Oh well.
Yesterday morning, I think this has been a Yesterday's Journal for a long time now, it's seldom Today's Juornal, I got a call from the man I worked for at Singer/Ryobi. I met him and his wife down at the grocery store by the creek a couple of weeks ago and he told me then that he was trying to get me some work back at that place. He called to tell me what the status was, it'll be for just a month and I'll have to work through that temp agency they use now. It has something to do with sound analysis, noise, mostly just lab tec work I guess. So that's something new to have to think about. I'll have to work both jobs I guess, all day at the Singer/Ryobi place and then some evenings.
Then there's this other bit of job news. The man who runs the Hagood mill was down at the pizza place one night this week. He motioned and called me over to a corner. He said the building maintaince (cleaning and jaintor work) man where he works is retiring and they're be hiring someone for that job. That'd be full time and all too. But I'll have to go through the State Employment Commission, seems like all the businesses use them as their personal department now, and I know that'll be fun. I've done that process before, it's so troublesome, like having to write up 30 plus years of job history on 4 x 6 index cards, treating each promotion as a different job. Then there's me having all that engineering and programming background followed by unemployed years mixed with parttime, teenage pizza cook work and grocery produce stocker work. Ha, yeah sure, where's your jaintorian experience?
Just after the phone call about the sound analysis job, it was almost time to go to Mom's for the lunch time routine when he call, I went out and cranked the truck to leave and looked up. There were 5 deer walking down the ridge next to the driveway. Oh wow! I turned the truck off and just sat there to watch. They went on down the bank and across the road into the other woods. That's about 3 times I've seen deer in my woods in recent months. The other two times they were up near the old mule shed. All that got me to thinking about putting out a wildlife salt lick, or something else, to attrack them. Maybe I'll do that. Of course I also think about those who still do gardening around here, and keeping deer in the neighbor probably wouldn't be good for them.
After I quit working on the cash register program and Whitewater Falls write up, I made a rain-sound tube. I had seen that on one of those after school kids shows on PBS. It's just a cardboard tube with toothpicks stuck through it, lots of them, and dried beans inside. Then you just tilt the tube out and back and listen to the beans bounce and roll down through the tube. I guess that's just another indication of how bored I get sometimes, or desperate for something construction to do. It's all part of making noise with sticks and boards I started a couple or three weeks ago too.
Drove down to the big store in Easley yesterday too. Mom's vacuum cleaner hasn't worked right for years, another one of those things I've kept putting off. I did try to fix that bag so it'll stay on once, but it didn't work and then I forgot about it all again. So anyway, she mentioned that again yesterday and I got some sales papers out of the closet and looked through them. Then went on down to the big store in Easley. They had severval different models and prices, from $50 to $260. I hate having to buy stuff like that. It's all just a lot of doubt about which one, will it work right, is that one too cheap, is that really worth the money, do I ever make the right choice? So I fret about that for 30 minutes or more, just standing there looking at them, then walk around a bit and come back to look some more. I actually think my standing around there so long attracks the store employees attention, like I'm a potential shoplifter or something. Geessh. I end up doing what I usually do, buy the least expensive thing, thinking if it's a piece of junk or doesn't work it'll not be as much money wasted on one of the more expensive models, that probably wouldn't work either.
Monday, Feb 14, 2000
3:35p
Sat by the campfire ring beside the driveway for a short while this afternoon. The weather is early Spring like today, drifting clouds, warm-cool breeze, sunny, heard a falcon call, or hawk, I never know the diff. I realized while there I've lost my ability to keep one step ahead of the blues. Maybe it's just because being outside and sitting on one of the sitting rocks keeps the blues away. Maybe it's just because I don't do that kind of thing as much as I use too. But anyway and for whatever the reason, I've lost it. I can't keep one step ahead of the blues anymore. Spent too much time looking over my shoulder and that something caught up with me.
House cleaning is putting away all those un-finished projects in one of the backrooms, out of sight out of mind, or just plain ole out of mind, or stashing the blues away. I suppose I could have worked more on the drumming sticks and boards, then I could have beat back the blues.
That letter got published in the Sentinel last week. There's been only a couple who commented on it, they liked it. But then they're the others who just don't mention it. Too deep into the philosophy of symoblism I guess. But anyway, it's just another message stashed away in print on microfilm. In another 135 years they'll be someone sitting at a microfilm reader down at the county library, scrolling along looking for their geneaology history, or maybe just looking. Then it might be noticed. Ha, "Who's this Jerry Hughes and why ain't he in the history books somewhere?"
Bye.
Tuesday, Feb 15, 2000
8:35a
Dwelling deep down in the darkest depths of despair, depression and disallusionment deamons lurk about the dying damnation of human dignity. Ooooo, a new record me thinks, 12 "d" words. Dirty dozen? ... damnation of a dozen, dirty deeds by human dignity. Ha, now it's 15.
I'm out of here, those deamons are gaining on me again.
4:05p
I cleaned out the campfire ring this afternoon. Don't remember the last time I did that, several years ago, a few years longer than when I last had a real fire down there. It's always been too dry, too hot, too windy, too rainy, too cold or some other reason not to have one. Seems like I had a small fire for a few minutes during December 1998 probably Winter Solistice and the conditions were half right. I guess the last time I had a burn the past event there was in those ashes and coals, they're all piled up next to the bank on the old road cut up into the woods. I think I saw some of the spiral springs from some notebooks in the coals too. Wonder what writings I burned?
Wednesday, Feb 16, 2000
6:30a
Started working on that house number sign, it's been 6 or 7 years since the 911 street renumbering thing, I guess it's time to fix that $200 sign up right, before it really does cost me $200. I did it the first but never put it on the house, I just leaned it up against the steps. The varnish flaked off from the sun's rays too, so now I'm using the same yellow house paint this time. I'll put it up by the mailbox too so it'll be seen at the road.
It's been a 4 o'clock wakeup this morning, the 6 hours of sleep and then wake up to the real world again, that's the norm again. It's been the usual boring time this morning too. The news is the same ole boring items, takes about 90 seconds to get the junk email, I just read the link titles at the web news sites they're the same ole boring items on the tv news, then I spend time at some random site, looking and wondering. I eventually get tired and do the morning grooming rituals, which I've done already, so now it's sit here and try to think of something worth writing and reading.
After I got the campfire ring cleaned out I got to study on how to put that personal time capsule in it. It'll be hard to get a drain dug in, the ground is to level and there'll be no where to run the water that seeps in. I guess it'll just have to be a water tight thing, and that will be hard to make, I'm not spending money on some real capsule either, just what I can make myself.
I still got to do that excavation project too, dig around down there where the old road cuts were. Those banks turn up into the woods where the rockfalls is but I just can't see how the wagons could have made it up that steep part. Maybe it's just washed out over the decades and become steeper.
Well, there's no profound thoughts springing up, I'll go do some more on that house number sign now. .... Ok, that's was a thrilling 5 minutes.
Maybe I'll get the tax thing done today. It won't be like last year with the simple phone-in filing. I'll have to go back to a regular 1040 form again this year, just to account for that research job I did for the museum last year. All because it's just a few dollars over that minium for bumps one up from the simple filing forms. Then next year they'll send me the regular filing forms and I'll be back down in the easy forms bracket again. It's been like that since I quit a regular job. One year it's the regular forms, next year it's the simple forms, then it's back to the regular forms.
Friday, Feb 18, 2000
4:15p
It's turned into the same morning, noon, afternoon, evening routine like the later part of last year. I really didn't want that to happen again. It's so boring and tiresome. I'm just putting in the time till the next thing that just absolutely has to be done is started.
It's 30 days, more or less, till Spring Day 2000. I saw on a calendar it will be a Full Moon again too, the Winter Solistice was on a Full Moon, now the Spring Equinox will be. I'm looking for signs among the celestial coincidences again. It's strange how this even thousand year thing is, something's suppose to happen.
I tried writting some more on the Lone Hawk story. It was last July when I started that. I still don't have the story in my head, just images I make stuff up to go with. It's probably not even that, it's just stuff I have to make up. It's so much easier when I have something half real to write about. Easier still when it's something I really feel like writing about.
I went down to the campfire ring yesterday and made some pictures. I put my feather headband on and the feather tassle, got my walking staff and my camera, then walked on down there. I setup the tripod and made four pictures. They didn't turn out all that good, the resolution among the leaves and woods just isn't enough to bring out the details. But anyway, that's done.
There's still that option about burying something down there too. It runs out the 29th, Leap Year Day. I guess I really should put some there and the one uptown too, even if I never get around to actually doing the first one. Ha, yeah sure, create a bit of mystery for some future generation. The world's going to be so different then, it'll be the Depression Years all over again, except 10 fold worst.
Tuesday, Feb 22, 2000
8:55a
I'm not in a good mood to write anything, haven't been for 3 days. Mom's been having problems with coughing since Friday night. So I've been spending more time seeing about her. There's that job possiblity where I use to work and that'll be full time during the days. There's the pizza job some evenings. My lower left back is hurting, I hope it just from sitting in one of the kitchen chairs in Mom's room. Mom doesn't want me to stay at her house at night because it bothers her that her coughing might keep me awake. I feel bad because I can't seem to do enough to help her.
So it's all just more bad times looming ahead and I'm not going write anymore.
Wednesday, March 8, 2000
6:15a
So, how does one pick up where one left off some 3 weeks ago?
I just now flipped the calendars over from February to March, it's really just been 2 weeks, but it seems like three, that's how confused I've become.
Mom got in such bad shape I had to call EMS to help get her to the hospital. Or she finally decided she had to go and let me finally call them. She had pneumonia, spent 2 days in CCU and 4 more days in a regular room. Now she's been home a week. There's lots I could write about, telling about that experience. But I just don't feel up to it. It'll be another long-short story I guess, some day.
I've been working the new-old job at Ryobi for a week and couple of days now too. It's all just making sound measurements so far. And there's a couple of stories to tell about that too.
The pizza job has become more hectic and I've lost my patience with trying to keep up when it gets busy. I think it's a combination of it really being more busy and me just loosing it with all that's been going on these last 3 weeks.
There use to be talk long ago about Murphy's Law. I haven't thought of it in a long time. But it's still active. I remember the original part and I think the second part was added later, it's the second part that is most applicable. "If something can go wrong it will, ... and at the most inopportune time." That's what the last few weeks have been, and most of my life.
February 29, 2000 has come and gone. That once in 400 years day. I didn't have time and was not in a good mindset to really ponder it. That was one of the busier, confusing days too. Mom got out of the hosiptal that evening, I had went on to work at the pizza place, had made 3 or 4 trips here and there taking care of errands that day too, then here comes uncle Bob in to the pizza place to tell they're letting Mom go home. I went up to the hospital and helped there and was going to her house after that. I was sitting at the traffic light at Main and Pendleton, there across the street at the Morris building they were burying the time capsule. That's when I remember what day it was, that once in 400 years day. Also remembered the plan of adding a map to my own time capsule in there too. But all that is passed now. I really hope such days and events happen only once in 400 years.
Sunday, March 26, 2000
2:45p
Spring Equinox and the Full Moon for the 2000 year has come and gone. So much has come and gone these past four or five weeks too.
I've been staying over at Mom's house for the last two weeks. She's been in and out of the hospital, had pneumonia and let it get too far along. Learned she has congestive heart failure during the week in the hospital. She's probably had that for years and we just didn't know it. Her sister Leander stayed with her that first week out of the hospital and then she spent a week by herself. But I could tell she wasn't getting over it by that weekend, so I just moved back over there.
And that's the way it's been for two weeks. Running from one errand to another, one job to another, sleeping in the front bedroom and getting up at 5:00 and 5:30 to start it all over again. I went from much of nothing to do a month ago to everything to do at the same time.
There's serveral stories to tell in elderly parent care, along with new/old job and that old parttime, teenage, pizza cook job. It's all new to me, this serious elderly parent care. I've heard of other families and their ordeals over the years, and I knew these days were coming long ago, but still it's all new to me. I guess I'll just have to add them to one of the Random Ressurrected Rememberances parts of this Journal. It's too soon to have to re-live them now.
What really bugs me is that the two things happened at the same time, that Murphy's law thing. I could have dealt with seeing about Mom if that's all there was to do, have pleanty of time during the day to do what needs to be done. Or I could have dealt with the new/old job at Ryobi, if that's was all there was to do. But it's just that things happen at the wrong times.
There was something I thought of that went with Murphy's law, but now I can't remember. ... Oh yeah, the Negation Principle, "If you think of something, something else will come along and negate it." I thought of making some hamburgers on Thursday with some beef that was leftover from last weekend. It stayed in the refrigirator for most of the week. Mom had put it in the freezer that afternoon. I thought this year was getting off to a good start, one of the better ones in recent years. The ice storms were over, Spring was approaching, going to do lots of outside work before it got hot. Then mom got in bad shape with pneumonia. I think the evening's work is about over at the pizza place and will get to leave early. Then in comes a big crowd. I think Saturday will be a good time to cut grass at mom's house, it had been warming up most of the week. Then it gets cloudy and cold again.
There's just something about thinking and that invokes an automatic negation.